Chatzy Madness Volume 267: And Then Bootler Was A Sentai

SteelKomodo: lessons learned from this year
SteelKomodo: don't RP anything that needs the text colour fader

---

John Constantine: I got my Virtual Boy in the mail too today but I didn't get to try it because WAKE UP YOU'RE WORKING
John Constantine: my bosses got me a pizza for coming in though :3
CouncilChao: >​JRM HAS THE VIRTUAL BOY
CouncilChao: my god
CouncilChao: it's full of bad gams
CouncilChao: *games
Gooper Blooper: The Virtual Boy's gams are lovely, thank you very much

(later)

Jumpropeman: I got my Virtual Boy so I'm happy
Jumpropeman: except for the pain on my nose since I play it laying down with the thing on my face
Draco: I don't think that's an approved play position.
Jumpropeman: I bought a discount Virtual Boy that works fine but has a broken stand, and I wouldn't know where to put the stand anyway :V
Jumpropeman: I have a very small room
Draco: You put it on A DESK.
Draco: A TABLE.
Draco: AN ALLIGATOR SNAPPING TURTLE.
Draco: All household objects!
Draco: That you can put a Virtual Boy on!
Jumpropeman: there is no room for such things in JRooM- okay maybe the last one
Bree: why does this virtual boy need a stand? I don't know what one looks like
Bree: is it huge?
Jumpropeman: it's a hefty VR headset but it has no strap or anything to keep it on your head
Jumpropeman: their solution was a stand for a table
Jumpropeman: here's a dude with a Virtual Boy
Jumpropeman: it has a controller you need both hands for too so you can't just hold it
Monopolized Sheep: And here I was hoping it came with a Stand
Draco: I had one when I was a youngster.
Jumpropeman: VIRTUAL BOY [ EYE BURNER ]
RubyChao: damn, 2slow
Jumpropeman: VIRTUAL BOY [ RECOMMENDED 15 MINUTE BREAK ]

---

ivel: nobody let Samus find out this is a thing

---

AsteroidDog: do i have to roll
ivel: you have to do a flip instead

---

Monopolized Sheep: I'm going to do a little RP catch up and feel my sins crawling on my back
Monopolized Sheep: "YAYYYYYYY-! Let's play Go! Let's play Go!"
Monopolized Sheep: And then there's this guy

Chatzy Madness Volume 266: There's No Such Thing As Bigfoot

Bree: must resist urge to pandapost
Bree: must..... resist......!

---

RubyChao: "And Kusamochi, and Kusanagi, and Kabi, and Doc, and Timmy, and-"
RubyChao: things i blocked out
RubyChao: there were like 15 kirbies
Gooper Blooper: harpy had a kirby phase and it was impressive
AsteroidDog: regret

---

RubyChao: enjoy this failure of a boss
RubyChao: i give this thing a boosted tractor and it goes to waste, just like the Golden Torizo
RubyChao: i guess Torizos are just doomed to suck

---

Deviant: I love how venplot is ambiguous enough that it has almost no listings whatsoever just in case it turns out not to be a plot. =u

---

Deviant: Whoooop-sie~
Deviant rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 3
Cornwind Evil: WHOOPS
Deviant rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 11
Draco: Good grief, the tractor really freakin' hates you tonight.
Deviant: That's alright. We're not fighting. I can always put it into Shenanigans, as long as you don't mind. =v
Cornwind Evil: I ROLL FOR VEN
Cornwind Evil rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 1
Cornwind Evil: ....NEVER MIND
Deviant: -Rah explodes-
Cornwind Evil: MOVE ALONG
ivel: I roll for Ven?
ivel rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 19
Cornwind Evil: NOTHING TO SEE HERE

Chatzy Madness Volume 265: I Died, The End

Bree: look at all these brine characters getting pairings
Bree: they're just flying off the shelves!!!!
Murky Sheep: All Brine chars must go!
Bree: clash has a crush on aggie, nylora might have a thing for ingrid, etch is paired up with cole, rory is on a date with toinette, lucky has a thing for priscilla, julius and nasennia have had some shippy undertones...
PhoneDel@Home: Julius is a cinnamon and cannot express his feelings for nobody has explored his sad backstory yet
Murky Sheep: But what about Geth?
PhoneDel@Home: So basically he's a brine character
Polar: Geth is going to pair up with Woe and convince her men ain't so bad, in a twist to shock the ages entirely, along his own path out of hatred.
Polar: *This is not and will not be canon and I will find you if you try, CW. b:
PhoneDel@Home: Also Ko cannot be paired because she is on a soul quest to be the henchest woman alive
Brinehammer: Yeah, really though. Somehow, there's someone for everyone!
Brinehammer: ...except Ko =[
LiveAChao: nobody loves emma, rip
Gooper Blooper: Emma X chainsaw
Harpy: more like emma is too busy RIPing things to care
Harpy: who needs a lover when you have a chainsaw
PhoneDel@Home: Ko seems like a character who ain't got time for that shit

(later)

SteelKomodo: aw man, Brine got 2 pairings(?) in the space of one day
Draco: Three. Ko x Bag of Fritos....oh wait, they just broke up.
LiveAChao: brine is very good at this pairing thing
Brinehammer: Ko x Steak sandwich- nevermind, it was a summer fling.
SteelKomodo: indeed he is
PhoneDel@Home: He is
PhoneDel@Home: Right now to set Julius up
SteelKomodo: hahaha
PhoneDel@Home fails

---

Gooper Blooper: I always thought it was funny that Samus' ship was basically a giant version of her helmet. Like, she wouldn't normally go for that kind of Death Egg-type ego booster, and that makes it even funnier

---

Draco: For better or worse, Zook is now officially gone. Gloria can't summon him because she never could summon HIM. Can't summon Draco either 'cause of Komachi.
LiveAChao: a-a-are you saying
LiveAChao: zook
Draco: is ded
LiveAChao: zook is gone forever!? D:
Draco: Yes.
Draco: He lives on only in our hearts.
LiveAChao: me right now
SickHarpy: zook isn't alive

Chatzy Madness Volume 264: Donuts, The Snack Choice Of EVIL

(Regarding Yew's ghost phobia)

Jumpropeman: you know who else was afraid of ghosts
Jumpropeman: Moosh
Gooper Blooper: Yewsh
Jumpropeman: I know more about that bear than most Zelda characters thanks to Rainbow Dash
Jumpropeman: eke out every bit of detail from the Oracle games to make him more interesting :V
Gooper Blooper: Probably my favorite thing about the JRM sisters entering the Brawl each year is seeing what you do with their characters in the preshow and fite itself
Gooper Blooper: A neat little study in what happens when one gives the fitemaster an essentially blank slate
Gooper Blooper: This reached its' extreme with Blind Scorpion Nun, who was an OC with literally nothing but a name, not even an image
Gooper Blooper: And yet JRM made a whole dang character out of that
Jumpropeman: I was given a wheel and a hill, the rolling with it just comes naturally

---

Harp-A-Live: look at that Angie sass
iKomodo: ...I misread that as Angie's ass
iKomodo: Three years of RP'ing dirk has ruined me

---

M Sheep: Oh, save me from myself, the college put the mug of the last guy who student directed on the FRONT PAGE of the site.
CouncilChao: oh dear
Gooper Blooper: M SHEEP'S GONNA BE A STAR
CouncilChao: the eldritch true form of the sheep will surely drive everyone away
Gooper Blooper: YOU'LL SEE HIS FACE ON EVERY MAGAZINE
M Sheep: So, good for him, it was one of the best shows I've ever seen. Hands up. Good little bit of signal boosting for him since he's either graduating or already graduated. He totally deserves all the best, hard worker, good at what he does, ect.
M Sheep: On the other hand
M Sheep: IT'S JUST SITTING THERE, MOCKING ME
M Sheep blood pressure steadily rising
M Sheep: I'm steadily turning into the Hulk
M Sheep: but with less muscle
M Sheep: so, not The Hulk, basically
Harp-A-Live: sheep slowly turning into Attwater

---

iKomodo: ​From your drawing of Big Money Jo, goops, I didn't realize Jo was generally chubby. I thought it was just all on the booty :P
Draco: Dittos what SK said.
Gooper Blooper: A girl with her stats with all the weight in the booty would probably look kinda ridiculous, lel​
Jumpropeman: thicc
Gooper Blooper: XD
HONK HONK BUTT HONK BUTT: Terrifying thought: 295 pounds of booty, 5 pounds of person
HONK HONK BUTT HONK BUTT: Just a skeleton
HONK HONK BUTT HONK BUTT: With major badonkadonk
Harp-A-Live: pretty sure you'd be dead!

Rejected Characters Depot V

It's time once again to dig through the dregs of my Dropbox and go over some of the characters I've considered bringing into RP, but cut for one reason or another. Will any of these guys ever make it to Zetaboards? It's not likely, which is why they're here instead.

Let's cut to the chase and start showing them off!

Days Gone By: All About Format Wars

How the hell.

How the hell, you guys.

When I first dreamed up an idea for a plot about nostalgia, I had no idea what I was in for. I went into this thing with very loose plans, questionable direction, and very little confidence I could deliver. Instead, I wound up with what seems to be the most well-received of my three plots in Season 6. Not only that, but I got a new main character out of it, who then proceeded to be largely responsible for someone else's character becoming a main, as well as helping enable ANOTHER character who did a lot more a lot earlier than planned. I'd expected a hot mess we'd muddle through and people would be all "yeah good plot, now let's... not do that any more" but I plunged ahead anyway and was rewarded with what Format Wars became.

In fact, Format Wars almost didn't happen. Last winter, due to a lack of direction and confidence, I began considering scrapping the plot and expanding a dayplot about Tiffany into a larger plot to fill the space. What kept me from doing so was the fact that I teased Format Wars at the end of Season 5, in my ending post. Fortunately, the idea to expand Tiffany's plot was part of what helped me get my act together and help Format Wars take shape.

Now that the season's over, I've finally got some time and energy to reflect on this plot (and, later, Sarahplot will get a post as well). Let's go over Format Wars from top to bottom.

