Today I bring you a bittersweet Christmas gift: the final Chatzy Madness.
Perhaps you saw this coming, since it's been so long since the last one. I fell far behind after doing a pretty good job of being up-to-date for years. The thought of combing over a hundred chat logs for funny quotes sounds like a grind and a chore instead of a fun task, and I think that's my cue to stop. I know this will disappoint some people as Chatzy Madness had a few vocal fans, and I also feel disappointed in myself for not mustering the will to keep it going, but last week I started trying to work on it again, got through about six days, saw an hour had passed, and thought "I'm wasting way too much time on this". So it's time to wrap it up.
Really, if you think about it, this blog series lasting as long as it has is kind of nuts. Chatzy Madness is 429 volumes spanning over 14 years. I think that's a pretty damn good run, almost as long as ZFRP itself. If you read all 429 Chatzy Madnesses, I'd give you an Achievement or something if I could. Thanks for sticking with me. I hope you enjoy the last Chatzy Madness.
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iKomodo: because i'll have to throw one in at some point obvs
MobileDraco: Sunday
Jadeforged of Jashut: sunday sunday, sundayyy
Jadeforged of Jashut: oil paintings oil paintings SEAKIIIING
Jadeforged of Jashut: (this joke is for goops)
Jumpropeman: you beat me to it
Jumpropeman: hank of the hill sits alongside skooks in most rewatchable poops for me
Jumpropeman: I once made my niece cry quoting it-
Jumpropeman: she did not appreciate my hank hill voice...
iKomodo: SEAKING SEAKING SEAKING
RubyChao: sunday, yes
Jadeforged of Jashut: hank of the hill is pretty foundational
---
Jumpropeman: *googles Kothaga*
Jumpropeman: how about that, there's a notable movie in Telugu with the word in the name
RubyChao: you know what you must do jrm
Jumpropeman: apparently it means "new"
RubyChao: it is time for your understanding of language to play a key role
Gooper Blooper: Kothaga Super Mario Bros
Jumpropeman: that was the missing piece all along...
---
Gooper Blooper: So, today Goopsmom had to get her car inspected, and since the place that does it is forty minutes away she brought me along and we made a day of it and swung by the Fairbanks Museum
Gooper Blooper: Pardon, was pulled away for a second for a reason related to this story, but back now
Gooper Blooper: On the way there I shared with Goopsmom how the final two of the Brawl shook out. I usually tell her this the day after but this time the finale was such a complicated story with all the assistants and upgrades that it took until now for me to piece together a version of it she'd understand
Gooper Blooper: She wanted to know which users owned which characters and I told her about Hooded Pitohui. I've mentioned his name before and she always reacts with bafflement and then forgets it
Gooper Blooper: but she's definitely going to remember him this time
Gooper Blooper: The museum has tons of bird taxidermy specimens and she spent a significant portion of our visit looking for a hooded pitohui and continuously flubbing the name to the point it became a running joke
Gooper Blooper: I was pulled away because she was trying to google "red-hooded judihoi" and could not find the bird
RubyChao: ahahahahahaaaaaaa
Gooper Blooper: I had mentioned it had some red on it and she interpreted that as "red-hooded" and went down a rabbit hole of looking up the wrong birds
Gooper Blooper: but I think she's finally got it now
Gooper Blooper: As I went back upstairs she was cuddling Wyatt, her pet chihuahua, and telling him he's her little pitohui
Deadly To The Point of Death: Awww
Draco: The Judihoi...
Jumpropeman: time to make the red-hooded judihoi canon in rp and have it show up to the redhead meeting
NO CID ONLY CLAMS: Next up, she's trying to find Breebroo Crawshanks
NO CID ONLY CLAMS: ...did the museum have a hooded pitohui?
Gooper Blooper: We did not find one.
Gooper Blooper: this is where I would triumphantly link a photo of their specimen, IF THEY HAD ONE
Gooper Blooper: but it's possible we simply managed to miss it, or that they have one in storage
Jumpropeman: he escaped the museum so he could join rp
Mobile Pitohui joined the chat
Jumpropeman: it's him!
Jumpropeman: quick! Get the cage!
Mobile Pitohui: I think you're looking for judihoi. Two doors down. Common mistake.
NO CID ONLY CLAMS: No no, that yellow coated Asian girl who loves malls is even more wrong
Gooper Blooper: She kept pointing at random birds and going "Look, it's a red-hooded [garbles the name weirder every time]!"
---
RubyChao joined the chat
RubyChao: ahoy
Jumpropeman: ahoy hoy
Gooper Blooper: hell friend
Gooper Blooper: HELL FRIEND.
Jumpropeman: HELL FRIEND
RubyChao: HELL FRIEND
Gooper Blooper: that's okuu
MobileDraco: HELL FRIEND
Jumpropeman: everyone's got one
---
Sniffly Harpy: why did i think the tractor cannon would force the crabs to roll tractors
Gooper Blooper rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 21
Gooper Blooper: BAD MOVE
RubyChao rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 2
RubyChao: Carmine and Ademina both died in their attempt to cross.
Jumpropeman: i did select the weapon specifically because my eyes lasered in on the word tractor
Jumpropeman: then I saw its effect and was like "oh, that's a good choice!"
Gooper Blooper: tractors are ruined forever for us
Gooper Blooper: like maple syrup, or video game consoles with cute girls tied to them
MobileDraco rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 1
MobileDraco: Cagliostro successfully killed off.
