End Of The Line

Slowly, she walked into the general store.

She looked at the man behind the counter. "Hello." he said. "Welcome to The Trading Post." She turned away from him, unable to speak. Even now, even at a time like this, he was as cheerful as ever, the same as she always remembered him being.

Even though the end was coming. The end of everything.

She'd heard about it a month prior. Since then she'd been to every town and city she had passed through on her journey years ago. She caught up with old friends, fought some old enemies. And even though nothing on the surface had changed, it all felt different somehow. She paid more attention to the smaller details of the world around her. The way weeds gently formed pathways on less-used cobblestones. The way moss spread to cover the side of a stone wall. The quiet corners of the shop she was standing in right now, where people rarely browsed.

It was all just as she had remembered, now appreciated in a new light. And it would all be going away.

Chatzy Madness Volume 375: Alfred Hitchcock, Original Shitposter

 Jumpropeman: new bartender?
Draco: Heck....that's way better than mine. D:
Jumpropeman: I don't see yours doing midair splits BI
Draco: No, this is true. :(
Draco: And look at that bar! So clean!

--- 

Jumpropeman: "Appearance
Blond mohawk (A Goofy Movie), buzzcut (An Extremely Goofy Movie), sunglasses, necklace with a gold triangle, ear piercing, white T-shirt (green in "An Extremely Goofy Movie"), shorts (pants in "An Extremely Goofy Movie"), and sandals (shoes in "An Extremely Goofy Movie")"
Jumpropeman: disney wiki on point with Bobby's wardrobe

---

Hooded Pitohui: My PROPS to JRM, for being a fellow willing to genuinely come back after a highly active season and writing 100 Fites to put forth the effort needed to give a living piece of candy a well-written, respectful death.
Jumpropeman: thank you pitohui! I must have tapped a vein too personal while writing this because it got me to tears
Hooded Pitohui: You made me tear up a little, too, so it's not just you, though I'm a sentimentalist anyways. You really gave this fellow a fitting ending.
Draco: My goodness, what an emotional scene! ;o;
Hooded Pitohui: srspost - which, unless JRM has a surprise in store, I think wraps it up
Hooded Pitohui: My thanks to you, JRM, for this epilogue!
Jumpropeman: thank you pitohui. The scene was about Yellow, but it was for Hermes
Hooded Pitohui: It was, truly! I'm glad to say that, after all of this, Hermes and Kino will be back in S11, hopefully with the both of them getting more individual moments and chances to play off of other characters.
Jumpropeman: oh! That's good to hear!
RubyChao: god fucking dammit you two
RubyChao: you made a legitimately strongly emotional scene out of a living piece of candy and a talking motorcycle
RubyChao: zfrp at its finest
Jumpropeman: it's not about what they are chao, but who they are
Gooper Blooper joined the chat
Gooper Blooper: APPROACHING FEELS BARRIER
Sumalee: was reading this epilogue before i came back in here and
Sumalee: i'm crying over a peanut m&m...
Jumpropeman: me too harp
Sumalee: you've seen crying over an old lady and a hermit crab, now witness crying over a talking motorcycle and an m&m!
Gooper Blooper: he approached the sound barrier, harpy
Gooper Blooper: he did it.
Sumalee: STOP I CAN'T SEE IT IN THE SAME JOKEY WAY ANYMORE
Sumalee: you've ruined this meme and it hurts my heart
Draco: I gotta step up my game. You're next, Bag of Chips.
Gooper Blooper: and hermes will cast his gaze into the sky, see his friend among the stars, and say
Gooper Blooper: "look, a nut"
Sumalee: i'm glad i swallowed my coffee.
RubyChao: that's what happened to me too, harpy
RubyChao: the meme just isn't the same...
Sumalee: this meme... is sacred.
Sumalee: i'm glad i experienced this very epilogue without distractions.

Talk To Transformer

https://talktotransformer.com/

Give this website a prompt and it will "write" something for you based off of it. Here's some ZFRP-flavored AI stories. Enjoy.

(The text in bold at the beginning is the prompt I wrote. Italic text in parenthesis is my own comments, added post-generation.)

---

Let the ninth Big Bar Brawl begin! After completing the main quest "A Friend in Need," return to the Sanctuary to finish the quest "A Friendship Gone Viral."

Notes

The Big Bar Brawl takes place after the player completes the mission "A Friend in Need."

The quest "A Friend in Need" cannot be completed until after completing this quest.

The Big Bar Brawl is the first Big Bar Brawl outside of the Caverns of Time. After completing this quest you will receive 5 Big Bar Brawls for free.

Bugs

If the player stands to the right of the bar to receive the fight on the other side before the beginning of the encounter, they will see the Big Bar to the left, but in the center. A fix is to return to where you received the fight, stand to the side of the bar, and turn away to receive the fight from the other side and wait outside to receive it.

If the player dies during the fight, they can simply continue on with the quest.

(Five Brawls for free, huh? I think you'll need to start outsourcing, JRM.)

A New Era Dawns

"Good Evening. This is Slow Weather Jamz, your source for 24/7 weather coverage in, on, and around Olympia. Stay with us, and stay informed.