Chatzy Madness Volume 263: Gatorade (red)

M Sheep looking at Battlebots
M Sheep: Holy Guacamole, The Brain
M Sheep: i can't get over that there's a brain in this battlebot
M Sheep finally watching it now
iKomodo: Hahaha
iKomodo: oh yeah, there was a competitor in Robot Wars called Draven
iKomodo: it jobbed to hell :U
Jumpropeman: it's funny: The reason I'm wary of Robot Wars is how much the arena and the house bots get involved in the match. But in Battlebots, I'm always like "USE THE FLOOR SAWS PLEASE!"
M Sheep: Oh good lawd, they gave it mini bots
M Sheep: as if the brain wasn't enough

---

ivel: I forgot about the Fitelympics
M Sheep: Fiteloompas here, it would seem
SteelKomodo: yep
M Sheep: Of course it happens when my one athletic character is indisposed
M Sheep Junkos to floor
M Sheep: oh well, she got her chance
EggerChao: father squad attends the dexterity contest
EggerChao: strengths: he was in a war, y'know
EggerChao: weakness: THE CHILDREN
M Sheep: The Father Squad
M Sheep: He's just been a bunch of father's standing on each other's shoulders in a big smock THE WHOLE TIME
ivel: lel

---

Draco goes on the fishing trip a week early apparently and misses Mulciferplot, letting Zeldoten's fat be a mystery for another week.
Draco: *fate
HotelInternetRopeman: I must know if Zeldoten lost any weight since being captured D:
KnightChao: we will never learn if zeldoten is actually fat
HotelInternetRopeman: to be fair, this was how she looked last we saw her

---

Jumpropeman: actual boxart for Donkey Kong on the Atari
SteelKomodo: what
Spy: Somebody got confused
Jumpropeman: I gotta wonder what part of the game the "drill cyclops with a mohawk on a moving platform" was inspired by

Chatzy Madness Volume 262: Ungulate Suffers Most

Ardent Argent Agent: Nylorahug achieved
It's
It's beautiful
I'm going to cry
Ardent Argent Agent will be a moment

---

Bronn: "Wait, so you can't use a computer to see the pages... and you can't play anything on a DS. What, are you allergic to modern tech or something?"
"...This is going to sound rude, but between your look, your tape gimmicks, and what you just said... you're not human, are you."
"Can I ask just what you are, then?""
Bronn: DOLBY'S AN ALRUTHINE
Bronn: I KNEW IT
Cornwind Evil: Her name is the Alruthine equivalent of "Sam"
Cornwind Evil: While all the others are named stuff like "Celestine" and "Alistaire."
Mis Sheep: Celestine is the fused form of Celestia and Dustine
Mis Sheep: Also, I return after a lengthier absence than intended
Mis Sheep: What else is new?
Mis Sheep: Fish swims, birds fly, Jrm is actually a supervillain gaslighting us into picking the characters he wants to see in the brawl, and I take a long time to do things

---

MechaChao: sheep
MechaChao: would you want to do more stuff about
MechaChao: TOADBOY
Mis Sheep: LIKE WHAT?!
Mis Sheep: I mean
Mis Sheep: Probably
Bree: mizuki needs to talk to some forum nerds
Bree: also quoting something I said on skype: "and then Mizuki blows all their minds when she posts a selfie of her and Stan Ligature in front of the KOB"
MechaChao: ^
Mis Sheep: THEY AREN'T BECOMING CHARACTERS
Mis Sheep: but sure
Bree: are the drunk guys who vote on fites also on this forum
Mis Sheep: I'm not sure they can see straight enough to type
Bree: they tried to write a novel once, together
Bree: their strategy was to simultaneously pour three beers on the keyboard
Bree: it was the greatest novel ever written
Mis Sheep: Ahahhaha
Bree: the computer however did not survive
Bree: also they had to buy more beer
Bree: three beers is half a pack! but they really wanted to give it their all
Mis Sheep: Liter-ary geniuses of their time

(later)

Mis Sheep flops in
Mis Sheep: kill me now
Shiva Dweeb: no
Mis Sheep: Put up a post at least
Gooper Blooper: being m sheep is suffering
Mis Sheep: Ungulate suffers most
Gooper Blooper: if I had a billion dollars I'd give a big enough chunk of it to M Sheep so he could live jobless in a nice little spoopy cabin that got good internet and he'd have a friendly robot butler who would type for him
Mis Sheep: Ahahhahah
MechaChao: oh man, the other part i didn't even realize
MechaChao: the deleted posts
MechaChao: that touch, man
Gooper Blooper: Sheep put so much thought into this fake forum
Gooper Blooper: If he had more personal time I dare say he'd just go set up his own Zetaboards and fill it with topics, posting with twenty different accounts as he logs in and out, and then send Chao a link to it and chao has to make a WateryCollector account and post there for real
Gooper Blooper: they have a roleplaying subforum
Gooper Blooper: we have to go deeper
MechaChao: i would do it
MechaChao: i really would

Chatzy Madness Volume 261: Welcome To FridgeLand

Cornwind Evil: You might wanna ask, outside of the Federation Force, why Mulcifer's been so quiet
Cornwind Evil: The answer is......prep
GunslingerChao: so what you're saying is
GunslingerChao: Mulcifer has been building up his army of preps, and we must all become goths (or "goffs") to save Vegas
Bree: viola has a headstart on that one
M Sheep: Have I come back to gothplot?

---

Asmоdeus entered for the first time
Asmоdeus: Wow, I haven't showed up in ages. Sorry about that.
Cornwind Evil: The pudding with a gun got into our Brawl!
Asmоdeus: Holy shit, really?
Asmоdeus: That's so amazing.
Asmоdeus: I hope it wins.
Cornwind Evil: It was just a guest appearance
Cornwind Evil: And the Brawl has happened
Cornwind Evil: And it did not win, sorry
Cornwind Evil: You could say the win was...stolen from it
Asmоdeus: RIP.
Asmоdeus: Oh well, I'm sure it tried its best.

---

Jumpropeman: I'm trying to not have every Midori sentence end in an exclamation mark

---

Shiva Dweeb: the mayor must declare a state of emergency
Shiva Dweeb: our precious cinnamon roll stacy
Shiva Dweeb: IS MISSING
Shiva Dweeb: (nah that's silly)

---

Bree: totally trying to make celestia in sims 4
Bree: butt levels are at maximum, not sure if it's enough butt but it's all I can do :<
Bree: this game doesn't have enough purple clothing
Bree: (I can't make celestia's hair purple so I made it blue and gave her a purple hat)
Draco: Aw
Bree: >​celestia in a sleeveless/shoulderless thigh-length dress
Bree: yyyyyyeah no
Draco: Nooooooooooooooooo yes
Bree: >​exact right shade of purple... and three-inch heels
Bree: why

---

Jumpropeman: never put two Brodericks in a room
Jumpropeman: you'll beg for the simple small disturbance of the droning over their constant back and forth
Jumpropeman: 500 words where single sentence would do
Jumpropeman: a thousand pardons before either gets started talking about the subject at hand
Jumpropeman: ​and then they both put on the Courier hat and shoot each other dead without another word

Chatzy Madness Volume 260: Regards, Gul'dan

M Sheep: OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO
M Sheep: I AM THE GHOST OF M SHEEP
M Sheep: COME BACK TO POST THE POST I COULD NOT FINISH IN LIFE!
ivel uses the Poltergust 3000
M Sheep: OoOo-aw, maAaAaAaA-*pop*

---

PremiumChao: god i forgot how ridiculous some of my old rp was
PremiumChao: gallade became a senator
PremiumChao: and he lived in "Unnamed City"
Jumpropeman: Unnamed City
PremiumChao: which was the actual name of the city
Jumpropeman: capital of A State
PremiumChao: Gallade: I'll take three people up to the station with me, and we will-
*Phone rings*
Gallade: Hello? A meeting of Congress? Now? Ack! *Hangs up* Congress is meeting, so I have to leave. General Goomba, you take charge!
*Gallade flies through a wall, and heads off*
PremiumChao: Gallade: "Position Open for Congress Member. The spot of representive of Unnamed City is open...* Hey! I could run for Congress!
Jumpropeman: congress and its wacky impromptu meetings
Viva Vermont: *gallade is thrown into the sea*
PremiumChao: also their billboard was "Welcome to Unnamed City. Now scram!"
Viva Vermont: unnamed city was actually the inside of oscar the grouch's trash can
Jumpropeman: sounds like a joke from a cartoon
Draco: Sounds like a city in Vermont.
Draco: WAKKA WAKKA
PremiumChao: Axem Blue's Hobbies: Slicing stuff, being somewhat evil, being an AoE member.
PremiumChao: i was good at character descriptions

(later)

PremiumChao: Gallade: *Looks at the three members of the AoE getting up, then at Eggman-X* Eggman-X, what are you DOING?
Eggman-X: I'm playing golf.
Gallade: Why?
Eggman-X: Because I'm using exploding golf balls.
*Eggman-X takes a swing, but he hits the golf ball too hard, causing it to explode in his face*
Eggman-X: Ow.
f-: Heeheeeenheee.
Jumpropeman: Eggman-X then kicked an exploding blitzball
PremiumChao: *The Pink Chao lands next to Alphashi*
Alphashi: Who are you?
TPC: I am The Pink Chao.
Steelshi: Ahahahahahahah! You're PINK!
TPC: *Fires an Ice Arrow, freezing Steelshi* Why I'm here is to explain the Red Star.
Crystalshi: Red... Star?
TPC: Have you noticed the red comet recently?
Alphashi: Yes.
TPC: That is the Red Star. It is a comet which appears at irregular intervals over this planet. It is only reachable by the Green Launch Star.
Crystalshi: What's on it?
TPC: That's not in the books. Bye! *Flies off*
PremiumChao: i was VERY GOOD at exposition in the old days
PremiumChao: General Goomba: But how will we get it from them?
Jester Chao: Leave it to me!
*Jester Chao puts on a fake moustache. He then walks up to the door and knocks on it. Steelshi opens the door*
Jester Chao: Hello. I'm from the government. We've detected energy spikes coming from this house. We believe you may have a powerful item causing these spikes.
Steelshi: Is it this? *Pulls out Green Power Star*
Jester Chao: Yes. In the interest of national security, I must consficate that.
Viva Vermont: imagine a book called "The Book Of The Red Star"
Viva Vermont: page 1: "The Red Star is a comet which appears at irregular intervals over this planet. It is only reachable by the Green Launch Star."
Viva Vermont: page 2: "we don't know anything else"

Chatzy Madness Volume 259: Draw Me Like One Of Your Noseless Girls

Etrohus: waiting for ivelpost
Etrohus: then i shall retreat to the safety of my bed
BrawlChao: >​ivelpost
BrawlChao: *harpy stays up for an eternity*
ivel: :I
Etrohus: i would if i didn't have work at 9
ivel: I guess I'll just cancel this post I was writing about Gino then (I actually am writing one, it's actually about to be posted)
NGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHSpy: >​Ivelpost
NGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHSpy: IT HAPPEN
Draco: Ivelpost? NANIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII​IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII​IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII​IIIIIIIIIIIIIIII?
Etrohus: nanimachines, son

