This post is a database of all of my characters, items they've collected, locations I've added to the Zoofights RP-verse, and food and drink I've contributed to the bar. As the stylish gif above says, this page is Under Construction, and will be edited to stay up to date with new information from blog posts or RP. See the title of the post for the date it was last updated.
MAJOR CHARACTERS
Josephine Bouteille Debut: June 9, 2011 (white mage), May 24, 2012 (chemist)
Status: Active
Origin: Final Fantasy 1/Final Fantasy Tactics
Text Color: Brown
Species: Human
Height: 5 feet, 5 inches
Birthday: June 20 (Age: 23)
Alignment: Neutral Good
Likes: Her family, improving people's lives through medicine, money. Josephine shares Sarah's love of sweets, although it's much more reserved, if only out of necessity.
Dislikes: She's jealous of Sarah's metabolism.
Favorite Foods: Sweets (particularly low-calorie ones, thank you)
Extra Pictures: Full-body shot, Throwsephine
Formerly "White Mage 2". Sarah's older sister. The three sisters agreed to be more like Sarah by being less like Sarah - in other words, diversifying and giving themselves new names and jobs. Josephine is a Chemist, which makes her an expert at synthesizing and using potions and other helpful items. She carries a Mythril Gun and a Mythril Knife for protection and works at the local mall's Sharp-Dressed Sturge outlet.
Josephine's sweet tooth rivals that of Sarah, but she does not share Sarah's ability to eat whatever she wants with no consequences, and as such is frequently fighting temptation. Her success is often tied to the Tractor.
Ariel, eager to help Josephine get over her constant agonizing about food and dieting, has accompanied Josephine on a trip into space aboard the ZFS King of Beasts, which is in orbit above the medieval planet of Ardea.
Abilities
* Alchemy (Item creation. Josephine is basically Macguyver but with potions.)
* White Magic (Less potent than Sarah, Josephine never learned many of the strongest white magic spells such as Holy)
Weapons
* Mythril Gun (A fairly standard gun with no special features or frills.)
* Mythril Knife (A short, sharp knife. Nothing fancy about it, although the Mythril makes it very durable.)
* The Original (A rocket launcher. Purchased from Mann Co)
* Tribalman's Shiv (Now THIS is a knife. Purchased from Mann Co)
Possessions
* Bag (A large bag Josephine keeps around her waist that contains potions and ingredients.)
* Hottie's Hoodie (Purchased from Mann Co)
* Madame Dixie (Purchased from Mann Co)
* Monster Blood (Slime that makes you grow if you eat it. Amount grown varies by amount eaten and freshness of slime. Most was eaten by herself, Dirk, and Stag Beetle, but she still has a small amount left in the can.)
* Sintendo 65
* Wheel-A-Meal Plate (A diet aid that forces the user to chase down their food.)
Ariel SierraDebut: June 9, 2011 (white mage), July 4, 2012 (archer)
Status: Active
Origin: Final Fantasy 1/Final Fantasy Tactics
Text Color: Dark blue
Species: Human
Height: 5 feet, 0 inches
Birthday: April 29 (Age: 21)
Alignment: Lawful Good
Likes: Nature, animals, clean energy, fighting the establishment
Dislikes: Pollution, large corporations, climate change, the status quo
Extra Pictures: Attacking, Pumped as hell
Formerly "White Mage 4". One of Sarah's sisters, the only one younger and more immature than her. Ariel works at a nature preserve and is heavily dedicated to environmentalism. She has chosen to become an Archer, and sports a bow and arrow set as her weapon. She's most often found either working at the preserve, protesting outside polluting companies, or visiting family.
Ariel branched out a bit for her later campaign, "Rally For Reality", which took aim at the fashion industry's promotion of unrealistic and dangerous figures and the resulting devastating effects on many girls' body image, including that of her own sister Josephine. Ariel enlisted Jonesy and Sarah as models for the campaign due to their distinct, non-model appearances (Jonesy is rough, angular, and scarred, while Sarah is short, flat-chested, and pudgy). The campaign ended in success when the mall honored Josephine for her bravery defending the mall from a dragon attack by rolling out a new line of plus sizes devoted to her. Ariel was ecstatic, Josephine a bit less so.
Ariel has called her grassroots organization "World Progress Alliance". She and her friend Penny are co-leaders, and use the Internet, radio news, street protests, and word-of-mouth as their main methods of getting attention.
Ariel is currently engaged in a major campaign to protect the pristine planet of Ardea, despite Gloria's admonitions that she was supposed to relax on her vacation.
Abilities
* Archery (Ariel is a shockingly good shot with a bow and arrow.)
* White Magic (the weakest of the four sisters, Ariel doesn't know any top-level -aga spells, nor many of the most powerful spells like Holy or Float.)
Weapons
* Carmanor (A special birthday gift from Celestia. Carmanor is a scarily powerful crossbow that fires extremely fast arrow-like rods with pointed tips. The crossbow can charge the arrows with various magical abilities, including electrically-charged arrows that explode into homing lightning bolts on impact.
* Bow and arrows (The arrows are fairly strong, with Mythril-tipped heads)
Gloria EncartaDebut: June 9, 2011 (white mage), July 1, 2012 (summoner)
Status: Active
Origin: Final Fantasy 1/Final Fantasy Tactics
Text Color: Dark green
Species: Human
Height: 5 feet, 7 inches
Birthday: December 6 (Age: 25)
Alignment: Lawful Good
Likes: Books, her family, peace and quiet, research and learning
Dislikes: E-books, movies based on books, people who make fun of her summoner horn
Extra Pictures: Upper body shot
Formerly "White Mage 1". Sarah's oldest sister. She left white magedom to become a summoner, and works at the city's library as a bookkeeper. The tallest of Celestia's children and also the one who acts the most mature, tending to take charge in a situation when all four sisters are together. She first appeared at the Fite Club Open House, facing Oceanus in combat.
Due to her levelheadedness, powerful summon magic, combat experience, and maturity, Gloria has earned a reputation for herself among some bargoers as a badass. The frequent 20 and 21 tractor rolls she gets in combat certainly help.
Abilities
* Summon Magic (Creates a facsimile of a once-living creature. If Gloria kills a monster in battle, she will be able to summon it in the future.)
* White Magic (When the girls were growing up, Gloria was the strongest white mage, followed by Sarah, Josephine, and Ariel in that order. She is fairly capable and knows almost every white magic spell besides Holy.)
Weapons
* Aqua Trident (A shimmering blue trident that can cast water and ice magic. Received as a gift from Josephine, who obtained it from the weapons collection of a group of astronauts studying magic.)
* Wooden Staff (It doesn't look like much. Because it isn't.)
KauketDebut: December 7, 2012 (blog), May 3, 2013 (forum)
Origin: Cryptozoology
Text Color: Italics
Species: Flatwoods Monster
Height: 6 feet, 10 inches
Birthday: Unknown (Over 3000 years old)
Alignment: Neutral Good
An alien from another planet who has visited Earth twice before - once in ancient Egypt during its reign, and again in 1950s America. Short of funds, Kauket was able to travel by using a government program that trades vacations for knowledge - she must now create a research paper about Ardea. She has chosen to focus on the wildlife and environment of the planet for her report.
Kauket has little patience for Baltan and his hijinks, but she had no choice but to bring him along, as the government program uses a buddy system to save on fuel costs.
Abilities
* Mid-level mechanic ability and technological understanding
* Skilled driver
Weapons
* Gravity Gun (Kauket's weapon of choice. The gravity gun is capable of lifting 2000 pounds with relative ease, although lighter objects are less of a strain on the gun's rechargeable battery.)
Possessions
* Mandulis (Kauket's ship. It has been updated internally over the years in an attempt to remain relevant, but is still very old-school.)
Baltan SeijinDebut: December 7, 2012 (blog), May 3, 2013 (forum)
Origin: Ultraman
Text Color: Bold
Species: Baltan Seijin
Height: 6 feet, 8 inches
Birthday: July 17, 1966
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Likes: SPACE ADVENTURES, SPACE BATTLES, SPACE WARS, and SPACE EXPLORERS
Dislikes: Stuck-ups, wet blankets, grumps, and stick-in-the-muds
Close Friends: Kauket (???)
Baltan is an alien from a far-away planet. He arrived on the space station cruise liner the ZFS King of Beasts alongside Kauket, with the intention of sightseeing. Like Kauket, Baltan has to write a report on Ardea, but he has yet to even pick a subject. Baltan is loud, annoying, and rather dim-witted, but he generally means well.
Abilities
* Clone (Baltan can create up to three clones of himself simultaneously. The clones are mentally linked and vanish if struck reasonably hard.)
* Laser Claws (Baltan's claws can fire laser blasts and stun beams)
* Teleportation (Range of fifty feet, with a delay of several seconds between vanishing and reappearing)
ShroudDebut: May 7, 2013
Status: Active
Origin: Original
Text Color: Yellow
Species: Human
Height: 5 feet, 7 inches
Birthday: Unknown
Alignment: Neutral Good
Likes: Money, traveling, sightseeing
Dislikes: Shroud is irritated when people are not given a chance to excel. He detests slavemasters, thieves, and bandits who did not earn what they have.
Shroud is a traveling fortune-teller. He has been all over the planet of Ardea, having visited over 110 countries. He is an accomplished communicator, able to converse in 18 languages. Normally reluctant to talk, Shroud becomes more gregarious at the promise of gold. He tends to travel alone, but is open to joining adventuring parties if there is something that cannot be accomplished by a single person that needs to be done.
Weapons
* Dagger (a large knife, used in emergencies)
* Magic Staff (fails to activate unless held in a certain way. Requires spell crystals.)
* Spell Crystals (These crystals screw onto the end of Shroud's staff. Each commands a different element. Shroud currently possesses Fire and Ice crystals.)
Possessions
* Bag (A medium-sized tote Shroud keeps his things in)
* Crystal Ball (A mysterious orb of crystal that lights up with a soft purple glow)
* Decorative Pipe (A large hookah-like pipe. Shroud always smokes from it during fortune-telling sessions)
FORMER MAJOR CHARACTERS
Sarah TridenDebut: June 9, 2011 (first appearance), June 26, 2011 (named)
Status: Partially Active
Origin: Final Fantasy 1
Text Color: Black (sometimes uses light purple)
Species: Human
Height: 4 feet, 10 inches
Birthday: July 12 (Age: 22)
Alignment: Lawful Good
Likes: Sweets, helping people, Alexander Triden
Dislikes: Seeing her friends and family hurt, broccoli, energon
Favorite Foods: Waffles, pancakes, cake, ice cream, cookies, the Black Legend
Close Friends: Alex, Antoinette, Widow Maker, Kayle
Nicknames: Lollipop
Character Theme: Chocobo Racing - White Mage's Theme
Sarah is, at first glance, a fairly typical white mage – kind and helpful, willing to aid those in need, and very affectionate towards friends. She is short in stature and childlike in a number of respects. She also has a massive sweet tooth. But when the people she cares about are in danger, the gloves come off – Sarah will fight hard to keep her friends and family safe. She is Alexander Triden’s loving girlfriend.
Sarah came to Manhattan for her second year of Zoofights without Alex, and wound up wheelchair-bound after a nasty attack from Project 32. She has since fully recovered, although with Alex still MIA she got a tad melancholy. Reassurances from Pech and a timely use of the Protoss Crystal helped ease her worst fears,which were erased completely when Alex reappeared late in the summer.
Sarah is currently in Levia, living the life with Alex. She stays in close contact with her family through frequent communication on the Internet.
