Draco is shamed.
---
SteelKomodo: how goes it?
Harpy: its all good, although once i woke up, the internet shat itself
SteelKomodo: it was all like "OH SHIT HARPY'S AWAKE AAAAAAH D:"
Harpy: i can think of two other times the system went down
Harpy: one was during class
Harpy: the other was when I went shopping at the bookstore
Harpy: the biggest problem is that the school net is interconnected, powering everything
Harpy: if it shits itself, everything is down
Harpy: even the registers and the testing centers
Draco: And the dinosaur electric fences.
Harpy: and there's no alternative TO it that's good enough
SteelKomodo: D:
Harpy: yeah we're fucked when dinosaurs invade when the net is down
SteelKomodo: damn it dinosaurs
Draco: Good thing Jurassic Park State has a good nursing program.
Harpy: they took away our nursing program due to funding iirc
Harpy: those dinosaurs get a better education than I do
SteelKomodo: god damn it dinosaurs
SteelKomodo: why do you get better education than us humans
---
RubyChao: frands
Tableter: Fronds
Harpy: frappes
---
Tableter: HE
Harpy: HAS
Tableter: NO
SteelKomodo: STYLE
Tableter: HE
SteelKomodo: HAS
Tableter: NO
RubyChao: GRACE
SteelKomodo: THIS
Harpy: KONG
Tableter: HAS
SteelKomodo: A
Harpy: FUNNY
Tableter: FACE
Tableter: We did it gang
SteelKomodo: yaaaaaay
Tableter: We won the internet
SteelKomodo: :D
RubyChao: go us
SteelKomodo: walnuts peanuts etc.
---
(VGCW is holding their annual Star Road competition, nicknamed Salt Road for the number of things that happen that fans don't want)
Gooper Blooper: lots of love for Ocelot
Gooper Blooper: he's facing Zubaz
Harpy: did i come back in time for salt
Gooper Blooper: lots of boos for Zubaz
Gooper Blooper: WELL I KNOW WHO'S WINNING
Cornwind Returns For Star Road: This is why I never pick favorites for Tournaments
Harpy: no ringabel? no justice
Gooper Blooper: ringabel not even making the field is a shame
RubyChao: he didn't get enough votes
RubyChao: i voted for him tho
Harpy: that's blasphemy
Harpy: good thing i'm RPing ringabel
Gooper Blooper: Ocelot doing surprisingly well
(Zubaz wins)
Cornwind Returns For Star Road: YOU WERE RIGHT GOOPS
Gooper Blooper: *salt intensifies*
Gooper Blooper: Spinebustero: THE SALT HAS JUST BEGUN
Cornwind Returns For Star Road: If the final is Asura vs Zubaz, Baz might as well just rename the tournament Salt Road and make it official.
(The final was indeed Asura vs Zubaz)
Gooper Blooper: Bazza87: I'M GETTING NERVOUS GUYS, HELP
Tnsmephiston: YOU CHOSE THIS, BAZZA
Nap1400: BAZZA CURSE IS REAL
Pompadourdiamond: BAZZA NERVOUS
Emp_viscants_drug_dealer: BAZZA YOU MIGHT WANT TO GET OUT OF HERE
RubyChao: bazza go root for the salty guys
RubyChao: invoke the curse
iKomodo: XD
Gooper Blooper: he tried that last year
Gooper Blooper: I remember he posted "L-let's go illidan..." during the semis or finals
RubyChao: okay then he better root for the others
RubyChao: maybe the anticurse will work :V
Harpy: exorcise the curse
Gooper Blooper: Thelazyblank: BAZZA COULD'VE HAD A 16-MAN JOHNNY CAGE TOURNAMENT FOR A SHOT AT THE VGCW CHAMPIONSHIP AND THERE WOULD BE SALT.
Rhonne: WE GOT OURSELVES A CLASS 10 SALTSTORM RIGHT HERE
Mosaiquex: MORTON'S STOCK IS SKYROCKETING RIGHT NOW
Kajshgfka: THIS IS HOW THE WORLD ENDS
---
iKomodo: "The platypus is mother nature's way of saying, 'I made this thing out of spare parts I found on the workshop floor, and it can still fucking cripple you.'"
Contrary: The platypus is the sign god is a drinker. :l Let's go ahead and make something that lays eggs, yah? But first we'll give it boobs and fur. And then poison claws. And it'll be aquatic and predatory, with, with a duck bill, man. .___. Yeaaah.
Contrary: No, wait. That's not drunk. That's being a deviant-artist. D:
Contrary: God is The Internet.