---

NGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHSpy: Riddle me this:
NGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHSpy: Why am I already trying to beat True Arena with no abilities
ivel: because you have a problem
NGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHSpy: I do
NGAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHSpy: I have a serious problem

---

Etrohus: i have a stupid post in mind
Etrohus: please hold
ivel holds Harpy
ivel: that's what you meant right? :U
Draco: omai <3

Chatzy Madness Volume 258: Big Bar Brawl 6 Edition

MeleeChao: ​>​music meister interested in praline
MeleeChao: ​i've got a bad feel about this scoob

---

M Sheep: ​Still getting over Attenborough​
Jumpropeman: ​Attenborough seemed a very Zoofights-y thing to do so I just rolled with the idea when it came to me :P
SteelKomodo: ​...is it crazy to say I wanna see him outside this?
SteelKomodo: ​like, maybe narrating stuff that happens in SRS RP?
The betting corner returns!?: ​Oh my god yes
M Sheep: ​Soar the Eagle snags a new hire to the team!​
Jumpropeman: ​"Here we see Dewnine engaging in a playful romp with Aggie. Notice how its slobber swings from its mouth every so briefly before freezing into icicles" *nature documentary music for 2 minutes as the camera watches Dewnine drool up close*​
SteelKomodo: ​hahahaha

---

Gooper Blooper: ​>​Ceneric's Cuties
Gooper Blooper: ​THE GREATEST ALLIANCE SINCE ARIEL AND MOOSH
M Sheep: ​Somebody get on drawing Ceneric's Cuties in Charlie's Angels poses​

---

SteelKomodo: ​"Josephine and Mika get in an impromptu wrestling match there on the ground"
SteelKomodo: ​Dirk's nose explodes with blood loud enough to startle Pit. "HOLY CRAP DIRK YOU OKAY"
Jumpropeman: first KO of the Brawl is Dirk
Jumpropeman: and it hasn't even started yet
Gooper Blooper: "Calm down, Dirky, at least wait until I cross off that bingo square!"

---

MeleeChao: there's 13 feeds
MeleeChao: and in a plot twist
MeleeChao: it turns out Alan Anderson is helping to bankroll the brawl this year
MeleeChao: THE COUNCIL WAS BEHIND IT ALL ALONG
MeleeChao: ...okay that joke was a stretch, sorry
Jumpropeman: The Council storms the Brawl with a plesiosaur, a kaiju with scissors for a nose, and some Modern Dinosaurs like crocs and komodo dragons

Chatzy Madness Volume 257: Kill All White Mages

M Sheep: "So, let's go over what we know."
M Sheep: Gloria then pauses for several seconds and says "And that's all we know."
M Sheep: Patchy: "But you didn't-"
M Sheep: Gloria: "Yes."
Gooper Blooper: no, sheep, that was last year
Gooper Blooper: this year you actually progressed things!
M Sheep: What?!
M Sheep: IMPOSSIBURU
Kitty Bree: someday it has to end, sheep
Kitty Bree: someday
M Sheep: Some interesting theories from the Mage Minds to be sure
Gooper Blooper: *and then it turns out Gloria was wrong about everything and Purnima is the one who made the bomb*
M Sheep: Ohohohohoho~
M Sheep: Turns out, Purnima was Mrs. Kovalchuck
M Sheep: and the bomb is actually Junko
Draco: Junko is da bomb. <3
M Sheep: And to think Blik was the mastermind behind the whole thing
Draco: Alice was trying to save us.
Gooper Blooper: Blik even told us he was going to build a bomb back in season 2
Gooper Blooper: Unfortunately, none of us could understand him
Gooper Blooper: so we just played the king's quest town theme on loop and laughed at the unintelligible robot man
M Sheep: Alice wasn't the hero we wanted
M Sheep: but the hero we deserved
Draco: To be fair, Goops, Gloria gets obvious things wrong sometimes.
Gooper Blooper: Like having no idea that "Gloriamame" is just a scheme to allow Yamame to fill her with cookies and then eat her?
Draco: More or less. :V
Kitty Bree: don't eat the sugar mage, yamame, it'll go right to your hips
Kitty Bree: and you'll get the diabeetus
Draco: D::::
Kitty Bree: does yamame actually have eight eyes
Draco: Sometimes. Usually she only has two.
M Sheep: It's 2016
M Sheep: She can have as many eyes as she wants
M Sheep: I hope she works her way up to sixteen before the season is out
M Sheep: No slacking now!
Draco: ​You haven't seen Yamame go full spider yet.
Kitty Bree: ​will there be a terrifying image when yamame does go full spider?​
M Sheep: ​You never go full spider.​

---

Pellar: ​Gregor dies of injuries sustained while accepting Brawl Championship, meaning only the horse wins
FinancialChao: >​implying any assistants will make it
FinancialChao: they had their year >:(
Gooper Blooper: Actually, that makes me want to ask - Does the horse have a name? If so, JRM would want to know
Gooper Blooper: I'm guessing it doesn't
M Sheep: It's name is Gregor's Meal Ticket
FinancialChao: Gorgre
Pellar: In game, no. Scarcely any of the horses, really. For most characters it's just a class change. There's one in FE that does- Sophie's- but any for Gregor is flavortext. That said, liking to consume text as I do, we shall call it Ogre Gr.
Kitty Bree: its name is Emergency Rations
Gooper Blooper: mrgrgr
Pellar: It's name is That Remembrance Of Days Long Past That Neither Time Nor Drink May Blur.
Alternatively, you could plagiarize Geralt of Rivia and name the horse Roach, but I imagine the white wolf might take issue with that.
FinancialChao: its name is Bad Horse
FinancialChao: and it turns out it's the godbeast of the brawl
Pellar: Bad Horse, (Bad hoooorse!) Bad horse, he's bad!
He rides across the nation, The thoroughbred of sin *sings away badly*
FinancialChao: so, as someone who's never watched it, just read about it, answer me this
FinancialChao: is bad horse just literally a horse
FinancialChao: that is bad
Pellar: You never see him perform any actions, but at the ending, he is a literal horse standing at the table with the other human supervillains. =u Most of his characterization is from Horrible or from Bad Horse's own minions.
Pellar: It is ​implied​ that Bad Horse is entirely capable of speech, plotting, and motive, as well as possibly a great deal more, but whatchersee is a horse. Y8
FinancialChao: excellent
FinancialChao: i am glad that he is nothing else

---

Draco: For some reason, it just feels right having Zeldoten use British insults.

Chatzy Madness Volume 256: Deadtris

PandemonicChao: >​RD voted
PandemonicChao: >​there's very little huge text or color
PandemonicChao: i
PandemonicChao: what world am i in

---

Jumpropeman: im gonna try and find myself in those four hours Mighty No. 8 credits
PandemonicChao: goodbye, jrm
Jumpropeman: ...
Jumpropeman: they didn't credit me right
Jumpropeman: It just says "- a Generous Backer"
Harpy: a generous becker
Jumpropeman: my Kickstarter info is public and I said my name on the surveys they sent out
Jumpropeman: well, hopefully my name will be in other games
Jumpropeman: being the Special Thanks in Axe Cop can't be my only legacy
Jumpropeman: who needs children when you can have your name amidst a crowd of other forgettable names *o*
Onoving: Well, JRM, at least it wasn't what they gave Josephine. I don't think you want your post life credit to be 'a generous backside'.
PandemonicChao: i dunno, with her character at this point, she might actually be proud of that

---

Del: lol i ordered too many multibases for kings of war
Del: i ordered what i thought was 1 regiment and 2 troop bases
SteelKomodo: del pls
Del: what i have is 5 regiments and 14 troops
Del: i'm dying
Del: at least i don't have to order more for the rest of my kingdoms of men
Del: derp
SteelKomodo: rip u

---

Jumpropeman: is gino from mabinogi
Jumpropeman: or is he from something else
ivel: yes
Harpy: he is indeed from mabinogi!
Harpy: milletians and all of his moves come from mabinogi
Jumpropeman: coolio, that'll help me a bit
ivel: and his name was from... a name generator :U
ivel: but yes
Harpy: those moves he listed are from there and are some of the strongest skills there are in the melee stuff
Jumpropeman: *has Ginocini use the Kamehameha*
ivel: lel

---

(Springtrap insults every Brawl entrant besides himself that CW doesn't vote for)

Rainbow Red Ambrose: I debated on whether to have Springtrap end EVERY reason with "also you fucking suck." I decided in the end it was a Sideshow Bob steps on rakes joke.
Gooper Blooper: And then everyone jumps springtrap at the start for mocking them and he gets last
Rainbow Red Ambrose: "you people have no sense of humor."

Chatzy Madness Volume 255: BLOOD PIANTA

FuryWulf: Oh hey it's Autistic Pride Day and also LGBT Pride month, that's good shit
FuryWulf: Hi I'm Audrey I'm autistic as shit and gay as fuck #squad
Bree: LGBT pride month?!?!?!
Bree: we need to unleash all the gay on the forum
Bree: SUMMON THE JEWEL MAN
FuryWulf: Yeah June was made LGBT Pride month for the US last year
Jumpropeman: it is also
Jumpropeman: Alzheimers Awareness Month
FuryWulf: I am now aware of alzheimers, thank you JRM
Jumpropeman: you're welcome

---

Dellaris: Okay brief lesson in how to julius
Jumpropeman: 1) kill EVERYTHING
Jumpropeman: 2) never say sorry

---

Jumpropeman: WILL WE EVER LEARN SONIC MAN'S TRUE IDENTITY? WILL THE LIGHTNING BOLT SOCIETY EVER KILL HIM? WHAT WAS THE DEAL WITH THAT INGRID POST? YOTAM, HE'S PRETTY SAD! Find out all these answers and more in like, July or something

---

Draco: Bree left the chat 117 seconds ago
Gooper Blooper left the chat 2 minutes ago
Draco: Thank you for making that distinction, Chatzy. BV

---

(Custardkittensrock enters Broque Monsieur and Broggy into the Brawl)

desperate roleplayer: >​broggy
desperate roleplayer: we're fucking dead

---

Jumpropeman: I have seen the face of suffering, and it's name...
Jumpropeman: is Wild Woody
Jumpropeman: 2:00 minutes in
Draco: If you reveal your Secret Fiter, JRM is replacing it with Wild Woody.

---

Draco: Parsee and Yamame baked Father's Day muffins for Gloria. They later asked how Helios liked them and Gloria went "....yes." Then cast invisible and fled. ;V

Exposing the Esoteric

The first of my three major 2016 plots is in the books, and now that Brawl Season and the fabled trip to Ohio are over and I've gotten a chance to rest, I can share some info about the plot. I'll break it down event by event, then show off what got cut.

