Slam Jammin Japan asked Chatzy to choose between has and has. Chatzy chose: has
Slam Jammin Japan asked Chatzy to choose between no and no. Chatzy chose: no
Slam Jammin Japan: choose style, style
Slam Jammin Japan: fuck
---
Del: i feel bad because i kept dunking on shantae for being a game for people who like midriffs
(later)
PhoneDel: The Shovel Knight ruse was a distaction
PhoneDel: I has the Shantae
---
Sora: i somehow want to go ice scating
Sora: ...
Sora: skating.
Nero Wolfe: gross
Gooper Blooper: I'M THE SCATMAN
---
Nero Wolfe: if I can't use it on my lap, NO ONE CAN
Gooper Blooper: "I'm mildly inconvenienced! TIME TO NUKE ALL MY DATA"
---
Sora: sarah
Sora: *holds up a white mage*
---
Phoebe Gunther: I remember back in like, third grade, teacher's would make us write stories where we had to use a certain amount of literary devices in them, and one of the ones on the list to select was onomatopoeia. So, naturally, every story began with "BEEP BEEP BEEP" "My alarm clock woke me up in the morning..."
Ice Cold: BEEEP
Phoebe Gunther: I believe it was even a recommendation from her to start a story with an onomatopoeia if you were going to use one
Ice Cold: the hardest part is starting the damn thing
Phoebe Gunther: because what better hook than a noise?
Ice Cold: yep
Phoebe Gunther: I GOTTA KNOW WHAT THAT NOISE IS
HAIRY WORLD!: OOF! I broke my butt
Ice Cold: um
HAIRY WORLD!: VROP! Sine does a thing
HAIRY WORLD!: SBLOUNSKCHED! It's shaped like pants
HAIRY WORLD!: So many onomotos
Phoebe Gunther: BARF!
Phoebe Gunther: is by far the best one
Ice Cold: i thought vomit was pretty good- wait.
M Sheep: What on earth have I come back to
Ice Cold: idk
---
RubyChao: wow, they stopped using the emoticon shortcuts
Ice Cold: not sure how you'd find those out through tumblr of all things
Phoebe Gunther: but
RubyChao: š and now they've got this type instead
Phoebe Gunther: our kissies?
RubyChao: that face is kind of unsettling
RubyChao: i guess that was the chatzy update from a couple days ago, then!
M Sheep: That is a little off isn't it
ivel: š©
Ice Cold: the teeth
Ice Cold: oh god the teeth
Phoebe Gunther: š° thank goodness I can send an emoji of a Japanese beginner driver
GB, Legendary Hunter: šS M A S H T H A T M O T H E R F U C K I N L I K E B U T T O Nš
Ice Cold: wow.
Ice Cold: i died
ivel: š NOTHING BEATS A JELLY FILLED DONUT
Ice Cold: i can't fucking
Ice Cold: fuck you ivel
Ice Cold: i'm never buying you chicken anymore
M Sheep: donuts and frothy glasses of water
M Sheep: my favorite
Ice Cold: you're gonna get those donuts and you're gonna LIKE THEM
ivel: oh god those too
Ice Cold: wait
Ice Cold: frothy glasses of water?
Phoebe Gunther: eat your hamburgers, apollo
GB, Legendary Hunter: š¼šŗš¾š½šš®
Ice Cold: DON'T COPY THAT FLOPPY
ivel: GEE I WONDER WHO THOSE COULD BE REFERENCING
M Sheep: The Sarahkin
M Sheep: obviously
ivel: yes
Draco: š
---
RubyChao: http://i.imgur.com/Ew69dB8.gif
Ice Cold: oh my god
Ice Cold: mom are you okay
Draco: This is what Shimmer fears parenthood is like.
ivel: she's right
M Sheep: That image made me laugh far too much
Draco: Yeesh, watching her fill up that tray reminds me of the horse show I went to and they flooded part of the stage for the finale.
Phoebe Gunther: Shimmer knows what parenthood is really like, she has a great role model! You raise your kids for a while, then you leave them to make death machines for a dragon.
GB, Legendary Hunter: she did what she had to do
Draco: Draco only hires genuine orphans! How dare you insinuate those children had parents!
