Gooper Blooper: they're gonna sit the robot at the desk and he'll wave at everyone
RubyChao: well hey, Robot was designed for that, after all
Orrie Cather: ive been RPing machines that help old people
Orrie Cather: and now one takes my job
Orrie Cather: not sure if that's irony
---
RubyChao: "Its title character is a young woman named Skye who lives in a fantasy realm searching for her mother. She does not use firearms, but can perform magic using Skittles candies, as well as use her staff as a melee weapon, though it also becomes an energy weapon when used in conjunction with the Skittles."
RubyChao: ah, product placement
Gooper Blooper: SKITTLES
RubyChao: "A 300-page script, by lead writer and designer Andy Wolfendon, was written and submitted to Mars, which only asked to change a joke, utterances of "damn" and "remove all the snakes from the game." When Braswell asked for clarification, they said that there could be snake-like creatures, but no actual snakes."
Gooper Blooper: That's a weird one. I guess they just hate snakes
BEFRIEND CLEFFA: skittles!
RubyChao: fun fact
RubyChao: skittles removing lime was one of the greatest betrayals in maria's life
BEFRIEND CLEFFA: it is the biggest betrayal of my life
BEFRIEND CLEFFA: and i will never forgive them for it
BEFRIEND CLEFFA: i will gorge on kit kats instead :I
Draco: Lime was a good Skittle.
RubyChao: not the best tho
RubyChao: that will always be grape
Draco: True facts
---
Draco: "I would like a Brgrgr with a side of personal space, please. ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )" is still my favorite line.
Gooper Blooper: edea was very excited okay
Draco: It's a shame Edea left for Eternia. Parsee was going to order more Brgrgrs in the off-season.
Draco: ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )
Gooper Blooper: noooo
Draco: Fortunately Stacy is the best chef ever.
---
Orrie Cather: •The Drevlians sent twenty of their best men to persuade Olga of Kiev, whose husband they had killed, to marry their Prince Mal and give up her rule of Kievan Rus. She had them buried alive.
•Then she sent word to Prince Mal that she accepted the proposal, but required their most distinguished men to accompany her on the journey in order for her people to accept the offer of marriage. Upon their arrival, she offered them a warm welcome and an invitation to clean up after their long journey in a bathhouse. After they entered, she locked the doors and set fire to the building, burning them alive.
•With the best and wisest men out of the way, she planned to destroy the remaining Drevlians. She invited them to a funeral feast so she could mourn over her husband's grave, where her servants waited on them. After the Drevlians were drunk, Olga's soldiers killed over 5,000 of them.
•The Drevlians begged for mercy and offered to pay for their freedom with honey and furs. She asked for three pigeons and three sparrows from each house, since she did not want to burden the villagers any further after the siege. Olga gave to each soldier in her army a pigeon or a sparrow, and ordered them to attach by thread to each pigeon and sparrow a piece of sulfur bound with small pieces of cloth. The birds flew to their nests, the pigeons to the cotes, and the sparrows under the eaves. The dove-cotes, the coops, the porches, and the haymows were set on fire. There was not a house that was not consumed, and it was impossible to extinguish the flames, because all the houses caught on fire at once.
•The people fled from the city, and Olga ordered her soldiers to catch them. Thus she took the city and burned it, and captured the elders of the city. Some of the other captives she killed, while some she gave to others as slaves to her followers.
Orrie Cather: too bad Cornwind's gone
Orrie Cather: I think I found his dream girl
SteelKomodo: hahahaha
Orrie Cather: also: Olga of Kiev... was made a saint
---
More Sheep: "And I don't think... Okay, I know it's going to sound bad, but we've had chance after chance to kill Sonic Man! I don't think it's happening!"
More Sheep: My God
More Sheep: THE EMPEROR IS NAKED!
---
RubyChao: brb
RubyChao: bread
Bad Carrot: good reason to leave
---
RubyChao: befitting our next season AND my rp
RubyChao: chaomom is watching a film that can be summed up as "Elvis in Hawaii"
Detective Dick Justice: Didn't he make a film set in Hawaii?
RubyChao: yep
RubyChao: Blue Hawaii, which is the one that she's watching
Draco: Chaomom is a cool dudette.