This plot pretty much had to happen. I determined in 2015 after Sumireko graduated from Fite Club cameo to minor character and then to regular character that she needed a plot, but my initial idea was a pretty weak one-day affair, the specifics of which I don't even really remember any more.  However, Chao wound up reminding me about the Occult Balls, the magical and bizarre macguffins everyone is after in Sumireko's source game, and it was off to the races as I set a number of balls - seven, a classic number for macguffins if you ask me - and assigned each one a different attribute.

Let's go to the event rundown...

Chatzy Madness Volume 254: Pikapurp

ThermalChao: AAAAAAA
ThermalChao: hi

---

Normal Guy Carlos: i take other people's shit and then add onto them like i'm adding 20 crab claws to this sarah drawing
Normal Guy Carlos: (i'm not)
Gooper Blooper: perfectly normal sarahcrab

---

(Concerning Dimension's Hasp, a world in RP of cut/unused/retconned/rumored content in video games)

ThermalChao: i wonder
ThermalChao: could i get away with creepypasta stuff here
ThermalChao: because it's
ThermalChao: ​JUST A GLITCH
Jumpropeman: ​return of K. Rool Country? :V​
ThermalChao: sadly no
ThermalChao: k. rool country did not use the phrase just a glitch
Jumpropeman: ​DEAD UTSUHO​
Jumpropeman: just post entirely in spanish
Gooper Blooper: I believe that creepypasta stuff would only qualify if it genuinely ​was​ "just a glitch"
Gooper Blooper: which it never was, it was evil
ThermalChao: blast, foiled again
ThermalChao: there goes my chance to set up my next Spooky Scary entrant
Gooper Blooper: it's a little early for that :V
ThermalChao: because if spoopyfite happens i'll probably just enter more creepypasta, sorry :V

---

Normal Guy Carlos: this is the dumbest thing i've done yet
Normal Guy Carlos: i have no idea i just know "pikablu" and just made a thing
Jumpropeman: there was this thing
Jumpropeman: which started the pikablu rumors
Jumpropeman: even though its pinkish-purple
Normal Guy Carlos: pikapurp
Normal Guy Carlos: doesn't have the same ring
Normal Guy Carlos: that's obviously marill to me
Normal Guy Carlos: :U
Jumpropeman: Purpachu
Jumpropeman: Pinkachu
Jumpropeman: link
Normal Guy Carlos: canon
Jumpropeman: look at this damn thing
Normal Guy Carlos: plz
Jumpropeman: looks like the bootleg version of an actual pokemon
Normal Guy Carlos: bootlegs
Gooper Blooper: As someone who was around for Pikablu
Gooper Blooper: As far as I recall, it was simply a nickname for Marill before GSC got localized
Gooper Blooper: So Pikablu and Marill are identical
Normal Guy Carlos: ...
Jumpropeman: Pikablu is in Bill's Garden with Togepi
Jumpropeman: duh
Gooper Blooper: You could easily swap in that pink thing though
Jumpropeman: and the other PokeGods
Normal Guy Carlos: why must you ruin me, goops
Normal Guy Carlos: nah i kid
Gooper Blooper: lel sorry :V
Jumpropeman: and it says PIKAPURP
Jumpropeman: in the raspiest manly voice
Normal Guy Carlos: THE DREAM IS DEAD
Jumpropeman: http://vocaroo.com/i/s1FXmwyyWqxp
Normal Guy Carlos: i'm dead
Normal Guy Carlos: someone's gonna need to continue this plot and it's not me
Normal Guy Carlos: i'll be here
Normal Guy Carlos: dead
Jumpropeman: Pikapurp takes a sip from its beer while sitting in a lawnchair on the porch
Jumpropeman: "Gonna fix the car later, mhm"

Chatzy Madness Volume 253: The Ur-Admin

(Del debuts a new character named Toinette and she and Marie begin making dirty talk almost immediately)

TechnoChao: so if they shack up
TechnoChao: do we call the pairing
TechnoChao: ​Marie And-Toinette
SteelKomodo: ​CHAO
SteelKomodo: ​PLS
Draco: lel
Draco 's monocle pops out. ಠ_ಠ
Bree: next on marie flirts with everyone: marie flirts with meiling and scarlett, a threesome ensues
SteelKomodo: BREE PLS
Bree: and/or she flirts with rahat and h'astra
Bree: both of those work
Bree: ​all five of them, idk​
BUTT BUTT and SHIELD BUTT: *looks at watch. All hands on watch are pointing to Lewd*
BUTT BUTT and SHIELD BUTT: Oh goodness. Just look at the time
Bree: lewd o'clock
Draco cancels ZFRP, slathers "PG-13" signs everywhere. EVERYWHERE! 8V

---

Bree: aardvarks

---

Dellaris: Oh hey when did that new chatzy madness come up
TechnoChao: yesterday
Dellaris: It's a good one
TechnoChao: you're SO BEHIND
Draco: For being eight hours ahead of us, you sure are behind the times! ;D
Altair: Draco you fucker
Draco: ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Draco begins blaring the airhorns.
Draco BLARHORNS.

---

Draco: Harpy, I think Ruby is planning the next phase of his evil plan to trick me into making more characters relevant to Gloria.
Gooper Blooper: You figured it out, Draco, Chao's been pulling the strings this whole time
Gooper Blooper: His ultimate goal is to replace Ariel with Gloria as your favorite sugar mage
Draco: Noooooooooooo

---

TechnoChao: i forgot for a second that honey the twilek was just dead
TechnoChao: one of the very few characters who didn't return from a fite
TechnoChao: NERIQUE PERMAKILLED SOMEONE
Draco: Yeah. He's a badass.

Chatzy Madness Volume 252: A Walking Talking Trash Can

PhoneModo joined the chat
PhoneModo: AHM DRUNK
Draco: Hi Drunk. I'm Draco. :V
Dellaris: Wow draco thats a dad joke
Dellaris: Are you secretly a dad
Dellaris: Dadman
Spy: With the mic in his hand he's a dadman

---

Gooper Blooper: Leave it to harpy to take "lel ponderosa steakhouse fucked up my order" and give it a sad backstory :V
Baking Intensifes: damn skippy i'm doing it
Baking Intensifes: i'm going to make this entire thing somehow sad
Baking Intensifes: maybe

---

GoldenChao looks at old stuff
GoldenChao: "why's this image va-"
GoldenChao: >​imageshack
GoldenChao twitches

---

GoldenChao: "Some of the hidden items in the Japanese releases of Red and Green just have flat-out incorrect coordinates for the itemfinder’s reference, and if you pick up one out of this set of six miscoded items, the other five become unobtainable."
GoldenChao: "The aforementioned hidden items can, however, somehow be made obtainable again by moving a fossil item out of your inventory."
GoldenChao: "Catching an ‘M with a Hexadecimal identifier of 00 will leave behind an invisible but otherwise Completely Normal Ditto with its previous moveset at level 0 or 80 that needs to be caught or defeated before the battle can properly end. These games have been out for twenty years and we still don’t know why this happens."
SteelKomodo: welp

Chatzy Madness Volume 251: Teach Me How To Be Taller

iKomodo: CONFOUND THOSE PITSUHOS
iKomodo: THEY DRIVE ME TO #BUTTS

---

Thunder Thighs: >​big d was in the bar last night
Darkwing Duckvel: oh my
Thunder Thighs: no not like that ivel

---

Thunder Thighs: nitori tries to sell great ovens
Thunder Thighs: Frankie stares at the price, looks at nitori, and says a single word.
Thunder Thighs: "No."
Thunder Thighs: "but-" "Don't start this conversation, kid, because it ain't gonna end well for ya. Let's just say I hardly get enough profit to keep this place goin' and keep my employees motivated."

---

Draco: Welcome back to the inbox folder on the other side of the individual named recipient only for the first time in total there.
Draco: The following link to the next week or so and then you can get a chance to get the same time as I can be done in a couple weeks ago I had to do with it and it was the only one that I have to do with it and it was the only one that I can do to get a new thread.
Draco stops mashing the suggested text button.
M Sheep: Draco's been taken over by spambots!
iKomodo: Hahaha
Draco: MSheep to be able to make a difference in the future and hopefully it won't work for you to be in the future of the individual named addressee or authorized to use a different story of my resume to you and the rest of my resume for you and your face to face with the following document Microsoft Windows was either way it was a pleasure to meet you at the moment and will be able to make a decision about whether or not I would love you so much for your email address and phone number for me to get a chance I can get the chance of getting it back to me.
Draco: The following link unsubscribe here with a few months ago I had a chance I could get a good time to do the needful at your convenience and I have been a long time and effort to make the payment to the right side of the day I have a nice to hear from you and the best of try and get back with you to see the status is a very long as I can be done in time and effort and I have been trying since you were to do the job description I have to do it for yourself a favor and send it to the inbox folder and then I will be in the morning and I will be in the next week and will not be a great weekend as well but it is the best regards David David and his family were the only way to get back with you and I will be a good time for me to be able to get a good day to get the best way to get the same time to get back to you and I will be a bit.
Draco begins foaming at the mouth.
Bree shoots Draco with a tranquilizer dart
M Sheep: Hoo boy
Bree: it's okay everyone, we have the situation under control
M Sheep: We're gonna need a young priest and an old priest for this one

(later)

Jumpropeman: Draco's autocomplete thing was awesome
Jumpropeman: specifically saying here's my resume for you and your face
Jumpropeman: like damn son
Gooper Blooper: do the needful at your convenience

Chatzy Madness Volume 250: I Want To Kill Old Jumpropeman

(A deathtrap set by a Cornwind villain is destroyed before it can kill anyone)

Cornwind Evil: I dangled the chance for JRM and Sheep to massacre characters and then cruelly snatched it away
Jumpropeman: sadly, Melvin Underbelly would have just gummed up those threshers :(
Maid Sheep: Truly
Maid Sheep: I was going to break the nice Junkos and Eleven Thirtys
Maid Sheep: ...break out
Maid Sheep: clearly, I meant break out

---

iKomodo: I used to really like Harry Potter
iKomodo: but then the movies came along and you could tell the people making them just wanted to make money off of it
iKomodo: so I lost interest. I saw the corporate machine behind the silver screen and got away whilst I could
Jumpropeman: and JK Rowling's been none too kind to her series after the books ended with the same motivations
Jumpropeman: that Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them movie could be interesting though
Jumpropeman: since it seems to be an original story at least
iKomodo: I was hype for it, then I found they were stretching it into another fucking trilogy when a standalone film would have done
Jumpropeman: ...no way
iKomodo: and my erection wilted like a Venus flytrap in the presence of a hungry brontosaurus