Here's your weather forecast for Tuesday, April 16."

All across Olympia, restaurants and homes and vehicles alike heard the sounds of the local forecast begin on their TVs and radios. It may be above the clouds, but there was still plenty to talk about regarding Olympia's weather. Temperature and wind speed, for starters, not to mention the city was subject to artificial rain at certain preplanned times to keep the decorative plants watered and to make the city feel a little more 'natural'. Of course, nothing about Olympia was natural. This city was schemed up in a board meeting years ago, and built from the ground up to one day be a flying spectacle. At last, that day had come.

But was the world ready for this? Had Olympia's time come too soon? Or was it time for the people of Earth to step forward into a bold new age of interplanetary alliances?

Assembly

-ZFPD BUILDING-

Donuts were the finest food to ever be invented. On this, Officer Patricia Wagon was absolutely certain. She didn't care if cops and donuts was a stereotype - they were delicious, dammit, and nothing would keep her from her daily donut. But as she finished eating her treat and washed it down with a sip of black coffee, her eyes drifted over her mug to the girl sitting across from her nibbling worriedly on a toaster pastry with one hand while scanning the Hoku Lewa Times newspaper she clutched in her other hand. The girl looked like an overwound toy, ready to snap if the slightest thing went wrong... even though so far things had been smooth sailing.

Of course, Patty suspected she knew why.

"Are you going to be ready for this?"

"AAAGH!" Denise Marmalade flung her newspaper into the air in a panic, though she miraculously didn't throw her pop-tart. "What?! Now?! OKAY!" She opened her mouth wide-

"Wait, wait, hold on-"

Denise promptly shoved the entire rest of her pop-tart into her mouth, and promptly began choking on it. Patty groaned, put down her coffee, and slipped behind her coworker for the Heimlich maneuver. Once the artificial incident was over with, Patty spun Denise around and put her hands firmly on her shoulders.

"You're too tense, Denise. You need to calm down."

"B-but the kobbers are coming! They're coming in less than ten days! Some of them are already HERE!"

"I know. And there will be incidents, and there will be trouble, and there will be stress. I get it. But you have to take it easy and not act like it's the end of the world. This happens every year! I've read all about it, Browny's told me stories, it's crazy compared to other places but here it's nothing new. So just try and take it one day at a time, alright?"

"A... a-alright. Thanks, Officer Wagon."

"Please. We're coworkers!" Patricia patted Denise on the shoulder and gave her a friendly smile. "Call me Patty."

Chatzy Madness Volume 308: A Distinct Lack of Sephine

On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: Miu tries to improve on Dawn's design 'just to show her she can'
RubyChao: she would
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: Creates my main 2019 villain Twilight
RubyChao: and/or attempt to sexually proposition her
Jumpropeman: miu would make a more sexually charged design than dirk i wager
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: Dawn: YOU JUST HAD TO USE THE ULTRON SCHEMATICS DIDN'T YOU.
RubyChao: miu and dirk collaborate and dawn's just like
RubyChao: "this is a sexbot design isn't it" "yep!"
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: Dawn: You just HAD to show you could TAME them, didn't you.
Jumpropeman: Dawn is no longer human
Gooper Blooper: Dawn was never human
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: Dawn: Such a design is unnecessary.
Jumpropeman: Gooper! How rude!
RubyChao: OR WAS SHE
RubyChao: DID JRM JUST REVEAL HER DARK BACKSTORY
Jumpropeman: *Faith piledrives gooper*
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: Dawn: The octopus is TECHNICALLY correct...
Jumpropeman: Faith: "HE'S MORE OF A SQUIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID"
Draco: DeMonde teleports to where Zeldoten is and brings her back. She smacks both her and Dawn upside the noggin. "Play nice or I'm grounding zhe both of you." Then she goes back to making her own Hedorah or something IDK.
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: Dawn puts Miu in STEM to help her with Chaos' reformation/reformatting since she's SO GOOD with machines.
Jumpropeman: "Gooper Blooper is a larger than average Blooper who never displays much in the way of intelligence"
Jumpropeman: mariowiki is harsh to our good friend
RubyChao: that's cause they're blooperacists