Contrary: D8
Gooper Blooper: "When the platypus was first encountered by Europeans in 1798, a pelt and sketch were sent back to Great Britain by Captain John Hunter, the second Governor of New South Wales.[4] British scientists' initial hunch was that the attributes were a hoax.[5] George Shaw, who produced the first description of the animal in the Naturalist's Miscellany in 1799, stated it was impossible not to entertain doubts as to its genuine nature, and Robert Knox believed it might have been produced by some Asian taxidermist.[5] It was thought that somebody had sewn a duck's beak onto the body of a beaver-like animal. Shaw even took a pair of scissors to the dried skin to check for stitches"
Gooper Blooper: my favorite platypus story
Gooper Blooper: "IT'S FAKE" *attacks with scissors* "...it's not fake."
Gooper Blooper: "...fuck"
iKomodo: XD
---
RubyChao: >reading a list of pairing prompts
RubyChao: "a mutual friend invited us to their laser tag party and we’re the last two alive on opposite teams and goddammit if I’m going down you’re going down with me"
RubyChao sideeyes Jonesybus
---
---
Gooper Blooper: I found this today: an improved version of the Pokemon favorite picker I linked last year
Gooper Blooper: my results, largely accurate
Gooper Blooper: I kept going after Leavanny and got, in order, Magnezone, Regirock, Octillery, Tyranitar, Cradily, Lilligant, and Parasect
Harpy: spot the commonality
Gooper Blooper: >top 10 is 70% fairy
Gooper Blooper: #harpy
Harpy: bitches don't know about my fairies
Harpy: mawile is completely goopy's fault
Harpy: and mawilite
Harpy: also its a fairy
Harpy: then i named it after Gluttony
Harpy: fucked
Bree: THIS IS REALLY HARD I LIKE SO MANY POGEYS
Gooper Blooper: don't worry
Gooper Blooper: the keffy family being so strongly represented in my list is your fault
Harpy: how could you not like keffy even before I was a thing
Harpy: not seen: pumpkydoo, florges, glameow
Gooper Blooper: I was ambivalent to the clefairy family in ye olden days (liked jigglypuff better) but over a very long period of time I slowly warmed up to them
Harpy: you were on the wrong side of the war, gooper
Harpy: truth: I liked both but prefered clefairy
Harpy: another truth: the thing about girls liking pink things is too true for me
Harpy: I'M GONNA GET A CAT AND DYE IT PINK AND
Ivel Knight: http://i.imgur.com/2oegVt1.png?1
Harpy: there is an extreme lack of fairies
Ivel Knight: honorable mention: Darkrai
Gooper Blooper: Ivel seems to like the badasses
Harpy: ivel you're not allowed to marry me without at least admitting that clefable is a badass
Harpy: or reshiram
Ivel Knight: Reshiram is badass
Harpy: or mawile
Gooper Blooper: keffy is as badass as they come
Harpy: things would be boring if we agreed on just about everything
Ivel Knight: Clefable sucks
Harpy: for example, he-
Harpy: YOU'RE DEAD TO ME
SteelKomodo: ivel no D:
Ivel Knight: ;;
---
Tableter: "Like you weren't trying to do the same. Oh, Lisa, show me your stoned ways! How many rabbits do you keep in your vagina? Fucking shit."
Tableter: WereJonesy
---
RockCandyGuy joined the chat
Gooper Blooper: hey dufe
RockCandyGuy: Hello folks, it seems like it's already been 1000 years!
Gooper Blooper: paper rock candy and the thousand-year chat
RockCandyGuy: I've burst forth from the Shadow Palace to totally rain on your surface world parade, and steal your princesses and the like
RockCandyGuy: No hard feelings eh?
SteelKomodo: XD
RockCandyGuy: Go get seven whatevers and meet me back here in 30 hours!
RockCandyGuy: I haven't been around much as I've been feverishly grinding the last couple awards on MH3U because my priorities are completely solid
RockCandyGuy: Who needs friends and loved ones? Not this guy
RockCandyGuy: Cold dead pixels are what I need
RockCandyGuy: *sobbing in the corner*
---
RockCandyGuy: As far as I know, Wendigo is a freaky abominable snow man guy
Gooper Blooper: RCG: Wendigo is a small living doll that was originally bootleg merchandise based on a minor character I used in last year's RP. He was brought to life by another doll and feeds off the life force of plants in order to continue to maintain enough life energy to exist.
