Monday, August 19, 2013

Chatzy Madness Volume 69: Free Bags of Children

Harpy: anyway, i'm kind of scared of that whole giant group at Facility H, so I'm trying to find a more pacifistic way of handling it
Harpy: finally, Carlos does something else
Gooper Blooper: Don't worry Harpy
Gooper Blooper: I'm raising the stakes appropriately
Gooper Blooper: If they bring an army, so do we
Harpy: then I imagining Ariel lifting giant steaks
SteelKomodo: ...eeeek
Gooper Blooper: MIGHTY ARIEL
Gooper Blooper: Can Ariel lift a steak so big even Josephine cannot eat it
Harpy: Alex might be able to help a bit with that
Harpy: the army I mean, not the steak
Gooper Blooper: what, not both?

---

Cornwind Evil: It's time for more 'Weird Dreams With Cornwind'
SteelKomodo: oh boy D:
Cornwind Evil: In MMO's, you are given quests to do stuff
SteelKomodo: of course
Cornwind Evil: So I dreamed that real life had something where every year we were given quests
Cornwind Evil: And last year (in the dream) I did some quests for some weirdo I will call Mr. Centipede. That was not actually his name but it is what I will call him.
Harpy: if we were given quests every year, I would clearly do quests for Sir Pantsalot
Cornwind Evil: Anyway, the idea is since its a new year the quest givers will have new reQuests
Cornwind Evil: It is a world of quests
SteelKomodo: queeeeests
Cornwind Evil: But not The World Of Quest
SteelKomodo: Poor Quest :P
Cornwind Evil: Anyway, Mr. Centipede wants the EXACT SAME THINGS as last year
Cornwind Evil: Which I think was some apples and a bag of potatoes
SteelKomodo: ...what a jerk D:<
Cornwind Evil: Anyway it's one of those weird dreams where you alternate between observing/directing events and being in them
SteelKomodo: i've had those
Cornwind Evil: Anyway, once I get the things I go inside Mr. Centipede's house
Cornwind Evil: And basically it's a nightmare Wonderland
Cornwind Evil: And its weird.
Cornwind Evil: The thing that comes into my head is 'Jesus Christ I'm going to die.'
Cornwind Evil: Not in a 'Mr. Centipede is dangerous and wishes me harm' sense
Cornwind Evil: But in a 'Dear god I am doing favors for an alien or otherdimensional being who is trying to pretend to be human to blend in and getting WAY TOO MANY THINGS OFF AND WRONG' way
Cornwind Evil: 'And he is going to shoot me because he doesn't understand how things work or something'
Cornwind Evil: That's the part I really remember. That Mr. Centipede wasn't just incredibly weird, but something pretending to be human
SteelKomodo: eek D:
Cornwind Evil: It's probably from me interacting with M Sheep a lot
Cornwind Evil: He's fond of those sorts of things
SteelKomodo: I was gonna say this sounds very much like something Sheep would come up with :P
Cornwind Evil: This has been more 'Weird Dreams With Cornwind'
SteelKomodo: indeed it has
Harpy: welp

---

Harpy: holy shit that is a tiny elf
SteelKomodo: IT IS SO TINY

---

Gooper Blooper: good evening
Cornwind Evil: Now you need to draw Widow Maker dressed like Alfred Hitchcock
Gooper Blooper: Alfred Hitchcock does not have a monopoly on "good evening". :I

---

Saberwulf: It's this week's exciting episode of What The Fuck Is Ulrika Saying

---

Gooper Blooper: punk pls
SteelKomodo: D:

---

Gooper Blooper: I return bearing a gift
SteelKomodo: ...XD
Gooper Blooper: cornwind emoticon representation: check
Saberwulf: hahahahaha
Cornwind Evil: I am NOT amused
Cornwind Evil: I am EXCEPTIONALLY not amused
Cornwind Evil: NOT.
Cornwind Evil: AMUSED.
Cornwind Evil is not serious.