---
GB, Legendary Hunter: *retroactively adds Stick Stickly to Format Wars*
Ice Cold: isn't the money bundle basically stick stickly's cousin
---
Raven: Ama about brandon continues
iKomodo: Fave pizza toppings? :U
Raven: Meat lovers
ivel: same
Raven: Or as they say in england, "some meaty in my cheesy"
(later)
M Sheep: Another question for you
M Sheep: There is a runaway trolley barreling down the railway tracks.
M Sheep: Ahead, on the tracks, there are five people tied up and unable to move. The trolley is headed straight for them. You are standing some distance off in the train yard, next to a lever. If you pull this lever, the trolley will switch to a different set of tracks. However, you notice that there is one person on the side track. You have two options:
Ice Cold: i know the answer
M Sheep: You have two options: (1) Do nothing, and the trolley kills the five people on the main track. (2) Pull the lever, diverting the trolley onto the side track where it will kill one person.
M Sheep: What do you dooooo?
ivel: 3: SUPLEX THE TROLLEY
M Sheep: SABIN?!
Ice Cold: freeze the wheels, put up mounds of snow to break the momentum of the train before they reach anyone
Ice Cold: and prolly stop it
Ice Cold: i can't physics today
Spah: Nah Harps
Spah: Melt the five people on the main track
Spah: Then reform them
Spah: The people were snowmen
Ice Cold: he can only freeze. Brandon only has teh ice.
Ice Cold: sads.
RubyChao: MULTI-TRACK DRIFTING
James R. Herold: my favorite solution to this was one where a father used a kid's toys to set up this problem and posed it to his son
James R. Herold: the son looked at it, moved the one guy onto the same track as the other five... and then ran them all over
M Sheep: Another question
M Sheep: You have two trolley problems, A and B.
M Sheep: the levers A and B are quantum-entangled in such a way that B always assume the state opposite of A and vice versa
M Sheep: You are standing at lever a, which has not been pulled yet.
M Sheep: This implies that the lever B is in the pulled state, saving 5 people and killing 1 man.
James R. Herold: I choose to blow up the ferry with the convicts on it
Gooper Blooper: I select to defund the railway system
M Sheep: If you pull the lever, the trolley on your side will kill one man, but the trolley on side B will kill five.
Ice Cold: stop the trolley with your bare hands
RubyChao: i build a third track that has no people on it
M Sheep: However, you do not know where the trolley problem B is located. It might be on the other side of the Earth, or in another universe.
RubyChao: and the trolley goes down that track instead
M Sheep: You do not know the person at problem B
Gooper Blooper: get Wario-Man to stop the train
James R. Herold: I ask the hooligans to get off the track, you little scamps
M Sheep: the only thing you know for sure is that if you pull the lever, somewhere five people will die.
M Sheep tries to say "What do you dooo?", but is drowned out over alternate answers
RubyChao: host a class trial and make sure it's the culprit who's in the way of the trolly
James R. Herold: If there was a button you could press that would get rid of the trolley question, but it would kill one random person on Earth, would you press it
ivel: lel
Ice Cold: kill monobear for putting us through this shit
M Sheep: One more
M Sheep: There’s an out of control trolley speeding towards four workers.
M Sheep: You are on your way to teach an ethics class and this accident will make you extremely late.
ivel: the answer is to gather the Dragon Balls and wish for all trolleys on Earth to be teleported to Space Australia
Ice Cold: Brandon: now on Ask Me Anything: It's time for grimdark Trolley questions! The trolley was the phantom train all along? The answer may surprise you!.
M Sheep: You have the ability to pull a lever and change the trolley’s path so it hits just one person.
M Sheep: This will make you slightly less late to your class.
M Sheep: What do you doooo?
RubyChao: can i decide who the person is
RubyChao: because if so
RubyChao: i send the trolley barreling at the person giving me all these trolley problems
James R. Herold: there's a trolley and two set of tracks: one will go over the button that will kill one person but get rid of the trolley question, the other track has a dvd collection of The Amanda Show. Which will you choose?
Ice Cold: Brandon: Man, the phantom train must not get a lot of service these days.
M Sheep Choose A Person
Draco: The Phantom Train only has one passenger: Yamame
Ice Cold: i choose that sheep should probably continue to do the RP readingapalooza
Gooper Blooper: CHOOSE A GAME
Ice Cold: damn u goops
mheh: First, I find out if I work at the train yard or if I just enjoy loitering around train switches with the potential to kill people. I then call the cops and inform them about six jay-walkers on the tracks that could endanger themselves and shipments, in either extent. With my name cleared in case of anything happening, I let events take their natural course and hope that the corpses don't cause the train to skid and do even more damage.
