Jumpropeman: http://i.imgur.com/kVG60cH.jpg
---
Del: we've found a racist cave
Del: it won't let skeletons in
Del: or minotaurs
Saberwulf: Picket it
SteelKomodo: with picket signs
Saberwulf: Refuse to give up your seat on the river boat
Cornwind Evil: But it let in the girl with blonde hair and blue eyes
SteelKomodo: that is a ham-handed reference if ever I saw one, CW :U
Del: a racist lecherous cave
Cornwind Evil: It's actually because it was warded with time-based protection and the girl had time powers so the wards ignored her
Draco: It let in Sailor Moon? =D
---
RubyChao: ""I’m Gonna Be A Star" is the fan-derived title of the first song of the second episode of the second season of Donkey Kong Country. This musical number delves deep into many themes, such as how our culture perceives fame and fortune to be the definition of success. And yet, despite the fact that television exists in a world full of talking apes, the movie they star in is only ever screened to the actors themselves, which raises a good question: Just how would they become famous? On an island which only has less than 20 inhabitants DK, Cranky, and Diddy are already well known by everyone, including their mortal enemies. Perhaps this implies the existence of further worlds outside of Kongo Bongo in the Donkey Kong Country universe, but unfortunately the show failed to expand upon this lore before it was ultimately cancelled, leading to much speculation among the fans."
---
RubyChao: oh yes goops were you here when i mentioned what game the escape tourian/pirate mothership theme was remixed for
RubyChao: it was remixed into metroid prime 2 as the theme for when you're escaping dark aether after killing emperor ing (and fighting dark samus)
Gooper Blooper: gotta escape before it blows up brother
Gooper Blooper: the marks need that escape sequence
RubyChao: fun fact in that one samus actually sort-of causes it to blow up for a change
RubyChao: rather than just "well shit i didn't mean for zebes to go kaboom"
Gooper Blooper: things just happen to explode around samus
Gooper Blooper: In retrospect, maybe teaming her with Okuu wasn't such a great idea
SteelKomodo: Pfffft
RubyChao: there's a reason the space pirate ship in the Ridleyplot blew up
SteelKomodo: Okuu pls
RubyChao: spoiler alert: any pirate bases visited in 2014 have a ~99% chance of exploding post-plot
SteelKomodo: lel
Gooper Blooper: I'd be disappointed if they didn't!
RubyChao: an evil planet is located near ardea
RubyChao: the kobber solution is to send samus, reasoning that planets have a high chance of exploding when she visits them
Gooper Blooper: If Samus had been around in 2011 the Rafflesia fight may have gone very differently
---
Gooper Blooper: I THINK SHE'S THROUGH PLAYING AROUND
RubyChao: AHAHHAHA THE UNDERGROUND MAZE
Gooper Blooper: BIG TOUGH MAZE
Gooper Blooper: the zelda fight is even better
RubyChao: it is
RubyChao: you know when i first played melee i didn't get why they had the Escape from Brinstar sequence
RubyChao: (now i do)
Gooper Blooper: EVEN IN SMASH BROS IT'S REQUIRED
Gooper Blooper: All of this stuff is Samus training for Year 4 to prove she's not a jobber
RubyChao: "So what did you do during the offseason?" "Killed the space pirates several times, speedran a few things, blew up a couple planets. You?" "Uhhh... trained with Yuugi. (I feel like I should have done more)"
Gooper Blooper: "I read a lot of books." "Dirk took me out to dinner."
#FreeTheDee: . . . What just happened to Zelda
Gooper Blooper: Zelda was firmly introduced to her place in the Nintendo Girls pecking order
RubyChao: "there's a reason you're the damsel and i'm the hero, zelda"
---
RubyChao: "Tohjo (literally Johto with the syllables reversed) Falls"
RubyChao: i did not get this for the past 13 years
RubyChao: GJ me
---
Gooper Blooper: My favorite part is the "plus 1.97 shipping"
RubyChao: somehow i don't think the game is worth THAT much
SteelKomodo: Wat
---
Jumpropeman: t-minus 18 days to ZFRP
Jumpropeman: do YOU know where your character will be that day?
Harpy: Carlos will be on the ZFS, brewing coffee and making pastries
RubyChao: utsuho will mysteriously appear through a gap!
Cornwind Evil: Sine: Utsuho, how did you get into my laundry chute!?