---

On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: Shining Force has a subtitle, much like The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship Of The Ring.
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: Subtitles can really add to something sounding epic
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: STAR WARS: THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: TERMINATOR 2: JUDGEMENT DAY
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: KNACK 2: YES THIS EXISTS
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: So guess what the Shining Force subtitle is
Jumpropeman: KNACK 2 BABYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYy
ivel: STAR WARS EPISODE I: THE PHANTOM MENACE
ivel: :U
ivel: anyway I dunno
RubyChao: THE KING OF LIMBO
ivel: The Shining?
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: It is....SHINING FORCE: THE LEGACY OF GREAT INTENTION
Jumpropeman: gotta love the things that have nonsense subtitles
On Steam Wishlist-REVENGE: ....I think someone mighta have been confused over some Japanese kakana aspects
Jumpropeman: Croc: Legend of the Gobbos
Jumpropeman: holy shit man, I gotta know about that Gobbo legend
Jumpropeman: hold up guys, I might blow your mind with this hot take on Croc: Legend of the Gobbos
Jumpropeman: its not a game about the legend behind the Gobbos
Jumpropeman: no, Croc perhaps IS the legend of the Gobbos, for his bravery in collecting generic crystals
ivel: :O
Phone: You're rapidly losing my financial support, but go on
ivel: with this revelation, I need to go to bed to process this
Jumpropeman: Gobbos, by the by, appearing to be Tribbles with eyes
Jumpropeman: and naturally, Croc was raised by the Gobbos, who found him in the exact same way baby Moses was found in the Bible
Jumpropeman: "One day, Baron Dante and his band of villains known as the Dantinis invade Gobbo Valley and begin terrorizing the Gobbos, capturing them and locking them in steel cages. Amidst the chaos, King Rufus summons a magical yellow bird named Beany, who uses her magical abilities to transport Croc to safety"
Jumpropeman: why don't I own Croc
Phone: Final Fantasy 14-7, Return of the Unrepetent Subtitles
Draco: Because it might actually have decent gameplay.
Phone: I was gonna suggest the opposite to Draco's quip. 8u Ya got distracted with good games for a bit and lost your badsenses.
Phone: So is Dante more the Gaming Inferno, or the Devil May Crier
Jumpropeman: I was legitimately thinking of starting Fallout:New Vegas lately, but Ven is right. I've strayed from my roots. Time to look into playing Croc: Legend of the Gobbos instead

Kuwahawi, Here We Come!

Come along and ride on a fantastic voyage...

Dolby smiled and bobbed her head, listening to her tunes as she looked carefully around her room one last time to make absolutely sure she wasn't forgetting anything important. Not only did she have three big suitcases packed with personal items, but she was using herself as suitcase number four, having shoved all the nostalgia into her body she could comfortably carry. Perusing her depleted rack of cassette tapes one more time, she opted to grab one last blank tape and cram it into her mouth to join the rest.

"Dolby, it is time to depart." Odyssey droned from behind her. He carried only a single small case of items - his arcade machines were being shipped to Kuwahawi Island separately.

"Yeah, I think I'm set." Dolby nodded, smiling at her friend and turning her music down. "I still can't believe you're coming to Kuwahawi. I really thought I'd be the only Nostalgia Elemental to follow the Kobbers."

"Las Vegas is my home, and I will miss it. And when this is over, I will enjoy being back home." Odyssey's pupils flicked back and forth, looking at the ransacked state of Dolby's room as she had taken tons of her personal belongings and packed them up. "But I believe your desire to see more of the world is not without merit, and the opportunity to introduce these natives to arcade gaming is one I do not wish to miss. It shall be a worthwhile endeavor."

"Man, this place is gonna feel empty with you two gone."

Dolby and Odyssey turned to see Zenith, Sinclair, and Noir standing in the hallway, crowded around the entrance to Dolby's room. It had been Sinclair who had spoken, and he lowered his camera-like head. "We'll miss you."

"Come back safe, all right?" Zenith said, stepping in close. "I'll keep these two in line in the meantime."

"And when you get back," Noir piped up, "we can throw ourselves a little shindig!"

Zenith chuckles. "Sounds like a plan. In the meantime, have fun. We'll make sure to keep you in mind with music and games while you're gone."

Dolby grinned and hugged Zenith. "Thanks! Don't worry - we might get scuffed up a bit-"

"Might?" Sinclair laughed. "It's the kobbers! And you even said you want to fight in that Brawl they do every summer!"

"Hah, yeah! So we WILL get scuffed up. And probably worse. But we'll come back in one piece, just you wait and see!"

Odyssey began to move to the hall. "I shall miss you all as well. When you next see me, I shall have made arcade history."

Dolby followed Odyssey, and Sinclair came after them - it was he who would drive them to the airport. And as the waving Zenith and Noir vanished in the rear-view mirror and Odyssey and Sinclair made small talk, Dolby held up her smartphone and stared at her wallpaper, depicting her and her two best friends. Soon, she would finally see them again.

Chatzy Madness Volume 250: I Want To Kill Old Jumpropeman

(A deathtrap set by a Cornwind villain is destroyed before it can kill anyone)

Cornwind Evil: I dangled the chance for JRM and Sheep to massacre characters and then cruelly snatched it away
Jumpropeman: sadly, Melvin Underbelly would have just gummed up those threshers :(
Maid Sheep: Truly
Maid Sheep: I was going to break the nice Junkos and Eleven Thirtys
Maid Sheep: ...break out
Maid Sheep: clearly, I meant break out

---

iKomodo: I used to really like Harry Potter
iKomodo: but then the movies came along and you could tell the people making them just wanted to make money off of it
iKomodo: so I lost interest. I saw the corporate machine behind the silver screen and got away whilst I could
Jumpropeman: and JK Rowling's been none too kind to her series after the books ended with the same motivations
Jumpropeman: that Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them movie could be interesting though
Jumpropeman: since it seems to be an original story at least
iKomodo: I was hype for it, then I found they were stretching it into another fucking trilogy when a standalone film would have done
Jumpropeman: ...no way
iKomodo: and my erection wilted like a Venus flytrap in the presence of a hungry brontosaurus