Draco: Works for me.
mheh: Here's a slight switch to the train problem presented:
There's five people on the tracks, working there legitimately as construction repair crewman with signs and emergency lights, but an out of control alcoholic who has just been bereaved of his entire family by a crazed human-hating android's rampage is barreling down the tracks at enough speed to almost forget his pain and will almost certainly obliterate them if he hits, though that's not so much an intent as a foregone conclusion. You can save their lives by diverting it with your lever to a sideline instead, as in the main problem, but this time, -you- are the single person that will die if the five are to live.
What do you do?
M Sheep: I let the five men get hit in a selfish panic
M Sheep: Proceed to have a life destroying mental break down and grow some serious grieving stubble over the next five months
RubyChao: oh man
RubyChao: is this going where i think it is
M Sheep: Upon the sixth month, as I awaken under a torn stack of folded boxes in an alley for the second time, I set upon a plan
M Sheep: A growing obsession that devours the next year and four months of my life
James R. Herold: and that's when you start a peccary farm, right?
M Sheep: Upon the fifth month, amid stacks of unopened mail and opened boxes of take out, I boot up a robot I've built capable of traveling back to the future.
mheh: Totally thought he was going to hunt down Chaos the android that started this mess and shove a drunken train through its face, myself.
M Sheep: *back to the past
James R. Herold: samurai jack
Draco: We gotta go back, Marty! Back..TO THE FUTURE
M Sheep: I instruct it where to find the man that set off the terrible incident and send it back to set right what once went wrong
M Sheep: and I wait.
mheh: Together, M Sheep, Marty, and Samurai Jack go BACK TO THE PRESENT to fix the terrible tragedy. Off The Rails will be coming to you in theaters in June, 2017.
M Sheep: Off the rails is often the title given to my work
---
M Sheep: "Me?" the angel smiled warmly. "I'm your guardian angel, Molly. I'm here to watch over you."
M Sheep: Hmmmm
M Sheep: I'm not buying it
Draco: :)
Gooper Blooper: :)
Ice Cold: :)
RubyChao: :)
M Sheep: I've seen Adventure Time
M Sheep: I KNOW HOW THIS GOES
M Sheep: "Oho."
M Sheep: This Oho is either very important or I'm being crazy paranoid
---
RubyChao: my magnezone is level 83
RubyChao: is there such a thing as too much magnet power
Gooper Blooper: nope
---
Selma Molloy: "H-E-B Intense Cheese Flavored Cheese Balls"
Selma Molloy: hot dog I've been looking all over for cheese that tastes like cheese!
---
Draco: "Ghosts and goblins everywhere! Life's no fun without a good scare!"
Selma Molloy: im waiting for the internet to embrace the true king of spookiness
Selma Molloy: goblins
Selma Molloy: short green men with pointy ears
Selma Molloy: terrifying
RubyChao: AAAAAA! AAAAAAA! AAAAAA!
Draco: First, they conquered Blood Bowl. Now they're conquering....THE WORLD.
---
iKomodo: I have deduced
iKomodo: that Postman Pat's van is an ancient piece of shit that is on it's last legs
iKomodo: I know this because A) whenever he changes gear, you can hear the gearbox chewing itself to pieces
iKomodo: and B) the van leans to one side whenever he gets in and out of it, suggesting the suspension is either really soft or shot to hell
iKomodo: which is not what you want on country roads
iKomodo: C) in another episode, it suffers a breakdown and Pat has to fix it himself, which is apparently a regular occurrence
iKomodo: So it's not unreasonable to assume that one bad pothole later and you're looking at a broken axle or worse
Spy: Wow, yeah, that's a bad setup
Spy: Pat pls
Draco: What about Patman Post's van?
iKomodo: I think Patman must have swapped the engine in his for something out of an Italian supercar
iKomodo: and then not bothered to modify the van to compensate
iKomodo: so his brakes can't keep up, explaining his frequent crashes
iKomodo: although considering the turns on Greendale's roads, it must handle surprisingly well for a turbocharged van
Draco: SK should be on Top Gear.
---
Ice Cold: oh yeah i spent money on a soundtrack
Ice Cold: it is as beautiful as i remember
Ice Cold: i should put it on my iPhone.