Detective Dick Justice: A funny story about Elvis
Detective Dick Justice: After making a bunch of bad films, he wanted to try and actually ACT
Detective Dick Justice: So he was looking for a role
Detective Dick Justice: And his agent offered him one of the lead roles of Midnight Cowboy
Detective Dick Justice: Which is a classic film but had some very heavy subject matter for the times
Detective Dick Justice: So much so that it was originally rated X, before that rating became solely the purview of porn
Detective Dick Justice: Elvis was uncertain about the film's content, and hence decided instead to make a film called "Change of Habit"
Detective Dick Justice: ....bad choice, in the end. He never acted again, while Midnight Cowboy received critical acclaim and Oscars.
Detective Dick Justice: Oh yeah, and it was deemed "culturally, historically or aesthetically significant" by the Library of Congress and selected for preservation in the United States National Film Registry in 1994
---
More Sheep: "You called me a child after all, but... sometimes when people get so old, see so much, they stop seeing new things. They've made up their mind about everything, and they forget to be open, to make new mistakes and admit they messed up."
More Sheep: It's almost like
More Sheep: this writer has spent some significant time around the elderly...
Fritz Brenner: you know what they say. "Jumpropeman! That guy has spent some significant time around the elderly!"
Phone: Alright, alright, you got me. I'm so embittered at comics all the time because I've been Alan Moore this whole time, drinking blood to rejuvenate my ill spent yoith while nothing could ease the age or ache of mind...
RubyChao: gasp!!!
Draco: I don't believe it. :O
Phone: You shouldn't! 89
Draco: I know. I DON'T believe it. BI
Draco gets out a rolled-up newspaper.
Fritz Brenner: *googles Alan Moore, finds a nice collection of his stories on amazon*
Fritz Brenner: Paperback price: 12.95. Hardcover: 224.02
Fritz Brenner: Decisions... decisions..
More Sheep: "You don't HAVE to help people, Mr. Erdrick"
More Sheep: BAD END
More Sheep: 1,000 Years of Aggieplot
Phone: Sadly, we didn't explore the morals of the dark mirror conjugations equaling the soul of a dead horse harnessed to the will of a mage who stopped being the mage she knew in life.
More Sheep: Ven, why must you crush my dreams
Phone: Because I use the powder for my tea, Sheep, and the facts linger...
More Sheep: oh well, facts then; didn't know we'd started keeping those in stock
More Sheep: I was under the impression they were out of season
Draco: Oh sure, confuse the issue with facts, why don't you?
More Sheep: "But only a heartless fool would let them do something that could completely ruin their lives if it means they might learn some small lesson!"
More Sheep: To be fair
More Sheep: I'm sure it'd be a LARGE lesson
Draco: Compared to how famous her parents are and all the stuff THEY'VE done, this IS small.
RubyChao: ash revived ONE supervillain
Phone: They were always here, just put aside.
More Sheep: So what you're saying is
More Sheep: you need
More Sheep: nay
More Sheep: DEMAND
More Sheep: Aggie in Strangvia
Brinehammer careens through the door, falls on face.
Brinehammer: Yes.
Gooper Blooper: Aggie in New Strangvia, located on the scenic shores of Henders Island and site of the new Twisted Metal tournament
RubyChao: hi brine
Draco gives Brine a 7/10.
Phone: Successions of bullets to the cerebral cortex is somewhat preferable, thank you anyway.
Fritz Brenner: Brine is just in time to save us from Aggie in Strangvia
Draco introduces Magnus De Levouse-Mizuhashi next year.
More Sheep: No one is safe is from Aggie in Strangvia
More Sheep turns key and open hatch to reveal a large, conspicuous button labeled 'JUNKO IN STRANGVIA'
Draco: Junko's gonna win the Brawl.
Fritz Brenner: I thought that's where she was now
Fritz Brenner: guzzling the mutant cure and high-fiving the Mother
More Sheep: Junko's high-fiving herself?!
Brinehammer: Junko's not anywhere; she's in your heart, like Halloween.
Fritz Brenner: that explains why I bleed rubber spiders and candy corn at least
Draco: High-fiving yourself is called "clapping", JRM.
---
B.C.: Sup
SteelKomodo: not much
SteelKomodo: got a lot of shredding to do soon
Fritz Brenner: im sure that's for papers or something, but it sounds like you're about to head off to do some gnarly skateboarding
B.C.: He isnt?
Fritz Brenner: Steel KOOLmodo
SteelKomodo: i wish :<
---
Draco: Are we sure it's the Gorillaz and not just four gorillas?
iKomodo: Yeah, we're sure
Draco: Just checking.
---
Draco: Harpy's doing another AMA and we just found out that Brandon can't do sick motorcycle stuff.
