Chatzy Madness Volume 366: I Forgot Poor People Exist

Ghengis Jenga: Dat there sure was a brawl!
Ghengis Jenga: Nicely done
Jumpropeman: thanks!
Jumpropeman: I'd be worried if it wasn't a Brawl!
emit azzip: Pffft
Ghengis Jenga: Somehow jrm wrote war and peace instead of a brawl
Jumpropeman: fuck
Jumpropeman: you would think I'd realize halfway through at least
Ghengis Jenga: Yeah it was weird how hard you doubled down
Ghengis Jenga: I appreciate the commitments tho
Jumpropeman: "War and Peace has 587,287 words, making it more than ten times longer than your NaNoWriMo novel."
Jumpropeman: I didn't realize NaNoWriMo was only 50,000 words
Jumpropeman: I guess I could NaNoWriMo if it was instead just about a bunch of video game characters killing each other
Spyleepless in Spyattle: Wait, how long was brawltide
Jumpropeman: Spy: BBB10 was 107,000 words and some change. Pre-Fite was just short of 21,000 words
Ghengis Jenga: Flipping heck
Spyleepless in Spyattle: Holy SHIT JRM

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RubyChao: i don't think spy will be insulted if i say
RubyChao: hogan winning in BBB5 would be the most retroactively awkward brawl winner possible of the ~500 candidates
RubyChao: no contest
Spaps is HYPE: Honestly, yeah
Spaps is HYPE: There's "awkward because member loses interest in the char"
Spaps is HYPE: There's "awkward because of awkwardness between members"
Spaps is HYPE: AND THEN THERE'S
Spaps is HYPE: AWKWARD BECAUSE HE DID A RACISM ON A SEX TAPE
Spaps is HYPE: If I won BBB5 with Hogan, I would've legit asked JRM to give the guaranteed champ slot to 2nd place that year
RubyChao: "well, you see, bbb4 was won by mac tongiht, bbb5 by *STATIC DISTORTION*, and bbb6 by zeldoten..."
Jumpropeman: when people go check out the ten gold statues, they notice one is covered with a sheet full time
Ghengis Jenga: The winner of bbb5: this inanimate carbon rod
Jumpropeman: it turns out Hulk Hogan didn't win, it was his shirt, who will now fite independent of his former host
Spaps is HYPE: Like, that's already kinda what we did! Said it was The Avatar of Hulkamania rather than Terry Bollea
Spaps is HYPE: Buuuuuuuut even then that lasted, like. Long enough to smile and wave him far, far offscreen
RubyChao: and to have him fight Stone Cold Steve Austin
RubyChao: but that was it
emit azzip: I’d vote for inanimate carbon rod

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Gooper Blooper: the feeling I get when the brawl's done is the feeling I get after I'm done opening all my christmas presents

Chatzy Madness Volume 365: Big Bar Brawl 10 Edition

Jumpropeman: "Mary knows a thing or two about fighting thanks to her sister, the BBB5 champion Silence. She's the leader of the group," I know her well
Jumpropeman: and she's finally back
Jumpropeman: to land that sale
Gooper Blooper: CS
Gooper Blooper: Convenience Store
Gooper Blooper: UNH
Jumpropeman: come on Reiko, put it in the fridge!
Jumpropeman: or it expires in six days
Jumpropeman: "Grab-N-Go is a huge target, and is far from graceful. The treads can handle rough terrain, but are slow and ungainly." so what I'm hearing is
Jumpropeman: stick them in the asteroid section
Gooper Blooper: the water
Gooper Blooper: the moron mountain pathways
Jumpropeman: I'll just put them in the stands to start
Gooper Blooper: Perched precariously atop the pennzoil cans
Jumpropeman: ah yes
Jumpropeman: xyra
Jumpropeman: *pencils in number 1 vote*
N Goat: Who?
Jumpropeman: I like to believe it won't happen
Jumpropeman: I'm a more complex individual than that
N Goat: Are you sure?
Jumpropeman: but also
Jumpropeman: SHE'S SUCH A CUTIE
Gooper Blooper: *has Xyra spend the next five days sitting in valhalla eating pizza and drinking dr pepper while calling Mega Drive cool*
Jumpropeman: you fiend
Jumpropeman: "(there are other transformations besides these, and JRM is free to make up his own if he wishes):"
Jumpropeman: *glasses shimmer*

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Jumpropeman: oh my, forgot how emaciated Ralph looks
Jumpropeman: I should really watch Rampage to prepare for this!
Jumpropeman: and to see Ralph glide like a flying squirrel
Draco: That was really one of the sillier parts, which is why it was great.
Draco: It's the Big Bkaiju Brawl this year.
Jumpropeman: how dare you call Lizzie dumb D:<
Draco: You're right. I'll change that so she's an MIT graduate.
Jumpropeman: she's at least twice as smart as shimmer!
Draco: To be fair, even Shimmer is smarter than Shimmer, she's THAT dumb.

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ivel: "-Jack Spicer is nothing more than a cowardly, pasty wimp with a fragile ego and an inferiority complex who has hidden himself away from the world," Pito is supposed to save the deaths for the Brawl, not their entries