Ice Cold: *forgets, forever*
---
Jumpropeman: GOBLINS?!
BDSM (m/21/Utah) entered for the first time
ivel: what
Spy: I imagine he walked in, saw GOBLINS?!, and realized he was in the wrong chatzy
Jumpropeman: or maybe
Jumpropeman: the right one ;)
RubyChao: well
Spy: Goblins in YOUR AREA. Click to see where
RubyChao: we have a new record for chatzy random blatant about their intentions
ivel: I noticed they had the watching vid icon thing
ivel: so who knows :U
Spy: Y'know
Spy: Do you ever wonder what happens if they find another 21 year old male BDSM enthusiast from Utah?
Spy: Does one of them switch name to brackets?
ivel: you can't have two people with the same name
ivel: so maybe :U
Gooper Blooper: I miss when we were unlisted
Jumpropeman: BDSM (m/22/Utah)
Spy: But JRM!
Spy: You can't lie on the internet!
ivel: 21.5
Draco: I blame Del.
RubyChao: don't blame del
Jumpropeman: m/252 months old/Utah
RubyChao: he didn't name this chatzy something that attracts both furry fans and casual chatters
RubyChao: everything is jrm's fault! :D
ivel: anyway, that's enough internet for me for tonight :U Good night peeps
Jumpropeman: damn skippy :I
RubyChao: dievel
RubyChao: i mean
Jumpropeman: night ivel
RubyChao: byevel
ivel: ;;
ivel dies
---
Gooper Blooper: JRM is a pillar of stability and reasoning in our little hermit town
---
Inspector Cramer: "Hey Dudes! What's better than a Dragon Party? A totally Bad Dragon Pizza Party! It's totally Dudical!
Bad Dragon Pizza Party is the culmination of almost 3 hours of work. But it’s totally awesome! What is better than Pizza and Dragons? Answer- Nothing."
Inspector Cramer: I think its just uno
RubyChao: do... do they know
---
RubyChao: >"...mor... ning. Good... morning."
RubyChao: i'm playing a completely different game
RubyChao: and it's worded differently
RubyChao: and this STILL just immediately gives me Bravely Default memories
---
Inspector Cramer: Pausing Phantom Menace at just the right time
RubyChao: va va voom
Draco: XD
Inspector Cramer: Darth Voluptuous
---
Draco: Still waiting for Sun Cat vs. Moon Cat.
---
(During the Nintendo Switch reveal conference, Nintendo waits as long as humanly possible to address what everyone cared about most - when is Zelda: Breath of the Wild releasing?)
Steck: Reggie asked Miyamoto asked the Zelda director asked the president of Nintendo and he said "wait a minute let me tell you something else"
Gooper Blooper: As SK would say
Gooper Blooper: "...stalling tactic..."
RubyChao: >no metroid
RubyChao: sadly, i'm not surprised at all
RubyChao: disappointed, yes, but not surprised
---
RubyChao: you know what i’ve always found kinda funny? the console naming. Ninty just goes all over the place with whatever fits, Microsoft does the XBox but with weird number choices... and then Sony is just Playstation 1, 2, 3, 4.
Gooper Blooper: I appreciate the Playstation for being a pillar of sanity in this mixed-up world
---
Ice Cold: ivel has good taste in men
---
Draco has Deceptiplot 5 just so Diadem can be kidnapped by evil robots and turned into a battleship.
Ice Cold: no
Draco: Thank goodness.
Ice Cold: i will have my super grimdark plots later
Ice Cold: with diadem
M Sheep: You're right, Harpy
M Sheep: We should experiment on Junko and turn her into a techno-organic ship instead
Ice Cold: Junko has suffered enough for our sins, Sheep
M Sheep: Has she though?
Ice Cold: yes
Jumpropeman: i feel like the Decepticons would suffer more for trying to have her on their team
Jumpropeman: you've seen how much she flummoxed Attwater
M Sheep: I think if you look deep, deep inside yourself, Harpy
M Sheep: you too will feel in your heart the hope of a despairing Junko
Draco: Deceptiplot 5: the light-hearted one where Quick Fix is alive again and tries to compete with Meh Burger.
---
M Sheep: "ALL WEAPONS SYSTEMS OFFLINE." "ALL of them?!"
M Sheep: That's a lot of weapons offline!