Gooper Blooper: welcome to ZFRP, this is normal
---
Saberwulf: Can't wait to blow up half of Vegas over the course of a week
Saberwulf: "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU IDIOTS DO TO MY CASINO?!" "Got in the way, mate! ATTICAAAA"
SteelKomodo: wulf pls no D:
RubyChao: gonna try to get some food and hopefully not fall asleep in the process
Saberwulf: Nah all my exploding shit's gonna be in the desert
SteelKomodo: kk, good luck chao!
SteelKomodo: ah, phew
Saberwulf: Thank god the Nevada exists for my gaggle to utterly wreck each other
RockCandyGuy: Now to figure out where I can type it up and not miss any guidelines
Gooper Blooper: lots of long stretches of desert nothing broken up only by roads and gas stations
Gooper Blooper: We don't start till May 1 so there's no rush
Saberwulf: NEVADAAAA
Saberwulf: MOJAAAVVEEEE
Saberwulf: DESSEEERRTT
Saberwulf: I probably won't roll any of that out until mid to late year though
Saberwulf: Most of my stuff will be a slow build up to the clusterfuck of Vietnam war music and bible quotes that will be Kill Guill
Saberwulf: Also the dress makers
Gooper Blooper: Wulf I am absolutely calling it that in the barchives
Saberwulf: Perfect
---
RockCandyGuy: I want food but I don't want to leave the house for it
Gooper Blooper: fud
RockCandyGuy: Maybe I'll make som- WAIT A MINUTE THERE ARE EGG ROLLS IN THE FREEZER
RockCandyGuy: ITS FUCKING ON TONIGHT
---
Saberwulf: I don't even use grape spreadsa nymore thanks to all of my expseinve fig preserves
Saberwulf: Try fig preserves, it's great
Bree: "expseinve"
Bree: let's all have a moment of silence to appreciate this trainwreck of a typo
Harpy: ow
Saberwulf: My hands don't work with chiclet keyboards
Harpy: i hurt myself laughing when you said that
Saberwulf: I NEED DEPTH DAMMIT
Saberwulf: Never gonna buy a mechanical though because I need the ability to angrily slam the keys down so I CAN TYPE AT MAXIMUM SPEED
---
Something Awful joined the chat
Harpy: oh god an entire forum joined the chat
Harpy: GOONS EVERYWHERE
Gooper Blooper: *chatzy premium cost rises to ten dollars a day*
---
Draco: I dearly wish to have a Pathfinder char make it to Level 20 someday. I want to be able to summon five Celestial T-Rexes to crush my enemies.
Gooper Blooper: celestia t-rexes
Gooper Blooper: they wear mage hats and offer cookies
Gooper Blooper: and THEN they eat you
Bree Starlighter: they are also
---
Something Awful: Didn't start reading until second grade. : / They could never make me sit still long enough to pick up basic letters. Then came the medication and methylphenidate. : [ Inside of two weeks I was on 'Black Arrow' and "Le Morte D' Arthur". I was always a little ashamed of that, because it meant I was significantly more behind in context while being judged to have university-level skills. JRM, on the other hand, was always university.
Something Awful shakes fish sadly
Bree Starlighter: "shakes fish"
Bree Starlighter: best typo
Bree Starlighter: bitter old man Ven angrily flailing a salmon around
---
Saberwulf: This just in you can't read braille with your dick
Saberwulf: BIOLOGY
RubyChao: darn it
RubyChao: there goes Plan B
Harpy: you mean plan D
Harpy: oho
---
Gooper Blooper: I'm gonna take off
Harpy: NOOOO
Harpy: bye goops
Gooper Blooper: I wasn't really doing anything anyway :V
Harpy: YOU WERE BEING HERE AND THAT'S ENOUGH TO MAKE ME HAPPY
The Spy of Spies: Gooooops D: Veeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen D:
Harpy is sappy as all get-out
Gooper Blooper fills chat with an aura of goop
Harpy: that can be taken a very wrong way goops
RubyChao: spray ink everywhere
RubyChao: everywhere
Saberwulf: G O O P A U R A
---
Harpy: i am eating AWAKE chocolate
Harpy: and the last piece was supposed to help spell "AWAKE"
Harpy: but it just says
Harpy: "AW"
Harpy: I know how you feel, chocolate
Harpy: I know
SteelKomodo: :3
SteelKomodo: considerate chocolate
---
(SteelKomodo is playing Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts and Bolts)
SteelKomodo: SHUT UP BOTTLES YOU GUTLESS FUCK
SteelKomodo: (i don't mean it i love you bottles)
Del: hahaha
Del: sk admits his fondness for moles
SteelKomodo: Bottles is cool
SteelKomodo: but right now he won't shut up about sheep
---
RubyChao: i like how bravely default has completely ruined the concept of "gears and clockwork in sand" for me
RubyChao: because i see it and i'm just like "ancheim"
---
RubyChao: why did the dk rap suddenly revive
RubyChao: it's like out of nowhere HE HAS NO STYLE HE HAS NO GRACE just grabbed the internet hivemind
Tableter: Lanky kong got a following for smash 4
Tableter: And things went from there
---
RubyChao: "Think of it this way: if Russo was managing the local Pizza Hut, you'd order a pizza and they'd deliver a newspaper. Sure, it was a surprise, but it didn't make much sense, nor did you want to order from them again. But it sure fooled you, didn't it?"
