Chatzy Madness Volume 33: Ozonic the Freshener

SteelKomodo: I've been pronouncing Dr. Seuss wrong all this time
SteelKomodo: apparently, it's German, so it rhymes with "voice"
SteelKomodo: but that sounds too weird for me, like the noise a character in a YouTube Poop might make
Saberwulf: Soyss
SteelKomodo: yes, like that
Saberwulf: "For tha last time, Scorp—I don't want any a'ya Soyss Boygas!"
Saberwulf: All I can think of is Joe
SteelKomodo: XD
RedSpy: SOYSS SOYSS SOYS
Saberwulf: Soysslent Green

---

TheDeleter: btw me and bus agreed that Del and Eshe started a band and invented Vampire Metal and lived happily ever after
Gooper Blooper: DelEsheious
TheDeleter: you heard it here folks

Spitfire

-?????-

"'They've got the best bars in the tri-county area', you said. 'We'll just be in and out', you said! Why did I ever listen to you?!"
"Goddamn it man, now's not the time!"

Papers fluttered along the street, kicked up by the small gusts of wind created by a housefly the size of a large dog. Clinging to the fly for dear life was a monstrous four-foot leech. The fly's panicked bumbling path swerved away from cars and over trash cans before ducking into an alley.

"We can lay low here." The fly crawled atop a dumpster and began feeding.
"What are you doing?!"
"Refueling, man, is that okay? Jeez."
"We have to be on full alert here, who knows where they are! They have eyes everywhere, you know." the leech hissed.
"No way, man. We lost 'em. Calm the hell down and grab a bite, eh?"

"Well, hellooooooo."

Chatzy Madness Volume 32: A Gorillion Jimmies

RedSpy: iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii​iiii
RedSpy: . . . Fucking controller
RedSpy: Stop sitting on my keyboard
SteelKomodo: SPY NO D:
TheDeleter: woah there maurice
RedSpy goes to run ONE errand and look what happens
Saberwulf: Hahahahaha
SteelKomodo: lolz
TheDeleter: pffft

---

TheDeleter: lately I've been seeing which of the trivia questions on my advent calender can be answered with "YOUR MOM"
SteelKomodo: same with my shitty jokes
TheDeleter: about 60% success rate so far
TheDeleter: "What traditionally goes on top of the Christmas tree?" "YOUR MOM"
TheDeleter: "Who helps Santa make the toys?" "YOUR MOM"
SteelKomodo: XD
TheDeleter: "What do people do underneath mistletoe?" "YOUR MO- err..."
SteelKomodo: XD:
TheDeleter: "What transport does Santa use for delivering gifts?" "YOUR MOM"
Saberwulf: pff
TheDeleter: I know, it's childish, but i can't help but try
SteelKomodo: true that

Chatzy Madness Volume 31: Crazy-Ass Jam of Knights

SteelKomodo: You know how Goops can't look at any FF stuff without shoehorning his RP into it?
TheDeleter: yeeeaaaaah?
SteelKomodo: Yeah, turns out i shouldn't be one to talk
SteelKomodo: http://www.bigbadtoystore.com/bbts/product.aspx?product=SYC10011&mode=retail
TheDeleter: pffft
SteelKomodo: Read the description for this and kept thinking "no, this is wrong"
TheDeleter: IT'S NICKYPOO
Gooper Blooper joined the chat
Gooper Blooper: A traitor to Edenia, Rain becomes a servant of Shao Khan, participating in the latter’s invasion of the Earthrealm, however he later defects from Khan’s forces, endeavoring to defeat Taven and Daegon with the longer-term intention of defeating Blaze to gain the latter’s immense power. A master of water and lightning, Rain boasts an arsenal of signature moves including the Shocking Orb and the Water Blast.
Gooper Blooper: hold on, I can fix this
Gooper Blooper: A traitor to Edenia, Rain becomes a servant of Shao Khan, participating in the latter’s invasion of the Earthrealm, however he later defects from Khan’s forces, endeavoring to defeat Taven and Daegon The Lord of the Night with the longer-term intention of defeating Blaze to gain the latter’s immense power marrying Stel-Stel. A master of water and lightning, Rain boasts an arsenal of signature moves including the Shocking Orb and the Water Blast wielding a fragment of Christopher Ravensky's sword and dropping fuckin' lightning bolts on people, yo.