RubyChao: Utsuho: Don't blame me, I didn't know it'd lead here...
Cornwind Evil: Sine:...and why are you wearing my sweater.
RubyChao: Utsuho: It's comfortable! :D
Harpy: it FITS
Harpy: she says its comfortable but her wings are kind of
Harpy: stuck
Harpy: unless her wings are where the arms go and her arms are out where her head goes
RubyChao: nah it just hikes up really far in back
#FreeTheDee: Wingholes yo
#FreeTheDee: May be uneven due to being cut by scissors
Jumpropeman: I like to imagine Sine getting it back and just having a huge drooping back to the sweater because of how far it stretched out
Cornwind Evil: Sine: *sighs*
---
(Cornwind is playing Pokemon Diamond)
Cornwind Evil: Well I just entered a Contest and somehow won despite having no idea what I was doing
---
RubyChao: night peeps
Harpy: i am not a marshmallow bird
Harpy: how dare you
RubyChao: yes you are
RubyChao proves it by taking a bite out of harpy
Harpy: AAAAAA
Harpy: ME ARM
---
Jumpropeman: So ends my playthrough of FTL as the ZFS King of Beasts. With its crew of Jumpropeman, Tut-Tut, Whitey, Reject, Q, and Theodore Rex, we unfortunately met our end. Theodore was the first to die, dying when he got hit directly by a missile in a low oxygen room he was trying to repair. We did fairly well without him, but ultimately a group of Mantises killed us. WIDOW MAKERRRRRRR!!!!
Jumpropeman: The mission of the Poseidon fared much better. Captained by Red Spy, he, Zephyrus, and Oceanus set off into the galaxy. Joining them along the way were Meat Boy and 17 as well as a couple of unmanned drones that proved very helpful. Oceanus was almost lost along the way, infected with a virus that seemed to kill him but instead made him much stronger. 17 became pretty useless when Meat Boy joined the crew, but this rag tag gang made it all the way to the final boss before they were destroyed.
---
Draco joined the chat
RubyChao joined the chat
Harpy: hi you too
Harpy: *two
Draco: I didn't say hi yet, Harpy.
Draco: Hello, Harpy!
Harpy: hi draco
Harpy: you must hi more
Harpy: :I
RubyChao: hi harpy/draco
Draco: Hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi.
Harpy: now I can say
Harpy: I think you're too hi
Draco: I don't think you're hi enough.
Harpy: :I
---
RubyChao: "ProJared was an evil being who wanted all the competition out of the way so he could be the best game reviewer of Youtube. In the background I saw the dead bodies of PeanutButterGamer, Jontron, The Completionist, Angry Joe and even the Angry Video Game Nerd,"
Harpy: wait is this a youtube creepypasta
Harpy: hahahaha
RubyChao: yes
RubyChao: ""But how can that be?" I thought to myself because its not like they're inactive or anything...but then it hit me. "What if he kills them and then makes copies of them so no one will notice." I said to myself."
Harpy: gl trying to beat out several- uh the quality of videos would
Harpy: drop
RubyChao: BUT THEY'RE CLONES, HARPY
RubyChao: NO ONE WILL NOTICE
Harpy: but
Harpy: wouldn't that defeat the purpose of being the best game reviewer
Harpy: because the clones are there
RubyChao: probably, yes
Harpy: and the clones are better
Harpy: this guy does not know how to logic out his evil schemes
Harpy: E for effort
Draco: A Youtuber! I'll steal it! NOONE WILL EVER KNOW!
---
Harpy: *looks at junk mail*
Harpy: uh
Del: hm
Del: both of those are related somehow
Del: david tennants left eyebrow can enlarge your penis
Del: regardless of if you actually have one
RubyChao: now that's talent
Harpy: i rather not have a dong; i am a girl
Del: the dong squad does not discriminate based on gender
---
RubyChao: okuu discovers how to convince pit to do things in 2014
SteelKomodo: "Um, Okuu... You're a little close..."
---
Del: its a full moon here
Del: i used to be a werewolf you know
Del: but i'm alright nooOOOOOOWWWWWW
Del changed name to WereDel
WereDel: damn it
---
Saberwulf: Yo Del, did you see that trailer for the new civ game?