---
Shovel Goop: Finally I found a parody of this phenomenon and I laughed so hard
Jumpropeman: https://i.ytimg.com/vi/SkAd4XWwNos/0.jpg
Shovel Goop: TOTALLY MISSED THAT AT-AT
---
M Sheep: My entire roster for 2017 is recolors of Junko
M Sheep: Junclones
M Sheep: if you you will
Shovel Goop: Funko, Hunko, Sunko, Bunko and Nunko
M Sheep: The Junkin
---
Shovel Goop: Mean Bean Machine was my first puzzle game
Shovel Goop: And since it said "PUZZLE GAME" on the box in a special triangle label and I didn't know about Tetris and stuff I thought it was the first puzzle game ever
RubyChao: ha
Shovel Goop: my video game knowledge was very limited as a child
---
Cornwind Evil: If Praline and Raspberry and Appule enter Fite Club in Season 6. I have a Special Fite for them
Ice Cold: "season 6"
Ice Cold: "SEASON 6"
Cornwind Evil: Season 7
Shovel Goop: Protip: check the last digit of the current year to get that year's season
Shovel Goop: it's handy!
Cornwind Evil: 6 IS RIGHT NEXT TO 7 DARN IT
Cornwind Evil: TYPOS HAPPWN
Cornwind Evil: .....you saw NOTHING
Shovel Goop: yes they do
Cornwind Evil: But yes, those three, and if Appule wants to bring the rest of his friends he's free to
Ice Cold: the twpo never hadplen
---
Jumpropeman: "spoiler for Seinfeld"
Jumpropeman: another spoiler tag that just feels wrong for existing
---
Ice Cold changed name to Big Couscous
Big Couscous: time to make dumb jokes about brandon's initials
---
Big Couscous: reading RP is like eating chocolate chip cookie dough
---
Jumpropeman: im still waffling on my brawl roster
Jumpropeman: ethopoeia was destined for it before he got pushed aside
Gooper Blooper: I'm just hoping Jasper gets his shot
Jumpropeman: Jasper's locked in
RubyChao: that makes 2018 and 2019 that JRM has characters locked in for, then :V
Gooper Blooper: excellent
Jumpropeman: *Jasper gets replaced with Rose from the Golden Girls*
Gooper Blooper: jrm pls
Gooper Blooper: besides, if a golden girl was entering, it'd be sophia
Jumpropeman: Brawl Roster:
-Jasper
-Hurley
-Hurley
-Hurley
-Hurley
-Tree Spy
-Hurley
-Hurley
-Hurley in a bucket of fried chicken, Kasumi style
Gooper Blooper: NINE SPOTS CONFIRMED
RubyChao: why are we turning Kasumi into fried chik-
RubyChao: oh you meant Kisume
RubyChao: i deeply apologize for those two
Jumpropeman: I even put Kisume first
Jumpropeman: but I changed it because I mixed them up mentally
Gooper Blooper: Kesumia
---
Jumpropeman: Webdings vs. Wingdings
Jumpropeman: a more fierce fight than Alien Vs. Predator
Draco: More fierce than Sarah vs. Dietician
Draco: More fierce than Parsee vs. Chocolate Milk
Jumpropeman: that is a battle we all lose
---
Gooper Blooper: if anyone here DOESN'T see that bartender and think "josephine" clearly I haven't ruined head towels enough
Gooper Blooper: From a chatzy PM convo with chao:
Gooper Blooper: Gooper Blooper: also, Shovel Knight has a "butt mode" cheat code that goes through the script and replaces every instance of "shovel", "knight", "health", and "magic" with "butt", turning the story into the quest of Butt Butt to save Shield Butt
-RubyChao: does josephine play on that one and laugh uproariously at every piece of dialogue like she’s five years old
-Gooper Blooper: yes
---
ivel: NSFH (not safe for harps)
ivel: or more accurately, nsfhh (Not safe for Harps's heart)
iKomodo: D:
Bullshit Cracker changed name to BEFRIEND CLEFFA
---
Orrie Cather: "Five years after the defeat of the High Councilor, Batman and his insurgency attempt to piece society back together while struggling against the remnants of Superman's regime who seek to restore his rule. In addition, a shady new group, known as "The Society", emerges and threatens chaos around the world"
Orrie Cather: CORNWIIIIIIIIIIIIND!
BEFRIEND CLEFFA: society fucking ruined
ivel: effing lel
BEFRIEND CLEFFA: how could you
---
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