---

CloudyChao: fun fact of the day
CloudyChao: danbooru is so old, it predates touhou 9
CloudyChao: which came out in 2005
Gooper Blooper: There are a fair few super-old sites now, if by "super-old" you go by, say, 10 years or older
CloudyChao: yeah, it's kind of interesting
CloudyChao: you don't really realize how long the net's been around until you start looking at the age of a lot of popular sites
Gooper Blooper: Youtube is over 10
Gooper Blooper: Chatzy was created in 2001
CloudyChao: >​chatzy is THAT OLD
CloudyChao: holy shit
Bree: chatzy is 15! it's a teenager!
Bree: it can almost drive!
iKomodo: Yaaaaay
Gooper Blooper: well now that I look at it
Gooper Blooper: the site DOES look pretty simplistic/old-fashioned​, does it not
Tiz: kek

Chatzy Madness Volume 249: Outraged Goldfish

Cornwind Evil: I've figured out a Twisted Metal solution
Cornwind Evil: And at the end of Round 3 there will be a SURPRISE in terms of RL stuff
Samoa Dinosaurs: Raspberry is forcibly ejected from the tournament?
Jumpropeman: the surprise is that Cornwind will do the finale entirely on film through charades
DiamondChao: the SURPRISE is that we will get together and do it in real life
Shaman Obssessed Harpy: oh god its a LARP
Jumpropeman: imagine a bunch of people running around pretending to drive cars and blowing raspberries for engine noises
Samoa Dinosaurs: Twisted Metal spoilers:
Samoa Dinosaurs: ​Joshy steals the six human souls and becomes omega joshy
Samoa Dinosaurs: ​Nothing changes
Samoa Dinosaurs: ​He just keeps driving his kratt and competing

---

Jumpropeman: some people say they want to skydive before they die as sort of the "crazy stunt" they do so they don't feel unfulfilled
Jumpropeman: but I want to be
Jumpropeman: a human cannonball
Jumpropeman: and if I can do that
Jumpropeman: I'll die happy
Cornwind Evil: Thing is, anyone can skydive
Cornwind Evil: You need training to be a human cannonball methinks
ivel: that is true
Jumpropeman: i'd be willing
Jumpropeman: I'll put a pot on my head like Guybrush and I should be fine though, right?

---

Cornwind Evil: Hey GB, check it out
Cornwind Evil: It's the forgotten cousin of the Metal Slug series
Cornwind Evil: And what an AMAZING ending!
Gooper Blooper: An old arcade game? You bet your ass it'll have a fantastic ending
Gooper Blooper: they always made sure to make it worth your effort and quarters, and by that I mean CONFLATURATIONS YOU WINNER
Cornwind Evil rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 14
Cornwind Evil: Parsee gives an adequate conflaturation.
Cornwind Evil: ...see, Draco? Now you've got ME doing it
ivel: that ending
ivel: really
Gooper Blooper: Draco has taken control of CW's chatzy handle
Draco: :I
Draco: I did no such thing. *hides the remote control*
Cornwind Evil: Cornwindplot 2016 is cancelled
Bree: hooray!
Draco: More time for Skype.
Bree: I mean uh
Bree: oh no :<
Cornwind Evil: Unfortunately, since I had no wholly set plot, that command inverts on itself
Cornwind Evil: Meaning THE RETURN OF THE SEASONLONG CORNWIND PLOT
Draco: Oh no! Cornwindplot consume all other plots!
Shaman Obssessed Harpy: two season long harplot
Shaman Obssessed Harpy: ye
Shaman Obssessed Harpy rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 1
Shaman Obssessed Harpy: no
Shaman Obssessed Harpy: the dream never hadplen
DiamondChao: wait
DiamondChao: so does that ending
DiamondChao: do they literally just ​restart the game
Gooper Blooper: Oh my, that IS bad
Gooper Blooper: especially for 1994
Gooper Blooper: Pathetic, really

Chatzy Madness Volume 248: We've Shipped Godzilla

Bree: M Sheep: "You were RAD AS CANADA back there!"
-M Sheep: Meiling's a big fan of northern landmasses, apparently
-Gooper Blooper: *hides letty*
Bree: when the hell did meiling say that
Bree: why the hell did meiling say that
StarlightChao: thanking papyrus after meshugah
Bree: that doesn't answer my second question
StarlightChao: i don't know
StarlightChao: you were the one who wrote it
Bree: this is what meiling does
Bree: I write her and then months and months later I'm like "what the fuck, meiling"
Bree: if that doesn't happen then I haven't written her properly I guess

---

Bree: I read an article about The Rock's diet
Bree: he eats like a pound and a half of fish ​per day​
Harpy: sounds like the wicasa diet
Spy: IF YA SUHMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL​
Spy: WHAT THE ROCK
Spy: IS EATING
Bree: he eats other stuff too
Bree: his daily routine involved ​seven​ meals totaling 4,800 calories
StarlightChao: that diet
StarlightChao: it just sounds
StarlightChao: a little
StarlightChao: ...
Harpy: NO
StarlightChao: ...
Harpy: CHAO
StarlightChao: ​fishy
Bree: :IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII​IIIIIIIIIII
Gooper Blooper: JesterChao.txt
Harpy: i'm not inviting you to my christmas party
Spy: DANG
Spy: Its okay Chao
Spy: You can come to mine
Draco: Yeah, you can come to Spy's.
Draco: I'm not having one because I'll be too busy inventing things to feel terrible over.
StarlightChao: like the time you KILLED MY BROTHER
StarlightChao: the one who didn't exist
ivel: Chao
ivel: no
Draco: Why would I feel terrible about that? VB

---

StarlightChao: >​reading through old rp
StarlightChao: >​parsee extolling gluttony's virtues to edea all the way back at the end of may
StarlightChao: forty keks

Chatzy Madness Volume 247: Thành Viên Dóng Góp

M Sheep: "Sarah is short. We all know this".
M Sheep: Thank you for the reminder, narration

---

Jumpropeman: *tries to disable automatic updates on Raven's Cry*
Jumpropeman: the only options are "Always keep this game up to date", "only update when I launch this game" and "High priority- always auto-update this game before others"
Jumpropeman: they REALLY don't want you to have to suffer unpatched Raven's Cry
EclipseChao: but
EclipseChao: but be brave guy ;_;

---

EclipseChao: GB: Oh, JRM's gone for good I think
EclipseChao: a thousand keks
EclipseChao: (reminder that the end of 2012 was the deadliest bullet that we somehow dodged)
EclipseChao: okuu no
iKomodo: Pit: WHERE DID YOU LEARN THAT LANGUAGE >:I
iKomodo: SteelKomodo: what a shallow, materialistic fucking jackass
iKomodo: You'll never guess whom I said this about
EclipseChao: yourself?
EclipseChao: dirk?
EclipseChao: JRM?
EclipseChao: the major?
iKomodo: Nope
iKomodo: Rabbit from Winnie the Pooh
EclipseChao: wow, whadda choice
iKomodo: I was watching the Winnie the Pooh thanksgiving special at the time
iKomodo: and it occurred to me just how much of a jackass this one character is when I saw how he condescends to everybody and never learns from his mistakes
iKomodo: like, fuck that guy

---

EclipseChao: "Although the No Limit Soldiers were packaged as a face stable, they failed to connect with the mostly Southern WCW audience. In Master P's first and only appearance on WCW Television, (against the suggestion of the bookers and other wrestlers) he bullied heel wrestler Curt Hennig by rejecting a present he gave to Silkk The Shocker (a custom made cowboy hat) and then assaulting him with a birthday cake. This was perceived as a heel action by the fans and produced a lack of reaction due to confusion because Hennig was a hated heel, but being bullied by a group of people promoted as faces."
Bree: "assaulting him with a birthday cake"
Bree: what even
Bree: how even
Bree: honestly that sounds awesome
iKomodo: I keep thinking of classic Sooty or Chuckle Brothers when I read that
iKomodo: y'know, the old custard pie in the face routine

(later)

A Bit Less Blind: I see Chao is examining WCW stupidity again
A Bit Less Blind: Yes, the No Limit Soldiers vs the West Texas Rednecks are one of the biggest tone deaf moments, though they have competition for like 40 other moments
EclipseChao: i still reread Why WCW Went Out Of Business when i'm on the train sometimes
EclipseChao: it makes for very entertaining reading material

---

Harpy: at this bookstore
Harpy: i got an old cookbook for 3.50
Gooper Blooper: neat
Harpy: 204 recipes to make in 30 minutes
Harpy: ...no, you don't make all of them at once
Harpy: unless you're celestia

Two Weeks

Did you know F-Zero racers can go at normal speeds? It's possible, with the right equipment. Thanks to the ever-handy skills of Josephine's mother Celestia, the Blue Falcon was now street legal. It could drive along on an added set of wheels at a reasonable pace, or - when needed - tuck in the wheels and go right back to its' ludicrously fast ways.

So it was now that Josephine was cruising towards the Las Vegas Strip, her eyes shining with wonder and desire at the neon lights.

In the back seat, Gloria rolled her eyes, her face buried in a book about Las Vegas' history. "You know, Josephine, you got lucky last year. They say the house always wins."

"House didn't beat me."

"It will. You realize that these places couldn't stay in business if the odds were 50/50, let alone in your favor? Keep playing, and you're bound to lose."

"Only if I'm unlucky. And I feel like pressing my luck."

"Don't say I didn't warn you."

"C'mon, Gloria, loosen up."

"Hey, I'm just looking out for you."

"Ugh, I know, but..." Josephine sighed. "You know something? Everyone in our family has changed except you."

"What? What are you talking about?"

"Sarah found herself, and helped us change job classes. And since then, she's matured and grown a lot as a person. I've gained confidence in myself. Ariel's gotten stronger after being tempered by trials like The Society. Mom was freed from Tiamat and found her calling as a baker... and a mechanic, and a theme park owner... sheesh, she does a lot. And Dad... well, he was DEAD! But you're the same old stuffy boring Gloria."

"I resent that." Gloria huffed. "I opened my own library."

"You always wanted to do that. That's not a change."

"I became a summoner!"

"That hasn't changed who YOU are, sis."

"Well, so what? Maybe I like being boring." Gloria said, looking back at her book. "I mean, someone around here has to keep a cool head. You guys are rowdy enough, but this city is like a drug. Especially for you. This family needs a designated driver."

"That's Dad's job. C'mon - you're young, you're experienced, and you're frittering away the best years of your life doing nothing but reading!"

"Reading is fast becoming a lost art. Someone needs to preserve the traditions of the past."