Abilities
* Hammer Skills
* Impossible Appetite (Can eat and drink far more than her size suggests. Has a shockingly high tolerance for sugar.)
* Light Warrior Abilities (Can cast water magic, enhanced swimming ability, can stay underwater for long periods, resistance to mind control)
* White Magic (Glossary of magic here)
Weapons
* Fire Flower (Gift from Sine Cosine. It has a limited charge and its remaining energy is low, so Sarah keeps it tucked away in case of an emergency, most frequently in a vase on her nightstand.)
* Mythril Hammer (Gift from Alex. Strong, durable, and lightweight)
* Thor's Hammer (Gift from Alex. Stronger, more durable, and grants Sarah the ability to cast Thunder spells. Much heavier and more unwieldy than the Mythril Hammer.)
* White Mage Hammer (Gift from Zephyrus and Oceanus. A mysterious hammer with markings that match Sarah's robe. What mysteries does it hold?)
Recurring/Important Possessions
* Airship (Used to travel long distances. Sarah uses it to travel between Manhattan and Levia. Blessed by Sarah and her sisters to offer some protection from attacks.)
* Biguana action figure (Gift from Widow Maker)
* Crystal of Water (Considered just a good luck charm by Sarah until she found out about its magical properties.)
* Golden Locket (Gift from Alex. One of Sarah's most cherished possessions, she wears it almost always.)
* Ice Cream Machine (Gift from Erebus, Pech, and Antoinette. Can turn any food item into ice cream.)
* Lute (Sarah doesn't know very many songs on the lute, but she's pretty good at the few she can play.)
* Motorcycle (Sarah owned one last year, but it was lost during Race Yer Mates. She recently purchased a new electric motorbike.)
* Photo Albums (Three: Sarah's Early Years, Alex's Early Years, and the Saralex Album of Diabetes.)
* Potions (Sarah can brew potions at home. Potions include the healing Hi-Potion, the mana-restoring Ether, the agility-enhancing Speed Drink, and the stat-boosting potions Power Plus, Mind Plus, and Luck Plus.)
* Shutter Shades and Feather Boa (Won bet from Delmond Taggar)
* Sintendo 65 (With plenty of games)
* Straw Hat (Gift from Alex)
* Swimsuit (One-piece white suit with red trim at the openings)
* Tridenland (Manhattan theme park. Sarah, Alex, Celestia, and Widow Maker all share ownership. Celestia is the park manager and handles administrative duties most of the time, with the other three assisting when she is unavailable.)
* White Mage Robes (By far Sarah's most common outfit. Has a closet full of them.)
Lesser Possessions
* Aperture Science Gel (blue is repulsion for bouncing, orange is propulsion for sliding around. Gift from Wheatley.)
* Bunny Slippers (Gift from Wall)
* Cake Pop Maker (Gift from Pit)
* Chocolate Fountain (Gift from Heavy Weapons Guy. It's actually for Alex, but I have a hunch he'll share.)
* Crutches
* Dalokohs Bar (Gift from Heavy Weapons Guy. This chocolate bar never goes stale and regenerates within seconds of biting into it. As long as Sarah does not eat the whole thing at once and it doesn't get dirty/contaminated/melted, she has infinite chocolate.)
* Devout Costume (Gift from Meat Boy. Looks silly and is one size too small, but it's the thought that counts.)
* Fancy Dress (Worn for formal occasions.)
* Impersonate Yer Mates Tiara/Gown Set (Won for placing first in Impersonate Yer Mates)
* Mythril Bar (Gift from Draco, although Fergy picked it out!)
* Plushies (Mini-Sarah, Mini-Shelby, stuffed corgi)
* Protoss Crystal Necklace - Gift from Amanda. Think of someone while holding the crystal, and it will tell you if they are in good health or in trouble.
* Silver Tiara (Gift from Shuma Gorath, embedded with green gems)
* Sonic Cosmetic Devices (Gift from Delmond. Fancy machines that work using sonic waves. There are three - one for healthy skin, one for healthy hair, and a sonic blowdryer.)
* Tracksuit (An outfit for physical activity, complete with headband.)
* Trenchcoat (A classic noir-style detective outfit. Why'd Sarah buy this?)
* Wheelchair
* White Mage Dress (Gift from Jonesy. Basically a white mage robe combined with a standard dress. No hood.)
* Workout Machine (Gift from Jumpropeman. Strengthens the arms.)
Celestia CaniccoDebut: August 1, 2011
Status: Partially Active
Origin: Final Fantasy 1
Text Color: Purple
Species: Human
Height: 5 feet, 9 inches
Birthday: December 18 (Age: 42)
Alignment: Lawful Good
Likes: Tinkering with machinery, improving people's lives with good food and cool inventions
Dislikes: When the blasted whatsit won't just hook up with the thingamajigger like it's supposed to
Favorite Foods: Likes to try a little of everything
Close Friends: Zephyrus, Pit
Nicknames: Purple Hair, Honeypants
Character Theme: Chocobo Racing - Black Mage's Theme
Extra Pictures: Full-body shot, Prosthetic
Celestia is the devoted mother of four white mages, the third-oldest being Sarah. With hard times falling upon her family years ago, she was forced into working for the Fiend of Wind, Tiamat, to help her family make ends meet. Last year, she broke away from Tiamat and reunited with her family after being away for ten long years.
Celestia is a brilliant mechanic and chef, able to do wonders with junkyard scrap and cheap ingredients thanks to years of supporting four children in poverty. Her self-adopted last name comes from "Meccanico", the Italian word for mechanic. She lives in Manhattan, housesitting for Sarah and managing Tridenland when she's not home.
Abilities
* Advanced Cooking Ability
* Advanced Mechanic Ability
* Black Magic (Glossary of magic here)
Weapons
* Death Machine (AKA WarMech Leader. An oversized pilotable WarMech that boasts a freeze cannon, flamethrower, missile launcher, laser, machine gun, and jetpack. Armor is sturdier than WarMechs, but it can't regenerate.)
* Goliath Walker (Gift from Delmond. The Goliath is a piloted bipedal mech that features Hellfire scatter missiles and smoothbore autocannons that fire explosive shells.)
* Laspistol (Acquired from Pech's weapons cache. Shoots medium-strength laser bursts.)
* Mechadon (A large remote control robot. Can give a good stabbing with its six pointed legs. While it has no AI, Skeiron is convinced it's a thinking sentient robot like himself.)
* Metal Blade Slicer (A sawblade on a rod. Hold down the trigger to make the saw spin. Works as a cutting tool or a nasty melee weapon.)
* Piece of Eden (Gift from David. A magical orb that can create ghostly blades and make illusory copies of the holder.)
* Steam Prosthetic (A transforming mechanical arm created by Dr. Bulgrave to replace Celestia's lost left arm. In normal mode, it's a pretty normal prosthetic, but in battle mode it features a hollowed-out mythril mace and the ability to channel Celestia's magic to add elemental power to the mace's strikes. The arm is made mostly out of mythril that has been painted brown and copper to look like Bulgrave's trademark works while retaining the light weight and durability of mythril.)
* Wooden Staff (A seemingly ordinary staff that has been magically treated to resist elemental damage. Celestia can cast magic without the staff, but it's stronger and better-focused when she uses it.)
Recurring/Important Possessions
* Magitek Stove (Built using blueprints given to Celestia by Zephyrus. It has become Celestia's favorite method of cooking and baking.)
* Minibot Manufacturing Plant (Gift from David. A box slightly smaller than a shoebox that creates minibots, which are able to gather materials to create more of themselves. Useful for odd jobs.)
* Skeiron Call (A remote control that can contact Skeiron and assign him orders.)
* Toolbox (A toolbox shaped like a classic RPG-style treasure chest. Contains numerous tools and gadgets to help Celestia repair and enhance all things mechanical.
* Underground Laboratory (Located next door to the King of Beasts bar, hidden behind a secret door in an alley. Celestia spends a lot of time here working on machinery. Skeiron is occasionally assigned to guard the alley.
Lesser Possessions
* Apron (Gift from Wall. A matronly apron reminiscent of the stereotypical kindly middle-aged woman with a pie.)
* Cooking With Magitek (Gift from Zephyrus. A cookbook on how to combine magic with food preparation.)
* Elemental Statue (Gift from Hope Ravensky. A raindrop-shaped statue colored blue, red, and yellow to represent fire, thunder, and ice.)
* Fancy Dress (A glittery purple dress worn for formal occasions.)
* Holographic Portrait (Gift from Jaxx Tantra. Displays Celestia and her daughters, plus Alex and Skeiron, in a family photo.)
* Jewelry Set (Gift from Dirk. A necklace with a blue gem, and a matching set of earrings. Good for formal occasions.)
* Magic Tomes (Gift from Zephyrus. One book contains Aero, the other Quake.)
* Mammoth (Won bet from Zephyrus. A walking remote-control robot that inspired Celestia to create Mechadon.)
* Millennium Star (Gift from Jaxx. This precious gem is 203 carats.)
* Portrait of David (Gift from David. Wink.)
* Theta Mirror (Gift from Jaxx. A mirror made from the wreckage of the Chernihiv Theta massacre. Imbued with infinity.)
Widow MakerDebut: August 15, 2010
Status: Active
Origin: Original
Text Color: Black in 2011, green in 2012
Species: Genetically enhanced praying mantis
Height: 8 feet, 0 inches (body length 9 feet)
Birthday: October 17 (Age: 2)
Alignment: Chaotic Good
Likes: Zoofights, old-school video gaming, people getting what they deserve
Dislikes: Losing bets, smug villains that never shut up, people saying "What could possibly go wrong?", Dr. Bulgrave
Favorite Foods: Red meat, live arthropods (especially males)
Close Friends: RED Spy, Sarah, Lady Purnima, The Swarm
Nicknames: Widow, Womantis
Extra Pictures: Widow Colossus, Baby Form, Eloher, Mecha Widow Maker
Widow Maker is a Zoofighter from another dimension, brought to the Zoofights one during Zoofights 5 by Gamma Constrictor. She escaped the life of arena fighting to spectate, bet, and vote on fights instead. With an antenna for danger and a huge cache of weapons and items, Widow Maker makes up for her average offense and poor defense with a formidable suite of equipment and a good head on her shoulders. She also has a close connection to her god Elohim...
Abilities
* Advanced Reflexes
* Baby Form (1 foot high, no flight, must win bets and fights to restore her adult form)
* Cloaking Device
* Dangerously Genre Savvy
* Flight
* Respawn ability (comes back in Baby Form)
Weapons
* Aluminum Shield (Used as both a weapon and a shield. Can deflect weak attacks and repel pistol shots.)
* Big Earner (Won in a bet from Red Spy. It's Spy's old knife.)
* Colt Revolver (From the Widow Maker Surgineering Fund)
* Flamethrower Cannon (Purchased from David Wulf. Slides over a claw and shoots bursts of fire.)
* Lawn Moa brand weed clippers
* Nail Gun (Birthday present from Jumpropeman. Frequently kept alongside the Big Earner as a hidden emergency weapon.)
* Phantom Thrust (Formerly Widow Maker's iconic spear weapon, now upgraded courtesy of RED Team's upgrade machine into a titanium drill.)
* Robotic Claw (Received during surgineering upgrade. Can be attached to the body and grab things.)
* Stun Baton (Widow Maker's weapon of choice when in Baby Form.)
* Widow Cannon (Gift from Jumpropeman. Shoots robot black widows that inject black widow venom)
* Widow Gun (A pistol that creates and shoots living black widows. Runs on batteries.)