---
RubyChao: "Here's the Zephyrus school for organizing surprises.
Step 1) Introduce a new brother, cousin, extended family member, friend, acquaintance, ex girlfriend, or similar.
Step 2) Give them enough screentime to establish them as somebody close to the character to be surprised.
Step 3) :murder:"
SteelKomodo: yep
SteelKomodo: that's how it went
RubyChao looks at Satori
RubyChao: if i subscribed to the zephyrus school
RubyChao: she'd be in hot water
RubyChao: (luckily for her, i don't :V)
---
RubyChao: >begin to gripe about chrome fucking shit up because why is every click opening a new tab
RubyChao: >look at keyboard
RubyChao: >ctrl key was stuck
RubyChao: Oh
Saberwulf: Pff
---
RubyChao: so guys
RubyChao: this season is about throwbacks, right?
RubyChao: are you ready for my plot where A CHARACTER HAS A NIGHTMARE OF EVERYONE IN THE BAR DYING
RubyChao: WHICH GIVES THEM AMNESIA
Draco: No.
Gooper Blooper: chao pls
RubyChao: Oh, okay then.
RubyChao removes the plot
Draco: I'm ready for the Tenshiplot when she wins the spelling bee.
Harpy: wins the spelling bree
RubyChao: >implying tenshi won't lose everything she enters
Draco: HAIL BREETANNIA
Draco: Tenshi will enter the Viola's Best Friend contest and lose to Jaxx.
RubyChao: "Sorry, Tenshi, but his pancakes at three in the morning are just too attractive."
Saberwulf: Jaxx, friend to all
Gooper Blooper: Viola probably occasionally orders Insomnia Cookies
Gooper Blooper: a major reason being they're open so late
Gooper Blooper: "fellow creatures of the night, I desire chocolate chip."
RubyChao: that makes me wonder
RubyChao: if tenshi and viola watched a movie
RubyChao: what would it be
Draco: Bluest hair goes to Lisa. Tankiest goes to an actual tank.
Gooper Blooper: Tenshi would probably want to watch something with lots of action, right
Gooper Blooper: Viola would go for horror or a spooky documentary
Gooper Blooper: ACTION HORROR
Draco: They end up watching Three Men and a Baby.
Harpy: Kevin wins the "has the cutest plush ever" contest... OH wait, nevermind, that goes to Sarah.
RubyChao: i like it
RubyChao: also i just had this mental image
RubyChao: Tenshi's trying and failing to say something dramatic/ominous
RubyChao: so she snaps her fingers
RubyChao: Viola appears from nowhere to purple prose all over whatever it is
Gooper Blooper: purple prose on command
Gooper Blooper: the perks of being viola's pal
Gooper Blooper: just pals, that's all they are
RubyChao: i can't wait until tenshi says word for word "it's not like I like you or anything"
RubyChao: maximum tsundere
Gooper Blooper: it's not like I want to be spoopy with you
Gooper Blooper: baka
---
RubyChao: back
Harpy: wb
Draco: Yay! :D
Saberwulf: wb
Draco: It's Ruby! Ruby!
RubyChao: the people, they love me
RubyChao awaits the leg-clinging
Draco: You never really know what he's gonna do next!
RubyChao stands there awkwardly as he realizes leg-clinging will not happen
Draco: He's Ruby! Ruby!
Draco: "Giggity giggity giggity giggity! Let's eat Chex!"
Draco clings to Ruby's leg.
Gooper Blooper comes in late, leg clings
RubyChao tries to walk
RubyChao: wow i never realized the trouble with leg clinging
RubyChao: oh well i'll keep doing it anyway :D
---
RubyChao: so who KOed viola
Draco: It was Claire.
