GB's 100 Games: 50-46

Poop jokes, tanooki tails, robot deathmatches and the best damn photography game ever await you as we return to GB's 100 Games!

Additionally, I think a much better spot to place Mario 64 and Sunshine would be somewhere around here, maybe a tad higher.

50: Castle Crashers
Genre: Beat-em-up
System: Xbox 360 (Xbox Live Arcade)
Developer: The Behemoth
Publisher: The Behemoth
Released: August 27, 2008

As you may have guessed from my Xbox collection apparently consisting of nothing but downloadable games, the Xbox 360 in my house is not actually mine. It belongs to my younger brother, who favors several genres I don't, like rhythm-action and FPS - genres that are easily found on the 360. Meanwhile, my favorite non-RPG genres - beat-em-ups, platformers and classic-style games - are comparatively rare, but are found in great supply on the downloadable Marketplace.

Castle Crashers was the first Xbox game both he and I played (He got the system in the mail before his ordered game arrived, so fortunately the Marketplace was there to save the day). I'd wanted to play CC since first reading about it before it ever released, and I was quite happy with it.

You can definitely tell Castle Crashers is a product of the guys responsible for the once-legendary Newgrounds - a lot of early-2000s-Flash-game humor and style is present here, and there are multiple cameos and nods to other Newgrounds properties - most prominently Alien Hominid.

As for the gameplay, it's a grand old time, especially with friends. You take your knight through a wide variety of levels, facing off against a couple dozen different types of enemies and plenty of bosses. The soundtrack is entirely from the Newgrounds Audio Portal and is excellent and professional-sounding, with some very memorable tunes. There's also a ton of characters to unlock, most of them enemies from the game, but unfortunately every character plays identically except for their magic attacks, so it's really not worth playing through the reasonably lengthy quest (longer than Scott Pilgrim) as everyone. Still definitely worth your time if you like beat-em-ups.

49: Pokemon Snap
Genre: Rail Shooter
System: Nintendo 64
Developer: HAL Laboratory
Publisher: Nintendo
Released: July 26, 1999

A POKEMON RAIL SHOOTER?! Well, it plays like one. You're merely taking pictures of them.

Pokemon Snap is an absolutely brilliant idea for a spinoff. It sounds ridiculous, and probably never would have left Japan if it hadn't starred the red-hot Pokemon (In fact, Snap did not begin development as a Pokemon game - thank goodness they made the change). It was 1999, and the entire planet was firmly in the grasp of Pokemania - I'm fairly sure that back then  you could have released a connect-the-dots game for the Super Nintendo and it would have been greenlit and marketed like mad if it was Pokemon-themed.

This was actually the first Pokemon game I ever played - before I had a Game Boy Color or a Nintendo 64, I got the chance to play Pokemon Snap at the house of one of my mother's friends. My experience with the series in general was still limited - we went there in the summer (I remember because they had an outdoor pool) and I didn't start getting into Pokemon until fall of that year (which I remember because of getting The Official Pokemon Handbook via a book order, which introduced me to every Pokemon at the time). It wasn't until a little later that I got totally obsessed with Pokemon like almost every other kid my age, but this was where it started.

Pokemon Snap is just crazy enough to work: Instead of fighting Pokemon, you photograph them in their natural environment, with Professor Oak grading your pictures. With only six short levels (plus a "final boss" stage featuring Mew), the emphasis is on replaying stages to improve your score and find all 63 Pokemon (Beta versions included Ekans, but his omission leaves us one short of the magic number). The best scores are kept in the Pokemon Report. There's also a Pokemon Album where you can save your personal favorite pictures that aren't "good" enough to be in the Report, and a small "Gallery" that can display your four absolute favorite or highest-scoring shots. It can get pretty addictive, and I replayed it several years ago and discovered a couple new techniques involving careful orientation and good use of the various unlockable items to get higher scores than ever.

With far less popular Pokemon spinoffs getting sequels (like Pokemon Channel, a pseudo-sequel to Hey You Pikachu), it's baffling Nintendo has not revisited Pokemon Snap, especially considering their never-ending boners for awkward gimmicks like gyroscopes, motion controls and cameras.

48: Super Mario Brothers 3
Genre: Platformer
System: Game Boy Advance
Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Released: October 21, 2003

Wait, no, sorry. *ahem*

SUPER!

MARIO BROTHERS...

THA-REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Thank you, The Wizard.

Like Yoshi's Island, I didn't own Mario 3 until this GBA update came out. Unlike Yoshi's Island, though, I actually did get to briefly play the original a few times on visits to relatives' houses. As a result, despite not owning the game the classic World 1 map screen is still a minor source of nostalgia, especially the music and that marching Hammer Bro.

The GBA version made use of the mostly forgotten E-Reader peripheral to add bonus stages, items, and features. While a great idea, nobody had an E-Reader, so the feature was abandoned shortly after release. The USA didn't get all the E-Reader cards made, and Europe didn't get any of them at all. Since the 3DS has a similar feature built right into the hardware, I'd suggest they try this again. Instead of the picture-posing and database-unlocking offered by Pokedex 3D and Kid Icarus, why not do something more substantial with AR Cards?

47: Super Mario 3D Land
Genre: 3D Platformer
System: Nintendo 3DS
Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Released: November 13, 2011

I got 3D Land for Christmas in 2011, and didn't get far before growing bored with it. I returned to it nearly a year later and I'm not sure what I was doing wrong before, because this game is great!

Super Mario 3D Land is probably what people expected back in the mid-90s when they heard Nintendo was making a 3D Mario game, because unlike the very different 64, Sunshine, and Galaxy, 3D Land is actually a classic-style 2D Mario translated to the 3D plane. Stages are simple get-to-the-goal affairs, and several classic elements not seen in an age make their return, like the heavily-advertised Super Leaf as well as Super Mario 3 recurring boss Boom-Boom.

Sadly, while high quality 3D Land does little to advance the series. The story is the same "Peach got kidnapped lol" plot everyone is sick to death of, and the constant repetition of this same story makes Bowser seem less like a threat and more like a goddamn moron. The final "boss" is pretty cool though ("Boss" is in quotes because you never attack Bowser directly). Still, the gameplay is a first (a 2D Mario in 3D) so that's something.

46: Robot Wars: Arenas of Destruction
Genre: Vehicle Combat
System: PC
Developer: Climax Group
Publisher: BBC Multimedia
Released: November 22, 2001

Let's be frank - in terms of what critical reviewers look for, Arenas of Destruction has no place being ranked above all these Mario games. There are numerous graphical and gameplay problems and the package is far less polished. But that didn't stop me from having a lot of fun and spending a LOT of time with AoD.

In AoD you build your own robot (or purchase a pre-made one, including a few from the show) and go up against other robots in various competitions, usually deathmatches. I got a tremendous amount of replay value from making tons of different robots and trying to win with them. I should note that there is a big focus on flipping your opponent and avoiding being flipped yourself as very, very few robots can self-right and none are invertible. Also, among the real robots I suggest using Behemoth, who has a flipper just as useful as the also-playable Chaos 2 and also has a small spike at the back for a backup attack whereas if Chaos loses his flipper he's totally helpless.

The sequel, Extreme Destruction, makes mild improvements in some areas but has other severe issues with housebot AI and the judges' decisions that make it a much less enjoyable game.