* ZF-1 (A super-powerful multi-function gun designed by Sine and refined by Celestia. Functions: 1) Bullets that home in after the first shot using Replay 2) Single-shot rocket 3) Poison darts 4) Single-shot net launcher 5) Flamethrower 6) Ice spray)
Recurring/Important Possessions
* Commodore 64 (Old computer used for gaming and research.)
* Golden Game Brute (Widow Maker's favorite gaming system. Recently, the internals were upgraded by Celestia to be a Game Brute Color.)
* Heating Pack (Gift from Celestia. Worn under Widow Maker's wings in cold areas.)
* HNLMS Walrus Submarine (Won bet from Jumpropeman. Equipped with rockets and torpedoes.)
* Lifetime Supply of Grasshoppers from Insects R Us (Gift from David)
* Ninja Dress (Gift from Lady Purnima. Enhances Widow Maker's agility and features six pockets.)
* Red Hat (Gift from Sine Cosine. "It's just a hat. To wear with a scarf. When it's cold out.")
* Red Scarf (Gift from Sine Cosine. "It's just a scarf. You can wear it if you're cold.")
* Supermarine Walrus (Won bet from Jumpropeman. Widow Maker's vehicle of choice.)
* Windows 98 PC (Has a number of 80s and 90s computer games on it. The home of Clippy.)
* Winter Home (Widow Maker owns a small shack in the middle of the Florida Everglades, where she enjoys peace and quiet during the off-season and avoids winter's chill.)
* X Remote (Calls the X Demolition Company.)
Lesser Possessions
* A Bison Dollar (From the Widow Maker Surgineering Fund)
* Achilles Eel's helmet
* Alternate Timeline Recording (Gift from Sine Cosine. Depicts an alternate Widow Maker staying in the alternate universe Zoofights tournament - but she wins the whole thing, and then breaks free from her surgineers.)
* Blue Beetle 4 (A comic book from the Widow Maker Surgineering Fund)
* Cash Cow’s purse
* Delorean Toy
* Faberge Bell (Possibly worth a Gorillion, kept safe in an undisclosed location)
* Freddy Krueger Power Glove (Won bet from Sine)
* Game Brute carrying case (Gift from Sine)
* Godzilla 1985 VHS tape
* Keys (to Ironichide’s Jaguar, which no longer exists. From the Widow Maker Surgineering Fund)
* Hawaiian Lei (Gift from Jumpropeman)
* Mama Hanz's Deustchhoney (1 jar, possibly poisoned, from the Widow Maker Surgineering Fund)
* Murducken Kitchen Brutalizer (From the Widow Maker Surgineering Fund)
* Mustache Comb (Gift from Wall)
* Peetle set (Won bet from Sheep)
* Plush Robotic Operating Buddy
* Ramones T-Shirt (Signed, from the Widow Maker Surgineering Fund)
* Rosary (Gift from David)
* Sintendo Entertainment System
* Sunglasses
* Velcro Hi-Tops (From the Widow Maker Surgineering Fund)
* WWF action figures
SECONDARY CHARACTERS
The Great Conehead Brigade Status: Active
Origin: Castle Crashers
Text Color:None
Species: Human (?)
Height: 4 feet, 11 inches
Birthday: Unknown (Age unknown)
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Likes: Loot, drinks, babes
Dislikes: Party crashers, straight edgers
The Great Conehead Brigade is a team of three short, squat knights who serve an unknown higher authority. Their mission appears to be to find and retrieve "top quality girls". Details remain scarce on what constitutes a top quality girl.
The Coneheads are decently competent in battle and their armor is of high quality, but they are not very intelligent and tend to bicker amongst themselves.
Weapons
Conehead Armor - They claim their armor is "top quality", and it actually is surprisingly strong. The spiked helmet allows for devastating headbutts.
Glowing Swords - Each Conehead wields a sword treated with a special chemical that makes it glow. This is useful for exploring dark areas such as caves.
SherylDebut: May 1, 2013
Status: Active
Origin: Star Wars
Text Color: Pink
Species: WA-7 service droid
Height: 6 feet, 0 inches
Birthday: Unknown (Age unknown)
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Likes: Serving quality food, southern hospitality
Dislikes: Messy diners, dine-n-dashers
Sheryl is a WA-7 droid working as a waitress on board the ZFS King of Beasts. She fulfills the 'Gezora role' of an omnipresent lesser character that is less of an adventurer and more of a general utility character.
Abilities
* Encyclopedic knowledge of food and drink
Skeiron (AKA WarMech-3)Debut: August 3, 2011
Status: Inactive
Origin: Final Fantasy 1
Text Color: Gray and ALL CAPS
Species: WarMech
Height: 5 feet, 6 inches
Birthday: Unknown (Age: Approximately 8 or 9)
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Likes: Telling jokes, proving his worth in combat, roller skating
Dislikes: Feeling useless or helpless
Favorite Foods: Skeiron cannot eat, but he has a strange fixation on bread.
Close Friends: Zephyrus
Nicknames: Skei
Battle Theme: Final Fantasy 4 - Battle 2
Extra Pictures: ED-209 body
Skeiron was once WarMech-3, a nameless soldier in Tiamat’s army. Built by Celestia under orders from Tiamat, Skeiron was one of several dozen WarMechs. On the way to Manhattan to fight the Light Warriors, WarMech-3 gained sentience. Deciding that obeying Tiamat was not the right thing to do, WarMech-3 played an important role in the inevitable fight, helping to convince Celestia to change sides. Now, Skeiron is a goofy, bizarre, and strangely innocent character who is still learning many of the intricacies of the world.
Skeiron can get very jealous or protective of people, as shown by his willingness to jump into dangerous situations to help Zephyrus and other friends and his rivalry with Artemis.
Abilities
* AI Transfer (Celestia can implant Skeiron's consciousness into other robot bodies)
* Flight
* Humor Module (A limited personality expansion program. Skeiron is only capable of ending his jokes with one punchline - "Because the pilot was a loaf of bread". He is able to modify the punchline slightly, and can tell unrelated jokes if a huge amount of effort is exerted.)
* Regenerator Core (Allows healing factor.)
* Scan Mode (In his initial build, Scan Mode was a bluff and did not do anything. After being upgraded, Scan Mode now allows Skeiron to examine targets in close detail and find out more information about them.)
Weapons
* Armor Upgrade (Gift from Delmond. Based on the plating of the Ultralisk, these hardened carapace plates increase Skeiron’s resilience, although they cannot be regenerated.)
* Brain Storm Body (2012's Halloween costume, also usable for battle. Can create an electrical field.)
* ED-209 Body (2011's Halloween costume, also usable for battle Is bigger and stronger than Skeiron's normal body, but it's slower, can't fly, and can't regenerate. Great for brute force and street patrolling, though.)
* Kinetic Orb Launcher (Gift from Sine. A replica of her own launcher attached to a robotic tendril.)
* Mechanical Crab Claw (Gift from Jumpropeman. Similar to Zephyrus' claw, but without any weapons. Attaches to Skeiron's main body.)
* Onboard Laser Gun
* Onboard Machine Gun
* Toaster Launcher
Recurring/Important Possessions
* Arms (Gift from Zephyrus. Simple three-fingered arms that look similar to a crane game claw. They are removable.)
* Top Hat and Tie
Lesser Possessions
* Loaf Of Bread Squeaky Toy (Gift from Jumpropeman)
* Loaf of Bread Sticker (Gift from Jumpropeman)
Mecha-SarahDebut: November 5, 2012
Status: Inactive
Origin: Based off the white mage design of Final Fantasy Tactics
Text Color: Bright red and ALL-CAPS
Species: Robot
Height: 4 feet, 10 inches
Birthday: November 4, 2012 (Age: 0)
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Likes: What Sarah likes
Dislikes: What Sarah dislikes
Favorite Foods: What Sarah eats
Mecha-Sarah was created to act as a distraction against Garland. With that out of the way, Celestia's got another robot she doesn't know what to do with, and it's rapidly learning. This is Celestia's first attempt at intentionally creating a robot with advanced learning ability.
Abilities
* Advanced Mimicry (Like a parrot)
* Barrier (Based on the Protect spell)
* Flight (Armor is treated with a Float potion)
Weapons
* Onboard Laser Eyes
* Onboard Rocket Fingers
* Plasma Staff (Charged with holy power)
Debut: March 22, 2012 (blog), May 16, 2012 (forum)
Status: Inactive
Origin: Original
Text Color: Olive
Species: Human
Height: Five feet, 10 inches
Birthday: Unknown (Age: 39)
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Likes: Creating life from a strand of DNA, creating Zoofights champions, dapper hats, clockwork
Dislikes: New technology that is forcing steam power into irrelevance, that unsufferable buffoon Barnaby
Close Friends: Dr. Welward
Nicknames: Doc, Dr. Bullshit
Character Theme (Villain): Final Fantasy 4 - Dancing Calcobrena
Character Theme (Hero): Abney Park - Steampunk Revolution
Extra Pictures: Partial mask
Dr. Bulgrave is a Zoofights surgineer from Widow Maker's home universe. He had gone slightly mad in trying to recapture her and study her brain to further his studies. However, he was stopped by a horde of kobbers, and when Zephyrus saw the doctor realize the error of his ways, he was allowed to live, instead being sent to prison. He emerged a changed man, resolving to abandon his animal tinkering and focus on the fields of medicine and machinery instead. He has managed to become, if not a complete ally of the bar, at least trusted and tolerated by some of the more prominent members. Most importantly, he has managed to stem Widow Maker's extreme hatred and distrust of him somewhat.
Dr. Bulgrave now spends his time trying to overcome the speciesism he has held all his life. He's also attempting to locate a certain biker...
Abilities
* Advanced Surgineering Skill (The man can do wonders with a pile of pipes and cogs and a bucket of animal parts.)
* Genre Savviness (Not quite to Widow Maker's extent, but Bulgrave has studied the bar through newspapers and magazines from the past year, and knows how they operate.)
Possessions
* Caetus Vastitatem (A 200-foot airship shaped like a carnivorous fish. Equipped with lots of guns, a moving jaw, and a mouth cannon.)
* Dapper Top Hat (Don't leave the Victorian Era without it!)
* Denarium Quadrantem (A motor-powered pennyfarthing)
* Life Support System (Although he can breathe without it, his lungs and constitution are weak and he would easily tire and be left gasping.)
* Sifter (Fused to his life support. Much less sophisticated than Sine Cosine's design, this crude Steampunkian sifter is only two-way and can't go through time. This Sifter does, however, use tokens, and anything with a token implanted in it that is within range when he jumps will warp with him. He can also warp items separately, or make exceptions.)
* Surgineering Lab (Dr. Bulgrave works on his projects here.)
CX-1-DA300 (AKA "Browny")Debut: March 2, 2012 (blog), May 8, 2012 (forum)
Status: Inactive
Origin: Contra Hard Corps
Text Color: Dark gray
Species: Robot
Height: 3 feet, 10 inches
Birthday: Unknown (Age unknown)
Alignment: Lawful Good/Lawful Neutral
Likes: Upholding the law, keeping people safe, cleaning his weapons
Dislikes: The limited power of the police force in a city of madness
Favorite Foods: E-Cans and Energon Cubes
Close Friends: Samson, Theodore Rex, Zephyrus
Character Theme: Contra Hard Corps - The Hard Corps
Battle Theme: Contra Hard Corps - GTR Attack
Extra Pictures: After a hard day's work
This robot, previously called "Unit 1" in his debut appearance here on the blog, is built to protect the peace. Short so he can fit in small places and equipped with a strong array of weapons and equipment, Browny is the police force's most modern tool and their best hope at keeping civilians safe.