---

CloudyChao: fun fact of the day
CloudyChao: danbooru is so old, it predates touhou 9
CloudyChao: which came out in 2005
Gooper Blooper: There are a fair few super-old sites now, if by "super-old" you go by, say, 10 years or older
CloudyChao: yeah, it's kind of interesting
CloudyChao: you don't really realize how long the net's been around until you start looking at the age of a lot of popular sites
Gooper Blooper: Youtube is over 10
Gooper Blooper: Chatzy was created in 2001
CloudyChao: >​chatzy is THAT OLD
CloudyChao: holy shit
Bree: chatzy is 15! it's a teenager!
Bree: it can almost drive!
iKomodo: Yaaaaay
Gooper Blooper: well now that I look at it
Gooper Blooper: the site DOES look pretty simplistic/old-fashioned​, does it not
Tiz: kek

Chatzy Madness Volume 225: OOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAUGH

WorkDel: i just pledged $125 on a kickstarter for plastic space dwarves because i am a maniac

---

Jumpropeman: there's a guy on deviantart who has his own mac tonight costume and wears it to do strange things
sprtgh: JRM I'm sorry but I can only imagine a guy dressing up as Mac Tonight, breaking into people's houses, and then doing nothing but serenading them on their pianos

---

Harpy: i had to tell my dog to stop being adorable

---

Revanchist: I went for pizza. I caved to the booby lady's earnest face and chatting of Tolkien while spaghetti cooked, and now I am eating that instead, fresh from the takehome tin and the paper bag.
Revanchist: MY WILL IS WEAK
Revanchist munches with mourning but secretly pleased recollection

---

Cornwind Evil: It's a CRIMSON incubus
Cornwind Evil: It has some vampire like traits but it is not, technically, a vampire
Cornwind Evil: It's alive for one
Jumpropeman: you're not alive til you tried my momma's goulash

---

Gooper Blooper: important reminder:
Gooper Blooper: Gust and Blade in ZFRP: important characters that developed and grew over the course of a season, interacting with other characters and gaining depth
Gooper Blooper: Gust and Blade in their source material
RubyChao: zfrp.txt
Harpy: lel

Chatzy Madness Volume 209: This Is Our Son, Garbage

RubyChao: so my dream gave me a line that seems like it could have been ripped right out of wulf's old rp
iKomodo: Oh?
RubyChao: "Captain Jaxx Tantra of the USS Murderwolf"
iKomodo: Hahaha

---

WHAT A LOVELY DAY: Oh god mom has discovered siri
WHAT A LOVELY DAY: Fml
RubyChao: rip

---

RubyChao: "brain: why would you buy another game when you already have a plenty of those you haven't played yet
heart: VIDYA GAME"
RubyChao: how true

---

Harpy: to sum up this plot: save monarch by BEATING HIM UP
Gooper Blooper: My second favorite kind of save-the-character plot
Harpy: whats the first
Gooper Blooper: First favorite is when one half of a pairing or pairing-to-be is kidnapped/endangered and the other half leads the charge to rescue them
Gooper Blooper: wuv
iKomodo: wuv
WHAT A LOVELY DAY: Tru wuv
Gooper Blooper: kek
WHAT A LOVELY DAY: Haha
iKomodo: kek

---

(Concerning lots of characters attending the Machina Monarch battle)

Gooper Blooper: I know all about how tough it is to manage characters so I'll rotate like I did for Pestus
Jumpropeman: that's basically what I was thinking
RubyChao: send bulgrave for the final fight
RubyChao: THE ULTIMATE STEAMPUNK CLASH
Gooper Blooper: okay but if I do that Viola is totally still there, just in the background cheering for tenshi
RubyChao: well duh
Gooper Blooper: she's getting a front row seat
RubyChao: viola sits on a keystone made specifically for her
RubyChao: but tenshi only does it because she needs a cheerleader
RubyChao: that's it
Gooper Blooper: that's it, that's all, she just likes having a cheerleader
Gooper Blooper: "oh and since you're a cheerleader, here's a cheerleading outfit to wear while you cheer my name"
Gooper Blooper: "because cheerleaders need cheer outfits, that's all"
RubyChao: how skimpy is it
Bree: viola's cheerleader outfit is black and purple
Gooper Blooper: Not skimpy at all
Gooper Blooper: at first
Gooper Blooper: gotta acclimate her

Chatzy Madness Volume 198: The Whitest of Them All

Hruppyp-n-ghi: Here we go; the classic ZFRP argument. :v You know it's true.
Hruppyp-n-ghi: Though to be fair, most of the ones there -are- buxom. :U We need a Silence figure instead. Draco, have you an Edit handy? :v
Aurora Harpy: well when all your enemies are dead regardless of curves or stength... :U
Hruppyp-n-ghi laughs wickedly at harps' assertion and griiiiiiiiiiiiins until Del bans him
RubyChao: on one side, suho and sephine
RubyChao: on the other side, yuugi and silence :V
Aurora Harpy: in the middle: Kevvy
RubyChao: *kevvy and tenshi
Tableter: Kenshi and tevvy
Gooper Blooper: apparently the actual best body is a tall one - the other two tower over the poor girl in the middle
Hruppyp-n-ghi: Hehhehhh.