WereDel: wat
Saberwulf: Yeah, they're making a new alpha centauri
WereDel: "new alpha centauri"
WereDel hyperventilates
Saberwulf joins in the hyperventilation
WereDel: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Gooper Blooper: del intensifies
WereDel intensifies
Saberwulf: The article links to some screens, too
Saberwulf: It looks exactly what you'd think AC in the Civ 5 engine would be
WereDel: the screeeeeeeenssssss
WereDel: giant woooooorms
---
RubyChao: EVERY FULL MOON, SABERWULF TURNS INTO...
RubyChao: A DAVID
---
Saberwulf: Man, I can't wait for my paycheck
Saberwulf: Getting a pic of Zoe commissioned and whatever's left over is going into the tattoo fund
Gooper Blooper: oh cool
Saberwulf: Gonna be an asshole and get a full sleeve done for no reason
GB: can't find concept art? I'LL COMMISSION ONE SHE'S ONE OF A KIND I'M WULF MCMAHON GOD DAMMIT
Saberwulf: GOTTA GET THE DETAIL RIGHT
---
Jumpropeman: I live in texas and I don't like bbq
Jumpropeman: I'm a traitor to my people
Harpy: jrm
Harpy: you are welcome here
Tableter: Del disapproves
SteelKomodo: So does SK
Harpy: britbros i will fite you to protect jrm
Tableter: No bbq = Not texan enough
Jumpropeman: hey, I've got decent excuses for not liking it >:I
Tableter: I will fight you both
Harpy: i'll push you off the bay bridge
Jumpropeman: *stays far away from any staircases*
Tableter: Damn upstart colony, drink your goddamn tea
Tableter: >=I
Jumpropeman: *doesn't like tea either*
Tableter: DRINK IT
Harpy: I like tea
Harpy: But I have no sugar.
Cornwind Evil: Here, allow me JRM
Jumpropeman: D:
Cornwind Evil falls down a staircase in JRM's place.
Jumpropeman: oh, that's a nice change of pace
SteelKomodo: BAH GAWD KANG
SteelKomodo: CW TAKIN THE BULLET FOR JRM
Cornwind Evil: OW THIS IS HORRIBLE AND PAINFUL
Cornwind Evil: IS THIS WHAT I'VE BEEN DOING FOR SO LONG
Cornwind Evil: I'M A MONSTER
Cornwind Evil goes to jail where he belongs.
Harpy: CW then goes to hell
Harpy: where his punishment is to fall down an infinite staircase
Cornwind Evil: And I know you're mimicking JR's accent, but every time someone says Kang I picture the Simpsons alien calling WWE matches.
---
Cornwind Evil: This trainer has nothing but beavers
Harpy: those would be called bidoofs
Jumpropeman: welcome to sinnoh: population: bidoof
---
Jumpropeman: I'm pretty sure Harpy's tombstone will just say
Harpy Kuro
1992-20XX
welp
SteelKomodo: pfffft
Harpy: *1993
Harpy: my tombstone will read "some jerkass put the wrong date on this didn't they"
Jumpropeman: I thought women always wanted people to think they are older than they actually are
SteelKomodo: lolz
Harpy: :U
---
Harpy: something about this heat is making my head hurt
Jumpropeman: make sure to take the appropriate drugs to feel better
(later)
RubyChao: i have a really bad headache today
Harpy: ouch
Jumpropeman: take some drugs
Jumpropeman: i'm such a freaking pusher
---
Jumpropeman: there's one spammer who keeps insisting they are a girl named Adriana and met me on facebook
Jumpropeman: It's funny because I have a friend on facebook named Adriana who is asexual and super shy
Jumpropeman: "I'm Diplomatic Agent Mr. Henry Williams , I have been trying to reach you on
your Email about couple of days now, just to inform you about my successful
arrival in South San Francisco International Airport California, with your ATM
VISA CARD. Which I have been instructed by D.H.L COURIER DELIVERY
COMPANY to be delivered to your home address. The Airport Authority demanded for all
the legal back up papers to prove to them that the ATM VISA CARD ready delivery, I have
presented the papers I handed to them and they are very much pleased with the
papers I presented but the only thing that is still keeping me here is the
airport custom yellow tag and International Clearance Permit certificate. Which
is not placed on the package, one of the Airport Authority has advice that we
get the custom yellow tag and International Delivery Permit certificate which cost $89.
Regard
DIPLOMATIC. Henry Williams"
Jumpropeman: he's asking for a very reasonable amount, considering all these african banks want money in the hundreds or thousands from me
Harpy: diplomatically, at that
Jumpropeman: "How are you sexy?