Browny is polite and professional most of the time, calling people "sir" if they outrank him and "citizen" if they don't. He gets very excited when able to do major police work like cracking cold cases or making arrests.
He seems to have a sort of symbiosis with his gun, and is able to drink by pouring liquid down the gun's barrel.
Abilities
* Limited flight via jetpack
* Can link up to other machines
* Powerful gun with multiple ammo types
* Being a member of the police, Browny has the authority to arrest and detain criminals, unlike most characters.
Weapons
* Electromagnetic Yo-Yo (Powerful plasma orb that is hard to control)
* Gemini Scatter (Boomerang bullets with a fair amount of power)
* Machine Gun (Standard gun with standard bullets)
* Shield Chaser (A spinning shield of plasma orbs that also function as homing shots)
* Victory Laser (A low-power laser that goes through barriers)
Possessions
* Hawaiian lei (Gift from Jumpropeman)
* Police hoverbike (Can transform into a bipedal mech form and a jetski form)
ClippitDebut: June 12, 2012
Status: Inactive
Origin: Windows 98
Text Color: Gray
Species: Paper clip
Height: 7 inches
Birthday: May 15 (Age: 1)
Alignment: Neutral Good
Likes: Assisting others, playing with computer programs, the phrase "It looks like you're X. Would you like help?"
Dislikes: Does not appear to be capable of showing dislike or hatred
Nicknames: Clippy
Character Theme: Windows Error Techno
He means well, he really does. Clippit (he prefers Clippy, Clippit is so formal!) lives inside Widow Maker's computer, which is located in the bar. He recently acquired the ability to speak, rather than just give the user of the computer messages in word bubbles.With this ability also comes the talent of leaving the computer to speak to others (he likens it to learning how to lucid dream). Clippit constantly butts in on conversations offering to help people by drawing on the might of Microsoft Encarta and the Internet of the 90s. He fancies himself a "Bar Assistant" and will stop at nothing to lend a hand. Unless you tell him to not show that tip again, in which case he will dutifully obey. He lives to serve, after all!
After making one too many screwups, Clippit received a bit of a lecture from Dirk about how he needed to change his ways. Can Clippit learn to control his impulses to scream at people eagerly about the activity they're currently engaged in?! Turns out it doesn't matter - a few months later Clippy was fired from Microsoft. He's off trying to find a new job...
Abilities
* Computer Jump (Can enter a computer by flying through its monitor)
* Flight (With paper)
* Hacking (Can hijack computer systems, including some sophisticated robotics)
* Information Paper (Clippit's paper can broadcast text from computer databases and Internet websites)
* Insufferable Optimism (Clippit is cheerful, upbeat, and loud almost all the time)
* The voice talents of Gilbert Gottfried
Debut: June 28, 2012
Status: Inactive
Origin: Bomberman Generation
Text Color: Dark green for Big Brother, light orange for Little Brother, alternating for Constructor X
Alignment: Lawful Good
Likes: Building things, destroying things, fighting
Dislikes: Lectures, cowardice, art lessons
Battle Theme: Bomberman Generation - Boss Battle
Extra Pictures: Big Brother, Little Brother
Two sentient construction vehicles that run a construction/demolition business. They show up at the scene of disasters to clear away rubble, or at construction sites to build new structures. When needed, they can combine and transform into the large mecha Constructor X, who yells a lot and is extremely overdramatic.
Abilities (Big Brother)
* Crushing Claw
* Drill Hand
* Front Plow (Can be used offensively as a flipper or defensively as a shield.)
Abilities (Little Brother)
* Dynamite (Can shoot dynamite from hatches on his body.)
Abilities (Constructor X)
* Crushing Claw (DROOOOP DEEEEEEEAD!!)
* Drill Hand (DRILLLLL KNUCKLLLLLLLE!!)
* Dynamite (YOU WILL FALLLLL!!)
* Laser Blade (I WILL DESTROY YOU... WITH MY LASER BLADE!!)
* Molten Gravel (GRAVEL... BLITZ!!)
The Five Mantis Band/The SwarmDebut: July 1, 2011 (mantids), October 9, 2011 (tarantulas), October 14, 2011 (beetles)
Status: Stag Beetle is Active, the rest are Inactive
Origin: Original
Text Color: <Black within arrow brackets when speaking the universal language of bugs>
Species: Praying Mantis/Stag Beetle/Rhinoceros Beetle/Tarantula
Height: 4 to 5 inches long (all species)
Birthday: Unknown (Age: Unknown)
Alignment: True Neutral
Likes: The Five-Mantis Band likes to perform. Stag Beetle likes to fight.
Dislikes: The band dislikes when somebody is off-key and they can't tell who. Stag Beetle hates mailmen.
Favorite Foods: The mantids and tarantulas like to eat small, weak insects.
Close Friends: Each other, Widow Maker, the Beer Garden Frogs
Extra Pictures: Stag Beetle's Kabuto Mushi vehicle
This ragtag band of arthropods arrived in the bar in several different ways, and they eventually all joined up into one swarm of bugs. There is safety in numbers.
The Swarm includes:
* The Five-Mantis Band (Five musically gifted praying mantids won by Widow Maker from Jumpropeman)
* Stag Beetle and Rhinoceros Beetle (Gifts from Zephyrus to Widow Maker)
* 3 Tarantulas (Recovered from a prank Shuma-Gorath played on Oceanus. Sarah saved a few of the spiders before Oceanus could stomp them all in his fit of fear and anger, and gave them to Widow Maker as a present.)
The Five-Mantis Band speaks in emoticons and formed a friendship with the Beer Garden Frogs. Stag Beetle tends to wander off on its own.
After spending the majority of the year at Widow Maker's Everglades home, the Five Mantis Band and Stag Beetle decided to return to Manhattan. The ensuing adventure likely would have made a great movie.
Later, Stag Beetle appeared on board the space station ZFS King of Beasts. No one knows how he got there. He spends his time in the restaurant area, watching life happen.
Abilities
* Flight (Five-Mantis Band, Stag Beetle, Rhinoceros Beetle)
* Inability To Give Any Fucks (Stag Beetle)
* Mild Poison (Tarantulas)
* Musical Talent (Five-Mantis Band)
Possessions
* Musical Instruments (Five-Mantis Band)
* Plastic Axe (Five-Mantis Band)
* Terrarrium Home (With carry handle!)
MissingnoDebut: July 31, 2012
Status: Retired
Origin: Pokemon
Text Color: Dark gray, speaks in Japanese
Species: Glitch
Height: 2 feet, 8 inches
Birthday: Unknown (Age unknown)
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Nicknames: M-No
Character Theme: Pokemon Yellow - Rainer
A glitchy computer program. Was originally used by Hotel Room Clippit in an attempt to destroy Bar Clippit, but Missingno itself does not seem to bear ill will. However, it is not supposed to exist in this world, and its continued presence causes occasional glitches in reality.
After growing homesick for its homeworld, Glitch City, Missingno enlisted Zephyrus to help it get home. Missingno's presence corrupted Zephyrus' sifter, however, which not only briefly turned the other people who accompanied them into Pokemon, it also damaged the Sifter almost beyond repair.
Abilities
* Flash Stepping (Missingno can move up or down normally, but must flash-step to move in other directions)
* Flight
* Glitch Touch (Anything Missingno touches is corrupted. The corruption wears off with time.)
* Item Duplication (Inanimate objects in Missingno's vicinity may occasionally be cloned 128 times. Does not work if there are already many identical objects in the vicinity. Missingno can force it to happen on purpose, but it also happens accidentally.)
Biollante/The MartianDebut: July 3, 2011 (Necronomitron), July 14, 2011 (Nostronomitron), July 31, 2011 (Biollante Rose), August 15, 2011 (Biollante Final Form)
Status: Retired
Origin: Godzilla/Zoofights
Text Color: Bold
Species: Fusion of Martian soul with Tendril, Godzilla, and Sarah DNA
Height: 100 feet
Birthday: Unknown (The Martian is at least 100 years old)
Alignment: Lawful Good
Likes: Protecting people from large and deadly forces
Dislikes: Bisontrain
Close Friends: Zephyrus
Nicknames: Nostro
Character Theme (The Martian): Mars Attacks - Title
Character Theme (Biollante): Godzilla vs. Biollante - Godzilla 1989
Extra Pictures: Original body, Necronomitron, Nostronomitron, Biollante Rose
Originally the Motherfucking Martian of Zoofights 3 fame, this beast was killed and retooled into the Necronomitron, a living book. Unable to compete, it was ejected from the Loser's League without a fight. For 100 years the book endured until close proximity to the cursed blade Sparda gave it power once more. Later, Zephyrus defeated the physical form of the Necronomitron. The Martian underwent a change of heart and created a new UFO-shaped body out of junkyard scrap, becoming The Nostronomitron. Later, Nostro created Biollante, and both were defeated by Celestia's WarMech army. In space, the two fused and became the final form of Biollante, now with the Martian's consciousness sharing the plant monster's brain.
Biollante now lives on Mars as the elected mayor of a large Martian city. The city was struck by an unnatural disaster when Doomrider's post-Big Bar Brawl partying caused an alcohol flood. Enraged over this callous disregard for its home planet, Biollante returned to Manhattan to settle the score. Once that was settled (and a related infestation of Destroyah was taken care of), Biollante returned to Mars to lead her people to a new era of hopeful prosperity.
Abilities
* Acid Sap (Biollante)
* Pollen Transformation (Biollante - can turn into golden pollen to travel through the sky/space)
* Regeneration (Biollante)
* Telekinesis (Martian)
* Telepathy (Martian)
Possessions
* Bicycle (Gift from Wall)
* Martian Flytraps (Gift from Zephyrus)
* Ur-Cola (Won bet from Sine Cosine)
Gust, Blade, and The Storm BikersDebut: April 15, 2012 (blog), May 8, 2012 (forum)
Status: Retired
Origin: Streets of Rage 2
Text Color: Dull green for Blade, bright red for Tornado and Hurricane, yellow for Gust and Gale
Species: Human
Height: Varies
Birthday: Unknown (All bikers are around 30 in age)
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral/Chaotic Evil
Likes (general): A world with no rules, no boundaries, and the freedom to do anything. Also motorcycles
Dislikes (general): Bar patrons who bring crazy crap into their city, referred to as "kobbers".
Likes (Gust): Blackbird
Dislikes (Gust): Life-and-death fighting
Character Theme: Streets of Rage Remake Beta - Spin on the Bridge
Battle Theme: Streets of Rage Remake - Expander
No relation to the son of Christopher Ravensky. Blade was the leader of a dangerous group of bikers that controlled part of New York. They sometimes feuded with the Excite Bikers, and frequently came out on top, until one last push forced the Excite Bikers out of their old territory, allowing the Storm Bikers to take over. Blade wears green gear and drives a matching green motorcycle. His two top underlings were named Tornado and Hurricane, and had red gear and bikes. Below them were Gust and Gale, who had yellow gear and bikes. His lower-ranked minions used blue gear and bikes and were referred to collectively as "The Blizzard". They were experts at fighting while riding.
To keep their position as the city's strongest gang, they accepted help from both the mysterious, miracle-granting Professor and the mad genius Dr. Bulgrave. Blade was taken down by the bar and sent to prison, while all of his allies except Gust and a few members of The Blizzard were killed. Two of the three Blizzard members were sent to Inferno, while the last went with Blade to The Tombs. Gust allied himself with Dr. Bulgrave and fell in love with his "coworker", Blackbird. He managed to avoid death and make another deal with the Professor to escape to a safe life with Blackbird - which turned out to be a stereotypical 1950s suburb, where Gust is a normal businessman named Lawrence and Blackbird a normal housewife - although the Blackbird here is not the one he originally fell in love with, but he doesn't know that...