Gooper Blooper: yeah it was probably clair
Harpy: Clareissa knows it all.
RubyChao: clair berates and humiliates viola
RubyChao: suddenly 200% mad tenshi
RubyChao:
---
Harpy: FUCK CLASS *sets school on fire*
---
The Spy of Spies: The boxarts are too perfectly aligned. This unnerves me
---
Saberwulf: Oh my god my friend's going ice skating on her lesbian valentine's date
Saberwulf: You can't physically get any cute than that
Harpy: wulf, yesssss
RubyChao: :3
Harpy: yes you can! *thinks of cuddles on the couch and on the bed and then... spaghetti dinner*
Saberwulf: I told her she better "accidentally" fall into her date's arms or I'm fighting her Monday
Saberwulf: Not even playing bruh I will square her ass up like a palahniuk novel if she doesn't cuteify that date
Harpy: i live a boring life
Harpy: my dates usually consist of watching TV, playing games, cuddling, and going to the mall.
RubyChao: my ideal date would be co-op vidya combined with lots of cuddling and possibly books
RubyChao: emphasis on cuddling
---
RubyChao: ...also i don't do well with jumpscares either
RubyChao: like something just popping out of nowhere to freak you out is augh
RubyChao: that's why i like horror manga and horror books more than movies, books and comics can't do that to you
Gooper Blooper: reach the end of a page in a book
Gooper Blooper: there's instructions
Gooper Blooper: "turn the page very quickly"
---
The Spy of Spies: CLEAN THIS, MOTHER FUCKER
RubyChao: AAAAAAAAAAAAA
RubyChao: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
RubyChao falls over and hides under his bed
Gooper Blooper: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Gooper Blooper hides under bed
The Spy of Spies: Don't ask how or why Isle Delfino became Mordor, the Blood Pianta works in mysterious ways
---
SteelKomodo: how many people have I told about my awesomest dream ever?
SteelKomodo: ...that ended on a cliffhanger, god damn it
Gooper Blooper: I don't think I've heard
SteelKomodo: okay, this is kind of a long one and a weird one, so bear with me
SteelKomodo: so I'm an adventurer type dude, and my adventuring party consists of me, Ash Ketchum and Goofy
SteelKomodo: ...I TOLD YOU IT WAS WEIRD :U
SteelKomodo: so anyway, we're on this ship bound for distant lands, and the captain of this ship happens to be a bug enthusiast
Harpy: amazing
SteelKomodo: so we're crammed in the ship's hold with loads of bugs, including a freaking ninja spider that does karate yells and everything
Gooper Blooper: off to a fantastic start
SteelKomodo: when we disembark, the ships' parrot comes with us for some reason, and we go into this dungeon
SteelKomodo: and we get to a well where we here shouting, so I grab a length of rope, tie it to a statue and jump down it
SteelKomodo: and at the bottom are these huge catacombs and this cute elf girl who's apparently been trapped down there for ages
SteelKomodo: then some giant bugs start crawling out of the tunnels (i'm talking centipedes the size of a train), looking for a fight
SteelKomodo: cut to the next scene, in which I'm suddenly dressed in dragonskin and complaining to the ship's parrot that fighting dragons is bullshit
SteelKomodo: I get back to camp and there's an argument - Ash wants to claim the credit for saving the elf girl... for some reason
Gooper Blooper: ash x elf OTP
SteelKomodo: Elf girl decks him in the face, snogs me and tells Goofy to shut up when he pipes up. I like this girl already
SteelKomodo: So we make camp for the night, and when we wake up we're attacked by...
SteelKomodo: brace yourselves
SteelKomodo: ...ninja beavers
Gooper Blooper: this should be your megaplot for 2015
SteelKomodo: we fight them off as we run to a convenient raft in a nearby river and jump on
SteelKomodo: only to realise too late it's headed for a waterfall...
SteelKomodo: and then fucking cliffhanger as the dream ends
SteelKomodo: also hahaha, I'd try Goops but I already got something :U
Gooper Blooper: buy the DLC to see the ending
Draco: Make camp or make out?
Gooper Blooper: both
RubyChao: watch, in fifty years
Draco: Oh my....
RubyChao: you'll finally dream the ending
RubyChao: and be like "SO THAT'S HOW IT WENT"
---
Harpy: unrelated, gonna spoiler: oh god ivel is conrad. or maybe i'm the conrad. because he keeps calling me a dork whenever i do something adorable. what do
Draco: Keep doing it.
Gooper Blooper: continue being adorkable
Harpy: goopy plz
---
Dacro: New rule: Dacro is a harpy.