"Okay, look. A couple years ago, Ariel took me to the ZFS King of Beasts to help me come out of my shell and stop caring so much about stupid shit like dress sizes and magazines. Now it's my turn to help someone."

They came to a stoplight. Josephine grimaced briefly at the line of traffic in front of her, but then took the opportunity to turn her head to look at Gloria, and jabbed a finger at her.

"You? You're gonna have fun in Las Vegas."

"I had fun last year."

"You didn't even scratch the surface of the Vegas experience. Well, no more. You're going to see the shows."

"Well, okay."

"And you're gonna gamble."

"Ugh... Must I?"

"And eat at the Heart Attack Grill."

"You wouldn't."

"I would. Gloria, you're getting the full Vegas treatment this year! And you can take that to the bank!"

"The only things I'll be taking to the bank after this are an IOU and raised cholesterol..."

Josephine shook her head, chuckling, and then heard someone honk their horn at her. She hurriedly looked back at the road and saw the cars moving, and the Blue Falcon lurched back into motion. With one hand on the wheel, the chemist flipped on the radio, looking for a station...

Chatzy Madness Volume 246: You Are About To Install Raven's Cry

Jumpropeman: im glad to see Hippaul made chatzy madness
ivel: it would have been madness not to include him
Pulsar Ven: ​. . . ​ ​Madness?​
THIS
*IS*
-trips and falls into pit before finishing-

---

Jumpropeman: any trust I once held for Cornwind has been utterly destroyed
ConstellationChao: is it because he stole your corn
ConstellationChao: your popped corn
Jumpropeman: I looked up the SNES Lion King game when he said it was better, and it turns out: the SNES and Genesis game are exactly the same
ConstellationChao: GASP
ConstellationChao: how ​could​ he
Harpy: i was about to ask "wait is that serious"
Harpy: and then
Gooper Blooper: I knew that already
Harpy: YES THIS IS VERY SERIOUS
Harpy: :U
Jumpropeman: why didn't you tell me Gooper ; o ;
Gooper Blooper: I assumed he was going into full 16-bit console war mode and was comparing minor technical aspects like the music
Pulsar Ven: Oh, the atrocity. Oh, the inhumanity. Oh, the unadulterated wickedness.
Gooper Blooper: "THIS GAME RUNS BETTER ON THE COLECOVISION THAN THE ATARI 2600"

---

Gooper Blooper: I noticed when I looked up Bravely Second on Amazon a minute ago they were offering 20 percent off all new releases
Gooper Blooper: which is pretty crazy if true
Jumpropeman: mhm, that's part of the prime savings
Jumpropeman: that i mentioned
Gooper Blooper: well damn son that's eight bucks off a brand new copy of BS
Gooper Blooper: what can I do with the 18 dollars I'll have left over, hmm...
Gooper Blooper: (I have 50 dollars in amazon gift cards from christmas)
Jumpropeman: I've considered preordering Bravely Second myself too
Harpy: nice
Gooper Blooper: I wasn't going to, I was going to buy on release day, but then I saw the little notification that promises Prime members who preorder will get it on release day
Gooper Blooper: Amazon isn't fucking around here
ConstellationChao: oh
ConstellationChao: oh my
Gooper Blooper: "20 PERCENT OFF STRAIGHT TO YOUR DOOR ON RELEASE DAY. PUT THAT IN YOUR PIPE AND SMOKE IT, GAMESTOP"

---

Draco quits job to play Bravely Second.
Draco: "Boss, I don't have time to 5S. I need to BS."
Pulsar Ven: Draco no! You'll never afford Bravely Third that way!
Draco: "WAIT, LET ME REPHRASE THAT."

Title Reign

"Your winner, and still VEW Champion... SIIIIIIILENNNNNNNCE!"

Silence raised her arms in victory, standing over the fallen form of Regirock. It had been quite a match, but Silence had managed to come out on top once again. She soaked in the cheers and slowly made her way to the back, where Blade was waiting for her.

"Another fantastic title defense, Silence." Blade gave her a thumbs up, and she responded in kind.

---

Not much later, after Silence had gotten a chance to recover and take a shower, she and Blade were walking home under the neon glow of Vegas. Silence's apartment was nothing to write home about, but it suited them well enough and there was space for both of them.

"So, Silence... Have you been putting any thought into your successor?"

Silence nodded. She had been thinking about it for a while. At some point during the "kobber season", she was most likely going to drop the belt. She'd had a fantastic run so far, having defended successfully against most of the federation plus a few special guests. From December's "Christmas Carnage" PPV to February's "St. Valentine's Day Massacre" PPV, she'd come out on top again and again. But it couldn't last forever. The hard part was picking the right man - or woman - for the job. Silence's role as the face of VEW and her many intense victories (not to mention, of course, her status as the Big Bar Brawl champion) had given the belt an incredible amount of prestige for an indy fed. Whoever took the belt had to be good, real good.

As for that Brawl... she suspected that was another title she'd be losing in the summer, as well. No champion had ever successfully defended their trophy in the Brawl. ROB, Doomrider, General Cleft, and Mac Tonight had all returned the year after their victories for another crack, and all of them had fallen - Mac by Silence's own hand. She wondered if the next champion would take her out as well.

...It was funny. Silence had worked so hard to climb the mountain, and last year she'd done it. She'd won the Brawl, launched her federation, ruled over said federation, and even finally delivered justice to the scum that had mutilated her and sent her on this path in the first place. She'd conquered her fears and achieved her greatest life goals, all in one summer... but now, she would most likely spend this next summer falling back down to earth. Every title reign eventually ended in a loss, one way or another, after all.

But that was okay. Silence didn't mind too much. Nobody could ever take away what she accomplished in 2015, even if she jobbed in every match and Fite she participated in from now until she retired from wrestling. She was content. As for retirement... Silence had been doing rough physical brawling for eight years now. Six years in VEW, a year aboard the ZFS, and then a year here in Vegas participating as both a kobber and a VEW wrestler. Silence knew all too well what happens to a wrestler who stays in the business too long. There was a time when she wouldn't have cared that much, but now that she had her sister back... and a best friend to stick with... she didn't want to ever wind up in that position. No, she would get out of the business in a couple more years, probably. Maybe do something a bit less strenuous, like work as a trainer or a coach. And she could make a mean brownie!

But as nice as that all sounded... Silence wasn't ready to retire. Not yet. She had a fire inside her, a burning determination to succeed. It was the part of her she drew on for her biggest victories. Her showdown with Cauren, when the giantess towered over her and many other people would have crumpled to the ground in despair. Her bloody Extreme Rules match with Sasha Banks, a small but wily opponent who had made Silence a bleeding wreck by the end of their fight. The showdown with The Black Mage atop Luxor, with her friends sharing her rage at a horrible human being. Every time it seemed Silence was down and out, she'd rise up one more time with that fire powering her. And the fire was still burning, even now. It had been five months since she'd last seen most of the kobbers, and she was itching to return to the battlefield, having been consistently unable to show up whenever something DID happen, like the fights that OOO guy she'd heard about kept getting into.

Someday, maybe even soon, she would lose. Her reigns would come to an end, work or shoot. And someday she would stop fighting and settle down.

But Silence was not the sort of girl to go down without a good fight.

Chatzy Madness Volume 245: Hippity Jumpscotch Twirlyroo

Jumpropeman: is doctor who an omniglot
The Terrible Pokerpiller: His TARDIS has a universal translator on board
The Terrible Pokerpiller: Hence explaining why everyone speaks English
The Terrible Pokerpiller: He has been stated to speak 'Baby'
The Terrible Pokerpiller: So....I guess so
The Terrible Pokerpiller: They poked a little fun at this with the 9th Doctor, who was played by an actor who had a very clear subset English accent
The Terrible Pokerpiller: His first companion asks him if he's an alien, why he sounds like he's from "The North"
The Terrible Pokerpiller: The Doctor irritably replies "LOTS OF PLANETS HAVE A NORTH!"
Jumpropeman: oh my god i want to see Doctor Who having a conversation with a Baby like its Baby Geniuses or something
Jumpropeman: i will note I know his name is just The Doctor, but I forget that until I finish writing out my latest thought

---

---

N Goat: Here's a blogpost I want; Marina's continued adventures with RVPA
Littlefinger: well well well
Littlefinger: you may be in for a surprise
Littlefinger: except for the fact i just hinted at one
Littlefinger: you may be in for a fulfilled hint
N Goat: Yaaaaay
N Goat claps exitedly

(It happened!) 

Fading Away

 I'm tired.

What year is it, again? 2016? Wow. Time really does fly. The good old days are long gone, but if I close my eyes, sometimes I can still reach out and almost, almost feel them again.

Me? I'm a member of a small group of folks who live in a quiet place in Las Vegas. Yes, such places exist. A lot of action happens in this city, but we're on the fringe, just like how we're fringe in everything else.

Sometimes, I try to shut out the rest of the world. I immerse myself in my music, and try to force the old days to reappear. The sixties, the seventies, the eighties... even the nineties. Anything but these "New Tens". Not this. Not this world, not this "advanced" technology...

Heard last year about the Alruthines. A race of subterranean creatures who tried to wipe out modern technology because it emitted certain pulses that paralyzed them. Some of the folks here were rooting for them, and I wasn't surprised, but of course the kobbers took care of that. Now the Alruthines are finding their own way in things. Some sticking around, some going into hiding, some moving away...

...We don't have those options. We're running out of time.

I don't feel old. At least, I don't think I do. The descriptions of old age I've read in books don't match up, not quite. But it's close. I mean, I don't have the same kind of body people do. I look like a person on the outside, but anyone that sticks around me for long can figure me out. Most of my friends here can't even manage that.

My energy is ebbing away, though. A little bit at a time. A little bit more every year. Every time someone downloads an MP3, or uses Spotify. My hair's been getting grey streaks in it for a while now, and it can be hard to get up in the morning. I'm not the only one who's had that problem, either. I know we're in danger if we don't do something.

Some of my friends, they suggested we use the kobbers. They think if we interact with them, they could make us strong again... but the kobbers love newer technology. They have crazy robots and machines there, made by brilliant mechanics. I have to admit, even our own mechanic probably couldn't measure up. But... some of us think we have to fight them. Because of that, I mean. We're a proud group... a group of excuses. Surely it's the rest of the world who's wrong, right? It's not that we're inferior. Can't be. Especially because if we are... then maybe we're supposed to go away? Maybe this is just the natural order of things? But we don't want to go. We want to do what we did so long ago... make people happy, entertain them, enrich their lives in ways this new stuff can never manage. That's what we believe. So they say they have to fight the kobbers, because if we win, it would prove we aren't inferior.  I don't want to fight them. They scare me. But what's happening to me is scaring me even more...