The Blizzard member serving time with Blade was named Frost. After serving his time, he now owns a bike shop and has retired from a life of crime.
Abilities
* Swiss Army Arm (Gust's special power. Gave it up in exchange for peace.)
* Zoomorphing (Blade's special ability. Can assume the form of famous Zoofighters of the past.)
Possessions
* Cyclone II (A giant motorcycle built by Gust in memory of his bro Tornado. Features a ridiculous amount of weapons. Never saw use in combat due to Gust developing pacifistic attitudes.)
* Grenades
* Lead Pipes
* Motorcycles
* Steel Chains
Sweet Bro and Hella JeffDebut: May 30, 2011 (Hella Jeff), July 12, 2011 (Sweet Bro)
Status: Retired
Origin: Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff
Text Color: Red for Bro, blue for Jeff
Species: Unknown
Height: Roughly six feet, but it seems to change slightly
Birthday: Unknown (Ages unknown)
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Likes: The hot new game everyone's buzzing about these days
Dislikes: Boredom
Favorite Foods: Hot gods, Bimps, acorns
Close Friends: Each other
Nicknames: Blue-assed piece of shit
Character Theme: Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff the Movie
Battle Theme: Crazy Bus
Extra Pictures: Sweet Bro
When Widow Maker was unable to attend a few rounds of Zoofights, she hired Hella Jeff to vote in her stead, the reasoning being that if her sharp mind was getting things wrong, maybe someone incredibly dumb would provide a key insight. Hella Jeff unsettled the other patrons drastically, but didn't do anything overly evil until the Big Bar Brawl, where he revealed his shapeshifting abilities and became the horrific Helluva Jeff. He was defeated by being sucked into another dimension that gave him the brain and body shape of a lion. Sweet Bro, growing worried about his friend, has now set out to find Jeff and bring him home - and when he found Lion Jeff, the goal changed to get Jeff back to normal, THEN go home. After several failed attempts at getting Jeff "bapck to norman", Lion Jeff took the initiative, leading Sweet Bro out of the bar and into a higher plane of existence, where he reverted to "normal". Now, the two friends can game in peace.
They occasionally show up in unexpected places.
Abilities
* Hella Jeff can warp reality. Sweet Bro can as well, but only if it makes his skateboarding more extreme.
* Hella Jeff can teleport from one place to another, and can fit himself into things he shouldn't logically be able to.
* Jeff is imune to Sarah's curative magic, but he doesn't need it - he seems to recover from death on his own if given time.
Garland the ChaoticDebut: July 5, 2011 (flashback), August 24, 2012 (in-person)
Status: Retired
Origin: Final Fantasy 1
Text Color: Dark blue
Species: Human
Height: 6 feet, 7 inches
Birthday: Unknown (Age: 44)
Alignment: Lawful Evil
Likes: Crushing the lesser beneath his armored boots, knocking people down
Dislikes: Celestia and her children, anything that stands between himself and having their heads on sticks
Nicknames: The Chaotic One
Character Theme: Final Fantasy 1 - Final Battle
Extra Pictures: Charging
A dark knight who kidnapped the king's daughter. Sarah, her father, and her sisters rescued her by defeating Garland in combat. Nine years later, he plotted revenge against the family, seeking to kill them all and restore his twisted honor. Garland was trained not only as a Dark Knight but also was well-equipped in black magic and moderately proficient at white magic. His best magic was summoning, which he used to recruit a slew of monsters and even some humans he had killed over the years.
Gloria ran him over with a train. It was rad.
Debut: July 30, 2011 (Tiamat), August 31, 2011 (Marilith), September 9, 2011 (Kraken), September 16, 2011 (Cagnazzo), September 17, 2011 (Lich)
Status: Retired
Origin: Final Fantasy 1/4
Text Color: Dark green for Tiamat, bright red for Marilith, dull yellow for Lich, steel blue for Kraken.
Species: Tiamat = dragon, Marilith = lamia, Lich = lich, Kraken = kraken, Cagnazzo = demon turtle
Height: Tiamat is 100 feet tall. Lich and Kraken are around 20 feet tall. Marilith is about 50 feet long. Cagnazzo is about 30 feet long.
Birthday: Unknown (Thousands of years old)
Alignment: Tiamat, Lich, and Marilith are Lawful Evil. Cagnazzo is Chaotic Evil. Kraken is True Neutral.
Likes: Power, devious plotting, kicking around lesser beings
Dislikes: The Warriors of Light, incompetent minions
Battle Theme 1: Final Fantasy - Fiends of Earth and Water
Battle Theme 2: Final Fantasy - Fiends of Fire and Wind
Extra Pictures: Marilith, Lich, Kraken, Cagnazzo
The Four Fiends were four giant monsters out to claim the elemental crystals from the Warriors of Light (Sarah, Alex, Zephyrus, and Erebus). Through a series of battles, all were killed save Kraken, who left the group to swim the world's oceans.
Abilities
* Tiamat can breathe fire, teleport, create tornadoes, and transform into a female King Ghidorah named Queen Ghidorah.
* Marilith can cast fire spells, wields six swords (one for each arm), and can raise her internal body temperature at will.
* Lich can search the minds of nearby foes to create shadow clones of foes they've defeated in the past. These clones are weaker than the real things defensively, but are roughly equal offensively. He can also cast black magic.
* Kraken can cast water and thunder spells and spray blinding ink onto his foes.
* Cagnazzo can use Tsunami, a tremendously powerful tidal wave attack. He regenerates his body by hiding in his shell.
Marlin the Magnificent/New MarlinniumDebut: August 15, 2010
Status: Retired
Origin: Original
Text Color: Dark blue
Species: Marlin
Height: 15 feet long
Birthday: Unknown (Age unknown)
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Likes: Proving his strength
Dislikes: Widow Maker, The Lord of the Night, brain teasers, snakes
Favorite Foods: Fish
Extra Pictures: Original appearance
Widow Maker's opponent in the alternate Zoofights she hails from. Both were taken to this universe by Gamma Constrictor in Zoofights 5. Although Widow Maker killed Marlin, he was revived by WCW and given a replacement head, plus new weapons. Widow Maker managed to tame New Marlinnium and convince him to enter Fite Yer Lord. Sadly, New Marlinnium was Mr. Evil Midnight's first kill in that fight, and the complete disintegration of his body made revival impossible.
Abilities
* Flight via jetpack
* Can communicate by scrawling words on stuff
MINOR CHARACTERS
Anaconda (Pic)
Origin: Anaconda
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Year: 2012
Normally kept at the local zoo, the anaconda escaped one day and started going after the populace. Fortunately, its first target was Sarah and Sakura Atari, and Sarah held it off with a Protect spell until Browny arrived on the scene with backup to recapture the snake and get it back where it belonged.
Origin: Streets of Rage 2
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2012
Character Theme: Streets of Rage 2 - In The Bar
Barbon owns a fite club and tavern in Manhattan, and is the bartender and occasional participant. With Gezora apparently permanently out of the bartending scene, Widow Maker roped Barbon into taking on a job as the replacement bartender. In November, Barbon closed up shop to return to his own bar - but it had been destroyed in a fire. Undaunted, Barbon plans to rebuild and start over.
Beelzebub (Pic)
Origin: Final Fantasy 2
Alignment: Varies
Year: 2011
A high-ranking demon of the underworld who acts as the devil equivalent in Elohim religion. Beelzebub has been used by four different users despite his minor status.
Beheeyem (Pic)
Origin: Pokemon
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Year: 2013
Beheeyem is the owner and operator of the ZFS King of Beasts' Fite Club. The way he acts sometimes, it's as if he's managing a rowdy crowd of children, not a group of professional brawlers.
Cannonbeetle
Origin: M Sheep
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2012
A robot invented by Lady Purnima, this machine masquerades as a normal cannonball, and can be used as such. After impact, however, it transforms into a beetle-like robot with chainsaw mandibles to continue the fight. One of them wandered into the bar, and Skeiron brought it to Celestia. After some rewiring of its AI, it now serves as an extra bodyguard for the lab.
Chair (Pic)
Origin: Original
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2011, 2013
A chair from the bar. After being destroyed by a drunken Erebus for the crime of allegedly supporting New Croak over Crystal Pep-Simian, the chair ascended to Chair Heaven.
Chattery Teeth (Pic)
Origin: Nightmares and Dreamscapes
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Year: 2011
This terrifying tin toy walked on its own and attacked the bar from the rear, ready to chew holes in everything! Luckily the Five-Mantis Band teamed up with the beetle duo and the tarantulas in The Swarm's finest hour to destroy the abomination before it could do any significant damage.
Construct 8 (Pic)
Origin: Final Fantasy Tactics
Text Color: Bold grey
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Year: 2013
Construct 8 was given to Alexander Triden as a Christmas gift from Jumpropeman in the first season of RP. In the third season Construct 8 finally appears in person to assist Sarah's sisters in combat. Construct 8 talks in complicated, rambling sentences, and his time as what was essentially Alex and Sarah's butler has given him some strange ideas of what the average person wants in a bodyguard - particularly constant offerings of food and plush toys.
Cooltrainer (Pic)
Origin: Pokemon
Alignment: Lawful Evil
Year: 2012
A member of the Cooltrainer elite force. Their orders are to destroy any glitch-type Pokemon that appear in Kanto, to keep the country's economy and traditional way of life intact without their reality-altering and cloning powers messing things up. This Cooltrainer's team included Golem, Octillery, and Magneton.
Dagahra (Pic 1) (Pic 2) (Pic 3)
Origin: Rebirth of Mothra II
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Year: 2012
Character Theme: Rebirth of Mothra II - Dagahra Comes Ashore
Slumbering on the ocean floor for centuries, Dagahra awoke due to the rising levels of pollution in the world. Attracted to a spot that Mr. X had been using as a garbage dump, the monster was attacked by Garland, who successfully killed it - not to keep the world safe, but so he could summon and control the beast himself.
Deadeye Joe (Pic)
Origin: Contra Hard Corps
Text Color: Bright red
Alignment: Neutral Evil
Year: 2012
A small-time criminal with a few cyberpunk enhancements. Attempted to hold the local post office's mail hostage in exchange for an armored truck full of money, but was foiled by Browny and a small group of bargoers. Currently behind bars.
Dean Hardscrabble (Pic)
Origin: Monsters University
Text Color: Dusty Rose
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Year: 2013
On Baltan and Kauket's home planet, Dean Hardscrabble is the head of the Travel Studies Commission, assigned to review the progress and papers of those who are receiving government grants to travel to other planets. While a hardass, the Dean is not cruel and truly does want her students to succeed, as space travel is considered an extremely valuable privilege no one should lose.
Destroyah (Pic 1) (Pic 2) (Pic 3) (Pic 4)
Origin: Godzilla
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Year: 2012
Character Theme: Godzilla vs. Destroyah - The Birth of Adult Destroyah
Mutated from microscopic Martian life forms when the Oxygen Destroyer went off during Biollante's fite with Doomrider. The organisms live only to kill, and kill indiscriminately. They're capable of dissolving organics with their venom, meaning the best defense against them is to either be a robot or have REALLY good armor/healing factor.
Dr. Bartholomew Welward (Pic)
Origin: Original
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2012
Character Theme: Assassin's Creed 2 - The Plague
Some say death follows Dr. Welward. In reality, he follows death - his specialty in medicine is the study of the dying, with his pet subject being the Black Plague. Starting with the minor Plague outbreak in Gunningshire five years ago, he began wearing a plague doctor mask, first out of necessity and then out of fashion. He is a long-time colleague of Dr. Bulgrave, and one of the closest things to a friend Bulgrave had for years.
