Saturday, August 2, 2014

Chatzy Madness Volume 144: My Hatpeaches

iKomodo: Ooh, spah is on the forums
iKomodo: SPY ROUND HERE
Demoleter joined the chat
Demoleter: YER A BUTT-POKIN SNAKE AND BY GOD YOU'LL DIE LIKE ONE
iKomodo: Del pls D:

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RubyChao: i was frozen while being hit with repeated concussive force
RubyChao: it was fun
Demoleter: that doesn't sound too fun
RubyChao: it's just another way of saying i was at the beach :V

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M Sheep looks at new posts in fite topic
M Sheep sees Spy has entered Oceanus into a fite and not specified whether its lethal or not

M Sheep: So Oceanus is going to get back just in time to die again.
M Sheep weeps
.: Eh, death is a daily part of the ro-bro's life cycle
.: Wake up, brush your teeth, show off for Gloria, get ripped in half by a godbeast, go back to Celestia's
.: So long as Ricard doesn't eat Osh's brain he'll be okay

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Vengeance of the Psychic Wars: Mmmf those rockin' bagpipes. <3 ... Good god that sounds lewd. D: I retract my statement.

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Steam Challenge #1: oh no
Steam Challenge #1: blood bowl chaos edition is £5
Steam Challenge #1: JUST AS I SET OUT ON MY QUEST
Steam Challenge #1: TO COMPLETE MY STEAM GAMES
SteelKomodo: del pls D:
Steam Challenge #1: I'M TEMPTED TO BUY MORE
SteelKomodo: DON'T MAKE THE STEAM TRAIN ANY LONGER
Bree: lel do it
Bree: I'll be the shoulder devil to SK's shoulder angel
Bree: do it :U
SteelKomodo: WE CANNA TAAK ANY MORE COACHES

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The Thunder Kings Are Farms: In other news, Thor is now a woman.

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Ashurachao: i have a peanut butter pie thing for dessert
Ashurachao: literally sarah
Gooper Blooper: there's a little sarah in all of us
Gooper Blooper: deep inside
Fairy Bree: or a lot of sarah, just below the surface
Jumpropeman: chao is also currently being held at swordpoint by a red mage
Jumpropeman: victor demands to be RPed more
Gooper Blooper: IT WAS THE RED MAGE THAT DATED GLORIA
Jumpropeman: when gooper runs out of Sarahkin to RP
Jumpropeman: he'll start RPing the Sarah Exes
Ashurachao: the red mage that dated gloria wants no possible competition for the spot of gloria fanclub leader
Ashurachao: spy needs to watch out
Gooper Blooper: I ran out of sarahkin to RP this year
Gooper Blooper: my solution is to start rotating them back in
Gooper Blooper: the ride never ends
Fairy Bree: obvious solution: create more Sarahkin
Jumpropeman: uncle greg

(Later, after Chao eats the peanut butter pie)

Ashurachao: back
Ashurachao: i am going to die and priscilla will hate me for inflicting this on my teeth
Ashurachao: but it was so worth it

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Jumpropeman: we got DK, Samus, Kirby, Robin, and soon Greninja
Jumpropeman: we're gonna have a regular smash roster
Jumpropeman: Smash Bros RP
Fairy Bree: what about Pit?
Fairy Bree: he's in Smash right?
Jumpropeman: i knew i was forgetting someone
Fairy Bree: (warning: I know literally nothing about Smash)
Ashurachao: he is
Ashurachao: utsuho is so proud of it
Ashurachao: mostly because she's proud of 95% of what pit does
Jumpropeman: Utsuho is sitting there cheering as Pit eats cereal
Jumpropeman: THAT'S MY BOY

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Draco: Suddenly, Zett and Cervan enter Haven! "Would you like to buy some haunted lumber?" "We put extra ghosts in it to make it better than normal haunted lumber."
Draco: "On a scale of 1 to 2, it's 3spooky."