---

☯✞follow for more soft goop✞☯ joined the chat
RubyChao follows
Draco: We don't want'cher "soft goop" around here, bub. BI

---

Seth Rollins Wearing Pantyhose joined the chat
Gooper Blooper: Occasionally CW's username reflects not what Seth Rollins is doing, but what Cornwind himself is doing. I doubt this is one of those times.
Hruppyp-n-ghi: Nope. CW's reflecting Daredevil wearing panty hose.
Seth Rollins Wearing Pantyhose: See? Pantyhose
Seth Rollins Wearing Pantyhose: Okay so it's an appropriation of this costume
Seth Rollins Wearing Pantyhose: But it still looks like pantyhose to me on some level
Gooper Blooper: I like it. It's like an upside-down ninja.
Draco: Was he burned with acid? "No, I just find masks to be terribly comfortable. I think they'll be all the rage in the future."
Gooper Blooper: Maybe it ​is​ pantyhose, but characters can turn weird clothing choices into gold
Gooper Blooper: see also: Solid Snake in general, Ramza's assless chaps
iKomodo: Hahaha
Draco: So...yeah...lookin' for Buttercup, Daredevil? You gonna go fight Prince Humperdink?
Aurora Harpy: assless chaps <3
Gooper Blooper: workin it
Draco: Sarah starts throwing dollar bills.
Gooper Blooper: she just slides the money into the straps
iKomodo: XD
Aurora Harpy: the ass no one thought they needed
iKomodo: Oh god
iKomodo: now I have a mental image of Dirk noticing it
iKomodo: and having a mental struggle with himself
iKomodo: "dat butt... IT'S NOT JO! yet dat butt..."
Gooper Blooper: ​Josephine staring as well
Tableter: This looks like my cue to go sleep!
Tableter: :P
Gooper Blooper: kek

The City of Second Chances

-MANHATTAN, NEW YORK-

-TRIDENLAND-

"I can't believe we're shutting down Tridenland..." Sarah moped.

"Oh, don't be so melodramatic, dear!" Celestia said, waving a hand dismissively. "We just can't be in two places at once! It will still be open on a limited basis, just as more of a family fun stop than a full amusement park."

It was true - caught between either leaving the park for yet another summer or ignoring her friends at the King of Beasts, Celestia, ever the businesswoman, had decided to take a third option and make Tridenland into a franchise, with a new location opening in Las Vegas. Manhattan's Tridenland would remain open, but it was not as popular as it was in its' early years, perhaps due to the memories of Zoofights fading and becoming less fresh. Now it would be a smaller, more laid-back experience, with many of the biggest rides being either decommissioned or moved to the new location.

Competing for dollars in Las Vegas was risky, to be sure, but the possible payoff was massive. Celestia mused over this fact as she watched a team of WarMechs led by Skeiron, Mecha-Sarah, and Buzzsaw dismantle a roller coaster for parts while Isotope surveyed the scene and acted as a lookout. She laughed quietly to herself. A big risk for a big payout... that definitely sounded like Vegas, all right.

Celestia looked away from the demolition and took a look at her daughter. Sarah had always had a bit of a healthy, cheery glow about her when happy, but now she seemed to be like that all the time, even when outwardly she could be glum, or bored, or even asleep. And Celestia knew why.

When Alex had popped the question, Sarah's initial quiet response had, predictably, given way to her old giddy excitement, and she'd spent the entire next day vibrating with joy as she told and retold the events of the day before to her family and many of her friends. That initial rush had faded, but a storm of emotions continued to swarm through the little white mage long after the fact.

The wedding was planned for June, currently, and there was still much to be done, but Celestia had been happy to take care of much of the minutiae, and the family as a whole wasn't jonesing for a massive, extravagant affair with dozens of third parties to pay thousands to - especially since Celestia herself could do the catering. No, this would be a simple wedding to plan, if not still fancy in person.

After all, a wedding in the glitziest place on the planet between two people who really, really, REALLY enjoyed sweets wasn't exactly going to be a muted, quiet one.