Dr. Rabbit (Pic)
Origin: Dr. Rabbit's World Tour
Text Color: Light purple
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Year: 2012
Dr. Rabbit is the world's only rabbit dentist! He travels around in his hot air balloon
Electra (Pic)
Origin: Streets of Rage 2
Text Color: Steel blue
Alignment: Neutral Good
Year: 2012
The unofficial leader of Widow Maker's Fite Club. Electra was the top fighter there until Widow Maker and Sarah beat her back-to-back. She still holds a lot of sway in the club, however. Cocky and snobbish, Electra nonetheless has real power behind her boasts. Her left hand has been replaced with a bionic replacement in the form of a retractable electric whip. With Barbon busy at the King of Beasts as the replacement bartender for the MIA Gezora, Electra took over at the club as the owner and bartender until it was destroyed by dragons when Garland unleashed a swarm of them on the city.
Elohim (Pic)
Origin: Zoofights
Text Color: Orange
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2011
The moth-centipede-alien god from Zoofights 4. Although destroyed in that tournament's final battle, Elohim ascended to true godhood and found inner peace. Revered by many insects, Elohim grants favors to his followers in exchange for their loyalty. Widow Maker is one of his most devoted disciples.
The Excite Biker Gang (Pic)
Origin: ExciteBike
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Year: 2012
Character Theme: ExciteBike World Rally - London
Text Color: Red for Excite Red, blue for Excite Blue, green for Excite Green
A band of hooligans clothed in red, blue, and green biker outfits. There's only one red guy, and he's the leader. They enjoyed a life of delinquency until Sarah put them in their place, earning a motorcycle in the process she used frequently until it was lost in the Race Yer Mates event. They're a bit more law-abiding now, but Red is still a rebel at heart. With the Storm Bikers out of action, the Excite Bikers just might be able to reclaim their old territory.
Fire Breath (Pic)
Origin: Sonic the Hedgehog 3
Alignment: Lawful Good
Year: 2013
A mysterious round craft about four or five feet tall that is equipped with a flamethrower and fire extinguisher. The Fire Breath drops out of the sky when people in Orvance are in danger and scouts them, waiting for a chance to drop in and add to the attack. Who controls Fire Breath, and where did it come from?
Firebro
Origin: Starcraft
Text Color: Bright red
Alignment: Neutral Good
Year: 2012
A random, unnamed male Terran Firebat who was originally part of a group of generic marines The Deleter added to one of his RP events to fill out the good guy ranks. However, for this event the only character I brought was Widow Maker, and she was severely damaged very early on. To stay in the game, Widow Maker commandeered this Firebat and rode him around. He made a return appearance in a later mission, but was unfortunately killed offscreen. Widow Maker honored him with a gravestone in the bar's cemetery, which also acts as a tribute to all those faceless soldier units out there who fight and die for justice.
Gamble Man (Pic)
Origin: Mega Man 72
Alignment: Neutral Good
Year: 2012
Character Theme: Mega Man 72 - Rushing Roulette
The owner and operator of a casino that has joined up with Tridenland. Gamble Man is very excitable and hawks his establishment like a carny. He's a Zephyrus fanboy.
Garland's Summons
Origin: Final Fantasy 1/2/3/4/5/6
Alignment: Lawful Evil
Year: 2012
Garland had the ability to summon monsters he had slain in combat in the past. The monsters seen were Scarmiglione, Ahriman, Antlion, Omega, Phantom Train, Ultros, Shinryu, and Astaroth. Gloria's summon, Icicle, killed Phantom Train, allowing Gloria to "steal" the summon from Garland.
Giant Fly and Giant Leech
Origin: Original
Text Color: Dark orange for Giant Fly, dark purple for Giant Leech
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2013
Two unfortunates who decided to go bar-hopping in a city ruled by creatures who don't take kindly to intruders. The leech was murdered, while the fly was merely stripped of his wings and one leg.
Gigas Worm (Pic)
Origin: Final Fantasy 1
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Year: 2011
Stag Beetle fought and defeated this monster on the morning of the Zoofights tournament final to win a revival.
Glitches (Pic)
Origin: Pokemon
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Year: 2012
A team of glitch Pokemon recruited by Missingno to help beat back Garland's dragons. Glitches seen include but are not limited to Charizard M, Glitcherino, 7PKMNV, and 'Ng'Mp. It is unknown how Missingno got word that the fight was even happening...
Gloria's Summons
Origin: Final Fantasy 1/Final Fantasy 2
Alignment: Lawful Good
Year: 2012, 2013
Various monsters Gloria uses summon magic to spawn. They are fairly powerful but not very bright. Monsters seen so far include Spider, Icicle, Allosaurus, Slime, Bomb, Death Eye, Blue Dragon, and Phantom Train.
Huge Hermit (Pic)
Origin: Metal Slug 3
Text Color: Light blue, no-caps, large font size
Alignment: Neutral Good
Year: 2013
This building-sized fusion of crab and cannon was actually suplexed and pinned by Utsuho Reiuji in a Fite Club duel. He speaks by holding up cardboard signs with short phrases written on them in crayon.
Killbot (Pic)
Origin: Chopping Mall
Text Color: Red and ALL CAPS
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Year: 2011, 2012
Killbots are security robots lethally armed to take out trespassers. Three of them prowl Tridenland alongside Celestia's WarMechs.
Hotel Room Clippit (Pic)
Origin: Windows 98
Text Color: Gray
Alignment: Lawful Evil
Year: 2012
Not all Clippits are sentient, but some are. One such Clippit was a jaded soul that had seen dozens if not hundreds of people shout him down for his uselessness when he just wanted to show them how to write a letter. As a result, he became cynical and gruff, smoking digital cigarettes and insulting the users. Morgana treated him with respect, however, and he helped her by directing her to the King of Beasts. Hotel Room Clippit hates Bar Clippit because he feels his personality type is the reason Office Assistants are loathed, and he used Morgana as an unknowing messenger to infect Bar Clippit with Missingno. Upon finding that she had been used, Morgana returned and cursed Hotel Room Clippit to a limbo of undeath, unintentionally freeing Missingno and destroying the hotel computer in the process.
Julia
Origin: Verbot
Text Color: Code Box
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2012
Julia is a chatbot frequently visited by Clippy, who treats her as a cross between a psychologist and a close friend. Clippy pours his heart out to Julia whenever he has a personal crisis, such as anxiety over the Big Bar Brawl or fear of being fired by Microsoft due to his absence being a major selling point of Office XP. It is unknown if Julia truly tries to help or is completely automated.
Lance (Pic 1) (Pic 2)
Origin: Pokemon
Text Color: Red
Alignment: Lawful Evil
Year: 2012
Battle Theme: Pokemon HeartGold and SoulSilver - Champion
The Dragon Master. Lance trains dragon types and Pokemon that could pass for dragon types, and is the top authority of the anti-glitch forces. He faced a team of bargoers turned into Pokemon with only one member of his team with him - Gyarados. While the sea serpent was incredibly powerful and was able to hold off all his opponents for a time, he eventually became overwhelmed and Lance was forced to retreat.
Lily Limbcake (Pic)
Origin: Zoofights
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Year: 2011
The spirit of Lily Limbcake, made flesh with the Necronomitron's power to revive the dead. Assisted Necro against Zephyrus in a Fite Yer Mates battle. Killed by Zephyrus (played by RedSpy)
Mars People (Pic)
Origin: Metal Slug
Alignment: Neutral Good
Year: 2012
The Fite Club Open House held by the fite club Widow Maker frequents attracted a lot of strange characters the bar was unfamiliar with. This fellow was one such character. He faced Sine Cosine in his match, and lost. The two parted on good terms, with the alien wishing Sine well for Big Bar Brawl II. The Mars People race lives throughout parts of Mars, and many are found in a capital city that is run by Biollante.
Martian UFO (Pic)
Origin: War of the Worlds
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2011
This unmanned flying machine assisted Biollante in a Fite Yer Mates battle. Killed by Zephyrus.
Medusa (Pic)
Origin: Castle Crashers
Text Color: Green
Alignment: Lawful Evil
Year: 2013
A denizen of one of the marshy swamps of Orvance. Medusa was used by Shroud to teach the Great Conehead Brigade a lesson, but it got out of hand and some people wound up hurt. Particularly Medusa, who died.
Minwu (Pic)
Origin: Final Fantasy 2
Alignment: Lawful Good
Year: 2011, 2012
A high-ranking doctor at Curaga General Hospital. For a brief period between their arrival in Manhattan and the beginning of Zoofights 6, Sarah and her sisters worked here as nurses, with Minwu acting as their boss.
Mr. X (Pic)
Origin: Streets of Rage
Text Color: Dull green
Alignment: Lawful Evil
Year: 2012
Battle Theme: Streets of Rage 2 - The Return of Mr. X
A powerful businessman and former crime boss, Mr. X was clever enough and slippery enough that despite the fall of his empire a few years ago, he avoided any criminal charges. He operated just within the law, always technically legal but rarely morally or ethically right, avoiding prosecution and earning the anger of many, including Browny for his flaunting of the law and Ariel for his destruction of the environment. After Ariel and Clippy hacked into his computer and found incriminating documents, Browny, Ariel, Electra, Kayle, and Zephyrus cornered X at his headquarters, eventually defeating him and sending him to prison.
Mr. X's Goons
Origin: Streets of Rage 2
Text Color: Bright red for Souther, red for Big Ben, gray for Jet
Alignment: Lawful Evil/Chaotic Evil
Year: 2012
Mr. X's empire was not as large as it used to be, but he had still commanded a fair-sized squad until the end. His three top allies were Big Ben, an obese man with the ability to breathe fire; Jet, a psycho who puttered around on a jetpack; and Souther, a completely insane mutant human who fought with Wolverine claws and graceful acrobatics. Backing them up were a swarm of similar-looking thugs all named Galsia. After X's defeat, the Galsias scattered into the city, Big Ben and Jet were arrested, and Souther got his head punched off by Kayle.
Mr. X's Robots
Origin: Streets of Rage 2/3
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2012
Three bizarre, hopping robots that served Mr. X, although they have only a crude AI and no communication ability. The leader of the trio was Particle, a cyclopean seven-foot brute with extendable maces for arms. Its allies were P1 units, equipped with laser guns and booster wheels. They were disabled in the final fight against Mr. X.
Nuclear Treant (Pic)
Origin: Original
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Year: 2013
Created from an accident involving Utsuho Reiuji, a greenhouse, and some leftover DNA from the European Onion, this tree-bodied terror wrecked havoc on the ZFS King of Beasts for a short time until it was successfully destroyed by some of the stronger patrons.
Officer Meekins
Origin: Ace Attorney
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Year: 2012
One of the many bumbling, rather useless ordinary human police officers working under Browny. Shouts a lot.
Ogre (Pic)
Origin: Final Fantasy 1
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Year: 2011
One minute he was chasing the Great Conehead Brigade, the next minute Fire Breath dropped out of the sky and attacked, and it was all ogre.
Painter (Pic)
Origin: Castle Crashers
Alignment: Neutral
Text Color: Grey and ALL-CAPS
Year: 2013
One of the characters working at Beheeyem's Fite Club. Painter was accidentally killed by Hypotenuse when their battle got out of hand. Beheeyem was able to resurrect him.
Paul (Pic)
Origin: Original
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Year: 2012
A lumberjack who is part of a logging company. They were hired by Mr. X to chop down trees to make room for oil drilling. Paul is a laid-back sort who takes things in stride and is used to having his logging projects interrupted by Ariel and her fellow activists. He also has a truly monstrous axe, and presumably knows how to use it. One of his associates is named Jake.