---

RedSpy: Ey guys :​D
Gooper Blooper: There you are
Gooper Blooper: The Spy posts in Chatzy when you least expect it
RedSpy: I was Isaacing
Gooper Blooper: oh god, still? It never ends
RedSpy: I bought the expansion
RedSpy: When the remake comes out I'm buying that
RedSpy: Help I've lost all control of my life
Gooper Blooper: You should have seen me and Pokemon back in the early to mid-2000s
Gooper Blooper: I was fucking married to those damn things
Gooper Blooper: "Spy, what are you doing?" "Playing Binding of Isaac." "It's four o'clock in the morning. Why on earth are you playing Binding of Isaac?" "Because I've lost control of my life."
Saberwulf: Speaking of buying lots of video games, I actually used to own basically every version of the Deus Ex Series
Saberwulf: No reason, I just ended up with like every system version of all three games
Gooper Blooper: That's happened to me before. It's like "why do I have so many games in this series"
Gooper Blooper: For me it's Mario Party, because my brother kept buying the new one every year
Saberwulf: Haha, Mario Party
Gooper Blooper: And so we now have Mario Parties 1 through 8
Gooper Blooper: hootenanny
Saberwulf: I own 2 MPs, the first gamecube one and the original
Gooper Blooper: The fifth one is my favorite
Gooper Blooper: Playable Boo is boss
Saberwulf: Playable boo sounds kickass
Gooper Blooper: http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a135/Kracko/PimpBoo.jpg
Saberwulf: Hahahahaha yessss
Gooper Blooper: "Where Lady Bow at?"

Baltan Claus

"Where IS that idiot? The food's going to get cold if he doesn't get his ass in gear."

Chatsy Madness Volume 30 - Chatizzle Madnizz

Harpy: I shall leave this here
Gooper Blooper: "Just some shiznit ta look forward ta fo' yo ass guys"
Gooper Blooper: beautiful
Gooper Blooper: [10:12:54 AM] ivelchild: How tha fuck do tha guildmasta bust two typez of magic
[10:13:08 AM] ivelchild: That thought occurred ta mah crazy ass dis morning
Gooper Blooper: oh my god
Gooper Blooper: I must go mess with this on my own stuff
TheDeleter: holy shit
Harpy: ...this is amazing
TheDeleter: this is amazing
Harpy: OH MY GOD I SHOULD DO THIS TO MONSTER MASH
TheDeleter: i'm gonna do this to freaks now
SteelKomodo: ...oh god what?
Harpy: Monster Mash: Narrated by Snoop Dawg
Gooper Blooper: This post be a database of all of mah characters, shit they've collected, locations I've added ta tha Zoofightz RP-verse, n' chicken n' drink I've contributed ta tha bar fo' realz. As tha stylish gif above says, dis page is Under Construction, n' is ghon be edited ta stay up ta date wit freshly smoked up deetz from B-ta-tha-L-O-Gizzay postz and RP. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. See tha title of tha post fo' tha date it was last updated.
Gooper Blooper: We're off to a great start
SteelKomodo: it's...
SteelKomodo: GLORIOUS
TheDeleter: capitalizzle
Gooper Blooper: "Sarah is, at first glizzle, a fairly typical white mage."
TheDeleter: holy shit
TheDeleter: CAPITALIZZLE
SteelKomodo: "I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. It is no place fo' any sensible sailor."
Gooper Blooper: "Can smoke n' drink far mo' than her size suggestz yo. Has a shockingly high tolerizzle fo' sugar."
Harpy: I AM DYING
Harpy: HELP
Harpy: tolerizzle
SteelKomodo: "It is ghon be a long-ass n' hard as fuck battle yo, but Japanz Top Billin Mascot thinks he can do dat shit."
Inurian: xD

Celestia's Christmas Wish

The snow fell gently but relentlessly, as it had for the last several hours after calming down from the blizzard of last night, slowly floating into and out of view from the window of Celestia's home. After over a year of sharing living space with one or another of her daughters, Celestia had finally gotten her own place to live - a fairly modest home that took up only part of an abandoned building. She'd chosen this building not only for its' low cost, but its' proximity to the bar and - most importantly - her lab.

For whatever reason, people didn't much care for living close to the bar. Odd, that.

She sits, rocking slowly back and forth in an old rocking chair she'd picked up at a yard sale for a steal - no matter how successful Tridenland was, some things never changed.

She was alone in the house, and wasn't working on a project, chatting on the phone with one of her daughters, or doing much of anything except rocking and looking out the window. Her options were limited thanks to the snow taking out some power lines and blocking off roads. For all intents and purposes, she was snowbound for the next several hours until X Demolition could figure out how to dispose of all the snow and restore power.

The rhythmic creaking of the old chair soothes her, as do the floating snowflakes. She takes a deep breath, lets it out, and closes her eyes.

And remembers.

Chatzy Madness Volume 29: Snowmen With Shark Teeth

SteelKomodo: so an arrogant, andro, bisexual, Lawful Evil Merfolk prince and his Pirate Eidolon walk into a bar
SteelKomodo: wat happen
TheDeleter: terrible things
TheDeleter: or great things
TheDeleter: a thousand of each
SteelKomodo: pfffft

---

TheDeleter: http://sphotos-c.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/61658_561491930531505_280393624_n.jpg
SteelKomodo: Snowmen with Shark Teeth
SteelKomodo: It's Official: The BBC have finally run out of ideas.
SteelKomodo: "Fuck it, just give snowmen shark teeth and hope someone has an irrational phobia of it."