Chatzy Madness Volume 189: Tenshi Edition

Deleter: wulf i may be coming to the usa in the near future
Saberwulf: Gesp
Deleter: gusp
Saberwulf: Which area of this wonderful land of highways and starbucks would you be visiting?
Deleter: it depends on which part of the training course i take
Saberwulf: Do the one that sends you to the east coast, the west is garbage
Deleter: i could be in ohio, massachusetts, california, washington, colorado
Deleter: wulf i fear your eastcoastness may bias you :P
Deleter: also i have never been to the us ever so
Deleter: i want to experience the long highways, shitty commercials, terrible food and insane worldview fresh and wide-eyed
Saberwulf: Ohio's boring, Mass is okay but HORRENDOUSLY WHITE, Cali's poppin' but the cities are giant slums and everything outside of them is racist and homophobic, Washington if you mean the state is really chill but a burger is 15 dollars and everyone shoots heroin, colorado has legal weed and is a lot cheaper than washington
Deleter: yeah but dross is in ohio so i can go surprise him
Saberwulf: Pff
Deleter: REMEMBER ME CARL
Deleter: WHEN I PLAYED THE ROLES, I TALKED JUST LIKE THIIIIIIS

---

Saberwulf: I apparently rendered a woman a complete sobbing mess with my poetry so I guess I have talent

---

Gooper Blooper: I am going to make a boyga
Gooper Blooper: I also have donuts
Gooper Blooper: good times
Saberwulf: Make the burger from the boondocks
Saberwulf: Bacon cheeseburger between two krispy kreme donuts
Saberwulf: You'll die but damn will it be worth it
Deleter: scorp's famous flaming boygas
Deleter: literally on fire
Gooper Blooper: Can't be done, my donuts are minis
Saberwulf: That's exactly the kind of thing Scorp would make
Saberwulf: Also damn
Draco: That sounds glorious, Wulf.
Gooper Blooper: *sarah eats one in ZFRP*
SteelKomodo: lel

---

Deleter: im
Deleter: im gonna post
Deleter: like right now aaaaaa
Breetannia: STAND BACK EVERYONE, HE'S GONNA DO IT
Breetannia: HE'S GONNA MAKE THE POSTE

---

RubyChao: rip satori
Gooper Blooper: but it's so soft
RubyChao: notice that okuu's boobs smashed her into the wall, though
Gooper Blooper: oh okay
Gooper Blooper: 2booby

Chatzy Madness Volume 188: This Way To Right Asscheek

(Draco is opening packs of Phantom Forces Pokemon cards)

Draco: Helioptile, Finneon, Poochyena, Sewaddle, Chansey, shiny Escavalier, Crobat, Mystery Energon, Gengar Spirit Link, and Kingler.
Gooper Blooper: >​mystery energon
Gooper Blooper: *sarah blechs in the distance*
Draco: =I

---

(Harpy is traveling by plane)

Kogasa: Landed in DC
Draco: Cool.
Gooper Blooper: harpy 4 prez
Kogasa: saw an outline of a dick when I was looking outside my window
Kogasa: up in the air
Draco: That's the Washington Monument.
Gooper Blooper: lel
Kogasa: I didn't know they let teenagers design the monument now

---

Draco: Next Pogeymon gen will have Mega Goodra. It just turns back into Goomy. BV

---

RubyChao: http://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/1688199
Gooper Blooper: imagining yuugi just casually strolling down the street holding a rock the size of a house with one arm
Gooper Blooper: "hey how ya doin" "..."
Breetannia: forget the rock, those are some huge stonkin tits
Tipsyleter: great big tonking stits

---

Gooper Blooper: reminder that old dinosaur books loved talking about how fuckin dumb dinosaurs were
Gooper Blooper: "The Diplodocus was nearly 90 feet long. It had a very small brain and was clumsy and stupid."
Draco: Old dinosaur experts had low self esteem and few outlets.
SteelKomodo: hahaha

---

Gooper Blooper: profiles updating, outdoor temperatures on the uptick, ZFRP is rumbling
Breetannia: that's just sarah's stomach
Gooper Blooper: that gave me a really stupid mental image
Gooper Blooper: Saralex in bed, sleeping, Alex awoken suddenly
Gooper Blooper: "Alex?" "What is it, Sarah?" "...I'm hungry, Alex."

Chatzy Madness Volume 182: My Client My Original Character Blidorah

Draco: Why is it I only now think to say "Harpy Birthday"?
Draco is shamed.

---

SteelKomodo: how goes it?
Harpy: its all good, although once i woke up, the internet shat itself
SteelKomodo: it was all like "OH SHIT HARPY'S AWAKE AAAAAAH D:"
Harpy: i can think of two other times the system went down
Harpy: one was during class
Harpy: the other was when I went shopping at the bookstore
Harpy: the biggest problem is that the school net is interconnected, powering everything
Harpy: if it shits itself, everything is down
Harpy: even the registers and the testing centers
Draco: And the dinosaur electric fences.
Harpy: and there's no alternative TO it that's good enough
SteelKomodo: D:
Harpy: yeah we're fucked when dinosaurs invade when the net is down
SteelKomodo: damn it dinosaurs
Draco: Good thing Jurassic Park State has a good nursing program.
Harpy: they took away our nursing program due to funding iirc
Harpy: those dinosaurs get a better education than I do
SteelKomodo: god damn it dinosaurs
SteelKomodo: why do you get better education than us humans

---

RubyChao: frands
Tableter: Fronds
Harpy: frappes

---

Tableter: HE
Harpy: HAS
Tableter: NO
SteelKomodo: STYLE
Tableter: HE
SteelKomodo: HAS
Tableter: NO
RubyChao: GRACE
SteelKomodo: THIS
Harpy: KONG
Tableter: HAS
SteelKomodo: A
Harpy: FUNNY
Tableter: FACE
Tableter: We did it gang
SteelKomodo: yaaaaaay
Tableter: We won the internet
SteelKomodo: :D
RubyChao: go us
SteelKomodo: walnuts peanuts etc.