---

Cornwind Evil: If we do more horror films at Halloween
Cornwind Evil: Sine's sending in this one
Cornwind Evil: Just to see if it rattles the General
Draco: Draco will be submitting "Liar Liar" for horror movies.
Draco: "A legal professional who couldn't lie to save his life? It's downright terrifying!"

---

Gooper Blooper: THE RIDE NEVER ENDS

---

Harpy: I could make some coffee for myself
Harpy: with milk and sugar, just the way I like it
Harpy: i put in way too much sugar for my own good. am i sarah? D:
SK Punk: no, that's totally what I do too
Gooper Blooper: Everyone has a little bit of sarah in them
Gooper Blooper: goodness knows there's enough to go around *rimshot*
TheDeleter: hiyoooooo

---

Gooper Blooper: Gloria's tearing into the crossword puzzle!
RedSpy: SHE'S PUTTING THAT EDUCATED EDUCATION TO GOOD USE

---

Harpy: watch as the completion of the crossword puzzle opens the door to where Firebrand is

---

Gooper Blooper: maniacykt: Guys, guys, WRESTLING ISN'T REAL
desumaytah: WRESTLING ISN'T REAL???
» What have I done with my life?
skaw_: IT'S STILL REAL TO ME, DAMMIT


---

SpaceKomodo: gotta bbl, changing sheets
TheDeleter: i retuuuurn
Harpy: as SK leaves?
Harpy: WHAT DID YOU DO
Gooper Blooper: DEL MESSED WITH SK'S SHEETS
TheDeleter: OH GOD
Harpy: why del
TheDeleter: that's not true at all
TheDeleter: i plead the fifth, sixth and twenty first

---

TheDeleter: jonesybus.txt
TheDeleter: .jpg
TheDeleter: .rar
Gooper Blooper: .bmp
RedSpy: .png
SpaceKomodo: .zip

---

Gooper Blooper: final boss 2013: gaben
Gooper Blooper: he was watching since 2011
Gooper Blooper: I hope this plot was worth the weight
RedSpy: No Goops
RedSpy: He can't fight now
RedSpy: Its the 3rd year
Cornwind Evil: He's defeated by a Dr. Seus book

---

Harpy: today is taco day
Cornwind Evil: Never cared for tacos
Cornwind Evil: Too hard to eat
Harpy: get a soft taco then

---

Harpy: i tend to imagine things as I read
Gooper Blooper: are there people who DON'T do that?
Harpy: boring people :U

---

The Deleter: I think imma sleep too
The Deleter: Tomoo
The Deleter: Oh fuck
The Deleter: I'm turning into a cow
The Deleter changed name to Cow
Cow: Moo
Cow eats grass

---

Saberwulf: Can't wait to see the reactions to David's terminal condition
Harpy joined the chat
Harpy: I'm just here to say
Harpy: NO DAVID NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Harpy: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO​OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Harpy: this has been a moment with harpy crying about characters. now back to your regularly scheduled silence

---

Draco: So apparently the Society is giving out free bags of children. Can I get a few of those so I can man the night shift at my coal mine?
Cornwind Evil joined the chat
Cornwind Evil: That was Slenderman, Draco
. joined the chat
.: He's a guru
Gooper Blooper joined the chat
Gooper Blooper: Slendamann confirmed for guru

---

Draco: Okay, so when is Santa Slenderman bringing child laborers to all the good dragons?
M Sheep: Halloween night
Draco: Yay! =D
M Sheep: Slenderclaus brings gifts for all the bad little girls and boys
M Sheep: The good ones get sacks of organs
M Sheep: aaaaaand I think I've stretched this joke far enough
Draco: Stretched it like a shaven goat hide.