I don't know if I'm going to have a choice for much longer.

FORMAT WARS

COMING SUMMER 2016

43 Games I Haven't Reviewed Yet

For years, I've been doing mini-reviews of my video games. I started with the "100 Games" project in January 2013, and since then have done a roundup of everything I beat each year. But that means that some games got left out - ones I didn't include on my initial list.

Not getting on the original 100 Games list doesn't mean these games are bad. On the contrary, I rather enjoyed quite a few of them, and some of them probably deserved to make the list. I never claimed to be good at ranking stuff, as fun as it is.

As usual, only games I cared about enough to see to the end get listed here, and everything I haven't already written about is up for grabs. Sifting through my Backloggery turned up 43 entries' worth of games (a few games are combined into one entry). Instead of trying to rank them, I'll cover them alphabetically.

I've also linked a gameplay video for each game. It's a longplay whenever one is available. Looking at how few games DIDN'T have a complete longplay up on YouTube speaks volumes as to how good longplayers are at doing their job.

Grabbing and Going

It was the end of March. New York City, being in a northern part of the United States, was coming out of winter at around this time. But that was long ago for the King of Beasts. Now, they were headquartered in Las Vegas, Nevada, and winter had never had much of a grip here. The heat of the Nevada desert city was what Mary Bishop knew - well, as much as a pasty, bespectacled, air-conditioned inaction girl like herself could know.

"Huh. Gonna hit 88 degrees on Tuesday." she said quietly, looking at the screen behind her counter. This was Mary's "data center" - a bulky computer and security system that looked to have fallen out of 2002 or so, but was sophisticated enough to manage all of Grab-N-Go's needs. She could pull up a homepage that aggregated local news and weather, or browse footage from the three security cameras in the store - one pointed at the register, another in the back of the store by the alcoholic drinks, and a third manning the storeroom. She'd often browse the Internet during slow periods. There were very few slow days at Grab-N-Go, but no shortage of slow periods.

Of course, a slow period had to end sometime.

The man strolled in, looking nervously around. He had a ski mask covering his features, and you'd only wear a ski mask in the heat of Vegas for one reason. Mary looked him over as he hesitated again. The nervousness, the pauses, and he was shaking. Whoever this guy was, he was new at this. She calmly extended one hand under her counter, flipping a switch, and continued to watch the masked man.

Finally, he came to a decision upon realizing the store was empty aside from Mary and himself, and he did what Mary knew he would do and pulled out a weapon. A standard-issue pistol. Nothing crazy, but more than enough to kill Mary easily. He brandished the gun, forcing out the words "Th-this is a holdup! Open the cash register!"

Mary complied.

"C-count it out!" he sputtered, waving around the gun. Mary rolled her eyes internally - the lack of experience with a gun was blatantly clear. Absolutely a first-timer, for sure. She counted out the money, totaling to five hundred and sixty-seven dollars and 48 cents, and slid it across the counter. He snatched it up sloppily, coins scattering in his grip, and he turned and ran out of the store. Mary closed the register and opened a new window on her PC. She noted the message that popped up and began to type.

-All clear?
-All clear. Took the bait.
-Description?
-White male, about six feet. Wore a ski mask, had a pistol, was extremely nervous. No gun training.
-We got him on radar. Thank you.

The police nabbed the robber less than five minutes later. The tracking chip embedded in one of the bills was barely needed, but it was good insurance against smarter criminals. And, of course, all of the money save the change was counterfeit.

Mary knelt down, double-checking the real cash register that was placed directly below the decoy one. Several thousand in assorted bills, all accounted for as usual.

-Mary? We got him.
-Great. Can you get my play money back to me when you get a chance?
-Of course. Thanks again.
-No, thank you.

Grab-N-Go didn't get robbed very often.

There were reasons for that.

The American Dream...?

-UNKNOWN LOCATION - SOMEWHERE IN WESTERN USA-

"My fellow Americans... Together, we have witnessed the decay of our home country. We have seen our once-mighty lands become weak, dependent, and limp. We rely on China for cheap goods... we import oil from the Middle East... and the two dominating political parties will find any excuse to butt heads.

But worst of all, is our increasing dependence on the King Of Beasts."

The man on stage began to pace.

"A ragtag band of monsters, superheroes, magicians, and storybook knights. They have done the impossible, conquered the unconquerable, and are in control of vast sums of money. Some civilians fear them, others worship them. Sound familiar?"

He looked out at the assembled audience. "That used to be us. That was US, dammit. The good ol' U.S. of A! Our President, he tries his best - I envy that robotic suit - but it's not enough to coexist with them. Not when they're stealing the glory of America. No, we need to outdo them. We need to prove our superiority. We need to... well, to borrow a phrase, we need to Make America Great Again.

And that is why, gentlemen, I have decided to run for President."

"Under what party, sir?" a man in the crowd asked.

"Neither of them. The Democrats are too weak-willed, and the Republicans tie themselves in knots arguing with each other. I am in Independent. And before you start with the old saw of third parties being failures, I have a plan. One that will make Ross Perot look like Ralph Nader."

"Well, what is it? Tell us!" another man said eagerly.

"Hah... not yet. This is absolutely critical information, and must be kept classified at all costs. Suffice it to say I've spent the better part of a decade getting ready, and that my terms as a senator aren't for nothing.

There's something out there, gentlemen. Something the King Of Beasts has no idea exists. Something that has the power to blow away anyone who opposes our great nation... without the lingering damage of a nuclear weapon. It will take an expert to find what we need, but fortunately for us, that's exactly what I have in store.

A new age is dawning, one with me at the helm. Me: Nevada Senator, Trent Johnson. Under my rule, we will no longer rely on any other country for anything! We will ascend back to our rightful place as the greatest country in the world!"

Senator Johnson raised his fist.

"My America... will be the most unstoppable America of all time!"

Chatzy Madness Volume 244: This Book Will Steam Your Dumplings

Jumpropeman: I'm an unfortunate creature who will let good things pass him by if I cannot consume them on my own terms
Jumpropeman: *changed between first, second, and third person like four times in that sentence*
FV: It's true. I once when we were much the younger squalls saw him turn away chocolate pizza at a Mr Gatti's because he couldn't watch Spongebob on the screen at the same time as getting food.
Jumpropeman: that cannot be true
Jumpropeman: as there is no such thing as a Spongebob
FV: Liar. -pat- There was no 'you' person perspective. =v Can't have been second. There was first and third, certainly.
Jumpropeman: doest thou meaneth the 'Bob?
FV: Your apologies, your grace. The 'Bob was meant.
Jumpropeman: (plus I don't like Chocolate pizza so maybe I simply was fishing for an excuse to refuse it :V)
FV: Tis a possible thing certainly. =v

---

PlanetaryChao: remember 2013, when premium was this mysterious thing that we'd never have
PlanetaryChao: and then daniel bryan opened the floodgates
Draco: YES YES YES YES
Cornwind Evil: And then his head exploded and he retired
Cornwind Evil: ....now I'm sad.

---

Cornwind Evil: Sine has made a new short film
Tyrion Lannister: cant watch vidjas at work
Tyrion Lannister: but i can watch you do a sprightly jig if you're willing

---

Tyrion Lannister: just went into a restroom and finished my business before I noticed the yellow sign on the floor was not a Wet Floor but a Bathroom Closed sign
Cornwind Evil: Oops
J Jonah Delson: Whoops
Tyrion Lannister: thankfully though, no Poops
J Jonah Delson: Hahaha

---

PlanetaryChao: did anyone see in review mode the one bit i remembered from my dream
Gooper Blooper: could you repost it, I glanced through review mode and there was a lot to sift through
PlanetaryChao: just get gud at reading like me :I
Gooper Blooper: I can't, chao-senpai :<
PlanetaryChao: goops it's like you don't want me to notice you :I
PlanetaryChao: i had a dream of which all i can remember is the title of a short story
PlanetaryChao: which was "The Bog in the Meadow-lands"
PlanetaryChao: what made it stand out was the way meadowlands was spelled
Gooper Blooper: Immediately upon seeing that
Gooper Blooper: I thought "that is 100% sheep"
Gooper Blooper: Sheep would write something called The Bog in the Meadow-lands, dash and all
Juju Gent: I believe I asked if the King in Yellow would have jurisdiction in The Bog in the Meadow-lands. =u And then I remembered that the reference might not actually be gotten.

(later, upon being shown this sequence)

Mouldering Sheep: I resemble that remark

Character Musings: Sonder at the Cheap Shop

I first designed Mary Bishop in 2014. I wanted another OC after creating Silence, and Mary was the next at-bat after the character I called "Violet" had turned into Viola and ceased being a full OC. Similar to Silence, the concept was for a "normal" human character without any superpowers. Unlike Silence, however, Mary was designed to be a non-action character primarily used for dialogue.

I've talked a bit before about how urban setting fascinate me, and how a city lit up at night is one of the most gorgeous settings I can imagine, which is a major reason behind why I suggested Las Vegas as an RP setting - this city is famous worldwide for its' presentation and lights, and it seemed to be one of the few cities that even the real-life version of is crazy enough for the kobbers to call home. Now, obviously a big part of that glitz is the big stuff - casinos, novelty hotels, carnivals, concerts, and so on. But there's more to a city than that.

If you're not familiar with "sonder", allow me to introduce you. The term, as you can see above, has deep implications for a big city. All those individual people living their own lives in the same place, but experiencing completely different perspectives. The term was coined as a negative one that induces sadness, but I personally find it beautiful and inspiring. Mary was birthed from my own sonder daydreams of life in the city as I romanticize it. She is a mere convenience store cashier. She sees hundreds of people each day, and is a tiny part of their lives, and they a tiny part of hers. She is a small but important piece of machinery in the colossus that is Vegas.

I imagined walking down the streets of Las Vegas on a summer's night, a neon sign leading you to Grab-N-Go, Mary's store. It's a small shop, but it's packed to the rafters with all kinds of odds and ends. The stock is designed to appeal to people who suddenly find themselves in need of some small something-or-other. A snack. A small tool. Batteries. The daily paper. And so on. And then there's Mary - small yet cool as a cucumber, not necessarily friendly but not rude or intimidating. You'd feel safe around her, even if she wouldn't easily be a close pal. Then you Grab your item of choice, pay, and Go, back into the neon world outside, leaving Mary to her little shop.