(FormerVengeance proceeds to make the haunted lumber canon)

Jumpropeman: I quite like that statement in absence of context
Jumpropeman: just an aside about haunted wood
Jumpropeman: for no reason
Jumpropeman: Tank is Alive
Gooper Blooper: I'm eagerly expecting "Joltik is alive" this september, followed by Joltik entering Minor Character Melee II and winning
Jumpropeman: Tank never reappeared though
Draco: That you know of.
Draco makes Tank the real power behind Beatbox's Decepticons.
Draco: ^Is definitely a joke and will not happen this year
Gooper Blooper: With good reason, because RD only ever enters fites
Gooper Blooper: If Tank entered another fite he would be dead, not alive
Gooper Blooper: but tank is alive

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Breesephine: that reminds me: I hope you go all out for the Brawl next year, JRM
Breesephine: because FIVE YEARS OF BRAWL HOLY SHIT
Gregropeman: I WILL DO THE CRAZIEST THING EVER
Gregropeman: like I do every brawl
Gooper Blooper: I have literally no idea how JRM could go any more all out than he already does unless he goes absolutely insane and demands 100 entrants next year

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Breesephine: guys, list some board games for me :U
Breesephine: child-appropriate ones only
Breesephine: not, like, Monopoly
Breesephine: which would bore the hell out of most kids
Gooper Blooper: Chutes and Ladders
Gooper Blooper: Candy Land
Gooper Blooper: Uncle Wiggly
Gregropeman: Uncle Wiggly
Gregropeman: does not sound
Gregropeman: like an appropriate game
Gooper Blooper: I played it when I was a kid, it's totes a real game
Sunspy: YOU'D BETTER NOT BE PLAYING UNCLE WIGGLY WITH MY BOY CHECKMATE, Y'HEAR!?!?

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Saberwulf: Kaplow
Saberwulf: Feast thine eyes upon yonder shit

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Vengeance of the Ger shom: "37.82 Boba Fett is actually a green, scaly humanoid about 25 centimeters tall. He controls his armor via a complicated system of levers, pulleys, and bits of string. DataPage 83400
37.91 Retraction: The editors would like to apologize to Mr. Fett for the above item, and ask that he please quit shooting our reporters. DataPage 83401"

―Satirical item in counterculture Galactic Weekly NewsStack
I blame JRM. He's clearly the editor of said paper.
Jumpropeman: that is something I would write
iKomodo: XD
Vengeance of the Ger shom: ;3

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Bree: meanwhile, I have ice cream
Vengeance of the Ger shom: D*8
Vengeance of the Ger shom: That's how we should have killed the dragon. Benevolently filling it with ice cream. Until it died. Because of aggrandizing kindness. And/or drowning.
iKomodo: Good on ye bree
Bree: that is Sarah's standard dragon-slaying tactic

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RubyChao: I RAN LIKE WIND, ATE LIKE LIGHTNING
RubyChao: AND WAITED THE SAME TIME AS I NORMALLY DID EXCEPT WITH MORE CHECKING OF TIME
RubyChao: hi
Gooper Blooper: yo
Gooper Blooper: According to Harpy she should be here within half an hour
Gooper Blooper: When she pops in we can get to disposing of today's second lesser villain
RubyChao: great
RubyChao: wait does that mean i could have eaten at a normal human rate
Bree: yeah probably, Chao XD
RubyChao: well shit

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Sarahbee: WE MUST FEED THE SARAH
Sarahbee: i love how I kept this name while tempting sarah with a donut

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Vengeance of the Ger shom: Damn me and my penchant for picking characters with nervous systems. D; I should have known it was a weakness I could avoid. ROCKS, BOYS. BRING MORE ROCKS. ROCS MADE OF ROCKS EVEN.
G: IF YA SUH-MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE​EEEEEEEEELL
G: WHAT THE ROC
G: IS COKIN'
Bree: "is cokin'"
Bree: pugs not drugs, kids