---

MC Komodo: so I found myself wondering what the hell Duodenum meant in Dissidia 012: Final Fantasy
MC Komodo: so I looked it up
MC Komodo: "The duodenum is the first section of the small intestine in most higher vertebrates, including mammals, reptiles, and birds."
MC Komodo: ahahahahahaha
Gooper Blooper: did they just pick a fancy word at random or what
MC Komodo: probably
MC Komodo: because they just named their game after the small intestine
MC Komodo: and everything that implies :P
Harpy: why did they name it after an intestine
TheDeleter: because it contains shit
TheDeleter: hiyooooooooooooooooooooo​oooooooo
TheDeleter: i'm here till thursday
TheDeleter: tell yer mates
Gooper Blooper: voting for Tell Yer Mates has opened
Gooper Blooper: #CallYourFriends

---

SteelKomodo flipped a coin. The coin showed: Tails
SteelKomodo: Aw, I called Sonic :<
Draco: D'OH HO HO HO HO

---

The Deleter: I wonder if they have a room full of puppies for new recruits
The Deleter: Join the society, get a puppy
Harpy: if so, why didn't they give Carlos one? D:
Harpy: needs therapypuppy
The Deleter: He hasn't passed basic training
Harpy: True enough
Harpy: sadface
The Deleter: He needs 50 society points before he can redeem one
Cornwind Evil: They didn't deem him needing one
The Deleter: 5 points gets you a pen
The Deleter: (It's a really nice pen though)
Harpy: ahaha
Harpy: does the pen shoot lasers
The Deleter: No
The Deleter: It's just a nice pen
SteelKomodo: also aw I wanted a laser pen :<
Cornwind Evil: If they deem that having a pet would help his therapy
Cornwind Evil: Then yes they'd give him a puppy, or a kitten, or maybe a rabbit
Harpy: do they have any ferrets?
Harpy: MUST GO OUTSIDE THE NORM
Gooper Blooper: TELL ME ABOUT THE RABBITS, BARROS

---

Gooper Blooper: what the hell dr love
Gooper Blooper: turn in your license
Cornwind Evil: Yeah, this doctor is a quack
Gooper Blooper: Finally an accurate reading
Harpy: haha
Saberwulf: hahaha
Harpy: it was never meant to be
RedSpy: Eeyep

---

Cornwind Evil: Ah, those poor hard working, confused Stormtroopers
Gooper Blooper: they're what really keep this ship running
Cornwind Evil: Gonna be a shame when Carrion Crow massacres 'em to fuel her blood magic THEY WILL ALL LIVE LONG AND HAPPY LIVES HA HA.
Harpy: :I
Gooper Blooper: they're really very sympathetic villains you guys
Gooper Blooper: have some sympy
Cornwind Evil: That was a joke, obviously.
Cornwind Evil: Carrion Crow does not use blood magic
Cornwind Evil: Nor does she kill vicariously
Saberwulf: Blud Magik
Saberwulf: Completely different
Cornwind Evil: Sympy sounds like a terrible generic knockoff maple syrup brand
Cornwind Evil: SYMPY: BETTER THAN WATER
Cornwind Evil: SYMPY: WE ASSURE YOU ALL THE ANTIFREEZE HAS BEEN REMOVED
Cornwind Evil: SYMPY: WIDOW MAKER APPROVED
Cornwind Evil: She might be the Society's top assassin, but she has a unique way of doing her job
Gooper Blooper: I just imagined a fight against Carrion Crow going like that Draco fight and she keeps getting bad rolls, and then I can post in the chatzy "top assassin more like top lel am I right"
Harpy: ha
Gooper Blooper: but she'll probably get like three 31s or something

---

SteelKomodo: what would the Dirksephine tag team move be, goops?
FistOfNeptune198X: Well duh, it'd be Throwsephine!
SteelKomodo: of course XD
Goops McMahon: Josephine lifts
SteelKomodo: But can she lift Dirk?
Goops McMahon: In a sudden turnaround, Dirk fat jokes