Dacro screeches loudly and eats chocolate.
---
Gooper Blooper: new Character Musings up
Harpy: Silence is my fav char
Harpy: that isn't a sarahkin or widow maker
Harpy: Sophia and her are going to get along soooooo well
Gooper Blooper: lel
RubyChao: i like silence!
RubyChao: she's overshadowed by some other members of the GB Ensemble but she's still awesome
Gooper Blooper: of course chao likes silence
RubyChao: why do you say that
Gooper Blooper: when it's quiet, it's easier to read
RubyChao: PFFFFFFFT
RubyChao: goops that's terrible
RubyChao: you're terrible
Gooper Blooper: I knew giving her a name that was also a word would ruin the word
---
Bree: now I am alone with two sexy british men
Bree: oh my~
iKomodo: Nite
iKomodo: also hahaha :3
Bree: food devoured
Bree: time to write more boring things about my boring character
Del: why write boring things when you're alone with two sexy brits :U
Del: we could have boring conversations about boring characters :P
Bree: haha :P
---
Del: "why does T.J.'s arms glow if his cybernetics had been removed?" "Nanomachines, son."
---
Bree: sigh
Bree: I wish I had chocolate
Gooper Blooper: spoken like a true E4 member, bree
---
Gooper Blooper: So here's a thing
Gooper Blooper: back in 2012 I had an idea for a plot that fell through, and I had two MSPaints made for it
Gooper Blooper: I've been sitting on these pics ever since, and forgot to include them in my more recent cutting room floor blog posts, and I'm clearly never gonna actually do the plot at this point so I'll just post em here
RubyChao: ooh
Gooper Blooper: This is the plot JRM accidentally did an alternate version of, in which Celestia goes bad
Gooper Blooper: In my version, Tiamat (in the tiny, snake-with-six-heads form she showed up in at the end of Season 1 as a joke) would have managed to hijack Celestia and use her as a vessel
RubyChao: oh noooo
Gooper Blooper: Spoilered for gore: When Celestia would attempt to resist the mental control, Tiamat would have mentally forced her to cut off her own hand as a show of power
Bree: When Good Moms Go Bad
Gooper Blooper: This would have been the result
Draco: "Yes, BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA, the cookies are SUGAR-FREE!"
Gooper Blooper: Later she would have raided Pech's secret weapons stash and grafted that on as well
RubyChao: god dammit tiamat
Gooper Blooper: and then none of that happened and she just kept baking cookies instead
Bree: those images are terrifying on a level they have no right to be
Cornwind Evil: And you say I'M mean
Gooper Blooper: My cut ideas are always the meanest
---
Gooper Blooper: *checks harpackage tracking*
Gooper Blooper: one state away
RubyChao intensifies on Harpy's behalf
Bree: what did you buy her
Gooper Blooper: it's a secret
Draco: A Ferrari.
Gooper Blooper:
---
Gooper Blooper: hot springs
iKomodo: Pit pls
Draco: Toon Link's going to murder him. D:
---
iKomodo: not gonna lie
iKomodo: i'd kill to see The Asylum do Dinosaurs on a Train
RubyChao returns
RubyChao throws himself on SK's weapon of choice
RubyChao: now... you... have...
RubyChao dies
iKomodo: CHAO PLS
Gooper Blooper flings white mages at chao
---
Gooper Blooper: http://www.kayfabenews.com/15-adorable-puppy-photos-look-next-time-roman-reigns-grabs-microphone/
Harpy: #8 is oreo
Harpy: *ruins everything*
---
RubyChao crashes back through the roof, kicking nobody in the head despite his best efforts
Harpy: hi ruby
Harpy: again
RubyChao: hi harpy
Gooper Blooper: rubychao more like revolvingdoorchao
Harpy: woah, goops, rude
Draco is shredded by broken roof.
RubyChao is burned so hard he goes flying out the door again
Draco: That burn was so bad Ruby should wait a minute before trying to take another bite.
Bree: lel draco
Harpy: if you're eating pie once its right out the oven, i think you may need to wait
Bree: woot pie
Draco: Harpy knows everything about pie because she is a sweetie pie. =V
RubyChao crawls back into the chatzy
Gooper Blooper: celestia proceeds to tell a story where babby sarah tried to eat pie when it wasn't cool yet
Harpy: i'm not that sweet of a pie. In fact, I never had pie
Harpy: ever
Bree: you've... never had pie?
