A Nerd Club Christmas

-DECEMBER 24, 1999-

-MANHATTAN, NEW YORK-

"I do not very much enjoy Christmas."

It was Christmas Eve, and here a child with messy black hair hid under her sheets, grumbling to herself while peering at a book with a flashlight.

"Mother and father do not listen to me. I am certain I just got frilly girly things again. I bet they're pink."

The girl known as Viola Brown sighed, her cheeks puffing out. Long has she wanted to run away from home, start her own life where no one would make fun of her for liking the occult. She'd go far away and change her name. Viola was nice, but Brown was much too plain. Maybe something like... like...

She looked down at the book she was reading again. The Official Pokemon Handbook. She'd read it cover to cover many times, but she always came back for more. The pages were open to the two-page spread devoted to Gastly, Haunter, and Gengar, and she stared at those pages with wide, wistful eyes.

"I wish I could be a Pokemon Trainer. They get to go wherever they want and have adventures. Pokemon would not judge me."

Her eyes fell to the list of attacks the Pokemon could learn. The words "Night Shade" drifted over her vision.

"...Nightshade..."

GB Plots 2018 Retrospective

Alright, let's get this show on the road. Time to look back at all my plot events this year and let loose any behind-the-scenes or cutting room floor stuff!

Chatzy Madness Volume 318: Texts From Dolby

Brinehammer: Full disclosure; I never expected anyone to like Oda at all ;>.>
Yelly McHarpy: sorry brine, you humanized her too much
Yelly McHarpy: its the same trap you fall into every year
Brinehammer: You're not wrong... I just, dang. I meant for her to be a side character, not another main. Confirmed for Brawl though. She's Gotta.
Senior Drrrrrraco: Sorry, Brine, for making her happy.
Brinehammer: I guess I'll live with it :V
Senior Drrrrrraco: I'll make sure DeMonde inevitably betrays General-chan by saying anime isn't real.
ivel: DRACO YOU MONSTER
Senior Drrrrrraco: It's true, Ivel. Cory in the House didn't actually happen. >=l
ivel: ;;

---

Dia: kobberfans.jpg
ivel: that is Kaede.png ;U
RubyChao: you are right
RubyChao: that IS kaede

---

Dia: gacha reward
Gooper Blooper: Dia looking a little bit like Junko
Dia: lacks the aura
Dia: i mean
Gooper Blooper: not enough fluff
Dia: i can fix that :U
Dia: either way she's wearing golden pega wings
Dia: and i keep making saint seiya jokes at ivel in spite of the fact that i know 1% about seiya
Gooper Blooper: of course you only know 1%
Gooper Blooper: but it's the most important 1%
Gooper Blooper: because that one percent is the toughest of the one hundred percents
Dia: KEK
RubyChao: i love how that ikki meme will never die
RubyChao: just thanks to how absurd a phase "strongest of the 100 orphans" is
Gooper Blooper: if we ever get to 100 brawl entrants, keep your eye on ikki

Chatzy Madness Volume 317: Nyan-Nyan Baka Sheep-San Desu Desu =^.^=

Admiral BC of Marshmallows: also fuck i have ideas for Chickenplot 2019
Admiral BC of Marshmallows: oh god Miss Featherbutt might be a breakout char for 2019
Admiral BC of Marshmallows: what the fuck
Admiral BC of Marshmallows: it's too early go to bed, Miss Featherbutt

---

Jumpropeman: https://i.redd.it/71jsgzfhbiz01.jpg
iKomodo: turts
PhoneDel: Meenage Tutant Tinja Nortles

---

Brinehammer joined the chat
Gooper Blooper joined the chat
Jumpropeman: hi gooper brineper
Deletons: Gooper brineper
Deletons: A terrifying combo of sugar-addicted goth girls
Brinehammer: Cutest characters, hardest lurking.
Gooper Blooper: pff

---

Jumpropeman: apparently Knack had a crossover with a game called Destiny of Spirits, one of those "collect all the character" types of games. It included such memorable Knack characters as: Country Goblin, Powered-suit Goblin, Android Soldier, and Mining Robot
Gooper Blooper: all your favorites
Gooper Blooper: how about a knack smash brothers clone
Green Waluigi: oh, it was a Vita game
Green Waluigi: that's why I never heard of it :U
Jumpropeman: how I found it was that Giant Knack is one of the "Spirits" and his attack is creatively called Strong Arm Punch. Compare this to other characters having attacks like Power, Therefore Justice; Dangerous Philosophy; Invention of the Century; Freedom and Justice; and even Little Knack's Speed Star