Bed Cozy: look man
Bed Cozy: that's stacy's job
Bed Cozy: stacy is the cute fat person doing motorcycle stunts in the middle of vegas
Bed Cozy: brandon is the cute fat person who would pass for a grandma if all someone knew was his hobbies and his initials
Draco: Well, we already know Parsee can't match Stacy in terms of motorcycles, stunts, or burgers, but she does hold the edge in danmaku, flying, and doing taxes.
Bed Cozy: stacy bad at taxes confirmed
Bed Cozy: brandon is very good at taxes
Draco: I had a dumb, non-canon idea earlier: Brandon goes to new KoB, almost says he's hungry, but someone slaps a hand over his mouth. "Don't say the 'h'-word. There's, like, five or six team moms around here who will descend upon you like reverse-zombies if they hear that word." Brandon is handed a sandwich. "Pretend to eat this sandwich - AND ONLY PRETEND 'CAUSE THAT'S MY SANDWICH - and act like you're full until the danger passes."
Bed Cozy: im pretty sure that's going to be canon now
Bed Cozy: only Brandon says it anyway because he wants to see what happens
Draco: And Widow Maker dives for cover.
Draco: Because suddenly Stacy, Celestia, Edea, and Gran appear with bowls of spaghetti or something idunno
---
Mira Holt: lately ive been waking up with one of my arms asleep, which is concerning because I'm not sure if that means the circulation to that arm is getting cut off for six hours or what
Draco: Is it the arm you use to hit the Snooze button? Or does it hit the Snooze on its own?
Mira Holt: I have no snooze button, I impose on friends and family to call my phone as my alarm
---
RubyChao: by the way, i've been playing shovel knight now that DR1 is done
RubyChao: one thing i like about the order of no quarter
RubyChao: they've all got common design elements (as does shovel knight) but they're all very distinct as well
RubyChao: it gives me a lot of robot master memories :V
Mira Holt: although clearly based on Robot Masters, I think they do a better job of diversifying and having personality
Mira Holt: without Spy, I couldn't ascribe much personality to most Robot Masters besides ANGRYKILLMEGAMAN
Mira Holt: although if I tried to tell someone outside the community about Needle Man being willing to sacrifice his life for the greater good, they might get confused
RubyChao: hahahahaha
RubyChao: or that Bubble Man's most known tendency is a desire to punch enemies in their face
Gooper Blooper: Well, the Order have a pretty major advantage over robot masters
Gooper Blooper: they get dialogue
Gooper Blooper: I mean with
Mira Holt: im fairly sure we'll see some Shovel Knight in 2017 at this rate :V
Gooper Blooper: I have a plan for something
Gooper Blooper: it's a little different from anything I've done before
RubyChao: it's... a major character who's a dude!!!
Gooper Blooper: GASP
Mira Holt: let's not get TOO crazy here
Gooper Blooper: I'll have you know I RP as both genders: female and robot/golem
Mira Holt: Our disproportionate level of lesbian relationships is clearly a side effect of too little available dudes
RubyChao: i'll just have to fix that
RubyChao looks menacingly at his roster
Mira Holt: *rps more shapes*
Mira Holt: the trapezoid remains an untapped goldmine!
Mira Holt: don't worry Chao, ladies will be lining up for the Chuckster ;D
Gooper Blooper: For whatever reason, I just gravitate towards female leads, and when I'm not doing female leads I'm experimenting with unconventional character types like monsters and battlebots
RubyChao: makes sense
RubyChao: meanwhile i just kinda RP whatever comes to mind
RubyChao: even if it's just a reporter, a robot, and a super mario sunshine reference
Draco: I tried a male lead, but he got too popular and awesome so I had to retire him.
RubyChao: alas, poor draco
Mira Holt: alas, poor Waldorf- oh draco, of course
Draco: Actually, alas poor Zett, haunted wood baron.
Draco: (b^_^)b
Mira Holt: *looks at my 2017 cast* while Keahi is undeniably the hotness, the other options appear to be Hurley or Harth
Draco: Hurley: women want him and men want to be him.
Gooper Blooper: All the ladies want Sunwoop
RubyChao: who wouldn't admire his orphanage burning?
Draco: Floatzelplot when?
Gooper Blooper: Fifty posts of Floatzel's skeleton lying there
RubyChao: no, no
RubyChao: he's rebuilt and resurrected as Meta Floatzel
RubyChao: challenges the kobbers
RubyChao: dies in one hit
Draco rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 4
Draco: Parsee challenges Floatzel.