Penny (Pic)
Origin: Original
Alignment: Lawful Good
Year: 2012
If you see Ariel hard at work campaigning to improve the world, Penny is likely to be alongside her. She is Ariel's best friend, and just as ridiculously enthusiastic about activism as she is. They share many tastes and personality traits, and frequently scheme together to brainstorm new ideas for their movement.
Princess Sarah
Origin: Final Fantasy 1
Alignment: Neutral Good
Year: 2011
The king's daughter and your run-of-the-mill distressed damsel. Sarah Triden got her first name from her memory of helping to save Princess Sarah. She thought it was a pretty name, and it was the first that came to mind when she was asked to provide a name.
Refbot (Pic)
Origin: Robot Wars
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Year: 2012
The new Fite Yer Mates referee. He debuted in the final Fite of 2012: Zephyrus, Oceanus, and Poseidon versus X Demolition and Slime-Inator. He now makes regular appearances in Fite Yer Mates 2013.
Sakura Atari
Origin: Original
Text Color: Burnt Orange
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Year: 2011, 2012
Battle Theme: Scott Pilgrim vs The World - Miniboss
The world's unluckiest woman. Poor Sakura doesn't even know anyone at the bar, yet she keeps getting caught up in the fallout of their antics. She's been beaten by a drunken Randy Avalon armed with a fire extinguisher, attacked by The Sheep about half a dozen times, and who knows what the hell Dr. Albrecht did to her. Still, she continues to try and eke out a living as a freelance reporter, chasing the next big scoop. Seems to be especially targeted by characters controlled by M Sheep. After a few too many accidents, plus an odd reluctance to leave Manhattan, Sakura enrolled in a self-defense class and passed with flying colors. She now knows advanced martial arts techniques and is now possibly the most potent hand-to-hand non-super in the RP-verse. She has a sister named Reiko Atari who works for Greentech's Monster Mash Loser's League.
Samus Aran (Pic)
Origin: Metroid
Text Color: Sepia
Alignment: Lawful Good
Year: 2012
Samus is one of several characters seen at the Fite Club Open House. She faced Erebus and lost. They consider each other worthy opponents and parted on good terms. Samus later reappeared as a character played by The Ruby Chao.
Sarah's Father (Pic)
Origin: Final Fantasy 1/Final Fantasy Tactics
Text Color: Bright red
Alignment: Lawful Good
Year: 2012, 2013
A male white mage who was largely responsible for training Sarah and her sisters in the ways of the white mage. It is from him that Sarah gets her blond hair and youthful appearance. He died several years ago, and the circumstances of his death are shrouded in mystery. Sarah and her family seem to know what happened, but have never told a soul, and Celestia gets distraught when the subject is brought up...
Simon 1994rd (Pic)
Origin: Contra Hard Corps
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Year: 2012
Battle Theme: Contra Hard Corps - Simon 1994rd
A robot that can pull dead fish from hammerspace and wields a ball-and-chain. Can function without his head. Faced Widow Maker during the Fite Club Open House and won, much to Widow Maker's annoyance and disappointment.
Sir Barnaby McManus von Buxton the Third (Pic)
Origin: Original
Alignment: Neutral Douche
Year: 2012
This pompous man is essentially the Squilliam Fancyson to Dr. Bulgrave's Squidward. Haughty, arrogant, and kind of a dick, Barnaby was "born lucky" and seems to be successful at everything he tries. Not that he himself does much - he has legions of workers at his command to do the hard work for him. But don't expect Barnaby to attack our heroes - he's perfectly content to gloat about his completely legal and not even that morally wrong gains in as douchey a way as possible.
Slappy (Pic)
Origin: Goosebumps
Text Color: Red
Alignment: Neutral Evil
Year: 2012
A highly annoying ventriloquists' dummy who insults everyone and seems to have dark powers. Another Fite Club Open House entrant. He faced Sister Alice.
Socket (Pic)
Origin: Socket
Text Color: Yellow
Alignment: Neutral Good
Year: 2013
A totally radical mascot reject who faced the similarly rad Wheeler in a Fite Club duel. Socket lost.
Snake (Pic)
Origin: Final Fantasy 1
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Year: 2012
A random snake that Sarah's dad killed in one hit, proving how awesome he is.
Space Invaders (Pic 1) (Pic 2)
Origin: Space Invaders
Text Color: Red
Alignment: Neutral Good
Year: 2013
A red ship that fights with hologram-like artificial Invaders it creates using an internal generator. A member of Beheeyem's Fite Club, it was defeated by Dirk.
Spitfire (Pic)
Origin: Original
Text Color: Green
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Year: 2013
Not much is known about Spitfire, except that she lives somewhere in The Hub and is a member of an organization of sentient invertebrates called "The Valkyries" that rule their district with an iron claw. Any non-Valkyrie invertebrates found trespassing are murdered or worse.
Sponia (Pic)
Origin: Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door
Text Color: Orange
Alignment: Huh?
Year: 2013
An ancient OC of mine based on the Spania enemy from the Paper Mario series, resurrected into a Fite Club opponent for General Cleft. Sponia's a friendly sort, and tougher than he looks in battle, but he has extremely poor memory and isn't very smart besides. After a long battle, Sponia got confused and pinned himself.
Stormtrooper Squad (Pic)
Origin: Star Wars
Text Color: White
Alignment: Lawful Stupid
Year: 2013
The ZFS King of Beasts' top-quality security force. They tend to come out on the wrong end of every RP event they get involved in. They are referred to by letters and commanded by TYP-E. Trooper B is the replacement bartender when Sheryl is unavailable.
Tatzelwurms and Amphipteres (Pic 1) (Pic 2)
Origin: Cryptozoology/mythology
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Year: 2013
These dangerous beasts are the size of strong men and live in caves scattered around the planet of Ardea. Tatzelwurms are low-slung beasts similar to a cross between a crocodile and a salamander. Amphipteres are winged serpents.
Tom (Pic)
Origin: Toonami
Alignment: Neutral Good
Year: 2013
After losing his last job as a host for a programming block of Japanese animation, Tom makes a living as a space taxi driver, ferrying people to places like the ZFS King of Beasts.
Topmaniac (Pic)
Origin: Super Mario Galaxy
Alignment: Neutral
Year: 2013
Another Fite Club character. This one managed to pin Samus completely by accident.
TYP-E (Pic)
Origin: WALL-E
Alignment: Lawful Neutral
Year: 2013
TYP-E is the overseer of the ZFS King of Beasts' drop pod garage. Here, patrons can quickly enter and exit the ship via small rockets, allowing them to visit the planet Ardea with minimal fuss.
Warmech Squad
Origin: Final Fantasy 1
Text Color: Light gray
Alignment: True Neutral
Year: 2011/2012
A swarm of robots identical to Skeiron in appearance. They were initially all destroyed when Celestia attacked the bar. However, Draco, ever the gentleman, had four of them rebuilt. These four now work as ticket-takers and security guards for Tridenland and go by the designations Alpha, Beta, Gamma, and Delta. Delta has graduated from "super-minor character" to "minor character useful for only one storyline" after assisting Sine Cosine as she coped with the Mark of the Yellow King.
DR. BULGRAVE'S ARMY
Anguis Summus (Pic)
Origin: Original
This mechanical dragon has very limited AI and is more like a vehicle than a sentient robot. It is able to attack things on its own, but Bulgrave can easily override any automated movements with his own piloting.
Cleptopod (Pic)
Origin: Zoofights/Original
Cleptopod was once Octopus Crime, World Creature Wars veteran. Rescued from the arena after the Royal Rumble at Widow Maker's request, Sarah took the dead body to surgineering, where he was revived by her sisters. Later, Dr. Bulgrave found, captured, and significantly upgraded Octopus Crime, turning it into Cleptopod, a powerful Zoofighter-like creature that can wield many weapons with ease. When Cleptopod got a good look at Widow Maker after she was captured, memories of its revival began to rise, and when it saw Sarah, it became fully submissive. Its' current whereabouts are somewhere unknown in Manhattan.
Clockwork Mantis (Pic)
Origin: Original
A mass-produced two-foot robot type that fought in a massive swarm. They lacked anything too potent offense-wise, though, so they were dispatched fairly easily by Oceanus and Lady Purnima.
Clockwork Spider (Pic)
Origin: Original
These small steampunkian robots, with bodies six inches long, are mass-produced by Dr. Bulgrave. They are great at small menial chores such as dusting and picking up stray litter or small objects. They have started appearing in the Zoofights universe, gradually increasing their numbers. They are attracted to Widow Maker and play old music from the end of the 19th and beginning of the 20th century. There are also black-colored spiders that are far more malevolent, trying to stab people with rusty syringe fangs. The normal spiders will attack the black ones, but the black ones can force the normal ones to work for them by stabbing their legs into the normal spiders' bodies, linking up to create a hivemind of destruction. After the whirlwind events of the Bulgrave plot, only a few clockwork spiders still exist, all of them the harmless original models. Two are owned by Celestia, and one is owned by Kayle. A few may also still wander the streets of Manhattan.
Flame Cauldron (Pic)
Origin: Original
One of Dr. Bulgrave's robot servants. The Flame Cauldron was born after Dr. Bulgrave was inspired by seeing newspaper articles featuring Amanda Svilzerian in her Firebat suit. It can send smoke signals, shoot fire and fireballs from its arm cannons, and the stomach grille opens up to belch a giant burst of flame, and possibly even scoop up an opponent and cook them. It appears to be able to command the mass-produced robots. After a long fight of attrition, the combined efforts of Zephyrus and Mach eventually destroyed the Flame Cauldron, who proved to have a bit of an attitude if its ability to flip the bird with fire was any indication.
Golden Robo Q (Pic)
Origin: Henry Hatsworth
Dr. Bulgrave's new battle suit, created as his first new invention after his release from prison. It features jump jets, rocket fists, and (of course) steam power.
Kasai Rex (Pic)
Origin: Cryptozoology/Jurassic Park/Axe Cop
A living dinosaur captured by Dr. Bulgrave in an attempt to bulk up his army. It was sent into battle soon after receiving some upgrades Gust came up with. Unfortunately for it, Jaxx Tantra decided he wanted to fight it and kill it, and what Jaxx Tantra says goes.
Mammoth (Pic)
Origin: Warmachine
One of two giant mechas, the crown jewels of Dr. Bulgrave's robotic force. Wields an icy axe. Destroyed by Erebus one-on-one in the Widow Maker kidnapping.
Ol' Rowdy (Pic)
Origin: Warmachine
One of two giant mechas, the crown jewels of Dr. Bulgrave's robotic force. Wields a giant electric hammer. Participated in and survived the successful kidnapping of Widow Maker, although it was bested by Eshe in combat.
Potens Tritura (Pic)
Origin: Original
A steampunk tank with fire attacks and homing missiles. Destroyed in Bulgrave's last stand.
Project 29 (Pic)
Origin: Original
The "Projects" are a group of mutant praying mantids created by Dr. Bulgrave, with the goal being to create a second Widow Maker (who was Project 28). However, it has proven very difficult if not impossible to recreate her. The rejects at least make good foot soldiers. Project 29 is a hulking monster over 20 feet tall that looks like Widow Maker on steroids. This brute has the highest strength-to-size ratio of all of the Projects. It was killed by the Robot Bros, Zephyrus and Oceanus, in the Widow Maker kidnapping event.