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Jumpropeman: The FYM graveyard is mostly open graves
G: True, but this open grave has oldladyskin in it!
Jumpropeman: and then one really long grave for the green giant
RubyChao: what about gunter
Jumpropeman: I didn't expect Gunter to come back this year, so who knows, maybe next year's brawl will have broken back Gunter enter
Jumpropeman: Brokeback Gunter
Bree: honestly, how many of the dead competitors do they even bury
Bree: Priscilla and April didn't even leave corpses since they basically...well, despawn when they get killed
Bree: (lel video gaming terms)
Bree: and canonically they just shipped Sapphire's body back to the Wheelers because they didn't know what to do with it
Bree: (they didn't want a repeat of last year)
Jumpropeman: might only be mystery fiters, although they keep unclaimed bodies on hand like Gunter and Ralph
Bree: and Jack revivalplot is like "lel huge morgue"
Jumpropeman: and Barf and Lone Starr :V
Bree: yeah but do they bury them
Bree: I said "how many dead competitors do they even bury"
Sarahbee: dig a pit, toss them into the pit, set them on fire
Sarahbee: can't let the plague spread
Jumpropeman: I can't say since it is really up to the user if their guy comes back :V
Jumpropeman: I imagine Grutz is in a grave
RubyChao: grutz was fired into the sun
G: Gamera was drowned
Jumpropeman: Gamera died in space, drifted INTO the sun, and high-fived grutz

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Sarahbee: i'm feeling better
RubyChao: yaaaaaaay
Bree: yay Harpy feeling better~
Sarahbee: probably because I beat a misogynist the hell up
Sarahbee: and fed sarah
Bree: lel feeding Sarah is the cure for all ills?
Sarahbee: yes
Sarahbee: for if you heal her, she will cast esuna
Bree: Alex = happiest man on earth
Sarahbee: and that heals ALL STATUS EFFECTS
Gooper Blooper: step right up and feed the sarah, a dollar a bag
Gooper Blooper: Also I'll toss in a small edit to reflect that, Bree
Sarahbee: last i checked it was a quarter for sarah feed
Sarahbee: like feedin' ducks!
RubyChao: inflation
Sarahbee: only you're like tossing entire cakes at her

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Bree: Melody is cheered up by this offering
RubyChao: rad
Bree: DID SOMEBODY SAY
Bree: RAD
Bree Wheelers bust in
Bree including tiny Sapphire


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Jumpropeman: does Myriam have drain plugs keeping her pigtails up

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Cornwind Evil: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Draco: Yellow. Duh.
iKomodo: That depends on the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow.
Cornwind Evil: Do you mean an African swallow or a Vietemese swallow?
iKomodo: I... I don't know- *is thrown off a bridge*
Cornwind Evil: I lose more British people that way

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Dacro: if santa ods is it a ho ho hoverdose?

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Dacro: why is it not friday? i like those
Vengeance, Reinstated: It's not Freyr's day because it is still Thor's day. And if you don't much care for Thor's days, just remember Wodin's days breach the middle of the week, Tyr's days the second, and Morn's days the first. That should help you abide. No idea what this business of the Roman god Saturn is doing with a day on my list, or just plain 'Sun' 's day. Feels like a copout. But I didn't write the calender. If I did, there would be more Norse gods and less eventual redaction to lesser words.

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RubyChao: man i just realized poor victor
RubyChao: "i met a red mage!" "you did? what were they like?" "he captured women and shoved them in vats."
RubyChao: ".......Oh."

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RubyChao: someday i will finish writing up victorlore
RubyChao: but i must overcome my greatest opponent
Vengeance, Reinstated: What is this greatest opponent
RubyChao: laziness
RubyChao slumps

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Gooper Blooper: If you're wondering what Silence is up to
Gooper Blooper: This, except she doesn't say anything
SteelKomodo: :3