I know this is probably hard to get across, and it could well sound stupid, but I really feel like magic can be made out of little everyday things like that if they're given the proper atmosphere. I've always heavily touted "atmosphere" as being something I treasure - it's what sucks me into a video game or a story. When it happens during RP (usually when someone posts a really good blog post or a satisfying forum post with lots of text), I get excited. RP is at its' best when I can read it slowly, imagining it playing out in my head. This feeling more than any other (except perhaps the adrenaline rush of reading an intense Fite) is what I cherish about roleplaying the most (not counting the friendships I've made, naturally - I mean in terms of the actual RP itself).

So, uh, Mary! Aside from my own daydreaming, Mary was meant to be a down-to-earth ordinary non-Kobber-type whose main draws were her deadpan-ness and her normal-ness. No matter what ridiculous situation you gave to Mary, the most you'd get in response would likely be a raised eyebrow. Of course, this meant I could use "Mary actually emotes to something" as a way to add impact to special moments.

Speaking of special moments, how about that family tree reveal? (Several people LOVED it and that made me very happy.) Mary was originally not related to Silence at all, but I thought of the idea early in Season 5 and eagerly canonized it, especially since it gave me a surprise reveal I could do. While they had similar-colored hair, Mary and Silence were otherwise very, very different - this was ideal. It kept the reveal plausible without giving it away blatantly, so when I started teasing hints that there was a connection between the two of them, people noticed - but weren't sure exactly what the connection was. It was a great way to add depth to both characters.

Later in the year, Mary began going on plots once I figured out a way she could meaningfully contribute - as a stats buffer! Mary took her selling on the road with a backpack and pop-up stand, selling tractor-boosting items. In Season 6, I plan to expand her product range a bit to include non-food items that could be of use in certain plot segments - she could navigate a dark place with a flashlight, mess with a machine using a screwdriver, distract a dumb guard with thrown patchisaurs - there's plenty of options!

Silly aside - I associate Mary with the Scott Pilgrim video game. That game is full of tiny little convenience stores you can buy stuff from, and the music track used there does a fantastic job of conveying the feelings of enjoyably browsing a store like Mary's, so I naturally made it her character theme. Additionally, her simple, short design looks vaguely like the SP sprites and she'd probably translate to that style fairly seamlessly. Kim Pine and Kim Pine's deadpan expression may have been a subconscious design aid, too.

About Jinako... It's ridiculous to think that two girls could run Grab-N-Go all by themselves. That works out to 12-hour shifts seven days a week, since Grab-N-Go never closes. So in case you were wondering about that... there are other employees. But, for the sake of conservation of detail, simplicity, and not having to use a bunch of interchangeable minor employee characters, Jinako is the only other one we ever see, and the default one to appear if Grab-N-Go becomes the center of attention at a time Mary is busy elsewhere. She and Mary are close friends, and the two of them are the real brains behind the store and its' success.

I've very happy with the little group of Silence, Blade, and Mary - or, as Chao called them in a PM to me, The Power Trio. Not since the Sarahkin have I made a character group I was this satisfied at the reception and development of. I've considered having 2016 be their final year, and it would make sense for them to stay in Vegas as the kobbers move on to new adventures in another part of the world, but... I can't rule out their returns for sure, because the three of them presented interesting new opportunities and challenges for me, and I've grown very fond of all three. It's also possible that someday Mary could pass the torch to Jinako, and she becomes the important one in a future season. Who can say for sure? Given the way RP changes over time, not even me.

Chatzy Madness Volume 243: Fun Is A Nonexistent Variable

SteelKomodo: um
SteelKomodo: i made a thing
SteelKomodo: based on some stuff Chao showed me

ShiningChao: sk, please
SteelKomodo: i regret... something?
ShiningChao: you just Regret
ShiningChao: in general
SteelKomodo: indeed

---

iKomodo: Ash-Greninja seems to be an anime only thing, basically Greninja gets a power boost but Ash feels any damage he takes
ShiningChao: you know what else was an anime only thing?
ShiningChao: ZYGARDE BEING IMPORTANT
ShiningChao: *shots fired*
iKomodo: You win the Marie award for best zinger

Character Musings: Expose the Esoteric

Fite Club graduates are not a foreign concept to the community. You know how it is - you play as a character for Fite Club or maybe even the Bonus Boss Pavilion, and you wind up getting attached to them and suddenly they're a regular character. So it was with Sumireko Usami, my contribution to the big Touhou bandwagon (while I had earlier played Letty Whiterock and Rin Satsuki, they were both minor characters with little to no future prospects).

And that's how I wound up with this dork as one of my central characters.

It all began the day Urban Legend In Limbo, the game Sumireko debuted in, was released. Chao, our resident Touhou expert, pointed out the intensity of the series' fanbase by showing artwork of Sumireko on Pixiv that was uploaded shortly after the game's release despite her being the final boss of the game, meaning people had IMMEDIATELY purchased it, then IMMEDIATELY played through the entire game to the final boss (not as hard a thing to do as usual, since this one was an arcade-style 2D fighter instead of a bullet hell shmup), saw Sumireko, and drew fanart of her. The below picture managed to be the very first one uploaded, save for a couple of "speculation" pictures that were what people thought Sumireko would look like when all that was known was her name.

The design immediately caught my eye. Cool hat, cool cape, cool hair, glasses (rare on a touhou character), and a pose that radiated confidence. This girl thinks she's a badass. But, at the end of the day, I ultimately considered her to be nothing more than a neat idea for a Fite Club. Specifically, a magician-off with Kaito. Sumireko is not a magician in canon, but I went with it for a few different reasons:

1: Her outfit makes her look like a magician

2: It made her fit in to the setting better (Las Vegas is famous for its' many magic acts!)

3: The personality I envisioned her with made "stage magician" a career choice she'd be likely to pick

And so ZFRP Sumireko was born. She was still only going to be a Fite Club opponent, and made only one brief cameo after that before Harpy began her oft-talked-about three-event Touhou plot that invited everyone with a Touhou character to send them. I went ahead and sent Sumireko to the first event, and as I tried to feel out her personality, her hamminess got emphasized. By the end of the plot, several people told me how much they enjoyed her, and on the spur of the moment I decided she would attend every other event in Harpy's plot as well. Then I decided she would also attend every event in the larger plot that Touhou Plot was part of. And she also attended every Alruthine event, because by that point I had researched Sumireko a bit more and found to my delight that she was an amateur paranormal investigator with a deep interest in the occult. Not only does the same subject fascinate me, I already had Viola, who shared Sumireko's interest, but approached it in a different way and had different focuses within the category. This was an easy hook to get Sumireko in with my other characters, and resulted in the forming of the Chaoservice Contingent thanks to Gloria also sharing some interests with Sumireko. Overall, the three of them just felt like a perfect fit to be friends.

It took a while, but Sumireko eventually managed to develop into a full and proper character after the initial "test run" of only sending her on certain plots. She began making normal appearances in the bar and also popped up on plots that weren't part of her initial scope. By then I knew she was sticking around for the long haul, but like a lot of my debuts, she didn't get her own plot right away. She's getting it this year, though, and I have grand plans!

You know, one of my favorite things about RP is when I manage to really make people happy with my writing. I've gotten a lot of you to smile or laugh with Sumireko, and that's just great. I'm happy I could entertain you with this nerd.

Chatzy Madness Volume 242: Bad News From The Gorilla Galaxy

Eggchao: nobody likes jr. troopa
Eggchao: everyone cheered when okuu beat him up
Paper Mario: 2016 final boss: Jr. Troopa
Paper Mario: he done stole a mecha, by gawd
Paper Mario: HE'LL SQUASH PIT AND PAPER MARIO IN ONE FELL SWOOP
Paper Mario: or something
SteelKomodo: oh god D:

---

Eggchao: the only thing that could bury Vyse or Magnolia when it's her turn
Eggchao: is Sarah
Eggchao: ​because she is so large
Paper Mario: SHE IS LARGE AND POINTING
Paper Mario: WHAT THE FUCK
Gooper Blooper: hahahahaha I remember that
Eggchao: I AM LARGE
Eggchao: i still wonder what the original cover was
Eggchao: i found the original
Eggchao: and
Eggchao: it's still weird
Gooper Blooper: link
Gooper Blooper: 2slow
Eggchao: slower than patchy?
Gooper Blooper: SHE IS LARGE AND READING
Paper Mario: my what the fuck remains largely unchanged

---

Eggchao: in Bravely Second, if you beat random encounters in one turn, you get offered the chance to have another battle for bonus EXP, JP, and gold, and can keep cycling
Eggchao: it's not mandatory, there's also a "no i'm done" button
Gooper Blooper: Interesting
Gooper Blooper: sounds like a way to make grinding even less painless than it already was in BD
Gooper Blooper: NOW YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO WALK AROUND, THE BATTLES WILL COME TO YOU
Gooper Blooper: ...oh god
Gooper Blooper: I just remembered the BD skill that instantly kills enemies if they're low-level
Eggchao: are you also imagining ​infinite obliterate
Eggchao: YES
Eggchao: just mash l over and over
Gooper Blooper: a never-ending conveyor belt of enemies waddling to their death
Gooper Blooper: while your party just sits there
Eggchao: that's a detail i appreciate
Eggchao: they made the "yes give me another random battle" button L instead of A
Eggchao: so you can't screw yourself over with button mashing
Gooper Blooper: See, these Bravely guys are smart
Gooper Blooper: I like the cut of their jib

(later)

Chao: would you guys like to know the change to the bestiary
Chao: it's really cool - each entry starts with a basic description
Chao: and as you beat more of each enemy, you get notes added by the player characters (up to four notes)
Chao: bosses and other one-time enemies get the full set added right away
Gooper Blooper: Ah, nice
ivel: huh
ivel: that is neat
Paper Mario: considering you'll be fighting these enemies
Paper Mario: like
Paper Mario: a lot
Gooper Blooper: I'm pretty sure the BD bestiary was written by Ringabel, considering the description always snuck in a compliment for the female humanoid enemies
Paper Mario: "ugh i've been fighting slimes for fucking ever, i wonder what magnolia has to say about it"
Chao: yeah, that'd make sense
Paper Mario: ringabel did it
Paper Mario: he always does it
Gooper Blooper: it was his journal, after all
Paper Mario: but how does he do it
Paper Mario: ​sexily

---

Draco: Parsee was almost jealous that people don't make cute cards of her, but then she remembered that she's not a Pokemon.
Draco: ​She's an elf.
ivel: so Magic the Gathering then?
Jumpropeman: and she'll never be one, not with that attitude
Gooper Blooper: Parsee the elf jokes
Gooper Blooper: good times
Gooper Blooper: ​DRINK CHOCOLATE MILK, ELF​
Draco rolled a die with 21 sides. The die showed: 13
Draco: Parsee drinks chocolate milk.