The GB Ensemble Royal Rumble - Part 8: Finale

"Ladies and gentlemen, at this time I'd like to thank everyone who's stuck with us through the ups and the downs and the creamy middles of the Barbon's Fite Club and Tavern Royal Rumble!"
"Brought to you by Waluigi's Taco Stand."
"And Pleasure Motors!"
"And Liberty Medical."
"And Colgate as well!"
"Better burn off all these sponsors now, seeing as there's only four people left in this clusterfuck."
"That's right, and with no more entrants these four are all we'll be seeing from here to the end! Who's going to take home the championship belt and the big cash prize?! BAH GAWD I'm pumped!"
"Just don't sweat on me or anything, geez."

The GB Ensemble Royal Rumble - Part 7

The arena is silent. The crowd has largely fled. What few remain watch helplessly or cower in fright. It is quite obvious at this point that Mr. X was not supposed to be here, and that he was fully intending on getting his revenge, and silencing Ariel forever.

The petrified archer stares into the madman's gun barrel. Her white magic was not strong enough to stop point-blank bullets, and there was no time to try a distraction with Blink. Her mother and anyone else who could save her were incapacitated. Mr. X grinned cruelly, one finger curled around his gun's trigger.

In a burst of sparks, a burst of laser energy sent Mr. X's gun flying. Once Ariel processed what just happened, she cast Blink and scurried away. Mr. X, meanwhile, growled and turned to face the source of the attack.

"Who-?!"

"OHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

The GB Ensemble Royal Rumble - Part 6

"I CAN'T SEE SHIT!"
"ME NEITHER! WHAT'S GOING ON IN THERE? Ugh... Folks, if you're just joining us, this is the Barbon's Fite Club and Tavern Royal Rumble. We've seen twenty-four of the thirty contestants enter, and just barely two of them escalated their battle to the next level and tried to blow up the whole ring. The pure white is finally starting to fade and I think my retinas are nearly done oozing down my face so let's see what all's left in the ring!"

The ring is filled with unconscious people. Electra has been blown backwards and is hopelessly tangled up in the ropes. Celestia is in a similar position. Gust is face-down in one part of the arena, while The Necronomitron lies in one corner, its tentacles quivering uncontrollably. Widow Maker is still unable to see, and is clinging for dear life to the body of Marlin the Magnificent, who is flying in large, lazy circles thirty feet above the ring.

"Is that everyone?"
"Where's that blue-assed piece of shit that wandered in as the 24th entry?"
"Oh yeah, Hella Jeff.

...Where IS he?"

BZZZZZZZ

The GB Ensemble Royal Rumble - Part 5

"Well, folks, it has certainly been a night to remember here at Barbon's Fite Club and Taver-"
"Why do you keep repeating the full name every five entrances?"
"We earn a commission for promoting the club. I'm doing MY part! OHOHOHO!"
"...Right, yes. Well, Barbon's Fite Club and Tavern has certainly paid host to a fight tonight the patrons of Barbon's Fite Club and Tavern will never forget, especially as they continue to visit Barbon's Fite Club and Tavern and are reminded of the Barbon's Fite Club and Tavern Royal Rumble each time they look at the hallowed walls of Barbon's-"
"I... don't think it works that way."
"Fuck."
"And remember, our sponsors tonight include Silph! Yes, Silph Company, for all your Pokemon-catching needs!"
"Not to be confused with the daemonette in Accounting."

The GB Ensemble Royal Rumble - Part 4

"Well, ladies and gentlemen, we are here tonight at Barbon's Fite Club and Tavern, currently scared out of our goddamn minds."
"It's chaos here tonight! Entry 15, Tiamat, has eliminated four competitors with barely any effort!"
"Easy enough to understand - she's a hundred feet tall and has six heads and powerful wind magic. How do you stand up against that? You don't. Not in a Rumble."
"At this time we'd like to thank our many sponsors for tonight's entertainment, including Sharp-Dressed Sturge, home of the new Bouteille Boutique line of clothing for generously proportioned ladies! OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"
"Anyway, the buzzer has just rung, but nobody is coming out."
"Guess they aren't interested in fighting Tiamat, and I don't blame 'em! OHOH-"
"Wait, hold on, someone's theme just started. Who is that?"