Draco: O_o
Gooper Blooper: *sends harpy pie*
iKomodo: Ouch
RubyChao: what
RubyChao: what
RubyChao: HARPY COME TO NEW YORK
Harpy: i wanted to try apple pie but never got a chance/got too scared to
RubyChao: I WILL FORCEFEED YOU PIE
Bree: harpy, pie is amazeballs
Harpy: i just wanna try apple pie and that's it
Bree: in the eternal cake vs. pie debate, I am a diehard pie fan
RubyChao: >not chocolate pie
Gooper Blooper: chocolate pie tho
RubyChao: >not chocolate pie
Bree: my favorite is pecan pie
Harpy: i didn't know a chocolate pie existed
RubyChao: it does
Bree: cherry pie also good
RubyChao: chocolate cream pie is the best thing ever
Bree: there's lots of kinds of pie
Harpy: i'm more of a brownie person tbh
RubyChao: i had some at thanksgiving this year and it didn't make it three days before i ate it all, 2good
Harpy: cake, too
Bree: but seriously man, I've had literally dozens of shitty store-bought cakes but never in my life have I had shitty pie
Harpy: that molten lava cake at the steakhouse was way too good for this world
Harpy: which is why i devoured it
Bree: store-bought pie still awesome
Draco: I swear to gosh, one of these days I'm just going to buy Harpy a cheesecake, a pie, and some other common dessert she hasn't tried and ban her from Chatzy until she has a piece of each. BU
RubyChao: do it draco
RubyChao: i'll help
Harpy: you can't ban me, you're not the administrator, and how will i relay my cute character ideas ever
Bree: no stop buying harpy sugar and start buying me sugar
RubyChao: we'll just have a community agreement to shun you
Gooper Blooper: sugar for everyone
RubyChao: until you eat the desserts
Bree: why does no one love me
RubyChao: i love you bree! but you already know the wonders of pie
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Gooper Blooper: JRM's status medals on backloggery are sad and funny at the same time
Gooper Blooper: he currently has two
Gooper Blooper: the first one is "500 or more unfinished games"
Ranka Wulfioka: holy shit
Gooper Blooper: the second one is "10 or more new games in a row"
Ranka Wulfioka: hahahaha
(later)
Jumpropeman: I'm working on it ; o ;
Jumpropeman: i recently beat Rocket Slime... which is a game i borrowed from my sister and isn't on my backloggery!
RubyChao: JRM PLS
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Del: hey bree
Del: his cocks
Del: i may have put a "his" in front
Del: i just intended to type cocks
Del: i am fucking stupid
Bree: cocks
Bree: dongs dicks wangs etc
Cornwind Evil: Roosters too
Bree: cock-a-doodle-doo motherfucker
Saberwulf: Oh speaking of, a lot of the cultures in Numenera are a lot more ancient in their beliefs and spirituality, so there's a bunch of that fertility stuff in them
Saberwulf: I bring this up because the Rayskel Cays has this big pillar that rises up out of the ocean and the book basically says "everyone in the cays says it's the EARTH'S DICK"
Saberwulf: I'm pretty sure they got the Morrowind dude to stop being blind drunk for a second and write half of this
Saberwulf: It's all about god dongs and metaphysicality
Del: hell yes
---
Saberwulf: So apparently in Egyptian mythology Set used a pick up line
Saberwulf: "How lovely your backside is! How broad your thighs!"
Cornwind Evil: The more things change....
SteelKomodo: ...Dirk is secretly Set?
Del: what a twist!