RubyChao: okay so i think if we actually did apply the tractor cannon to tractor the krabs just kind of win the plot
RubyChao: good thing we didn't :V
Gooper Blooper: Scowl Supremacy
Sniffly Harpy rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 6
Brine: Total Crab Victory
Jumpropeman: so much for me starting to wonder if maybe that would be a cool power to give a character :V
---
RubyChao: oh, that reminds me
RubyChao: i need to share my dream from last night, i woke up at 5 am and told goops, but not the rest
Gooper Blooper: oh god yes
Gooper Blooper: tell them
RubyChao: so, basically, it was a murder mystery
RubyChao: the relevant backstory was that Jim Davis had died (he wasn't murdered, he was just old) and as his estate was gone over for his will and such, people found mysterious letters and documents from the late 1970s implying that someone else had co-created Garfield with him, and that someone else had agreed to give up all credit in exchange for something
RubyChao: so anyway, the setting was a large mansion party
RubyChao: and someone turns up dead! gasp and shock. so, i start investigating (being in the form of Ruukoto, as dreams sometimes do with you) to find out whodunnit
RubyChao: spent a lot of time searching, and finally find hidden in the form of a gun a usb drive
RubyChao: plug it in, and i find pdfs of documentation that prove who the co-creator of garfield was
RubyChao: said co-creator (played by dire from jojo, my secret fiter guy) was actually the killer! the victim had been blackmailing him since the deal would be forfeit if he was publicly outed as co-creator of garfield
RubyChao: so he panicked and killed the victim
RubyChao: then he tried to kill me but i juked around him and managed to avoid him until he got arrested
RubyChao: then i woke up and immediately beelined to tell goops because i did not want to lose this one, lel
RubyChao: also my headcanon is that as a man obsessed with garfield trying to extort money i'm like 99% sure nathen mazri was supposed to be the victim, but that's more "he fits the profile"
Gooper Blooper: Ruukoto vs Dire to solve a Garfield murder mystery
Gooper Blooper: it's as ZFRP as it gets
RubyChao: I think my favorite part is just
RubyChao: the way that "i co-created the funny orange cat strip" is this critical secret that he would kill to keep, because apparently it was THAT VALUABLE , which mean it was THAT IMPORTANT to jim davis to be SOLO author of garfield
---
NO CID ONLY CLAMS: Is the Ron Paul remnant still there?
Gooper Blooper: yep
---
Gooper Blooper: donkey kong bananza anecdote: Every Saturday, Goopsbro takes me to Walmart so I can buy groceries. Last week when I came out to the car with the purchases, he had the trunk locked and wouldn't open it until I stomped my feet like DK and did the Pauline purple tape removal "OoooooWOAAAAHHHH"
Sniffly Harpy: god damn it goopsbro
LizardJade: nerd
Jumpropeman: go to the fruit aisle
Jumpropeman: "ohhh banana" on repeat
iKomodo: good lord
LizardJade: oh banana but at different speeds and pitches
Gooper Blooper: "Look, a banana!"
LizardJade: i need to negotiate bananza plot with cw
LizardJade: i have an in
LizardJade: a way to make it work
LizardJade: :U
---
Draco: "Listen up, I've got a brilliant plan-" <- Five hospitals later...
---
Cornwind Evil: "while Zeldoten made like a Brawl Champ and got out of there in the first place"
Cornwind Evil rages.
---
Gooper Blooper: nervous but also excited about the next event
Gooper Blooper: haven't been this fired up for my own RP in a while
Gooper Blooper: all I had to do was make a lobster cry
Jumpropeman: i forgot to say while pitohui was here
Jumpropeman: why are you all attacking my good girls
Gooper Blooper: so that you can save them, JRM
Gooper Blooper: I've been doing "cute GB girl in distress, come save her" plots since Season 1
Jumpropeman: yeah, i'd like to save them, but can it be from "not having enough money for the carnival" next time ; w ;
Jumpropeman: *brine swaps sunny with tornado being kidnapped again just to lay it on thicker*
RubyChao: Luckly, as JRM does not like any of my new girls, I can simply throw them in the blender without an issue
RubyChao: petra will get kidnapped and it'll be funny
Jumpropeman: literally top image when i opened pinterest
RubyChao: i said NEW girls
RubyChao: we all know you like peko
Jumpropeman: i know, but your girls tend to need time to grow
Jumpropeman: at first I was like
Jumpropeman: Kanade? WHATEVER
Jumpropeman: and then I became a stan
Jumpropeman: Ademina's been getting more interesting lately, and Grace, funnily enough both helped by the Shadows
RubyChao: all i had to do was make ademina disapprove of inherited wealth and suddenly everyone likes her
RubyChao: hmm...
---
Sniffly Harpy: post of the shit kind
---
Cornwind Evil: We managed the Garbage achievement!
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Draco: "I had taken up arms a long time ago to resist an oppressor, but it was not me who fell that threat." <- He missed out on saving the Pope. :(
Jumpropeman: legit almost considered Lark being able to control people with his spores before I realized where that was heading XP
Draco: Two more years of Mushroom Gods.
---
Same Juices: I have tea
Same Juices: I don't like tea
Sniffly Harpy: what flavor?
Sniffly Harpy: i usually like the lemon ginger flavors for helping with colds
Same Juices: lemon zinger
Sniffly Harpy: can you at least tolerate it?
Same Juices: tastes like hot water that maybe had a lemon look at it once
---
Metro Sheep: Oh right. Ran into this.
Metro Sheep: For the maid fans in the chat
Gooper Blooper: is
Gooper Blooper: is this Mega Man Legends But It's Ruukoto
Metro Sheep: yes
RubyChao: Remember when people said there'd never be nostalgia for the blocky low-poly models of the PS1, Dreamcast, and N64?
RubyChao: added to the pile.
Gooper Blooper: yeah I think you gotta play this one chao
Gooper Blooper: That youtube channel is full of animated shorts about these characters
Jumpropeman: even though I didn't rate Mega Man Legends highly, it is such a specific game mood
Gooper Blooper: apparently they were just posting them with no context and then surprise, it was for their vidya
Jumpropeman: very lovely
Gooper Blooper: I think it's one of those games where even if you don't think it's particularly good you can see why it has a little fanbase of people who are very fond of it
RubyChao: "Is there words for being bamboozled and betrayed but like... for good? Everything was just the prelude to this. Fucking. Ace"
RubyChao: love that comment
RubyChao: becuase yeah "here's a bunch of cute animated shorts... BUT IT'S ACTUALLY FOR A GAME ABOUT THEM" is a perfect example
Gooper Blooper: even this meido game looks kinda clunky but in an endearing way
Metro Sheep: just like Ruukoto
Jumpropeman: i like that the moment I saw her face I was like "oh yeah this IS mega man legends"
Gooper Blooper: https://youtube.com/watch?v=aN6MSxRd4Us
RubyChao: i am excited for my plans for Ruukoto next brawl.
RubyChao: they're gonna be good.
Metro Sheep: That "Voila!"
Gooper Blooper: ruukoto becomes a javelina farmer
Metro Sheep: Finally, a game for me
RubyChao: the way the vacuum cleaner is even built into her arm... it's just a less lethal version of Ruukoto's arm weapons
Metro Sheep: I mean, we don't know she doesn't NOT have a buzzsaw...
Jumpropeman: ruukoto's use of the brawl money: making herself a new sister
Metro Sheep: "This is Merry Maid. I made it out of Snake and some Steamworks Magic."
RubyChao: I will never get tired of Ruukoto's winning move being the "I put this in for when she dies in the Brawl. Not if, when" tool
RubyChao: I've mentioned this to a few people but here's a neat fact: due to how absolutely fucked up it was, Ruukoto did not rebuild her BBB15 body, she just got a completely new one
RubyChao: however she saved what was left of the BBB15 body and has it in a place of pride in Bulgrave's mansion, like you might with an army uniform of prominence
Gooper Blooper: When we visited the museum last week, Goopsmom commented on her driving, saying "I may not always be the best at navigation, but I get you there in one piece"
Gooper Blooper: Since this was the trip where I'd told her about BBB15 on the way down, I replied "Yeah, it wouldn't do much good if we got to the museum looking like Ruukoto after she won the Brawl" and goopsmom concurred
RubyChao: heeeeh
RubyChao: I honestly think she set a record for most damaged brawl winner
RubyChao: no head, no legs, no clothes, no skin, no heart
Gooper Blooper: How exactly is anyone supposed to beat that
Gooper Blooper: I think that record will stand for life
Gooper Blooper: I guess technically if Maple had won and was reduced to a six-inch mini-Maple at the end, that would be more total body lost
Metro Sheep: A metric that won't be surpassed until Mr. Potato Head's Brawl run.
Jumpropeman: what if ruukoto won again and was even more wrecked
RubyChao: just a tiny little AI core rolling around alone
---
Metro Sheep: Yes, punch Walpurgis
Metro Sheep: make him suffer
Metro Sheep: he had it coming
---
Draco: I will be back later, but I'm not sure who will still be here when I do get back, so good night!
Gooper Blooper: I'm gonna shuffle on out myself
Gooper Blooper: nite
Metro Sheep: Seeya
Metro Sheep: I think I'd better go as well
Metro Sheep left the chat
Jumpropeman: night
Metro Sheep left the chat
Jumpropeman: sheep AND sheep left!
Gooper Blooper: The whole flock, gone!
Jumpropeman: this sheepdog ain't pulling his weight
Jumpropeman: beginning to think he's actually a pig!
Gooper Blooper: Worse
Gooper Blooper: a javelina
Jumpropeman: sacre bleau!
Draco: Sacre Javalina!
---
Molasses Killed Abe Lincoln: Antipope is a term that's too metal sounding for what it is
RubyChao: antipopes and popes can never come into contact
Molasses Killed Abe Lincoln: Or we'll get a pop
(later)
RubyChao: man
RubyChao: it's been a day and i'm still laughing over Pope Donus II
RubyChao: imagine being so bad at record keeping you invent an imaginary pope and then everyone just buys it for centuries
Hooded Pitohui: I greatly enjoyed encountering Donus II yesterday.
Jumpropeman: i should have named my pope Donus III
Corn Is Apparently Explosive: Reminds me of that joke where a new priest is being shown a holy book that has been copied word for word for eons and he asks if there has ever been a mistake and his teacher goes and finds the OG copy and the newcomer later finds him weeping and going "IT SAYS CELEBRATE!"
Gooper Blooper: I just came out of review mode to do a "JRM's pope shoulda been Donus III" joke
Gooper Blooper: well done
---
Gooper Blooper: we've come a long way from a lobster being a sign of evil, cheating, and dirty tricks
Draco: Crabs are the real master criminals anyway.
Jumpropeman: but what about the giant friend crab
Jumpropeman: what we really need to watch for
Jumpropeman: are shrimp
I GOT TOILET MICE: I can't recall lobsters ever being one of the 'evil' animals
I GOT TOILET MICE: It was like, rats, and snakes, and reptiles in general...
Gooper Blooper: I was referring to ZFRP specifically, thanks to Hardcore Prawn
I GOT TOILET MICE: OH YES YOU'RE RIGHT
I GOT TOILET MICE: HANG HERRRRRRRRRR
I GOT TOILET MICE throws a rope at Lobco
Gooper Blooper: I did the biggest plot in ZFRP history and the boss at the end of like sixty events was a lobster with a gun
Gooper Blooper: and it worked
Draco: Well, I guess Lobco is done for.
I GOT TOILET MICE: In another universe, it was pudding with a gun
I GOT TOILET MICE: It did not
---
N Goat: Client in bed. I can look again.
Harpsy: tell your client good boy
N Goat: Human client today :€
Harpsy: oh.
Harpsy: still tell them good boy-
N Goat: Haha
---
Jumpropeman: last night I felt like looking up the short story the lovecraftian creature known as the Hound of Tindalos came from
Jumpropeman: read the first line
RubyChao: was it really racist?
Jumpropeman: "“I’m glad you came,” said Chalmers."
RubyChao: OH NO.
Gooper Blooper: the luncheon is on the other foot now, seymour
---
N Goat: "There exists a fun little concept where artists take the designs of various video game consoles and turn them into human characters called Console-tans."
N Goat: Disgusting!
Jumpropeman: oh my
Jumpropeman: who'd do such a thing
Draco: Degenerates.
---
(Chao visits a food truck called "The Little Sicilian")
RubyChao: ate at this food truck today, you know why i link it
Metroid Sheep: Sicicilian rice balls?!
Metroid Sheep: Huh.
Jumpropeman: the little sicilian is what yohane calls lanterby to get a rise out of her
Draco: Little Sicilian (affectionate)
---
Jumpropeman: man
Jumpropeman: this is really bad cover art
Jumpropeman: this is a screenshot of the game in action
Jumpropeman: for some reason they chose for the cover to be a screen where, to clear a stage, you have to input some symbols you find throughout the stage on a computer
Gooper Blooper: that is indeed one of the worst boxarts I've ever seen
Gooper Blooper: it's not even funny bad, they just decided to make the blandest box possible
RubyChao: yeah like
RubyChao: bad box art mega man is iconic but it's so fun bad
RubyChao: that's just Dull
Jumpropeman: mega man can still catch the eye too
Jumpropeman: Zillion looks like it's a microwave manual or something
Gooper Blooper: A lot of Master System boxarts are terrible, IIRC. A bunch of them just do that boring white grid background and waste space proclaiming it's THE MEGA CARTRIDGE instead of showing us what it looks like
Jumpropeman: link
Gooper Blooper: I remember seeing one in an old issue of EGM that was just a cartoon foot shoved into the far bottom corner (it was some kind of karate game)
Gooper Blooper: yeah, see?
Gooper Blooper: at least that one has a silly cartoon in the corner
Jumpropeman: link
Gooper Blooper: that's it!
Jumpropeman: yeah, I like pro wrestling's cover because it's silly, but I've seen it in "worst box art" collections
Gooper Blooper: Sega had no idea what they were doing in the 80s...
Gooper Blooper: (they still had no idea what they were doing in the 90s but at least they were more fun about it than bland white grids)
Jumpropeman: then there were sega cards
Jumpropeman: Spy vs Spy out here bucking the trend
Jumpropeman: sega cards at least had the excuse of making sure the customer didn't buy the wrong thing
---
Jumpropeman: "[Pro Wrestling] enjoyed considerably more popularity in the United States than it did in Japan. It was ranked 172 on Nintendo Power's Top 200 Nintendo Games Ever. Nintendo never ventured into the Wrestling market again, but the game has been announced as a possible Wii Virtual Console candidate."
Jumpropeman: oh boy, I hope it comes to it!
Gooper Blooper: It's possible!
Jumpropeman: oh dang, this is the A Winner Is You game
---
Diapia: I need to get back into mabi :(
Diapia: *immediately boots up warframe instead*
---
Metroid Sheep: little srspost
Metroid Sheep: Leon is a loser
Metroid Sheep: this is correct
Metroid Sheep: please mock him as such
Gooper Blooper: so they're finally here
businessing for you
if you signed a deal you can join in too
put your papers together if you wanna clap
as we take you through this kitty rap
HC
HORUS CORP
This Horus right here, is just one man
He bets it all, on his powerful Stand
But recently his Stand has changed
And now he doesn't know how it's arranged
He's used up all of his vacation days
And spent them at home in a depressed daze
If you're looking for a Horus to increase your wealth
Best to put your money on someone else
HUH
Jumpropeman: "Leon, someone wrote a song about you!"
"Really? That might be the thing I need to get pep back into my step-"
Metroid Sheep: Never bet on Leon
Diapia: AND HERE'S LEON
Diapia: HE'S dead.
Metroid Sheep: HE'S depressed.
Diapia: the true depression elemental
Metroid Sheep: Something something I'M ALREADY NEGATIVE
Diapia: queen bee couldn't think of a single good thing to say about him.
Gooper Blooper: Now this Horus here's a bit of a wimp
But don't you ever dare call her a shrimp
This lobster knows money like the back of her hand
She can cut a good deal, and make a good plan
She can use Lobstacle when she's gotta fight
To protect and defend, she'll steer you all right
This is a Horus you'll want to keep in mind
Just ask Felicia - she's one of a kind!
HUH
Gooper Blooper: probably not doing everyone but had to do a verse for the favorite :V
Metroid Sheep: I don't know if I ever said, but the art for the food critic in Whalestrand came from a One Piece spinoff manga of a single voume, focusing on Sanji. It was by the Food Wars guy.
Jumpropeman: I wanted to ask you to do one!
Jumpropeman: I just felt like I was asking too much
Jumpropeman: good stuff goop
---
Jumpropeman: I have reached the part of Bleach with Bambietta
Jumpropeman: i look forward to her golfing adventures!
RubyChao: boom!
Metroid Sheep: D-did you watch all of Bleach to get there?!
RubyChao: this man read all of Food Wars to reach Lanterby.
Diapia: vibe
Metroid Sheep: But did you meet Attwater's faceclaim
Metroid Sheep: Woof. I don't know if I could do ALL of Food Wars.
Diapia: sheep slowly turning into the dogs he has been dogsitting
Metroid Sheep: wan wan
Jumpropeman: ive been reading bleach
Jumpropeman: considering like, a volume takes maybe 20 minutes to read, when each chapter is usually like an episode's worth of content, reading really is the way to go!
---
Gooper Blooper: the grace/ademina push continues
Metro Sheep: Some kind of...financially destitute cactus
Gooper Blooper: she's never going to escape the cactus ball allegations, is she
RubyChao: don't blame me
RubyChao: blame sheep wanting to keep provoking ademina
RubyChao: speaking of, fun trivia fact:
RubyChao: if Walpurgis had actually stuck to talking about himself, Ademina would have been okay with it. She begrudges the Shadows (the institution), and Lord Grandfather (embodiment of that instutitution and all its problems), but she doesn't have grudges against All Of Them Individually
RubyChao: however his immediate attempt to "fix" her perception ruined it.
Metro Sheep: Walpurgis: "I can fix her."
Metro Sheep he can't
---
Metro Sheep: Can't wait for Hannah to summon a crucible on this cat.
Brine: "Watch out, everybody! I'm making a cat crate!"
(later)
Metro Sheep: "conjuring up a very small scale empty Crucible"
Metro Sheep: I WAS JOKING
---
Metro Sheep: "Alright! We've learned something today! Is it useful? No idea!"
Metro Sheep: The Sheeplot experience.
---
Diapia: how about
Diapia: we go
Diapia: "pspspspsps" at the cat
Gooper Blooper: *PSP shows up instead*
Diapia: i mean that is also
Diapia: A way
Jumpropeman: psp and the squirrels, what could pawsibly go wrong
---
Jumpropeman: the game I'm playing has a library in the city where any books you find in your travel are added and you're paid a finder's fee for collecting them. Not sure my grandpa will approve when I give them his diary though
Deadly To The Point of Death: Oh no
Jumpropeman: librarian gave me 200 gold for it!
Hooded Pitohui: Must've been a spicy diary
Gooper Blooper: but was the librarian Gloria or Patchouli
Jumpropeman: the main character's name is Marisa so
Jumpropeman: I hope it's not Patchouli
Diapia: marisa-pilled
---
Cornwind Evil: You know what sucks and is draining? Going out in 40 degree heat
Cornwind Evil: You know what is mildly dumb? Doing it two days in a row.
Cornwind Evil: So that's why I have been AWOL the last few days.
Cornwind Evil: I don't know how you do your hours long walks Chao
RubyChao: stamina and radio
Cornwind Evil: In 35+ heat? How much water do you go through?
RubyChao: not much, i generally just get something to drink when i get lunch or dinner, and if i'm really dry i'll grab a gatorade or something on the way
RubyChao: but i don't need a constant hydration
Cornwind Evil: Chao's a darn camel
Metro Sheep: A
Metro Sheep: a Chaomel.
Gooper Blooper: *Sheep sips water IRONICALLY*
Metro Sheep: I'll have you know I'm a great enjoyer of water
Cornwind Evil: Pretty sure all of us are
---
Gooper Blooper: Gabriella now
Jumpropeman: somehow we convinced god she deserves to stay on earth...
Gooper Blooper: that image was our argument
Gooper Blooper: APPROVED
Diapia: boigar
MobileDraco: Mabel would punch God twice to keep her angel friend.
---
RubyChao: remember when Lanterby swore at the pope
Gooper Blooper: remember when Quin demanded the pope take a shower
---
Draco: Last post unless either of you really needs me to make another one.
Gooper Blooper: I need a post about Momoyo eating a sandwich
Jumpropeman: it will be ready in eight to ten business days
(Draco makes a post about Momoyo eating a sandwich)
Draco: barpost
Gooper Blooper: you have my gratitude draco
Jumpropeman: he just gave you that post for free...
Gooper Blooper: now I can sleep peacefully knowing momoyo got to have a nice sandwich
Jumpropeman: he charges me sixty bucks for momoyo posts D:
Jumpropeman: night goop
Draco: Bye Goops.
Draco: JRM: Yeah, and you keep paying. BI
Jumpropeman: i need my centipede
Gooper Blooper: https://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/8674876
Draco: Your tab's still not paid, by the way. I'd hate for Momoyo to have an...accident. *holds up a shoe*
Jumpropeman: don't do it! She's barefoot and free!
Draco: I'd hate for her to have to wear fifty pairs of Crocs.
---
Gooper Blooper: by the way
Gooper Blooper: I don't always ask, but
Gooper Blooper: JRM, Google gave me nothing, I need a source for that new sig
Diapia: he's getting niche-y over here huh
Gooper Blooper: JRM's sigs are like a much less often updated ticker that looks at the entire english-speaking world instead of RP
Draco: He doesn't archive them though. :I
Jumpropeman: it's from Laid Back Camp Volume 2. A poster for a new book in the library that likely wasn't meant to be too closely looked at but I couldn't help but love that tagline
RubyChao: it really does feel like a 90s/00s animated tagline
Jumpropeman: RIDICULOUS DOG ACTION
RubyChao: i can hear that peppy voice going "All of America is barking with ridiculous dog action!"
Gooper Blooper: link
Jumpropeman: =o
Jumpropeman: *BARKS!*
Gooper Blooper: get a load of that ridiculous dog action
Jumpropeman: got something to look forward to down the line it seems
Gooper Blooper: weirdly the synopsis just talks about girls going camping
Gooper Blooper: nothing about dogs
Jumpropeman: I meant there was a library IN the book
Diapia: you go to the library so much we kinda figured you meant the irl library
Jumpropeman: a fair inference
Gooper Blooper: Oh! Yeah, I thought you meant the library you visit all the time had a poster advertising Laid Back Camp 2's ridiculous dog action
Jumpropeman: there's an anime night every month at the library for teenagers
Jumpropeman: meaning I see this anime girl on the posters every time I browse the manga section where it hangs
---
Jumpropeman: spat after winning Drown Yer Mates
Gooper Blooper: with sheep's clear affection for Spat I'm surprised he still hasn't Brawled
Draco: Democurus took the slot.
Jumpropeman: Spat's waiting for the perfect year when his best friend, Parsee, enters
Metro Sheep: One day...one day.
Gooper Blooper: you know he'd want to try and tear up an alliance just for kicks
Metro Sheep: Man.
Metro Sheep: Ham Ham Heartbreak was a good game.
Jumpropeman: rub it in why dontcha >:I
Jumpropeman: one day I shall sample the ambrosia
---
Jumpropeman: just noticed in the Brawl sticky notes that usually mark when character die, I had two I never updated... but for good reason
Jumpropeman: "47 ALLISON/ANGELICA DEAD?"
"55 FRANCINE/EDGAR DEADISH"
Jumpropeman: I never went back to update it because Edgar and Allison continued on so long after such things would be needed
---
Jumpropeman: I've done something terrible on Wplace
Jumpropeman: I lived in lubbock for a few years, wasn't a great place, so I went over there and made a set of Loss lines
Jumpropeman: in my defense
Jumpropeman: they had it coming
Draco: My god, JRM, why would you be so merciful?
---
N Goat: "Tatami Nakagame"
N Goat: YOU DIDN'T!
N Goat: "Her body pulls into itself!"
N Goat: IT IS!
N Goat goes wild
Jumpropeman: but sheep, this isn't praline!
(later)
Gooper Blooper: link
Jumpropeman: she sometimes does that around the house for fun
Gooper Blooper finds a listicle titled "10 Useless My Hero Academia Characters Who Do Absolutely Nothing"
Gooper Blooper: She's number five
Gooper Blooper: "Tatami accomplished nothing at all."
Jumpropeman: that's why we love her <3
Jumpropeman: I still have one volume of My Hero to read, I'm sure this will be her big chance to do something!!!
(later)
Jumpropeman: link
Gooper Blooper: we will burn through the entire internet's supply of non-porn images of Tatami by the end of the event
RubyChao: guess we'd better start linking the porn
Draco: Darn. :3c
Jumpropeman: we'll advance the anime frame by frame and link each individual shot
Jumpropeman: still wouldn't be a lot...
Gooper Blooper: I enjoy that JRM made her a cardholder so that her power is enhanced enough to actually be pretty decent in a fight
---
RubyChao: "YEAH, WHAT HE SAID! THAT MUSHROOM'S THE REAL UNHOLY THING HERE!"
Gabriella pauses for a second, then continues shouting.
"OTHER LIVING MUSHROOMS ARE COOL THOUGH! IT'S JUST THAT ONE.
Anyhow your symbol of God's grace is going to take care of the problem!"
Confident that she has not accidentally introduced anti-mushroom rhetoric into the canon of the Catholic church
RubyChao: i found this again and it makes me laugh every time
RubyChao: gabby being Responsible
Gooper Blooper: Gabby is simultaneously the best and worst angel and that is 100% what makes her character work
---
Jumpropeman: now that's how you wrap up a plot
Jumpropeman: dr pepper and shrek
---
N Goat: Bondo...will return.
Jumpropeman: Tatami drags him into relevance-
N Goat: Because Tatami talked to him, so I need to do a return post at some point
Draco: Good.
Draco: Tatamiplot 2025-2026 off-season.
N Goat: Felics, regrettably, will continue to sneak into posts. We're sorry for the incinvenience.
Jumpropeman: Tatami and her BEST FRIEND Bondo
Jumpropeman: Felics can slip through the tiniest of cracks
Jumpropeman: remember to use sealant on your corners
---
Jonkey Kong: hey chao
Jonkey Kong: question
RubyChao: yo
RubyChao: hmm?
Jonkey Kong: is star fox deader than f zero
RubyChao: i would legitimately say yes
RubyChao: f-zero 99 was surprisingly successful, has been alive for a surprisingly long time, and has been getting updates - as recently as 4 months ago they gave it a big update
RubyChao: in some form, f-zero is being Remembered and Acknowledged
RubyChao: star fox... hasn't really had anything since starlink
---
Jumpropeman: chao
Jumpropeman: I have a confession
RubyChao: hmm?
Jumpropeman: you bought me that copy of Bubsy 3D, but it didn't work. I bought a second copy to play it way back then
RubyChao: ...You know.
RubyChao: Somehow, for Bubsy 3D, that's incredibly fitting.
RubyChao: Surprised you never told me tho
Jumpropeman: I didn't want you to feel bad!
Jumpropeman: gooper is still devastated Shrek Treasure Hunt doesn't work
RubyChao: thaaat's fair
RubyChao: it really is ok though
RubyChao: it's fuckin' Bubsy anyway
Jumpropeman: I did buy a loose disc though, so I appreciate I still have a case for it thanks to you
Jumpropeman: I hate loose discs
RubyChao: "You may think this is some defense of Bubsy 3D, that I’m being an apologist and forgiving it for this terrible transfer into the third dimension. I merely wanted to give you some context that, for a game made in an era where a certain level of patience and understanding is required…
Bubsy 3D is still absolute utter garbage with no excuse for how bad it turned out."
Jumpropeman: that new Bubsy collection is actually adding camera controls and regular movement as a bonus feature if you want to see how the game "should" play
RubyChao: however jrm, i say this with love
RubyChao: and recognition of a review written ten years ago, when the statement was true at the time:
RubyChao: "It is no coincidence though that while nostalgic throwbacks to 8, 16, and other bits can go over well, a PS1 era graphic style in a modern game is usually a sign of incompetence rather than a tribute to an era that was really full of first steps into an unfamiliar world." - It's kind of funny how at this point, no, it really is nostalgic throwbacks these days
RubyChao: just had to have the right people hit the nostalgia benchmark
RubyChao: but like we are absolutely in the era of low-poly 3d being Fun and Classic
Jumpropeman: I do sometimes wonder when I mention like, a modern trend or whatever in a review these days. Like sometimes you call something a unique twist and then the next few years everyone's doing it, ya know?
Jumpropeman: you know the weirdest thing about the bubsy 3d review
Jumpropeman: is there isn't even like, a single standard screenshot of gameplay
---
RubyChao: at the retro game expo i saw the wii u in the retro console lineup
RubyChao: and NOW i will accept it being there
RubyChao: switch 2 allows it
---
Jumpropeman: most recent one piece chapter blindsided me when a background character said "adorbs"
N Goat: Was it adorbs?
N Goat: Slang can be startling
Jumpropeman: my guess it was a mix of having a small speech bubble and the fact it was one of like six characters fawning over a woman in slightly different ways
---
Jumpropeman: "Perhaps by the end of the year, we'll ALL be Tapus!" Tapu Lele leading all the smallified elementals around with those kid leashes
Brine: The aftermath of their Brawl run next year- some flying around, some in front, Rain and Cinder going the opposite direction
---
Metro Sheep: I believe the kids call this one a "shitpost".
Draco: Don't forget to wipe.
---
Gooper Blooper: https://danbooru.donmai.us/posts/4719024
Jumpropeman: *shoves aside the first link* that wedding dress lobco is too cute
---
Metro Sheep squinting through old papers
Metro Sheep: Hey, remember when I decided to tackle the hardest poetic form in existence; the sestina; to write about FISHSTICKS
Metro Sheep goes back to digging through papers
Jumpropeman: sounds like you just had the right inspiration
Metro Sheep: I must be sleep deprived, because I'm seriously considering sending it in with my theatre scene scripts
---
Student Gangs/Vicious Bosses: "Imagine being the space pirate who sent that distress signal and it attracts the attention of the single worst person it possibly could for you. That'd be like calling the police and then Jason Voorhees shows up."
---
DelverHarpy: god damn, i keep triggering the undead
DelverHarpy: first sabrieye, then justine, now litr
DelverHarpy: i'm going to get canceled on twitter at this rate
Jumpropeman: Litr's got a really weird relationship with his means of death though
Jumpropeman: Mud walks in on Litr looking at pictures of bonfires on the computer-
Gooper Blooper brings back Laila just so she can get triggered by deep harp galactic
DelverHarpy: are you looking at FIRE PORN ON THE INTERNET
DelverHarpy: at least SHARE
Jumpropeman: link
DelverHarpy: aw yeah, that's the stuff
Hooded Pitohui: Woo, getting steamy in here tonight-
Jumpropeman: he keeps buying Cinder scarves while waving from across the bar
DelverHarpy: when we said fan the flames, we didn't mean that way
Gooper Blooper: JRM dragging deep lore out of a dwarf who exists for one sentence in his source material so that Thor can kick him into a fire for no fucking reason is peak ZFRP
Jumpropeman: I like to think whoever took the time to draw him long ago was my Norse equivalent
Jumpropeman: Litr got lit
Gooper Blooper: I remember we joked that all it's missing is a big red "KO"
RubyChao: i distinctly recall me editing it to have a big red KO and all of us just going "yeah that's a Brawl KO image"
RubyChao: lemme see
RubyChao: here we are
RubyChao: NOW it's art
Jumpropeman: if litr enters the brawl
Jumpropeman: I know what I must do
---
DelverHarpy: last round because lore!
DelverHarpy: lore is coming!
Hooded Pitohui: Briefly misread that as "Lorne is coming"
Gooper Blooper: The friend for liiiiiife~
---
Gooper Blooper: "Anansi shrunk in size to" suit her mood?
DelverHarpy: SHUT UP IT IS SERIOUS TIME-
Draco: "Darkness descended. " <- It usually takes a few drinks first.
DelverHarpy: my serious moment, robbed-
Student Gangs/Vicious Bosses: NIGHTMARE ROCK, I'VE COME TO BARGAIN.
---
Phoneharbees: the adoptive daughters try to figure out what kinda ring fiona wants without letting crim know
Phoneharbees: Until they find out, anyway
Jumpropeman: Sivvy: "Whoops, my earth powers caused a bunch of rare earth gems to spill on the ground! NAOMI, WHICH ONE DID FIONA LOOK AT LONGEST???"
Phoneharbees: Naomi: *staring at the fire stone* uuuuuuuh
Jumpropeman: Naomi, we'll do this again when haymar proposes don't worry-
Phoneharbees: Hakra and Kiwii are better at this. Sofie too
Jumpropeman: "Hey Naomi, will you make me the happiest girl in the world-" "I DO!" "...and uh... get some coffee after training today?" "...oh right of course >_>"
Phoneharbees: "STARBUNKS"
---
Jumpropeman: the only reason I'm ready for the PS6 is my PS5 controller struggles to hold a charge and I don't want to give up my firstborn for a replacement
---
Jumpropeman: "I'd like to explore Brawl Mountain one day." *looks at the pile of dust and rubble left*
Draco: She can go visit Guppystrand instead! :D
---
Steel Komodo: Attami too thicc to ride dinosaurs
Gooper Blooper: pull over dat ass 2 phat
Steel Komodo: oh yes that reminds me
Steel Komodo: yesterday when we went to see the godzilla film with the kobber in it, we ate at a place called phat buns
Steel Komodo: and all i could think was "ah, the sephine restaurant"
Steel Komodo: although i guess i have to update the reference now :P
Gooper Blooper: Josie is a classic but the GB vault of thicc runs deep-
Jumpropeman: *slaps gooper's profiles* this cast can fit so many thicc chicks
MobileDraco: Attami can only ride her girlfriend.
---
Jumpropeman: "Your Yahoo mail storage limits have changed! You have used 3 MB of your 20 GB!" oh dang, better pay before it's too late!
Steel Komodo: lmao
RubyChao: that actually did affect my job :V they use a single yahoo mail account and it had way more than 20 gb when yahoo cut the storage
RubyChao: so they had to pay for more
---
(Concerning Jade moving away from using Eidolons in RP and saying they were Stands instead)
Jumpropeman: it's like how we suddenly realized there are three more giraffe species in the world recently
Jumpropeman: we realized there are actually more Spirit Dudes Who Stand Next To You
PhoneJade: Lmao that's true
RubyChao: wait what
PhoneJade: Oh shit
PhoneJade: Chao there's more giraffes than we knew about
RubyChao: secret giraffes??
PhoneJade: SECRET GIRAFFES
Jumpropeman: they've been pulling the wool over our eyes
Gooper Blooper: there may in fact be as many as eight giraffes
RubyChao: that is WILD
Jumpropeman: the giraffe invasion was quiet, slow, and inevitable
RubyChao: you always think of these sorts of species redefinitions in terms of, like, ancient species (hello dinosaurs)
RubyChao: weird to think about it when you're looking at modern day ones
RubyChao: also jrm that just makes me remember the scp that was literally Giraffe Hell
RubyChao: as in Hell, For Giraffes Who Sinned
Jumpropeman: the nice thing about that bbc article is you look at all four giraffes and are like "yeah, I see it"
RubyChao: yeah, i see it
Gooper Blooper: I grew up knowing there were two different kinds of elephants, then one day I looked and saw there are actually three known species
Mobile Pitohui (Hooded Pitohui) joined the chat
Mobile Pitohui (Hooded Pitohui) joined the chat
RubyChao: biology talk summoned him...
Gooper Blooper: and the third one was scientifically described in 1900, so it wasn't even new, just none of the books I read ever talked about it
RubyChao: The African Elephant, the Indian Elephant, and the Forbidden Elephant
Gooper Blooper: it was this one
Jumpropeman: elephants never forget, but this one... was forgotten
Gooper Blooper: African bush elephant is the one we always hear about
Gooper Blooper: African forest elephant, no one gives a damn
Jumpropeman: no one is talking about the elephant in the forest
Draco: T̴͉̿ḧ̸̤́e̸̖̒ ̸̽͜F̵̧͂o̴̬͠r̷̹̈́b̷̼͑i̷̼̎d̷͓̅d̶͔̍e̷͕͌n̴̨̿ ̷̹͑E̶̟͆ľ̸̼e̸̛͇p̴̮͘h̴͐ͅa̷͚̎n̵̪̈́t̷̫͝
---
Gooper Blooper: Tennessee being the one and only state to collapse into a post-apocalyptic hellhole of warring mafias continues to deeply amuse me
Gooper Blooper: all the other states are fine
Gooper Blooper: It's just Tennessee.
RubyChao: i like to think Eggerman was just "man I do not even know where to START with that."
Draco: President Clownpiece will trade Tennessee for Zanzibar.
Brine: Next year, we'll learn all about the squabbling factions of Arkansas- It really did sort of shake out that all this weirdness is just coming from one wide state, lol. Shogo's got her popcorn ready for Benedictine's downfall so she can point and laugh.
Draco: Tennessee better get ready to be ruled over by the Queen of Stages.
---
Jumpropeman: alright, Gale is complete I think
Draco: Beautiful! ;o;
Gooper Blooper: Meredith and Gale... <3
Jumpropeman: the OGs
Gooper Blooper: and still two of the best characters ever
Draco: Someone has drawn hearts around them. I wonder who~
Jumpropeman: Gale: *flops on the counter*
Gooper: "legendary"
Gooper Blooper: I know peak when I see it
Jumpropeman: I thought it might be you draco based on how many more hearts gale has than meredith
Draco: You found me out.
Draco: It WAS me. :3
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