---

Goops McMahon: Okay, Missingno fans, I have good news and bad news
Goops McMahon: The bad news is that GameFAQs detected and caught cheating going on in that match
SteelKomodo: what D:
Harpy: ...why did someone cheat on a glitch
Harpy: MISSINGNO GLITCHED ITSELF
FistOfNeptune198X: Its not cheating if Missingno can duplicate the 6th vote 128 times
Goops McMahon: The good news is the cheating was coming from Tidus
Goops McMahon: MISSINGNO LEGIT
Harpy: what
Harpy: AHAHAH
Saberwulf: hahahaha
Goops McMahon: It was angry Tidus fans salty over losing to a glitch
FistOfNeptune198X: GLITCH BOMB? NOT TODAY

---

Harpy: I will assume, for my next post, that Utsuho will be reading the plaque for squids and octopuses
RubyChao: sure thing
Harpy: so that I may introduce Gooper Blooper, not the poster :U
Harpy: oh god almost said not the poser
RubyChao: are you implying our gooper blooper
RubyChao: IS AN IMPOSTER
Gooper Blooper changed name to Goo_er Bloo_er
Goo_er Bloo_er: as long as you don't know my real name...!
SteelKomodo: XD
Harpy: DOOPLISS STOP

---

Gooper Blooper: Someone on gamefaqs says the odds are really stacked against Missingno in the second round
Gooper Blooper: Someone else responded with this
Gooper Blooper: "The only thing I regret about that image is the admission that I can't read 'the odds are stacked against' someone who is still probably going to make people miserable by winning anyway without thinking of that."

---

Harpy: Dirksephine is real
Harpy: you heard it from the man himself
Harpy: its so real
Gooper Blooper: aw yiss here it comes
SteelKomodo: XD
Gooper Blooper asked Chatzy to choose between it's happening and IT'S HAPPENING. Chatzy chose: IT'S HAPPENING
Harpy: KISS THE DAMN GIRL
Gooper Blooper: AWWWW YISS HERE IT MOTHERFUCKING COMES
Harpy: kodak moment
ypsder: JOSEPHINE FROM BEHIND
SteelKomodo: Del can rest easy now, he's been going "JUST KISS ALREADY"
Gooper Blooper: Josephine, controlling the heartstrings
Harpy: your brother should just screenshot goops's next post
Harpy: and say
Harpy: "FINALLY"

---

RubyChao: "imagine a new cooking mama game but instead of mama your guide is gordon ramsey"
SteelKomodo: D:

---

RubyChao: Then, I was shocked when Toad announced "It would be funny if Bowser's parents were dead. Tearing apart a beautiful relationship is always fun..." I started to get disturbed at this and thought about turning my Wii off, but I carried on anyways. The scene changed and you were now playing as Mario. The mission was written at the top of the screen. It was "Kill Bowser's Parents".

---

Jumpropeman: I was walking in the cafeteria one day and my pinky grazed the wall, apparently breaking it
RubyChao: i didn't realize the wall was so fragile

---

RubyChao: so gooper when are we getting the sequel to the award-winning dead sarah
Gooper Blooper: I dunno chao ded josefine may be so spooky that it will be 2spooky2write
RubyChao: what about dead gloria
RubyChao: or would she just walk out
RubyChao: "nope i'll go star in something with actual quality"
Jumpropeman: the wheel-a-meal plate leads Josephine off of a cliff
Gooper Blooper: ded widow maker would be incredibly anticlimactic in many different ways
RubyChao: Dead Widow Maker
RubyChao: WIDOW MAKER DIED
RubyChao: oh there's her baby form
RubyChao: FALSE ALARM GUYS
Gooper Blooper: Worse than that
RubyChao: quick, write Dead Cleft
RubyChao: oh wait
RubyChao: HE IS
Gooper Blooper: She takes the opportunity to mock creepypastas and how formulaic and dumb a lot of horror fic is
RubyChao: ...Actually, not kidding, I'd read that.
Gooper Blooper: "Oh, is this the part where I get hyper-realistic eyes? LOOK OUT FOLKS, I'M TWOSPOOKED"