---

Senior Drrrrrraco: Added Deb to my profiles.
Secretary of Defenestration: Deb, the sentient patch of haze?
Senior Drrrrrraco: Deb the...lady who walks up around huge gears.
Jumpropeman: finally, Deb's form revealed
Senior Drrrrrraco: Eeyup. Goops reminded me I hadn't put her profile up yet.
Secretary of Defenestration: I've been thinking about playing Deb, the sentient patch of haze.
Secretary of Defenestration: But she's kind of a bitch.
Senior Drrrrrraco: I don't know who that is, sadly.
Secretary of Defenestration: She's Deb, a sentient patch of haze.
Secretary of Defenestration: Obviously.
Jumpropeman: I don't know who she is
Secretary of Defenestration: Teasing, she's from Night Vale.
Secretary of Defenestration: I don't know who you are.
Jumpropeman: I don't know who I am
Senior Drrrrrraco: Ah.
Cornwind Evil: Time to introduce my new character, Shirtpants.

Chatzy Madness Volume 316: BRONTO BURT

Bree: https://twitter.com/qikipedia/status/993717130192457729
SteelKomodo: a bootyload is two whole buttloads :P
MobileDrac: Dirk knows an exact bootyload on sight.
SteelKomodo: canon
Del: https://twitter.com/rorvk/status/995823113723146241

---

Jumpropeman: "Hi, giant gross rabbit, I think video games should not be gatekept by weird tricks"
RubyChao: jumpropetom
Jumpropeman: Vince is right you know
Jumpropeman: Springtrap IS a giant gross rabbit
Spy Fights Heat Unproductively: He really is
Jumpropeman: oh hi spy!
Jumpropeman: I know a trick to fighting heat
Jumpropeman: you gotta Beat the Heat with the Digibeat! (All Summer!)
ivel: I don't think Spy will fit in the freezer
RubyChao: spy lives
ivel: oh :U
RubyChao: For Now
Jumpropeman: that ephemeral DigiBeat commercial shows the importance of the preservation of the most ephemeral pieces of media
Jumpropeman: how else would I be allowed to sing this song in public without having a source to cite
Gooper Blooper: >ephemerial media preservation
Jumpropeman: who knows how many "Next time on" style of commercials have disappeared into the air waves for all eternity
Gooper Blooper: in honor of jumpropeman's exsquisite taste
Gooper Blooper: rachel's in the bar
Jumpropeman: how can she be in the bar
Jumpropeman: when she's already in our hearts
Spy Fights Heat Unproductively: JRM no
Gooper Blooper: *links it again*
MobileDrac: Do people even like Rachel?
MobileDrac hides his cosplay.
Jumpropeman: *posts, ignoring Rachel*
Jumpropeman: *has turned his back on the Rachel universe*
Gooper Blooper: witness JRM's willpower to not have his characters glomp rachel every time she appears
Gooper Blooper: He doesn't have Gysel anymore to shower her with compliments, what will he do?!?!
Jumpropeman: Shimmer is currently shackled to her bed to keep her away from Rachel
Jumpropeman: barpost
Jumpropeman: I could only resist so long
Gooper Blooper: the sweet siren song of dear rachel called to JRM

(later)

Gooper Blooper: barpost
Gooper Blooper: I feel like JRM's going to point to this post and go "this is why I love Rachel"
Jumpropeman: *deletes chatzy message I was in the middle of writing* NO
Gooper Blooper: *JRM hides Rachel plush behind back*
Jumpropeman: and I swear
Jumpropeman: while Tomi and Rachel might not fite in Brawl
Jumpropeman: I won't NECESSARILY avoid her with all my cast :V
Jumpropeman: it just might happen
Jumpropeman: randomly
Jumpropeman: or she kills all my guys who knows
Gooper Blooper: She kills all of your entrants except Tomi to inflate her kill count
Gooper Blooper: Rachel sets a record for most KOs
Jumpropeman: Rachel kills 70 people before making it to the end
Jumpropeman: where Mac Tonight wins again somehow
Gooper Blooper: Or JRM does one of those "popular character is KOed by a heel-type entrant" things

---

PalaModo: Time for half-asleep rambles with SK
PalaModo: so what the heck was with that Babe film
PalaModo: and who greenlit the shit with that duck because they needed a punch in the stomach
Jumpropeman: the guy who made Mad Max
Jumpropeman: which explains a surprising amount