Project 30 (Pic)
Origin: Original
Project 30, an abnormally speedy mutant with grossly elongated mandibles, yellow eyes, and a voice like microphone feedback, participated in the construction site battle alongside Project 31 and the Storm Bikers but was destroyed completely thanks to Chet (played by saberwulf) using the most overkill gun possible on it.
Project 31 (Pic)
Origin: Original
Another one of the "Projects". Project 31 looks more like Widow Maker, but does not share her intelligence. Instead, 31 relies on predatory instinct and flamethrowers for hands to get the job done. 31 was defeated in battle at the construction site by Marcus.
Project 32 (Pic)
Origin: Original
Project 32 is a burly Widow Maker clone with big muscly arms. Unlike Widow Maker, 32 is bipedal, the middle legs almost useless. It was the first of the Projects to appear. 32 boasted immense physical strength, but it was defeated by a furious Widow Maker after it critically injured Sarah.
Project 33 (Pic)
Ever have one of those situations when you just don't know what to do with something? That's what we at Bulgrave Inc feel like with Project 33. We've all sorts of insect parts lying around down in the Laboratory from Projects that have come and gone, but those Projects took a nasty beating and we're just not sure as to how we should put it back together. So, we used the spaghetti strategy. We took everything we had and we threw it at the wall. What stuck formed Project 33.
Project 34 (Pic)
Origin: Original
Probably the most horrifying of all the Projects, Project 34 is a malformed abomination barely resembling an insect at all, with a second, limbless mantis inside the dome on its head. The two were symbiotic to each other - the small one needed the big one to nourish it, while the big one benefited from the small one's extra attack power - electric and psychic waves.
Project 35 (Pic 1) (Pic 2)
Origin: Original
Project 35, at first glance, is a giant, hundred-foot snakelike mantis with demon horns, multiple claws forming grotesque fingers, three eyes, and acid vomit. However, this horror is only the real Project's conjoined twin, taking the place of the monster's tongue. Although the "tongue" was killed by Morgana after a serious struggle, it was revived by accident due to a botched attack by Phantomon. Project 35's main body proved almost indestructible, taking absolutely no damage from the full might of Caetus Vastitatem. Eventually, after Dr. Bulgrave surrendered, he called off Project 35, and it returned to its underground home. It is one of only three surviving Projects, the others being Project 39 and Widow Maker herself.
Project 36 (Pic)
Origin: Original
Yet another of Dr. Bulgrave's "Projects". This one is a hundred-foot-long centipede-like mutant with a hammer on its back and a ninja star buzzsaw six feet across on its tail. It is able to move extremely quickly despite its size, and is the second-fastest Project (30 is the fastest). It was killed by the Robot Bros in the Widow Maker kidnapping event.
Project 37 (Pic 1) (Pic 2)
Origin: Original
Giant, grotesque, and maker of mooks, Project 37 looks intimidating and boasts a giant fang and several spined tentacles, but Mach proved to outmatch it by closing up its rear end, causing its constant maggot production to backfire on it. The maggots themselves have burning drool and sharp fangs, and are three feet in length.
Project 38 (Pic)
Origin: Original
One of Dr. Bulgrave's odder creations (and that's saying a lot), Project 38 is roughly the same size as Widow Maker, and seems to have features based off other creepy crawlies besides mantids. Its' spinning claw hands look like earwig pinchers, the jaws resemble a beetles', and the eyes are on stalks like a snail. 38 participated in the Widow Maker kidnapping, and although it was heavily damaged by Alex the boxing raptor, it survived the ordeal and fled. It returned in the battle at Bulgrave's castle, managing to KO Oceanus before a seriously pissed Zephyrus finished it off.
Project 39 (Pic)
Origin: Original
It's a praying mantis. In a jar. I dunno, maybe Dr. Bulgrave never got around to surgineering this one. Now in the possession of Morgana.
Project 40 (Pic)
Origin: Magic the Gathering
The only mutant Project to have a design not of my creation. Project 40, unlike the other Projects, was produced in multiples as a way to test a pack predator. Their only special ability is a cloaking mechanism similar to Widow Maker's. Aside from that, they're all fangs and claws. The pack, consisting of four beasts, was killed in battle outside Dr. Bulgrave's castle.
Steam Boiler (Pic)
Origin: Original
The Steam Boiler is a soldier unit mass-produced by Dr. Bulgrave. They are built for defense and can fire boiling steam from the grille on their "face".
Steam Stallion (Pic)
Origin: Original
Another weak mass-produced unit. Tin Soldiers are capable of riding these mechanical horses, which can breathe fire and smoke.
Tin Soldier (Pic)
Origin: Original
These bipedal walker-bots are used as cheap, easy-to-produce security guards and servants for Dr. Bulgrave. Their heads can fire thin, not-particularly-strong electric blasts that look sorta like when King Ghidorah shoots his beams.
War Mecha (Pic)
Origin: Original
Dr. Bulgrave based this robot walker off of Celestia's WarMech units and the Death Machine. It managed to go toe-to-toe with Celestia in combat for a while, but proved weak to her magic. After she added her spells to the mix, War Mecha was left with a fried CPU.
LOCATIONS
* Barbon's Bar and Fite Club (Manhattan. Destroyed in a fire, but Barbon is rebuilding.)
* Cornelia (Sarah's hometown)
* Curaga General Hospital (Originally St. Vincent's, a real hospital, Owltomaton renamed it Curaga General and everybody rolled with it.)
* Dr. Bulgrave's Castle (Located at the outskirts of Gunningshire. A large castle/laboratory where Dr. Bulgrave lived and worked until the kobbers ransacked it in a fight.)
* Glitch City (Missingno's homeland, a world of impossibilities and eldritch forms.)
* Gunningshire (A large city in Widow Maker's home dimension. This is where Dr. Bulgrave works, and it's where Widow Maker was born. It is the largest city on its' planet still relying upon steamworks and Victorian-era design.)
* Library (Manhattan. Gloria works here.)
* Manhattan Detention Complex (Also known as "The Tombs". This is a real prison in Manhattan. Held Dr. Bulgrave, Blade, Frost, and Deadeye Joe at one time. Currently holds Mr. X.)
* McMechos (Chain fast-food joint. Specializes in burgers and fries but also offers Murducken Nuggets and other common fast food fare.)
* Mysidia (Final Fantasy 1's world does not have a proper name, so this name normally used in the Final Fantasy series for magic-oriented towns is used to refer to Sarah's homeland.)
* Sarah's House/The Triden Residence (Manhattan. Located in a friendly and clean residential area. A small, bright-colored house with a white picket fence and pony stable. Sarah only lives here during the warmer months of the year. For the winter, she travels to Levia.)
* Sharp-Dressed Sturge (Manhattan clothing shop. Recently opened a second storefront in the local mall.)
* Tridenland (Manhattan theme park, full of Final Fantasy 1-themed rides. Run by Celestia, but Sarah, Widow Maker, and Alex also have authority over the park.)
* Tunnel System (Inside the King of Beasts, a network of tunnels in the air vents exists. These tunnels are used by small characters like Baby Widow Maker, Meat Boy, and The Swarm.)
* Widow Maker's Home Dimension (A world that develops, but does not completely rely upon, steam-powered technology and Victorian-era design. Most towns are either Victorian or modern and the cities are broken up into Victorian and Modern districts, allowing people to live in a way that fits their taste. After several decades of equality, in recent years the steam movement has begun to give way to other power sources, particularly electric and solar. It is predicted that the steampunk way of life will be a niche market within three decades.)
* Widow Maker's Winter Home (The Florida Everglades)
FOOD AND DRINK
* Alcocoahol (Alcoholic chocolate drink)
* Astro Flurry (Chocolate soft-serve ice cream with sprinkles and marshmallows)
* Bacchus' Wine (An imported low-alcohol wine from Mysidia)
* Bimp (2 scoops of ice cream, 2 cans of beer, ground up acorn bits, a pinch of boot that isn't "IMIGRANT CONKSUCK BOOTS". Jelly optional.)
* Black Legend (Imported from Epic Meal Time, a monstrous dessert with tons of sweets inside. Later enhanced with the Black Legend DX, Black Legend Super DX, Black Legend Super DX Plus, Double Black Legend, and Triple Black Legend)
* Blizzaga Wave (Blue fruit punch, blue popsicle, 2/3 cup Bacchus' Wine, chocolate bar)
* Christmas Cake (Celestia's holiday special - a layer cake topped with Mage Cookies)
* Cone of Power (Giant's Tonic and 1-Up Mushroom blended and frozen into cone shape)
* Double Eelix (Aegean Tea mixed with Achilles Eel)
* Dragon's Tooth (Marshmallow shaped like a sharp tooth)
* Elixir of Light (Lemonade with white magic and extra ice)
* Epic Meals (In addition to the Black Legend, Sarah has also consumed the Candy Poutine, the Big Stupid Smore, the Pastry Cake, and the Fast Food Fluffy Cake.)
* Final Mantisy (Neuromantis mixed with Playing With Power)
* Firaga Storm (Lemonade, orange popsicle, 2/3 cup Bacchus' Wine, chocolate bar)
* Giga Hole (a donut hole the size of a donut)
* Happy Ending (Large chocolate milkshake with pink food coloring. Serves two)
* Joker's Wild (Cotton candy infused with laughing gas)
* King's Ransom (Chocolate coins and Bacchus' Wine)
* Lucky Star (A Rice Krispie Treat but with Lucky Charms instead of Rice Krispies. Shaped like a star.)
* Mage Cookies (Celestia's classic recipe. Homemade cookies shaped like black and white mages.)
* Matoya's Brew (Bottle of apple juice, small amount of Bacchus' Wine, gummi eyeball, fudge pop)
* Micro Softie (Beer float with a Microsoft logo on top made out of food coloring)
* Neuromantis (Pepsi Blue, male mantids, Space Invaders-shaped ice cubes. Serve in cup made from melted-down Atari 2600 cartridges)
* Orange Gezora (Orange juice, pineal colada, tentacled mojito, rum and croak. Orange you glad you're not dead?)
* Playing With Power (Mushroom Shake, Octorok tentacle, pureed Metroid, tetris block ice cubes)
* Pollinator (Sugar water, ground flowers, 1 tablespoon honey, 1 dollop Royal Jelly, stir well)
* Questionable Quart (Several random leftovers thrown together)
* Raging Swarm (Sugar water, 2 to 4 dozen live arthropods, half a bottle of whiskey. Serve at room temperature.)
* Sea Serpent (Three Twinkies connected by seaweed)
* Throne of Decadence (Stack of massive pancakes to form a chair. Twinkie armrests. Entire thing coated in chocolate)
* Thundaga Blast (Orange soda, lemonade popsicle, 2/3 cup Bacchus' Wine, chocolate bar)
* Umbrella Reversal (Parasol with tiny cocktail on it)
* Victory Pie (Chocolate pie with frosting and sparklers)
* Walrus Whammy (Walrus steak drenched with vodka)
* Widow's Lament (Double Eelix mixed with Final Mantisy)
* Wulf Saber (35 half-bottles of randomly selected brands of liquor, a bucket of liquefied reality, two cups of radioactive sludge, some finely pureed madness, stir. Serve with saberwulf bobblehead and last will and testament. If David orders it, the will is not required.)
* X-Factor (Another drink chosen at random)
* Y U No Have Common Sense?! (Twinkie inside an eclair inside a swiss roll on a stick)
* Zephyrus (Noble Hero mixed with Air Man)
One thing I love about losing a bet to you is that I always know I'll be seeing it again somewhere!
ReplyDeleteI love the Betting Corner because it gives an opportunity to win new props! I even wound up reusing some of my OWN bets, like the Commodore 64, Delorean toy, and Game Brute.
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