Saturday, January 12, 2019

Chatzy Madness Volume 320: Bend Over For Bend (Big Bar Brawl 8 Edition)

Minus Sheep: Sidebar: I almost always write Camilla as being a tennis pro instead of being a golfing pro and thankfully have always caught it before posting
Zeldoten: She can be both. :I
Renais: ^
Renais: is renais good at tennis?
Renais rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 15
Renais rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 15
Renais rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 15
Renais rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 4

Renais: ...
Renais: i love how every prinny BUT Gavin is good at tennis
Minus Sheep: Gavin can't catch a break
Minus Sheep: #FreeGavin
Zeldoten: Wow. Three 15s in a row.
Renais: Bonnie's a cheerleader, Renais is just your stereotypical magical girl with tennis powers, and Gonzy is
Renais: just
Renais: himself
Renais: he exists
Zeldoten rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 1
Zeldoten: Zeldoten is surprisingly awful at Tennis.

---

Renais: I'm surprised Zeldo didn't actually come in to hire Raven for something
Draco: She was in Las Vegas on business.
Renais: breaks into wicasa's place just to hire him
Draco: "Hey, goat guy. I need a magic goat." "Come back in never. I'm sleeping."
Renais: "If you want a magic goat, harass me in the morning, sheesh..."
Draco: "Alright." *Zeldo waits* *Five Seconds* "Is it morning?"
Renais: "...Rune." "Boss." "Go find her the goat while I'm sleeping. You know where they are."
Renais: "...Siiiigh. Fine."
Draco: "Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!" Zeldo rides the goat into the sunset. (;
Renais: Raven holds up his phone and plays "DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC"
Draco: "Sorry, I voted for Oda."
Renais: "Jokes. Head. Woosh."
Renais: "Oda the aggressive touhou will most certainly win the brawl."
Draco: Zeldoten buys a second goat and hooks them up to a sled.
Renais: "We're in for a wild ride, folks."
Draco: There is a 92.45% chance that Zeldo won't just feed them to DeMonde's crocodile.
Renais: i mean
Renais: she could
Renais: just pace your goat eating so we don't damage the local ecology :U
Draco: D: Goats are serious business. We'll just feed the croc Poppos instead.
Renais: those, on the other hand, are an invasive species :U
Draco: Excellent!
Draco throws truckloads of Poppos to the sharks.

---

Jumpropeman: writing's done, art's begun
Jumpropeman: (let's pretend the pre-fite show is not part of writing)
Draco: I have no imagination though. D:

---

A Figment of your Imagination: I want pizza.
A Figment of your Imagination: Why can't I buy freshly cooked pizza off of Amazon?

---

M Sheep joined the chat
RubyChao: hey hey hey hey sheep
ivel: we've been expecting you, Mr Sheep
RubyChao: how does it feel to know there are only five days until you are saddled with the despair of winning a brawl
ivel: I thought we were waiting until he writes it himself to do that
RubyChao: sheep: is this jeffery when he discovers trivia challenges can be classed as sports
M Sheep: Jeffery doesn't have the charisma for television.
M Sheep: >implying I might win the Brawl
M Sheep: Here's actual footage of Jeffery in the Brawl
ivel: we're not implying you might
ivel: we're saying you WILL
ivel: >:I
M Sheep: get
M Sheep: oooooout
ivel left the chat
RubyChao: yeah but we know dmitri will surprise us all

---

Jumpropeman: meanwhile, here's Amity as an inkling

---

True Facts about the Del: Hell yeah minor character melee
True Facts about the Del: Gonna enter my entire roster

---

BookSnipeZZZ: So big news Bree
BookSnipeZZZ: My relationship is now a full on triad. My partners have both started going out. How terrifying!
Bree: snipe and her girls are the new lesbros

---

N Goat: Duck may be the most ridiculous Battlebot I have seen.
N Goat: I am forced to revise my earlier Battle Bots statement: Battle Royale With Cheese and it's slider minibot is the most ridiculous bot I've ever seen

(later)