Chatzy Madness Volume 315: Doing A Boo-Boo With the Wa-Wa

Bree: my character with the largest breasts is komachi, who is a shinigami and doesn't get tired because she's an unliving revenant
Bree: also she's a lazy blob and she doesn't run 'cause she's slow as fuck
Bree: so I think it's perfectly realistic

---

Jumpropeman: it's not much, but check this out
Jumpropeman: I'm a recognized review source on mobygames :3
B.C.: aw
Jumpropeman: they only got the switch titles now but the others are in an approval queue
Gooper Blooper: Ha, that's great
Gooper Blooper: good work JRM
Bree: I could appreciate your achievement better if I knew what the mobygames site is about
Bree: do they collect reviews or something
Bree: is it like IMDB but for games
Jumpropeman: mobygames has been around since 1999. It's a video game information site sorta similar to IMDB yeah
infinitivel: "Video game information, credits, reviews, box covers, screenshots and more for 200+ video game platforms from 1950 to date!"
Jumpropeman: it's especially useful for finding info on retro games
Jumpropeman: so hopefully they'll approve my retro reviews as well
Bree: oh, okay, nice
Bree: cornflarturations
Bree: u did it
Gooper Blooper: Ah yes, the 50s, my favorite gaming decade
Jumpropeman: Gamerankings is my next prey, but they have a 300 review minimum before they recognize you :V
Gooper Blooper: maybe next offseason
Jumpropeman: a flood of atari and colecovision reviews
Jumpropeman: alternatively: a flood of barely different iOS dentist games
Gooper Blooper: I'm waiting for the day you review a real stinker from mobile game hell
Bree: I want a full disaster report on one of those inane beauty makeover games for little girls
Gooper Blooper: Honestly I feel like JRM could get a full disaster report out of mobile hell, but only if it was, like, a look at a number of different games all in the same category
Gooper Blooper: like "games that rip off Hello Neighbor" or "makeover/doctor games"
Gooper Blooper: Just one probably doesn't have enough substance for an in-depth lengthy review, and it'd let him dissect the general trend and the stuff that led to awful mobile shit being the norm
Jumpropeman: my white whale still remains A1 Celebrity Wedding Dentist Awesome Kids Little Surgery Salon HD - Fun Superstar Dental Doctor Office Makeover Game
Jumpropeman: I found the name, but by the time I had the hardware, it disappeared

---

Jumpropeman: steamed hams would eventually get into rp no doubt
Jumpropeman: might as well be first day
Jumpropeman: *scraps Just the Entire Steamed Hams Scene mystery fiter*
Jumpropeman: you might think they'd get no kills
Jumpropeman: but there's no Krusty Burger in sight
Jumpropeman: he'll have to get that meat elsewhere
Gooper Blooper: their weapon is a burning house, that's pretty dangerous
Jumpropeman: "These burgers are quite similar to the combined flesh of our fellow entrants." "Patented skinning- SKINNER... burgers"

Chatzy Madness Volume 314: Embrace the Baby Shit

Jumpropeman: I don't know if I ever told anyone that my used original Xbox came with tons of early 2000s music downloaded on it and whoever owned it before me set the system name to WHORE
Jumpropeman: first time I played Halo and went into multiplayer and just saw WHORE plastered across the screen
Jumpropeman: so confused
Gooper Blooper: that sounds hilariously edgy
Gooper Blooper: so early 2000s it hurts

---

Yijun: i want in on more mutant plot goddamn it and I NEED MORE MUTANTS
Yijun: *shoves Shiva in everything like he's the new fad*
Jumpropeman: *makes Knack into a mutant AND a psychic for maximum plot potential*
MobileDrac: Clone Sammy?
Yijun: we can't clone sammy
Yijun: that would destroy the very fabrics of our universe
MobileDrac: With joy

---

Jumpropeman: chao said he wanted to read about the beanie baby boom
Jumpropeman: but what about the big mouth billy bass boom
Jumpropeman: catfish, swordfish, lobster
Jumpropeman: there were singing fish on plaques across the land
Jumpropeman: and then suddenly we realized
Jumpropeman: we didn't actually like them
Jumpropeman: but it was too late
Jumpropeman: we rocked the boat
Jumpropeman: we rocked the boat baby
Jumpropeman: we rocked the boat
Jumpropeman: we tipped the boat over
Jumpropeman: we rocked the boaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa