A mantis. A white mage. A black mage. Several robots, a steampunk scientist, a horde of unruly bikers... it was quite crowded and chaotic in the small meeting room. A boombox desperately tried to keep the peace with relaxing elevator music.
Okay, people. People, can we bring this meeting to order?
"You quit freakin' staring at me, Bulgrave."
"Or else what, Project 28?"
"I'll sic Sarah on you."
"Ooh, a girl in a wheelchair. Pardon me while I wet myself, Project 28."
"Leave my daughter out of this."
People.
"Gooper is right. Can we settle down, please?", asked a girl wearing a green hood and brown dress.
"Who the hell are you?"
"Don't talk to my daughter like that!"
"What, another one? How many freaking kids did you pop out, anyway?"
"Four," Celestia said coldly.
"Where are the other two?"
They said they couldn't make it. Sick, I think.
"Bah, whatever. Let's get started."
"For once I'm agreeing with Dr. Bullshit. Let's get this over with."
Yes, lets. Okay, first item on the agenda... the Storm Bikers wanted to air a grievance?
"Damn right. We want assurances that we won't be killed off."
"This is the first steady job I've ever held!"
"I DON'T WANNA DIE"
Will you calm down?!
"WHY DID THE BIKER HAVE A SNACK AFTER BEING FIRED? BECAUSE THE PINK SLIP WAS A LOAF OF BREAD."
Listen, you guys are villains. Villain characters have a pretty poor record of survival at Zoofights. If you want to live, I suggest a Heel Face Turn.
"Fuck that noise! I ain't pulling a Celestia, and the boys won't either."
"YEAH!"
"Stop discriminating against the working villain, you ass!"
"WE'LL SUE"
Uuuugh.
"So when is the fight happening, anyway?"
Don't know. I want to see if we can reach Erebus first. It'd be nice to have Eshe or Erebus or Pech or even Antoinette onboard, and I know Tornado is aching to match bikes with Doomrider.
"That fire-headed mutant's bike is far inferior to Cyclone."
Yes, yes, heard it a million- Sarah, what are you doing.
"Just having a snack."
"Heh heh. Good ol' little sis."
Put that away, there's no eating in the meeting room.
"I hope you brought enough donuts for everybody."
"She didn't even bring enough donuts for herself! Pfffft hahahaha-"
"Am I ever going to get to do anything else?"
Please have patience, Electra. There are an awful lot of you and I don't know if-
"So i have been THINKING......... about a SUGESTOIN to improve the RP......."
"Oh for fuck's sake what is he doing here"
"What am I looking at?"
Jeff, go away.
"The RP has too many WORDS and SAYINGS! Ther should be more short posses like in the goog old days that I was there for."
Jeff, that ship has sailed. Big character rosters and subplots everywhere in this bitch.
"god DAMMMMMMNNNNNNNNN"
Yeah, whatever. Does anyone have any other issues they'd like to address?
"I was thinking about adding a moral to our subplots."
A moral? Sarah, this isn't Aesop's Fables or a Saturday morning cartoon. This is Zoofights RP!
"That doesn't mean we can't use our positions to help educate!"
"Uh, you got a little frosting on your cheek there, kid."
"Thanks, Electra. Eheheh..."
What exactly did you have in mind, Sarah?
"I was thinking clean energy."
...What?
"You know, going green! We could have the bikers switch to electric bikes, and outfit the slums with LED bulbs, and-"
"Advocate steam power and you've got my support."
"Sarah, this is ridiculous. And green technology sucked in the 90s, anyway. Also Dr. Bozo supports it and you'll never catch me on board with any plan of that bastard."
"Oh, FUCK YOU."
"Can I at least tell people to recycle?"
Sarah, I don't think we need any morals in our- DON'T YOU GIVE ME THOSE EYES.
STOP.
STOP THAT.
MEETING ADJOURNED, MEETING ADJOURNED!