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Unbreelievable (not bree): brb summoning CW again
Unbreelievable (not bree): YOU'RE GONNA WIN BBB5, CW
Unbreelievable (not bree): I BELIEVE IN YOU
Gooper Blooper: NO
Gooper Blooper: BBB5 IS MY YEAR
Gooper Blooper: pls
Unbreelievable (not bree): I HAVE ABANDONED GOOPS AND PUT ALL MY FAITH INTO YOU, CW
Gooper Blooper: and then mac tonight wins again
RubyChao: harpy
Unbreelievable (not bree): COME FORTH
Gooper Blooper: harpy why
RubyChao: how could you betray us like that D:
Unbreelievable (not bree): i'm not srs :U
Unbreelievable (not bree): we all know next year is spy's year B3
Unbreelievable (Actually Bree): she's just summoning CW lel
RubyChao: NEXT YEAR IS MY YEAR
Unbreelievable (not bree): RUBY YOU ALREADY HAD A YEAR GO AWAY
RubyChao is pushed aside due to already getting his year
Unbreelievable (Actually Bree): hrng can't decide which sarahkin to vote for
Unbreelievable (not bree): go with the one who beat the Lord
RubyChao: so, gloria
Unbreelievable (not bree): i believe BBB188 is my year
RubyChao: GLORIA RETROACTIVELY BEAT THE LORD
Gooper Blooper: None of the sarahkin beat the lord
Tableter: Vote the cute one
Unbreelievable (not bree): darn
Tableter: Lel
Gooper Blooper: Sarah beat a fragment
RubyChao: sarah killed a piece of the lord
Unbreelievable (not bree): sarah helped kill the lord
Unbreelievable (not bree): she also killed dr. wily and a guy who knew ultima
Tableter changed name to Trolleter
Unbreelievable (not bree): none of the sarahkin know ultima
RubyChao: Lord Fragment Four-Way Face-Off
Unbreelievable (not bree): top lol
RubyChao: Zeph vs. Sarah vs. Erebus vs. Alex Riding In Optimus Prime
iKomodo: Pfffft

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Jumpropeman: guys, I have a confession to make. My name if Jumpropeman, and I'm a Faerie Solitairaholic
Jumpropeman: i don't know why im addicted to fucking solitaire of all things
Vengeance, Reinstated: It's okay. I already knew, sonny. Steam hides no man's sins forever.
Vengeance, Reinstated: -pat pat-
Gooper Blooper: Steam told me
Jumpropeman: im so sorry

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RedSpy: I'm a slave to ridiculous ice cream concoctions at Cold Stone
Jumpropeman: Spy is a Cold Stone shill D:
RedSpy: When you have a terrifying mix of marshmallow, peanut butter, cookie dough, and a giant brownie, do you NEED anything else?
Gooper Blooper: Celestia orders Cold Stone for Sarah
RedSpy: I'm not a Cold Stone shill, I'm a Stone Cold shill
RedSpy stunners JRM
RedSpy stunners Ven
RedSpy stunners the whole goddamn ring

Vengeance, Reinstated stunnered
Gooper Blooper: BAH GAWD THE NEW YORK RATTLESNAKE HAS DONE IT AGAIN

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Breeliever: guys, here's a fun fill-in-the-blank: Lisa has tits the size of ______
Jumpropeman: North Dakota
RedSpy: Gabe Newell
Unbreelievable (not bree): texas

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RubyChao: i just have this mental image of the gray woman heading out to meet derosa
RubyChao: opens the tree door
RubyChao: giant pile of rubble
RubyChao: "shit"

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RubyChao: so what's the court record equivalent of the attorney's badge
RubyChao: so i can present it to everyone and see the dialogue
Gooper Blooper: If Tenshi is doing it, it's a peach
Gooper Blooper: She just plucks one off her hat and holds it out
Gooper Blooper: "this is a peach"
Gooper Blooper: "it came from my hat"
RubyChao: "My hatpeaches. They're proof that I'm a celestial."
Gooper Blooper: Myriam probably has some dumb business card she printed out herself
Gooper Blooper: Celestia presents her hat
RubyChao: tenshi interrupts the dramatic confrontation with the gray woman by shoving a peach in her face
RubyChao: "what is this" "It's a peach, of course."

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Bree: does Momoko technically count as Tenshi and Viola's baby
RubyChao: tenshi throws stones at anyone who suggests that
Gooper Blooper: celestials who live in vacuum-sealed spaceships shouldn't throw stones
Bree: YOU CAN'T DENY IT FOREVER, TENSHI
Bree: YOU AND VIOLA ARE DESTINED TO BE LESBIANS

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RubyChao: fiore was The Worst
Gooper Blooper: the absolute worst

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Vengeance, Reinstated: Sine is ~Magic~ -raises sparkly hands-

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RubyChao: the last document was going to be in whatever document we looked at last :V
Gooper Blooper: Well I wanted it to be in one of the duller ones, which would naturally be chosen last
Gooper Blooper: Or to reward whoever looked at Vats over Mammon and went "boy howdy this one looks good"
RubyChao: hahaha
RubyChao: good call, then
Gooper Blooper: got you guys fighting over Experiment Notes
Gooper Blooper: Vats was the kid picked last for sports
RubyChao retroactively uses his new character Vatman, who is highly interested in vats