Its me Adriana you remember me from Facebook? I saw your pictures today and you're CUTE!
Imagine me giving you a massage and later a blow job, you would love it. Wouldn’t you?
Get dirty with me Hun.
xoxo
Adriana"
Harpy: oh baby
SteelKomodo: jrm pls
Harpy: if that's the same one sending me junk mail, I think she'd find it difficult to give me a blowjob
Harpy: i'm so sorry but i lack a dong
Jumpropeman: her lack of a comma in the first question makes it seem like a bit of a rude question
Jumpropeman: How are YOU sexy? I'm just not seeing it
Harpy: ...just noticed
Harpy: oh my god
Harpy: hillarious
Harpy: that's not my email, how the hell did I get this
---
(Chatzy goes offline for a while, so everyone in it wanders off and isn't around when it returns)
Gooper Jobber joined the chat
Gooper Jobber: I tried to get into chatzy for half an hour and I finally got in and everyone's dead
Gooper Jobber: it's the post-apocalyptic chatzy
Gooper Jobber: Spy is still here because he was marked as away for so long he missed the whole thing
Gooper Jobber: like that one guy who sleeps through armageddon
---
Draco: I'm kind of glad I missed Goops. Dude's always going on about his wrasslin' vidya games and his baloney roll-up recipe.
Gooper Jobber joined the chat
Draco: D=
Draco slowly backs away.
---
Gooper Jobber: I mentioned yesterday I wanted to go back and see if Mother Brain was REALLY that bad on Hard in Zero Mission
RubyChao: was she?
Gooper Jobber: Well, before I did anything else, I went back and got 2 missile upgrades, 1 super missile upgrade, and an energy tank
Gooper Jobber: I have the maximum amount of health possible to have at this point in the game
Gooper Jobber: Then I went for the brain
Gooper Jobber: Attempt 1: Failed to break glass, jobbed
Gooper Jobber: Attempt 2: Failed to break glass, jobbed
Gooper Jobber: Attempt 3: Broke glass, jobbed
RubyChao: samus pls
Gooper Jobber: Attempt 4: Broke glass, damaged Mother Brain once, jobbed
Gooper Jobber: Attempt 5: Looked up the boss fight on GameFAQs and found there's one spot where you're relatively safe
Gooper Jobber: If you hang off of the right side of the left block, the turrets can't hit you and you can shoot the red rings
RubyChao: useful to know!
RubyChao: but did she job anyway
Gooper Jobber: Using this technique, Samus very, very slowly whittled down the glass and broke it, then got back to full health via pickups from the rings
Gooper Jobber: She then took three hits and jobbed
RubyChao: SAMUS PLS
---
RubyChao: pixiv why do you tell me i have 658 bookmarks when i only have 656
RubyChao: you're ruining my pendanticness
Gooper Jobber: It got a little confused after the 140th utsuho
---
Gooper Jobber: I can't believe this picture exists but there it is anyway
RubyChao: I look forward to Gloria vs. Beetle in 2014
RubyChao: you can do it goops
RubyChao: i know you can work it into PR
RubyChao: *RP
Gooper Jobber: My Public Relations department keeps the peace between my characters
Gooper Jobber: Gloria showed up getting huffy about Rhino Beetle
#FreeTheDee: Poor Rhino Beetle, so overshadowed by Stag Beetle
---
RubyChao: so goops how goes your sarahrpg
RubyChao: *SaRahPG
RubyChao: *SARAH'S QUEST FOR THE HOLY PLATE
RubyChao: there now i don't need to worry about capitalization
#FreeTheDee: SaRah PG
#FreeTheDee: Zeph and Sarah must keep the bar nice and clean
Gooper Jobber: Sarah always keeps things PG
RubyChao: the sequel is Drunksephine PG-13
RubyChao: To Sarah's shame
RubyChao: (It's PG-13 because Dirk is a main character)
#FreeTheDee: Would the second sequel be R-iel
#FreeTheDee: In which Ariel gets an edgy reboot and commits acts of ecoterror
RubyChao: the final boss fight involves blowing up mr. x's headquarters with all his goons inside
Gooper Jobber: planet's dyin, josephine
Gooper Jobber: Gloria AO
#FreeTheDee: Nah Goops, Glori-AO
RubyChao: gloria no that's not what they meant by get out more
RubyChao: gloria pls
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