Mira Holt: then comes Ultra Floatzel, Floatzel's Skull, and finally, Flidley, the unholy fusion of the two
---
Mira Holt: my work is doing that subtle site blocking now
Mira Holt: it just says "This site cannot be displayed" instead of BLOCKED FOR HOT PORNO
---
Gooper Blooper: http://chainsawsuit.com/comic/2017/01/12/yearnout/
RubyChao: the downside to format wars
RubyChao: "I'm so old, I remember back before nostalgia. Let me tell you, those were the days."
Draco: "Back in my day, there was nothing to remember! We hadn't done anything yet, hadn't said anything yet, hadn't even existed yet!"
Mira Holt: "Back in my day, they didn't allow day ownership! When they started to ease off on that, I bought up as many as I could! Those were THE days!"
---
Draco: My Brawl Lotto entry
RubyChao: that was... surprisingly straightforward for family guy
Draco: It's many years old.
Gooper Blooper: Strengths: Completely invulnerable to damage
Gooper Blooper: Weaknesses: But only if his sneakers are on
Draco nods sagely. "We didn't need Zeldoten to return. This guy deserves that champion space more."
---
Del: SK is wrong and Ex-Aid owns
Del: Hi BC
SteelKomodo: i also think you are wrong
SteelKomodo: and Ex-Aid is good but not that great
Del: Ur not that great
Del: 😠
Draco: 😲
SteelKomodo: 😠
Del: I hate emojis a lot
---
Draco: I should write a blogpost featuring everyone's favorite character, Zook.
---
Dark Annie: Okay
Dark Annie: Who here has had to use, or used the easy mode, on games they played?
Bed Cozy: all the time on touhou
RubyChao: i have
Gooper Blooper: I frequently roll on easy modo
Gooper Blooper: Generally I only bump the difficulty up when easy is either insultingly easy or they block off part of the game from you if you play on easy
Bed Cozy: i play normal unless its too hard
Jumpropeman: rarely, can't remember specific examples, but I usually go down the Normal path
RubyChao: same as harpy, generally
RubyChao: although in some 2hu games i've rolled with normal because easy blocks off stuff
ivel: I usually play Normal as well
Draco: I like playing on Normal.
Bed Cozy: i play easy on 2hu games that don't fuck you over for 1cc on easy
Bed Cozy: aka all the good games
Bed Cozy: that aren't terrifying
Jumpropeman: i played Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare on hard, cockily thinking that I was skilled enough at FPS and having heard rumors of COD having easy single player
ivel: I have played on Plague Inc. Evolved on Easy just to unlock some stuff
ivel: jrm plz
Jumpropeman: of course, I played Barney Hide and Seek on its highest difficulty: Barney Must Die
ivel: incidentally, that's also the name of the hardest difficulty of the Flintstones video game
Gooper Blooper: pff
Dark Annie: All right. So there was a SNES game Tiny Toon Adventures, Buster Busts Loose.
Dark Annie: Now, considering the source material, you'd probably assume lots of young kids would play it
Dark Annie: And hence it should have an easy mode, which it did
Dark Annie: But as I was recently reviewing it, the Easy Mode is....strangely insulting
Dark Annie: If you play on Easy, some of the changes are obvious. You have more life, more lives, and one of your moves does damage that doesn't do damage if you play on any other mode
Dark Annie: So you get to the end of the first level on Easy and....you don't fight the boss
Dark Annie: You just go to the next level
Dark Annie: You get to a point where a villain has stolen a bunch of stuff, you chase him offscreen and...the level ends and you go to the next one
Dark Annie: So the guy got away with the stuff he stole
Dark Annie: Level 3. You get to the end...and don't get to fight the boss.
Gooper Blooper: Of course I'm just thinking of the Genesis Tiny Toons game, which had a brutally difficult final world
Bed Cozy: look, man, bosses are so hard to reprogram to make them EASIER
Bed Cozy: why can't we just
Dark Annie: Level 4 is different. You're in a football game. You have to get the ball across the line while dodging enemy players
Bed Cozy: exclude them
Dark Annie: ....except on Easy where Buster is just thrown the ball and runs across the whole field without opposition
Gooper Blooper: hahahahaha
Gooper Blooper: I was just about to guess
Dark Annie: It's a cutscene. The game basically says "You cannot do this so we're doing it."
Bed Cozy: the game just plays itself!
Dark Annie: Next level is a level with balloons with lots of jumps
Bed Cozy: ITS JUST ONE BALLOON
Dark Annie: ....that the game decides will be too hard so it just SKIPS THE LEVEL COMPLETELY
Bed Cozy: AND JUST ONE JUMP RIGHT
Gooper Blooper: you ride a hot air balloon- HAW
Bed Cozy: NOT EVEN ONE
Dark Annie: And you go right to the last level.
Bed Cozy: buster can't jump
Draco: This game's Easy Mode sounds like a douche.
Dark Annie: The last level, you play through half the level and...
Bed Cozy: you suddenly stop existing
Bed Cozy: and start playing a good game in another dimension
Draco: All the bosses you missed appear and attack at once.
Dark Annie: Okay. I get why this game has an Easy Mode. Now what do you think you should do for anyone who beats the game on it? Give them a small bit of congratulations maybe?
Bed Cozy: i knew tetris attack was a great idea
RubyChao: flip them off
Dark Annie: I mean they're probably a very young kid. A little bit of niceness seems logical
Gooper Blooper: Well, if I know these games like I think I do
Dark Annie: Instead....the credits just start rolling.
Gooper Blooper: it might be a black screen that says TRY AGAIN
Gooper Blooper: or that
Bed Cozy: congrats you did like
Dark Annie: You run into what would take you to the next part of the level on any other mode
Bed Cozy: 10% of the game
Dark Annie: Screen goes black, credits start to roll
Gooper Blooper: buster didn't bust loose at all
Gooper Blooper: he was quite restrained, thank you
---
Gooper Blooper: 😂😂😂REAL KOBBER HOURS WHO UP?!😂😂😂
---
Jumpropeman: I was just looking up old Disney Channel Original Movies
Jumpropeman: why does childstarlets.com have a login
---
ivel: http://kickfailure.com/2013/05/15/2173/
Big Cookie: we're going
Big Cookie: to take all that air
Big Cookie: take all that hot air and ram it up chaos's arse
Big Cookie: like we should
Jumpropeman: poor chao
RubyChao: D:
Big Cookie: NOT CHAO
Big Cookie: CHAOS
Big Cookie: LIKE
ivel: Chao no 😱
Big Cookie: THE CW VILLAIN
ivel: I'm glad I'm not the only one who read that as Chao
---
Jumpropeman: wait... Cornwind is like Harpy, but with villains instead of protags
Gooper Blooper: hahahahaha
Big Cookie: oh dear sweet mother of fuck
Gooper Blooper: That reminds me of Season 1 where for a while his main character was The Lord
Big Cookie: i feel filthy
Gooper Blooper: because he had no protags around
Big Cookie: filthy
ivel: TIME TO INTRODUCE MORE HARPVILLAINS
Big Cookie: *RPs her cute characters anyway"
ivel: wait that's all of Brandon's "friends"
Gooper Blooper: pfff
RubyChao: JRM PLS
Gooper Blooper: they form a Bad Friend Voltron
Big Cookie: GO GO BAD FRIEND RANGERS
Morose Sheep: Bad Friend Voltron is now my favorite thing
Gooper Blooper: their super move is to vacuum bail money out of nearby wallets
Big Cookie: Brandon dies a little inside and hides behind
Big Cookie: oh god they're like team rocket, goops
Big Cookie: no wait
Big Cookie: TEAM SKULL
Big Cookie: wait shit.
Gooper Blooper: UH, UH, TEAM SKULL
Big Cookie: team skull feels offended by being compared to those losers
---
Jumpropeman: i am a hansel fan
Gooper Blooper: gee, wonder why
---
(The Touhou popularity poll results come in)
Morose Sheep: But did tupai move up in the rankings?
Morose Sheep: is what we really want to know
RubyChao: well... no
RubyChao: he dropped from 136th to 148th
RubyChao: also: he got exactly one first place vote
RubyChao: JRM really is the only person who voted Tupai first
Big Cookie: those fucking dicks
Jumpropeman: ;_;7
---
Jumpropeman: Blissey is 103 lbs
Jumpropeman: you could easily pick up that big pink egg
Big Cookie: still lighter than i am
Gooper Blooper: pokemon weights generally don't make any sense at all
Gooper Blooper: they just kinda stab at a number and go "yeah sure"
---
Jumpropeman: we should do one of them fancy battle royales some day in pokemon
Jumpropeman: if we can somehow coordinate that in festival plaza without having to do calculus to achieve it
Gooper Blooper: hahaha
RubyChao: "okay so if we carry the 2, we can get... still only three people!?"
---
RubyChao: the tv just said "one of the greatest returners in the history of our sport" and all i can think of is king and cole
---
Del: Sooooo
Del: Uh
Del: Painis
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