Gooper Blooper: >starts watching new episode of battlebots
Gooper Blooper: >episode begins with the pulverizer smashing a VCR while one of the announcers says "Nobody should be watching VHS anymore! It's obsolete technology!"
Gooper Blooper: this kills the dolb
ivel: D:
M Sheep: Oh hey, I actually saw that episode!
RubyChao: i'm imagining dolby just
M Sheep: I guess I caught up
RubyChao: hurling tape out of her mouth
RubyChao: the equivalent of foam
RubyChao: maria's like "awww fuck they broke her again"
ivel: Nostalgia Elementals vs BattleBots?
Gooper Blooper: DON'T MAKE ME CHOOSE, BATTLEBOTS, YOU DON'T WANT THIS FIGHT
Gooper Blooper: LET'S ALL JUST GET ALONG
ivel: TOO LATE, THIS WAS AN ACT OF AGGRESSION

---

Renais: shit man, who do i throw in the bar
Gooper Blooper: Harpy appeals to the great and powerful Shit Man to ask his opinion on who to RP as
MobileDraco: Someone called?
Renais: all my posts are shitposts until after the brawl

---

Jumpropeman: art I think is half done and pre-fite show work is starting
Jumpropeman: and when I say art is half done I mean we only drew half of each image and are adding the rest in soon
RubyChao: excellent plan

---

RubyChao: i made pork, a potato medley, and leeks with a mustard/butter dressing
Renais: that sounds yummy
RubyChao: that's why i've been so quiet, actually
RubyChao: runnin back and forth to the kitchen
Renais: this is why i mobile chat while cooking dinner ;U
Renais: ...implying i cook anything, ever
Renais: you burn your hand once and then never again
Jumpropeman: you're always cooking
Jumpropeman: up new ideas! ;D
Renais: yeah because if i don't my anxiety takes over
Jumpropeman: just remember to wear oven mitts
Renais: rather think of 70 dumb things than overworry over one small detail that in the end nobody will care about
Jumpropeman: *considers turning dumb joke into actual advice but gets lazy*
Renais: i'd rather write sad kisha story
Renais: then wish she was happy
Renais: and i'll stop there because whatever comes next will be super depressing
Gooper Blooper: *sends her to the bakery to cheer her up*
Renais: "HA I WISH I GOT MARRIED SO I CAN HAVE A CAKE 10 TIMES TALLER THAN ALEX"
Renais: "wait shit that'd still be small."
Gooper Blooper: burn
Gooper Blooper: but what about
Gooper Blooper: ten times taller than Alex's wedding cake
Renais: "My stomach isn't ready for this."
Renais rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 18
Gooper Blooper: OR IS IT
Renais: "But..."
Renais: "WE FIGHT THIS LIKE TRUE MEN *pulls out oversized knife* "

---

RubyChao: "The Mushroom City track in Mario Kart: Double Dash contains a "Wario Pharmacy" building. However, the interior visible through the glass depicts tables with wine glasses on them, suggesting that it might not be a legitimate pharmacy."
RubyChao: wario, why
Gooper Blooper: that's amazing
Gooper Blooper: and very wario

---

Gooper Blooper: too bad cirno missed Chatzy Madnesses 9 and 99
Gooper Blooper: I somehow don't think we'll get to 999
Jumpropeman: nonsense
Jumpropeman: each chatzy madness is a single line now
Cornwind Evil: She can just have Chatzy Madness 333

---

Jumpropeman: i have two folders in my cloudinary account
Jumpropeman: a general one
Jumpropeman: and a Cirno one
Jumpropeman: and there's only one Cirno picture
Draco: There should be nine.
M Sheep: There should be
M Sheep: 0
Draco: D8
Jumpropeman: I think I made the folder by accident when learning cloudinary

---

Jumpropeman: gooper's 2019 plot
M Sheep: Now that's a major spoiler!
Draco: GASP

---

Cornwind Evil: "Doktor Hanz is slapping his metal meat" Lewd.

---

Brawdel???: Jrm you're doing amazing with Sam and max
Brawdel???: Just take them from me I'm no good

---

MBrawl Sheep: >Reaching up and grabbing Jeffery’s stick, he immediately got admonished with a hellish scream from the skeleton,
MBrawl Sheep: I don't know why, but this made me giggle like crazy.
MBrawl Sheep: I guess because it's like Jeffery's this petulant monkey that's screaming at him

---

brawlvel: [x[ :U
brawlvel: messed up the tag but it wasn't important
Brawlropeman: SPOILER IVEL D::::::::::::::::::::::

---

Brawlropeman: I'm a pile of tarantulas

---

BrawlChao: also BBB8 i like how once again all of Brine's entrants are making deep runs, just like last year
BrawlChao: brine and harpy are currently the only people without anyone out!
Brawlhammer: I was hoping no one would notice >_>
Big Bloop Brawl: We live in a world where Arr racked up two KOs

---

Cornwind Brawl: Nyx on a Smooze Tidal wave against Brilliant Kid and a Goat army. Now THIS is what makes the Brawl the Brawl.
Cornwind Brawl: WWE has "Wrestlemania Moments", we should have "Brawl Moments."
Big Bloop Brawl: I was reluctant to draw a picture this complicated (I cheated a lot on the right side of the pic) but there were two reasons I went ahead and did it
Big Bloop Brawl: 1) I like Nyx 2) The concept was so fucking stupid it had to be drawn
Brawlropeman: I knew it had to be Goops to draw it too. I can do stupid art, my sisters could do stupid art... but the color makes it perfect

---

Brawlropeman: more brawl fun facts: the most recent post is titled in my notes: #NOBIAS
Prinnystick: #bias
Brawlropeman: that's what you think harpy, but look at that title again
Brawlropeman: it can't be wrong :V
Big Bloop Brawl: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Big Bloop Brawl: AN ENTIRE POST OF NOTHING BUT RACHEL WINNING

---

BrawlChao: i loved nilmates being totally useless
Brawlropeman: I couldn't have him out of character, Chao

---

BrawlChao: bbb8 someday it'll be your year, harps
Prinnystick: top 10 is all I can do now? damn it :I good run but now i just want 1st place even more.
Prinnystick: i thought it would be my year because SECOND PLACE... but i guess Hiroki/Cindy/Miss Featherbutt is gonna have to win it for me next year ;U
Prinnystick: i'll try not to cry too much (i'm not crying now tho)
Brawlropeman: ive been ready for a harpwin for so long
Brawlropeman: JUST GIVE IT TO ME
Brawlropeman: I'M READY TO WRITE IT

---

Prinnystick: big bar brawl, more like BIG BROTHER BRAWL
Prinnystick: spoiler: TODAY WE FIND OUT WHO IS THE SURPREME TWINSIE
BrawlChao: bbb8 I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS COMING DOWN TO BRITBRO VS. BRITBRO
BrawlChao: relevant
Brawlropeman: not quite your dream Chao, but I laughed seeing it
Prinnystick: BROTHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER
BrawlChao: holy shit you're right
When Brawly: THIS IS AWESOME
When Brawly: CLAP CLAP CLAPCLAPCLAP
BrawlChao: for clarification: i had a dream that the final two was Kinnikuman Tiger vs. Toinette
BrawlChao: wrong characters but right users
Prinnystick: definitely not what you thought it would be but you're a partial prophet, chao
Prinnystick: you should predict my brawl win next ye-
Brawlropeman: did you see who won in the dream?
Prinnystick: in 2020-
Prinnystick: never-
Draco: Excellent, Chao.
BrawlChao: so jrm, tell me
BrawlChao: regardless of who wins: how much did you laugh and laugh when you realized the final battle was sibling rivalry
Brawlropeman: NO CHAO I WON'T TELL YOU WHO WINS THE BRAWL
Brawlropeman: oh
Brawlropeman: I was a bit sad that they won't get to see it live or together, but it is still amazing tractor swingery
Draco: I need to stop putting Sam and Max/Captain Spooner Briggs stuff in the BIG BAR BRAWL TICKER SPECIAL or it's gonna be ten pages long.
Brawlropeman: I feel like the joke was always the JRMsisters finale
Cornwind Brawl: The Lion and the Unicorn are fighting for the crown.
BrawlChao: but which one is which, cornwind
Brawlropeman: this finale is much more hype in a meta way, but I still tried to sell hero vs. villain to give it something in RP :V
BrawlChao: trust me it stll works
BrawlChao: but yes the meta aspect is a big part :V
BrawlChao: holy shit
BrawlChao: i legit thought vent had that, but no
BrawlChao: IT IS THE YEAR OF BONER KING

---

MBrawl Sheep: Phoenix Ikki placed last. Now he places in the exact middle. Next time...there's only first.

---

MBrawl Sheep: WOW! Is this our first heel victory?!
Jumpropeman: sheep are you saying Mac Tonight wasn't a heel
MBrawl Sheep: Yes.
MBrawl Sheep: HAIL TO THE ONLY KING THAT MATTERS! I can dig it!

---

Inhale My Del Enragement Child: SKELETON GOD
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: DANA NA NA NA NAAAA
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: What a brawl, thanks jrm!
iKomodo: AAAAAARGH SO CLOSE
iKomodo: CLOSEST I EVER BEEN
iKomodo: outstanding work JRM, much thank
Jumpropeman: glad you liked it guys
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: Gotta work on those royalties for skeleton king now, he's got people lining up wanting him to promote their cereal!
Jumpropeman: "These Cheerios taste delicious! Even when they're dry as a BONE!"
Jumpropeman: "Not that I'd really know. I can't taste anything!"
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: "Remember to have them with milk so your bones are strong when I take them!"

---

Inhale My Del Enragement Child: big boner brawl
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: cos Miu, prier and Dr lewd were in it
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: I'm here all week, folks, tip your waitresses

---

Gooper Blooper: I noticed something hilarious about the Brawl picture filenames
Gooper Blooper: Most of them are the usual silly elaborate names JRM does every year, so I'll make the list as per usual, but Rachel's death is just "4th_place"
RubyChao: he was sad

---

Gooper Blooper: two days ago I had my first Halloween-in-stores sighting
Gooper Blooper: because when I think July 9
Gooper Blooper: I think Halloween
RubyChao: no wonder Halloween Creep Plot is this year
Gooper Blooper: That gave me the idea. The Brawl results pushed it into actually happening.
Gooper Blooper: Or, alternatively, the creep would have been less extreme
Cornwind Evil: This creep in general reminds me of a Monty Python joke
Cornwind Evil: Where they're trying to top each other for how rotten their lives once were
Cornwind Evil: "I used to get up at 5 AM!" "I used to get up at 2 AM!"
Cornwind Evil: The concluding Dial to 11 bit
Cornwind Evil: "I had to get up at 10'o Clock at night half an hour before I went to bed."
Cornwind Evil: I feel like that's the end point of the creep
Cornwind Evil: "The stores have started selling Halloween 2020 material in July 2019..."

---

Renais: WHO'S READY FOR OCTOPATH TRAVELER
Renais: BECAUSE I AM ONLY PARTIALLY READY

---

RubyChao: do you guys want some INCREDIBLY TRAGIC RP NEWS (disclaimer news may not be incredibly tragic)
SteelKomodo: what is that
RubyChao: Captain Benjamin Spooner Briggs was not successfully revived ;_;7
M Sheep: But what about Nilmates?
SteelKomodo: nooooo D:
RubyChao: it's Nilmates, you think anything like that could put him down? he's already rambling off about Sailor Boy's tragic loss

---

M Sheep: Ladislaus, what are you even doing here.
RubyChao: ladislaus
M Sheep: I should have sent literally anyone else.
M Sheep: Get Tom The Cat in here.
M Sheep: Somebody
M Sheep: Anybody
M Sheep: Is it too late to say it's Doc Croc in a fat suit?

(later)

M Sheep: Meanwhile...Ladislaus.
M Sheep: Tactical Obesity Action
M Sheep puts head in hands

(later)

M Sheep asked Chatzy to choose between the fat man eats the goo and why would he do that. Chatzy chose: the fat man eats the goo
M Sheep: Oh wait, he can't get at it anyway
M Sheep: Well, there will be, I'm sure, plenty of chances for Ladislaus to put questionable materials in his mouth down the road.
Gooper Blooper: XD
M Sheep: Look, you have to work with the mutation you're given.
RubyChao: sheep
RubyChao: i want to offer you a terrifying thought
RubyChao: utsuho with ladislaus's power

---

RubyChao: i have a prediction
RubyChao: this will be the last Samhain plot, since after Christmas, Thanksgiving, and Halloween all going bad, there's no holidays really connected enough/with the same timeframe to make, like, Easter Creep or Canadian Independence Day Creep plots work
Gooper Blooper: I'M GOING TO DO A SAMHAIN PLOT ABOUT COLUMBUS DAY AND YOU'RE GONNA LIKE IT
M Sheep: Time to fight Hanukkah!
M Sheep: Festivus for the rest of us.
Gooper Blooper: It's a Festivus miracle!
RubyChao: can't wait for New Year's Eve to try and get the new year to start on November 1st

---

Jumpropeman: I'd say you can take off spoiler tags
Bree: okay
Bree: in that case
Bree: SKELETON KING SKELETON KING SKELETON KING
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: I was always a minor boner ruler
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: A boner duke
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: But now
Inhale My Del Enragement Child: I'm the boner king

---

Jumpropeman: hot cheetos have this contest going where if you find a certain shape you win a prize
Jumpropeman: but I really like breaking them apart into smaller pieces to eat them in scoops
Jumpropeman: I'm forced to decide if the risk of winning is worth this minor inconvenience to eating

---

WITH AN AXE: srspost
WITH AN AXE: julius is sassy???
WITH AN AXE: ?
Bree: juliusass
Bree: ok no that just sounds like we're talking about his butt
SteelKomodo: XD
WITH AN AXE: julius has no ass, it was lost to him forever when he became an astral knight
ivel: asstral knight
WITH AN AXE: also the armour is not very flattering
Bree: ba dum tsh
Bree: "armour" with a U reminds me of something stupid that I don't think I included in my brawl reactions
Bree: I told chao "imagine if brilliant kid placed third, we could call it... THE BIG BRITISH BRAWL"
WITH AN AXE: nice
WITH AN AXE: i'd like that as a tiny variant
WITH AN AXE: find all our british characters
Bree: octavious is british
Bree: I don't think we have that many british characters :V
WITH AN AXE: i hear a lot of sk's old characters with british accents sometimes
SteelKomodo: Pit and Dirk are Irish, does that count?

---

WITH AN AXE: so
WITH AN AXE: i ended up on the danganronpa wiki
WITH AN AXE: and now my head hurts and i don't think i learnt anything new
RubyChao: you fool, del

---

RubyChao: oh god
RubyChao: imgur changed their front page because ~social network~
RubyChao: it's awful
B.C.: im in hell
RubyChao: time to never visit it ever again

---

Jumpropeman: not sure when it was added, but I thought sheep would like to know
Jumpropeman: I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream is on Steam
RubyChao: oooh!
Gooper Blooper: I Have No Mouth And I Must Steam
M Sheep: Steamed Hams?
Gooper Blooper: I hope you're prepared
iKomodo: GOOD LORD

---

Gooper Blooper: I like how sheep, in his unwillingness to keep antagonizing Sakura Atari
Gooper Blooper: has simply made another Sakura Atari

---

ivel: "As Alaska’s famed frontier Blockbusters go dark there’s 1 store left in entire U.S."
ivel: "The Alaska closures will leave the Blockbuster in Bend, Ore., as the sole holdout U.S.-wide."
M Sheep: Ah, John Oliver couldn't save it then.
Jumpropeman: so sheep
M Sheep hides
Jumpropeman: when are you gonna RP the last employee of the last blockbuster
M Sheep: That's a very specific Rp ask
ivel: no, he couldn't, sadly
Jumpropeman: it seems like your bag
M Sheep: Maybe 3 years from now, JRM
M Sheep: Maybe then...
Jumpropeman: when we finally have Bend, Oregon as our setting, yes
Jumpropeman: BEEN ASKING FOR IT YEARS
Jumpropeman: #BENDOVERFORBEND
Draco: Can we have our next setting be Bend, Oregon?
Gooper Blooper: Maybe Cyber City will fly over it at one point
Bree: cloud city can fly over bend, oregon
Bree: ninja'd
Jumpropeman: The Kobbers come for movie rentals
Jumpropeman: but they stay for
Jumpropeman: they stay for...
Jumpropeman: google load quicker please
Jumpropeman: "In 2015, Men's Journal ranked Bend as one of The 10 Best Places to Live Now"
Jumpropeman: the fact that it's paradise on earth apparently

---

RubyChao: link
Jumpropeman: really glad they never changed that name
Cornwind Evil: Some things just stick
Cornwind Evil: The Final Fantasy VI I'm playing
Cornwind Evil: Has been fully retranslated to better mirror the original script
Cornwind Evil: But several of the SNES lines remain unchanged, because fans would riot otherwise
Jumpropeman: does Kefka say fuck more
Jumpropeman: because fan translations assure me
Jumpropeman: he says fuck all the time

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