The GB Ensemble Royal Rumble - Part 3

"And we are BACK. We're coming to you LIVE at Barbon's Fite Club and Tavern, bringing you up-to-the-second coverage of the Royal Rumble, which itself is brought to you by Marrowmunch, crunch into a Marrowmunch now in feed bag size!"
"It's also brought to you by McMechos, home of the Double Triple Bossy Deluxe, a burger that would probably win this rumble if it forced the participants to eat it."
"For those just joining us, we have seen nine of the thirty entrants in the rumble, and two have been eliminated - and don't look now, but I think a third is about to follow!"

Skeiron and Gloria each grasped one of Constructor X's feet.

"READY?"
"Yeah!"
"HEAVE!"

The construction mecha was still propping himself up by his hands after having been nearly eliminated by Garland, and now the summoner and WarMech aimed to shove his feet to the floor to finish the job. Wisps of steam began to leak from his soles, and Gloria realized what was happening just in time.

"NULFIRE!"

A protective red shield blipped into existence around the two partners, allowing the fire bursting suddenly from Constructor X's jet feet to wash over them harmlessly. Both the mage and her robot ally pushed and struggled, Skeiron making more headway for obvious reasons. Constructor X felt himself starting to slip, and dug in with his claw, trying to prevent being shoved off.

Cleptopod, still perched on a top rope, saw the struggle and decided to help eliminate a troublesome-looking contestant. Carefully, he aimed and threw his drill missile, which whirled through the air and slammed into the claw arm of Constructor X, knocking it out from under him. With less of a grip on the ground, the mecha was shifted more easily by Skeiron and Gloria...

The GB Ensemble Royal Rumble - Part 2

"Welcome back to the Royal Rumble! We are seconds away from the arrival of the sixth entrant!"
"Still haven't seen anyone worthy of winning this."

Garland continues to press forward, attacking Little Brother again and again, a smirk beginning to form underneath his helm.

"BIG BROTHER! HELP!"
"ON MY WAY!"
"What-"
Big Brother, having recovered from the Thunder spell, runs over Garland in his haste to aid his brother. The two damaged machines leap into the air and fuse together.

"MORPH BROTHERRRRS... CONSTRUCTORRRRRRR X!!"

BZZZZZZZ

The GB Ensemble Royal Rumble - Part 1

(IMPORTANT NOTE: The following story is non-canon and includes appearances from characters that are dead, presumed dead, or do not formally exist yet in ZFRP. Thank you.)

"OHOHOHOHOHOHOHO! Good evening, sports fans from around the globe!"
"It might be a good evening if I hadn't been roped into this."
"Oh hush now, this is gonna be great!"
"If I wanted to see a bunch of sweaty imbeciles punching each other I could do that from home."
"Come on, where's your spirit of adventure?"
"I think you killed it."
"ANYWAY!-

-We are coming to you LIVE from the newly rebuilt Barbon's Tavern and Fite Club, which has decided to ring in its' return in grand style!"
"Do tell."
"I'd love to, but for details of tonight's entertainment, we must turn to the referee."
"I should have known sarcasm would flit right over your malformed head."

Chatzy Madness Volume 28: The Rolan Jesus

GB: So our FOUR MIGHTY HEROES are now on Floor 90 of the third bonus tower
SteelKomodo: woot!
GB: You may remember that the eightieth floor of every tower has a dragon miniboss
GB: The first tower had Bahamut, the second had Ice Dragon
GB: The third tower's dragon is just called Dragon
SteelKomodo: boo-ring
GB: I'm like "Really?"
GB: He died in three turns
Toothpaste: Its name was actually Draven
SteelKomodo: XD
GB: Taking six meteors to the face is hazardous to your health
Toothpaste: It didn't die. It just let you win
GB: (thanks pit)
SteelKomodo: (woot!)

---

GB: I just realized something
GB: When Paper Mario TTYD first came out I was amazed by the Bowser sidescrolling segments
GB: I thought "they should do a whole game like this"
GB: THEY DID
SteelKomodo: IT WAS CALLED SUPER PAPER MARIO
SteelKomodo: =D
Harpy: ahahah
Harpy: yes

We Serve FOOD Here, Miss

Snow was lightly falling this early December eve, and two young and rather short women were on their way to pick up some fast food.

But this was no ordinary burger run.

"Sarah, this is utterly ridiculous. They aren't even going to know what you're talking about."
"C'mon, Josephine, don't be such a wet blanket! I have to try, at least! I gotta know!"
"Half of that was probably gibberish."
"But we don't KNOW that!"
"Uuuugh. Sarah, sometimes you're just plain crazy."
The two sisters entered McMechos, greeted by its' garish oranges and browns. "Y'know," Josephine mused, "I heard these restaurants use orange because it makes you hungry, so you'll order more. Pretty sinister stuff."
"Well, I'm starved, so it must be working! How about you?"
"This is why I ate before we left. I'm glad I got Morgana to email me those recipes. They're not quite as good as her stuff, but it's close enough."