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RubyChao: is it true that josephine's butt
RubyChao: is the size of a very large butt
Gooper Blooper: yes
---
Harpy: new rule: if tryin' to work out something new and it stresses you out too much to put in one particular cool aspect, discard and play it simple
Harpy: also eat chocolate and have tea
Gooper Blooper: sounds like a plan
Harpy: sadly i'm out of chocolate (i eat russel stover bars in one go)
Harpy: but i do have tea
Gooper Blooper: >implying it's possible to not eat a russel stover bar in one go without making an effort of herculean proportions
Gooper Blooper: shit's only 2 ounces, down it goes
RubyChao: goops understands
Harpy: it is if you split it in half just for the purpose of making s'mores
Cornwind Evil was timed out
Harpy: CW couldn't handle this truth
---
RubyChao: maybe i should make my blog look more interesting than GENERIC WHITE BACKGROUND THAT CONSUMES YOUR SOUL
RubyChao: but :effort:
---
Saberwulf: Browsing OkCupid
Saberwulf: "Working on my magnum opus. And by that, I mean procrastinating by worldbuilding instead of actually writing."Saberwulf: She's perfect
Saberwulf: Oh christ she likes GiTS and House of Leaves
(later)
Saberwulf: "Status Seeing Someone"
Saberwulf: Fuck you OKC
---
Saberwulf: My new theme
Gooper Blooper: shrek is wulf, shrek is life
Harpy: the heck did i come back to
---
Harpy: SOMEONE TAKE ME HERE
---
RubyChao: >listening to a whole pile of 2hu music with weird names due to reasons
RubyChao: >one of them is called "sun"
RubyChao: i wonder what remix this could be
iKomodo: :u
Gooper Blooper: and then it's somehow a patchouli remix
Gooper Blooper: it was a mistranslation, the true title is "Never Gets Out In The Sun"
RubyChao: hahahahahaha
RubyChao: to be fair, look at what it does to her
Gooper Blooper: Then I thought of that thing where a bunch of inner thoughts are used as captions for a picture of someone being sad or uncomfortable
Gooper Blooper: "I wish I was back in my library" "why is it so hot" "why is it so bright" "I could go for a burger"
RubyChao: amazing, goops
---
Compcrash Ven McPseudowriter: Draco! Tell us a story!
Draco: A STORY?
Compcrash Ven McPseudowriter: YES
Compcrash Ven McPseudowriter: THAT THING
Draco: Once upon a time there was a giant space monster that hated all life, so it went to the nearest planet it could find. It was a little red planet a bunch of primates would later call Mars and the giant space monster decided "FUCK THAT" and spewed horrible lightning bolts on the current civilization.
Draco: The inhabitants were rather meaningless in the long run and could only send some kind of psychic signal to one of those primates, telling them to somehow protect themselves from the giant space monster 'cause he wrecked Mars and he was going to Earth next.
Draco: So the primate was all "Yo, we need to rally our own monsters to fight this dude." and so they got out the phone book and called Godzilla. Godzilla was busy playing golf with Rodan though, so all they got was a baby Mothra.
Draco: So the giant space monster - let's call him My Original Character Blidorah - landed on Earth and began to marvel at all the natural wonders around him. Everything was at peace, in harmony, and extremely flammable, so My Original Character Blidorah started spitting lightning everywhere out of his three FIVE heads.
Draco: Baby Mothra was rather annoyed at being booked for a match with My Client My Original Character Blidorah on his first day, but he was determined to not be an obvious jobber, so he started spitting silk everywhere. Real classy.
SteelKomodo: hahaha
Draco: So My Client My Original Character Blidorah got some silk on him and rolled all of his eyes. Earth sucked if this was the best they could offer in the way of Professional Sports Entertainment and decided to just beat the silk out of Baby Mothra. Baby Mothra was a very convincing punching bag though, so he got an extended contract.
Draco: At this point, Rodan showed up and began monologing about how awesome he was and how badly he was going to beat on My Client My Original Character Blidorah. He didn't actually have any arms or legs; just some wings and a short beak. He got his ass kicked by My Client My Original Character Blidorah too, but at least it looked like an actual fight. Just for good measure, he got some silk on him too.
Draco: Then Godzilla showed up. You could tell he was coming because his theme song started to play. Did you know he has a live orchestra follow him around just for moments like this?
Draco: My Client My Original Character Blidorah commented on the absurdity of having your own live background music at all time by incinerating the woodwings with lightning breath.
Draco: Woodwings is Klingon for woodwinds.
Draco: My Client My Original Character Blidorah then flew into the air and began raining electric death upon the immediate region, which was flashy and caused a lot of property damage, but Godzilla remembered to not stand under a tall tree and was okay.
Draco: Then the actual fight began! Godzilla and My Client My Original Character Blidorah began grappling and punching and suplexing and atomic elbowing and other wrestling terms Cornwind will fill in for me later since he's a WWE Scholar.
SteelKomodo: some story
Draco: There was so much monster blood spraying about it was like an RL Stein book. The Earth trembled as they fought and fought until finally we ran out of budget and had to wrap things up quickly.
Draco: Godzilla quickly slammed My Client My Original Character Blidorah onto some thumb tacks he'd strewn about the floor, causing My Client My Original Character Blidorah to decide that this planet was not worth his trouble and decided to go somewhere uninhabitable and desolate like New Jersey to terrorize instead.
Draco: THE END
Draco: Epilogue: Godzilla negotiated a new sneaker contract as a result and finally beat Charles Barkley at basketball.
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Tableter: ☐ style ☐ grace ☑ funny face
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