---

RubyChao: "It looked completely normal, except that on the logo, Frights was replaced with Murders."
ypsder: Pffft what
RubyChao: anyhow you know what i will!
Jumpropeman: I like the first line
Jumpropeman: how it should be moved to the trollpasta wiki
Gooper Blooper: "JUST IN CASE YOU GUYS HATE THIS, IT WAS A JOKE ALL ALONG OKAY"
Gooper Blooper: "HAHA I TROLL U

---

RubyChao: http://24.media.tumblr.com/0f065fe6f62ff7617816cf579b51cb16/tumblr_mrftho0PTV1r0z82oo1_500.png

---

Cornwind Evil: He should ask Reject WHY he wants to find some KOB Patrons
Jumpropeman: like everyone else, he is obviously looking for Sine :V
Cornwind Evil: Sine: NOT AGAIN
Harpy: its like a sine from the gods
Cornwind Evil: Sine: Pardon me, this requires something extra.
Cornwind Evil: *Sine puts on a sheet with two holes cut for eyes*
Cornwind Evil: Sine: BBBBBBBBBBBB​BBOOOOOOOOOOOOOO​OOOOOOO.

---

Jumpropeman: I clicked on the email function on our forums out of curiousity
Jumpropeman: and the captcha code it gave me on the email form is "roll again"
Jumpropeman: I keep refreshing it
Jumpropeman: we have the most awesome captcha system
Jumpropeman: one is a picture of the Fanta logo and the prompt "describe this brand with any word(s)"
Jumpropeman: so you could theoretically put Shittiest Beverage and get by the Captcha
RedSpy: Pfffffft
Jumpropeman: "zombie prom"

---

Jumpropeman: in my younger days I started a piece of fanfiction called Super Mario Super Bowl
Jumpropeman: there is no action. It is all told through dialogue of the announcers
Jumpropeman: I have no idea why I thought that format would work

---

Gooper Blooper: YOU HAD ONE JOB
Harpy: Pit 4 Lyfe
SteelKomodo: PIT NO D:
Cornwind Evil: Well I gave Pit my vote if that means anything
Harpy: Pit plz make a comeback
Gooper Blooper: When the bracket came out, the contest fans were all like "Pit's got this" then when the contest started and old Final Fantasy characters did well people were like "Oh, wait, Cecil's got this"
SteelKomodo: thanks guys :3
Gooper Blooper: NOBODY EXPECTS WREX
RedSpy: . . . I
RedSpy: I'm sorry ;-;
Gooper Blooper: SPY HOW COULD YOU
SteelKomodo: TRAITOR D:<
SteelKomodo shoots Spy.
Gooper Blooper: BAH GAWD REDSPY HAS TURNED HIS BACK ON THE ZFRP UNIVERSE

---

Gooper Blooper: AND THEN THE SOCIETY KIDNAPS ALL THE AQUARIUM ANIMALS TO MAKE LIL' STANLEY'S PATENTED ANIMAL SLURRY
Gooper Blooper: IT SWEEPS THE SEA CLEAN

---

Saberwulf: What the fuck, Iphone
Harpy: what did phone do this time
Saberwulf: My Iphone sent the boat survey notes to my Facebook instead of my dad's email
Harpy: wat
Harpy: wow :/
Gooper Blooper: NOW EVERYONE CAN SEE YOUR BOTE NOTES
Saberwulf: And it took two hours, at that

---

SteelKomodo: #dirksephine
RubyChao: #josephirk
RubyChao: FIGHTING THE SYSTEM

2 comments:

  1. I'm sure someone must have brought it up, but that Dissidia game is called Duodecim, not duodenum. Duodecim is Latin for 12, hence the pretentious name

    ReplyDelete