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Draco: Draco's out of RP for the year. He had his extended cameo for the Brawl, but he's taking a backseat unless the opportunity to make a Sarah fat joke comes up, like suggesting that Sarah will win the Fite because she's hiding a partner under her robe - oh wait, that's just her gut.
Keeby: how dare u
Jumpropeman: we were gonna hold all the fites in the same arena, but the sarahkin fite filled a stadium on its own
RubyChao: what about when vinaplot is over and you're out of characters
RubyChao: will draco come back then
Draco: No. That's when Vina and Rebecca become talking heads until it's time to take Samus out for a makeover.
RubyChao: samus treats being taken for a makeover like being a prisoner of war taken for torture-based interrogation
Bree: hahahahaha
Bree: I must see this actually happen
RubyChao: "NO, PLEASE! I'LL TELL YOU ANYTHING! JUST DON'T DO THIS TO ME!" "it's just a makeover samus"
Keeby: she'd never give up like that
Keeby: she's like
Keeby: :I
Draco: They'll spend an entire day planning it like it's some counter-terrorism assault. "We have exactly ten minutes to get in, pick out a dress, and get out before the sale ends. We'll rendevous by the hair salon at 1350 for our appointment, get our hair done, and then storm the spa for a quick pedi."
RubyChao: now see
RubyChao: that's how you'd get samus interested

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RubyChao: tenshi totally dragged viola, siren, and melody into a cool group pose for myriam's front page
RubyChao: naturally, tenshi was center stage
Keeby: Siren puts her mask on Tenshi
Keeby: one step closer to be
Keeby: EL TORRO
Bree: I like to imagine the group photo has Tenshi in the center, taking up most of the frame; Siren on the left, and Viola on the right, blushing furiously while also trying to be sinister and mysterious
RubyChao: and melody is standing on tenshi's head :V
Bree: and then Melody is literally standing on Tenshi's head, waving to the camera
Bree: oh also Siren is posing fabulously

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Jumpropeman: I think X is actually Colonel Mustard in the Study with the candlestick

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Bree: I found the Mercutio armor set on WoW and I am going to obtain it and I'm going to fucking wear it

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Bree: if I go along for Thunder Kings, we can retroactively assume that the dolls were being carried around in people's bags while exploring happened
Bree: (the dolls are kinda slow on their own, lel)
SteelKomodo: (lel)
Bree: Melody insists on "riding" with Richard, because she's super excited about exploring
Bree: (i.e., if she's there)
SteelKomodo: i c
Bree: she dons a tiny explorer hat and waves around a tiny fake treasure map
Bree: EXPLORIN
Bree: Octavious facepalming in background

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Vengeance, Reinvigorated: How goes, though?
Dacro: goes well
Dacro: work actually trusts me with a laptop
Jawsropeman: I'll call them and tell them they are making a grave mistake
Vengeance, Reinvigorated: XD
Dacro: please do
Dacro: my life is a living hell since i saw. the typing is hyperrealistic
Jawsropeman: I've written a chatzy creepypasta
Jawsropeman: I call it... CHATZY MADNESS!!!
Dacro: ohnoz
Dacro: 2spooky
Jawsropeman: it's about 12 or so people spending all summer talking about hyperrealistic butts in a chatroom
RubyChao: hello for a bit
Jawsropeman: chao was summoned by creepypasta

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Jawsropeman: I realize now the LEWD emote has the faces on the completely wrong sides. Jewel Man is looking off to the right and Lisa is winking towards the left
Jawsropeman: TIS THE CURSE OF THE ARTIST TO NEVER BE SATISFIED
Draco: Indeed.
Draco: Verily.
Draco: Quite so.
Jawsropeman: The Drachorus
Vengeance, Whoops: Is that why so few in the porn industry call themselves artists? Oh, gods. That would suck, even more capslock-wise than JRM's asserting post.
Vengeance, Whoops: Never satisfied indeed. ;__;

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Bree: nobody ever did answer me if Osh has a crush on Gloria
Bree: ANSWER ME YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES

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