Character Musings: Celestial Body

Before there was Buttsephine, there was Celestiass.

The literal Mother Of All Sarahkin has definitely been one of my more unique characters to play. Her origins are unique, too. One day in 2011, I was bored and doodled a female black mage in MS Paint with no specific plans for them in mind (I don't know why I gave said mage purple hair other than that it just felt right). Later, Alex visited Sarah's house, and I had the opportunity to develop Sarah's family (an opportunity I have milked for all it's worth :V). Originally Celestia, not Helios, was to be the deceased family member, but plans changed. I eventually wound up with her working for Tiamat as an elite guard with a specialty in mechanics. She was then fought, converted, and joined the kobbers as a semi-regular (reminder that Celestia was a villain goes here).

At first Celestia wasn't good for much besides constantly repairing the group's robots (especially Zephyrus, to the point it became a running gag), although she had a few cute moments with her daughters and told some embarrassing stories. Late in the first season, a few jokes about her attractiveness came up courtesy of Wall, but it wasn't a major deal.

Season 2 was the season Celestia came into her own as a real character, thanks in part to Dirk and his failed attempt at hooking up with her. It was here we firmly established the gag that Sarah's mom did, in fact, have it going on, particularly in the lower half. She also faced several other conflicts and challenges, from Sarah entering a game show to her family's nemesis Garland resurfacing and nearly killing her. Essentially, Celestia became a fully fleshed-out (no pun intended) and multifaceted character. She's a mechanic. She's a doting mother. She's a strategist. She's a great chef. She's ZFRP's Team Mom, always ready and eager to help with a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, and a warm cookie or twelve dozen.

Celestia holds a very rare distinction: she has never been killed in ZFRP. Considering she's been around since Season 1 and made regular appearances in every season but the third, that's saying a lot. She stayed out of trouble pretty frequently in Season 1, but she made numerous battlefield appearances in later seasons and just always managed to get away. It also helps that although she's entered several Fite Yer Mates matches, only one of them (vs Rafflesia) had lethal KOs as part of the equation, and it wasn't particularly likely to happen, either. Celestia just seems to have a knack for survival.

Celestia and Helios have a relationship that is very "sitcom parents"-esque, without the usual bitterness and hate. Helios tends to play straight man to Celestia's over-the-top inventions and bombastic business ventures. I knew it'd be likely Helios would be revived to rejoin the family if I dwelled on him too much, but I went ahead and did it anyway because I felt Season 2 and early Season 3 had wrung all the sadness out of Helios' death that I needed it to, so I might as well give the Sarahkin a happy ending. Of course, just like how "Final Fantasy" keeps churning out sequels despite the name, the Sarahkin's major plot arc coming to a close didn't mean a thing for their own appearances, and the whole group of them still regularly find ways to get involved in battles and plots.

Will Celestia appear in Las Vegas? I seem incapable of keeping the sarahkin out of RP, so probably, yeah. Will she do anything particularly important? Well, it's all about the hook. I'd need a good hook for Celestia to join in a major plot thread.

I may or may not already have said hook.

-----

SteelKomodo: ...oh, goops!
SteelKomodo: 60 posts in your blog are tagged with#Butts
Gooper Blooper: it's a butt milestone
SteelKomodo: and also the 60th post featured Celestia!
Gooper Blooper: oh god
Gooper Blooper: it's a sign
SteelKomodo: guess it's time to celebrate!
Gooper Blooper: celestia opens new vegas bakery, advertises with a banner saying "NOW WITH BIGGER BUNS THAN EVER"
SteelKomodo: hahaha
SteelKomodo: maybe add a "60th BUTT MILESTONE" in the post somewhere :U

thank

"So! *clap* What's everyone thankful for this year?"

"Why, my lovely wife, of course."

"Dirky~"

"Jo-Jo~"

"Stretch pants. Oof."

"...I might as well chip in with the required 'family'."

"I'm thankful for everybody!"

"Wonderful! And yes, I agree, Ariel. It's always important to remember family. Where would we be without each other?"

"Not filled with Ireland's entire stock of potatoes?"

"No, silly! Well, that too. Hope everyone has room for dessert!"

"Fuck."

"Oh boy!"

"BECAUSE THE DESSERT WAS A LOAF OF-

...

CELESTIA, THE DESSERT IS PIE."

"It's always pie!"

"YOU HAVE RUINED THIS UNIT'S JOKE. HOW COULD YOU."

"Skeiron, you can't even eat. Why are you here?"

"THIS UNIT IS THANKFUL."

Skeiron bowed his body, accidentally smacking the table in the process. "THANK."

"...Well, he's trying!"

Chatzy Madness Volume 135: Sexy Stories To Tell In The Dark

Draco: Why is Del always off to the movies? I come in and 9/10 times there's a "I'm going to the movies" message from Del. Does he have a.....social life? D:
SteelKomodo: yes :U

---

Harpy: i'm RPing a star that happens to act like kirby's mom
Harpy: i have found a new way to fuck up in RP
Harpy: A NEW HEIGHT

---

Cornwind Evil: Obviously we need to have ANOTHER GIANT PUNCH UP IN THE MALL
SteelKomodo: no we don't :I
RubyChao: of course! that's genius!
RubyChao has a character set up a new store, called Giant Punch
RubyChao: (it's a boxing gym)
Cornwind Evil: In any case, I must go do some RL stuff
RubyChao: seeya cw
Cornwind Evil: So I'll be back later
Cornwind Evil: AND THEN WE HAVE A HUGE BRAWL IN THE MALL
SteelKomodo: NO >:I

---

SteelKomodo: I got nothin
Gooper Blooper: ZFRPLadiesNight.txt
SteelKomodo: goops pls
SteelKomodo: most likely the Succubi started it off :U

---

Gooper Blooper: everyone loves Celestia's buns
Gooper Blooper: they flock to see them
Harpy: Kirby loves her love muffins
Gooper Blooper: they're spongy

---

Harpy: JO-JO-JOSEPHINE, ARDEA'S GREATEST LOVE MACHINE
Gooper Blooper: it's not a bubble butt, it's a gas tank for a love machine
iKomodo: Editing for- Goops pls

Chatzy Madness Volume 132: Botwoon Edition

RubyChao: can i just say i kind of like how quickly philander jumped in being a bad guy :V
RubyChao: like he went from asshole to murderous asshole to murderer asshole to superpowered murderer asshole in what
RubyChao: 4 days?
SteelKomodo: yeah, that was a bit quick for me
SteelKomodo: I was gonna space it out more but CW was like "DUDE WE GOTTA DO THIS"
SteelKomodo: and I was like "oh ok"
SteelKomodo: I didn't even plan for him to have lying powers :U
RubyChao: well it will be helpful with keeping him around for longer
RubyChao: *The expedition finds him standing over a dead guy holding a blood covered knife* "Did you kill him?" "No." "Okay!"
Draco: "Well, cheerio then! We're off to get our ability to discern truth from lies fixed!"
SteelKomodo: XD

---

Kirby: trying to resist the urge to jump into conradplot with the most adorable puff ever that would kill any and all seriousness
RubyChao: throw the kirby at the bbbbp instead
RubyChao: problem solved
RubyChao: eventually i'm just going to go out of control with that acronym
RubyChao: bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbp

---

Gooper Blooper: >​Rusty's Real Deal Microtransactions sneaks onto my 3DS during Pokemon Bank usage
10 Things That Arent John Cena: D: Goops did you catch the Rusty virus too
Gooper Blooper: For like three seconds, Spy
Gooper Blooper: It asked if I wanted to download and I said no
Gooper Blooper: So it said "so you don't mind if we get rid of this icon"
Gooper Blooper: and away it went
10 Things That Arent John Cena: It'll be back
10 Things That Arent John Cena: 3DS update
10 Things That Arent John Cena: Rusty's Real Deal Baseball
10 Things That Arent John Cena: Go to your Miis
10 Things That Arent John Cena: Rusty's bumming on the couch
10 Things That Arent John Cena: Start up Pokemon. New mystery gift. It's Rusty
Gooper Blooper: microtransactions final boss 2014

---

RubyChao: posted.
RubyChao: why did i add that period
RubyChao: now it looks odd somehow

Chatzy Madness Volume 131: Greetings, Assembled Bitches

(SK is playing Pokemon)

SteelKomodo: A QUAGSIRE
SteelKomodo: WHAT DO
Draco: Peace treaty.

---

Del MK 2.0: aeiounauts have arrived
SlowKomodo: oh lawd
SlowKomodo: now Dirk really can't tell 'em it's made of bugs
RubyChao: bar post
RubyChao: "pit i fed your girlfriend bug burgers" "you bastard"
SlowKomodo: XD
SlowKomodo: I'm tempted to call em buggers, but then that'd be a whole other can of worms :U

---

iKomodo: So goops
iKomodo: now you know why I keep saying Philander is a dick
iKomodo: :U
Gooper Blooper: the most emphatic proof of dickery I've yet seen this year!
Gooper Blooper: and you know what we do with dicks
iKomodo: We kill em
Gooper Blooper: I was gonna say something like "we cut them down to size" or "we circumcise em" because lel genitals but that works too!
iKomodo: Lolz

---

iKomodo: >​is typing "Hang onto your britches, Jo"
iKomodo: >​accidentally types "bitches" instead
iKomodo: WHAT HAVE I DONE
iKomodo: *shoots self*
Draco: Josephin' ain't easy. BV
Del MK 2.0: pimpsephine
RubyChao: "pimpin' ain't easy but it is profitable"
RubyChao: *josephine reclines on a throne of money*